Strawberries And Snares
by 007twihunger
Summary: All Madge's life she's had to act like the perfect mayors daughter, but now that she is a tribute to the 74th hunger games will the real Madge be seen and will she be able to last, not only the other twenty-two tributes but as well as her district partner. *Sorry if this summary sucks lol. *I don't own The Hunger Games Suzanne Collins does.
1. Chapter 1 The Reaping Part One

**_* Author Note: This is my first fanfiction so please be gentle. Having said that please feel free to tell me what you think. I apologize before hand if I missed any errors in this. Thank you for taking the time to read my little fanfiction. -007twihunger xoxo_**

**_Chapter One: The Reaping_**

I stare out the backdoor window as my hands hover in the air over the pristine black and white keys of the piano, until I realize what I'm doing then almost immediately I duck my head and press the keys down and try to come up with what song I should play. I end up deciding on an old song my mother use to sing to me when I was little called the Hanging Tree. The song doesn't have any sheet music to it so I have to make up my own but since I play by ear it isn't that hard. Just as I submerge myself into the song there is a sharp knock at my backdoor which makes me jerk away from the piano slightly as well as accidentally press a few wrong keys making me wince before I pull my hands into my lap then rise from the piano bench. I straighten out my new white dress. Just as I start walking towards the backdoor there is a timid knock, which makes me pick up my pace a little since I know that that last knocked belonged to Katniss while the foremost belonged to Gale.

When I reach the door I pause then pull in a much needed breath before making sure my dress and hair are presentable in the hallway mirror before I plaster on my best Capital smile. With one more breath I open the door and take it the two seam kids standing on my back porch. Katniss gives me a friendly smile while she tugs awkwardly at the end of her braid as Gale openly glares at me, his arms folded across his chest. My eyes immediately search out Katniss, I offer up as much of a real smile as I can with Gale so close and glaring at me for things I can't control. Katniss offers up the container of strawberries her and Gale bring me whenever there in season.

"Thanks" I mumble meekly taking the basket from my friends outstretched hands before placing the container of strawberries onto the counter and even swifter yanking down the jar we keep on top of the refrigerator for strawberries. With a small awkward smile I hand Katniss the coins like I do every transaction, completely ignoring Gale. But unlike normally Gale catches my eye as he states at me openly. Looking me up then down before saying "pretty dress Undersee" with a smile on his face. I smile back feeling pleasantly surprised by his comment. I look down and straighten my dress once more before looking up at him and noticing that he's not smiling at me but instead smirking. With a heavy sinking heart I just stare at him before replying in a monotone "well if I end up going to the Capital, I want to looks nice, don't I?" which makes him glare venomously at me, his arms drop then fist at his sides as he takes a small step toward me "you won't be going to the Capital," Gale says coolly as his hard gray eyes come to rest on my gold pin on the front of my dress. I fight the urge to fix my pin under his close scrutiny. "What could you have? Five entries? I had six when I was just twelve" I glare at him and open my mouth ready to retort but before I can Katniss says "that's not her fault" causing me to smile at her genuinely, silently thanking her for defending me to her best friend. "No ones fault. Just the way it is" Gale replies haughtily, making me absentmindedly close off my face and take on my Capital mayor's daughter smile as well as my role that I was taught at the tender age of three.

I offer Katniss one last genuine smile as I continue to ignoring Gale Hawthorne's existence, "good luck, Katniss" "You too" she says giving me a grimace in the place of the smile I know she tries to give me, silently apologizing to me about her best friend before they turn and trudge towards the backyard gate. I watch them for a few more seconds before closing the backdoor then placing the container of strawberries for a later snack into the refrigerator. It doesn't take me too long to pull on my black kitten heels and after that I'm rushing from my house towards the bakery.

I ignore the glances, laughs, and dirty looks pointed at me from people as I rush through town towards the bakery to see my best friend and only friend besides Katniss and his brothers. Once I reach the bakery I can't help but release a relieved sigh, seeing the practically empty bakery, save from the Mellark boys and no doubt there parents probably in the back. A goofy grin spreads across my face as I watch through the large window of the bakery as Rye tosses a handful of flour at his younger brother, making Peeta immediately retaliate by tossing a handful of what looks like either salt or sugar into Rye's shaggy blond hair. With a happy smile I walk into the bakery, causing the bell overhead to chime my greeting. All three Mellark boys look at me and grin warmly at me as I make my way up to the counter. "What can I get for you Madgie?" Peeta's bright voice asks. I stare down at the display case looking at all the yummy treats before looking back up at my best friend, giving him a smile as I do, "a three tiered chocolate cake with strawberry filling, a loaf of bread, and two apple turnovers. Please and thank you" is my sweet reply which gains a snort of laughter from both Bannock and Rye, who are adding and rearranging things in the display case as well as the few baskets and treys behind the counter.

Peeta narrows his eyes at me causing me to do the same, silently saying its okay for me to buy him things since he's my one true friend … well besides the silent friendship Katniss and I share, but that's only at school where we're both friendless, for two very different reasons. Katniss's being that she's as friendly as a cactus while no one wants to be friends with the likes of me because of who my father is. "What? Am I not allowed to buy food for my best friend, in the hopes I can bribe him to spend some time with me?" I question with a raised eyebrow daring him to object but knowing he won't since he buys me small things on occasion with the small monthly allowance he gets from his dad for working at the bakery. Peeta and I glare one last time at each other for good measures before Peeta grumbles out a "fine" as he starts to ring up my purchases to my families account then rather quickly placing two fresh apple turnovers into a dessert box before placing a no doubt fresh loaf of bread on the back corner of the bar behind him where things wait for delivery. "You need the cake for tonight right for after the reaping?" Bannock asks as he jots down on a small notepad. I just smile and nod my head. After Peeta hands me the dessert box with our apple turnovers in them as he turns towards his brothers "I'm going to take my break now" he says taking off his apron then placing it on an empty hook before making his way from around the corner to me.

Peeta and I sit in comfortable silence as we watch his older brothers ring up peoples purchases while we nibble at on our apple turnovers. "How are things with your mom going?" Peeta questions making me jump slightly from being startles by his sudden question. My gaze swiftly comes to rest on my best friend. Light blues eyes meet dark blue eyes. I stare at him a few seconds, trying my best to think how I should reply so I don't breakdown and cry, "the same, I guess." Is the very intellectual response I'm capable of thinking up off the top of my head. Peeta nods, not looking at me but instead at his half eaten turnover he holds. "How are things with your mom going?" I ask, throwing his own question back at him as my eyes search his face, which is for once void free of any cuts or bruises. I watch as Peeta's shoulders lift then drop "she's been all bark and no bite for the past two weeks" he states lowly for only me to hear as the bell over the door announces two new customers. It's not a surprise to anyone that Mrs. Mellark not only beats her three son's but her husband as well.

I watch as Peeta takes notice of something over my right shoulder before dropping his gaze to his now discarded apple turnover. That one look and I know. That one look of hurt that passes through Peeta's kind warm blue eyes lets me know that the two new costumers are Katniss and Gale. Thoughts of my turnover are far from my mind as I too discard my treat into the dessert box it came in that is placed in between us on the table. Not too subtly I look over my right shoulder at the two hunters, watching as they converse quietly amongst themselves as they make their way up to the counter. Katniss looks both uncomfortable and worried while Gale, who stands close at her side looks the same as always tall, dark, handsome, and silently brooding as he scowls but when he catches me staring at him, he gives me a hard gray glare filled with so much anger and 100% pure hatred that is directed solely at me. My heart drops as does my head as I turn back around. My whole face feels hot and that alone tells that my face much be red from my blush of embarrassment.

After a short beat and no doubt when Peeta notices my crestfallen face, that is still faced towards the table. He reaches over the table to grasp my hand in his own, which has me glancing up at him through my eyelashes offering up a small appreciative smile as I give his hand a thanking squeeze before moving back so my hands rest in my lap. We both try our hardest not to listen to the two seam kids at the counter only a few feet off to our left with Peeta's brothers. Because we're so close to the counter its rather hard to ignore their conversation since we hear every word spoken between the four of them. "Your supposed to come to the back" Bannock states evenly as Rye glares at Gale. Katniss shifts on her feet as her hands wring the strap of her bag "we tried, but no one came when we knocked so…" Katniss puts forth before trailing off. And even though I'm not looking at her, I see when she looks over my way, so me being friends with her makes me immediately turn to offer her a small smile but I frown as I see she has her gray eyes on Peeta's blond slightly shaggy hair, which has some flour in it from Rye's previous attack a while ago.

Just as I'm about to let Peeta know about Katniss staring at him my eyes meet gray ones that belong to my friend, which she drops to the ground quickly. "Can we trade or what?" Gale snaps, his eyes not looking away from the glare Rye sends him but instead Gale glare right back until Katniss releases an annoyed sigh. "Can you please wait outside Gale" she whispers, gaining Gale to drop his glare at Rye in favor of looking at his best friend and hunting partner that we all know he is in love with, well everyone besides Katniss herself. Gale doesn't say anything in reply to Katniss before he scowls then storms out of the bakery, leaving Katniss to tend to the trade like always. "I got two squirrels and a pretty plump rabbit" Katniss offers up awkwardly, her hands immediately go to the end of her braid to pull at it like she does at school when she's nervous. Her eyes look from Rye then to Bannock before settling on the latter of them, since Rye's still visibly fuming. Its not that Rye doesn't like people form the seam, its just that he doesn't like Gale. He says its because Gale's a hypocritical prejudice asshole who has made it almost impossible for Peeta to even talk to the girl he's loved since he was five. But the way Rye's eyes cloud over with such hate I think there's more to it than he tells me or even lets up.

"Sure thing Everdeen" Bannock grins wiping his flour covered hands on his apron before gesturing towards the back of the shop "I'm pretty busy making a cake order for the mayor or I could help you, and Rye's on his break. My mom and dad are in town taking some orders out, so you can either trade with Peeta or try coming back later when its not so busy. " Bannock adds on, "of course there moms not here" I think as I realize that they wouldn't have been playing around while at work let alone throwing ingredients at each other. Rye, Peeta, and I are floored by Bannock's words, never once has Ban tried to intervene with either of his younger brothers love lives so its way more than a shock that he's doing this for Peeta. Katniss hesitantly as well as rather shyly looks over at Peeta, silently asking him if that's okay with him but he remains too shock to offer up a reply so I do. "Peeta would love to help you Kat. Besides I have to go anyway" I tell Katniss then address Peeta with the last part of my statement, trying my hardest to not grin like a fool at my best friend like he's already doing to me. "You're the best Madgie!" Peeta mumbles lowly causing me to smile and roll my eye in return.

Peeta and I both get up from the table at the same time. I watch with a small smile as Peeta leads Katniss to the back of the shop to trade. Just as I start to make my way towards the shops front door Rye calls my name "Madge!" I turn and look at him with a raised eyebrow as I try to hide my smile at seeing his bright and hopeful face, "didn't you her Ban? I'm on my break … want to come upstairs?" Rye asks shyly rubbing the back of his neck as his smile slowly vanishes from his face. It takes me a minute before I realized I haven't answered his question and instead have been staring at him for god knows how long with a goofy smile on my face. I drop my gaze to my black kitten heels, my eyes tracing over the buckle on the top of my feet as I try to hide the no doubt bright red blush I know is tinted to my cheeks. Rye chuckles then lean over the counter so he's resting on his arms, still waiting for my reply. With a bite of my lip I finally look up then offer Rye a shy nod, that gets me large smile from him. Rye jerks his head into a nod as he takes off his apron and hangs it up next to Peeta's, not taking his eyes off me "Okay cool. I'll just clean up my station then meet you out back" he states. I nod in agreement before quickly leaning over the counter and placing a small chaste kiss to his lip then even quicker taking off for the door at a fast speed walk, not looking back at either of the Mellark boys that are still behind the counter.

Almost immediately my arms cross over my chest and my hands rub almost absentmindedly up my arms then down them before repeating the process over and over again, from the crisp morning air blowing through the district. I walk slowly towards the back of the bakery knowing Rye won't be done for a few minutes, since he has to not only clean up his station in the back but the large mess he and Peeta had made with the flour and sugar. My eyes peer to the sky, taking in the dark glooming sky that has an eerie feeling to it, like something is off today. And I guess in a way it is since today's the reaping for the seventy-fourth hunger games and two kids that go to my school will be chosen to fight to the death in the games.

Once I reach the back of the shops I easily find the one that belongs to the bakery then stand awkwardly, trying my best to not get any coal dust on my new dress. My blond curls blow around my shoulders making me have to tighten the pink ribbon I have tied to hold my hair back from my face, twice. "What are you doing back here princess?" the very familiar annoyed voice of Gale sneers from my left. It only takes me a few seconds before I spot him leaning against one of the shops walls, hidden away by the shadow of the roof, which easily stops the sun from streaming into the back alley of the shops on days like today. My face scrunches up as I try to make out his face that is still slightly concealed in the shadows, "none of your damn business Hawthorne" I reply with just as much annoyance lacing my voice. I feel proud of myself for being able to reply so quickly as I turn my gaze towards the backdoor of the bakery, wishing more than anything that Rye would hurry the hell up and save me from getting a tongue lashing from the jerk I helplessly have a rather large crush on. It surprisingly makes my crush grow bigger with every rude thing Gale says to me. Not because I like being treated like trash but because at least he has the courage to say what he feels to my face instead of whisper it behind my back like everyone else seems to do, they hate me but then will pretend that we're best friends if they want something. That's something I came to learn when I was younger, when the kids in my class pretended to be my friends because I had things they wanted but that sure as hell didn't stop them from pushing me down, pulling my hair or calling me rude names two minutes later.

Oh would you look at that, the townie can cuss" Gale teases, if these words were spoken to me from Peeta or one of his brothers I would probably laugh and swat at them for teasing me but since its Gale saying it I don't, and that's because I know without a doubt he detests me as well as doesn't mean it the playful teasing way friends do but the way a lot of people look at the other social class in the district, like there better. No matter if it's the seam or town, that doesn't stop from the rather large and ugly prejudice that seems to plague not only district twelve but the other districts of Panem. I turn on my heels to glare at Gale, letting my arms drop to my side as I clench my hands into fists trying to keep myself from lunging and punching Gale in the face repeatedly. A small smile pulls at the corner of my lips as I think about actually being able to punch him, the idea is more than a little appealing but then I think of the consequences. Of Peacekeepers getting involved because, of who my father is. Of Gale getting angry to the point of him to froth at the mouth, as he continues to shoot bigoted slurs one after the other at me. Probably all the things he keeps himself from saying to me on any other day. I deflate almost immediately as I take in the anger on Gale's face, telling me he doesn't care who he's arguing with. He just wants to target his anger somewhere so he can vent his frustrations probably on how hard his life is and how shitty town folks like myself are or maybe that Katniss is so clueless to not only Gale's feeling for her as well as the ones Peeta so obviously has himself. I open my mouth to ask if he's okay and if he maybe might want to talk about whatever's bugging him but before I can utter a single word the backdoor of the bakery swings open and out walks Rye with a large smile on his face that almost immediately vanishes once he takes sight of Gale a few feet away from me, then he glares and quickly bounds down the few steps that lead up to the bakeries backdoor. "Madge come on" Rye says as he reaches me then intertwines our fingers together before pulling towards the back of the bakery that has a flight of stairs that lead up to where the Mellark's live, above the bakery.

I let Rye tow me along close behind him, not wanting to start anymore problems between Gale and Rye but before we make it up the three steps of the back porch Gale's humorless voice calls after us "I didn't know you were a dog Undersee." I clench my jaw and tighten my hand around Rye's as I feel him start to turn so he can defend me but just as he turns I step in front of him, not letting him have a clear view of the over six foot seam kid he's hated for ever. "Just let it go Rye, he's not worth it. Just let it go" I breath resting my free hand on the side of Rye's face, making him look at me. With a clenched jaw and some hesitation Rye nods in agreement before letting go of my hand then walking a little ways in front of me. I can't help but glance back at Gale and frown seeing his hard eyes still fixed on us, before he lets out a low aggravated growl then turns and stomps off and just as I'm about to shut the bakeries backdoor behind me, I hear the almost undetectable murmur of "I didn't know you were such a slut Undersee. I wonder what the mayor would think if he found out?" come from Gale who isn't that far down the alleyway. My heart plummets into my stomach and turns sickly before I'm filled from head to toe with the normal numbness that always follows after the very few things Gale manages to say that actually hurt me.

I follow Rye up the backstairs towards his house with my head turned downwards as I worry my bottom lip, trying everything I can think of to not think about Gale's words that seem to play on repeat in my head. Was I a slut? I mean the only guy I've ever kissed has been Rye and that started no latter than three days ago. Rye was walking me home after I had spent the day over at the bakery, helping the Mellark's make cookies and cakes since those were the only things I could actually manage to make. It was cold that night so we walked more closely together than we normally would. We had got to my house and just as I turned to wish Rye a save trip back home as well as goodnight, my lips are quickly met with Rye's lips and I'm rendered speechless as I stare wide eyed at a boy who I've know my whole life feeling awkward as well as not knowing what to do or even what to say. Rye had pulled back and just stared at me for a few seconds with this small smile on his face that made him look like a kid on Christmas so I had just kept quiet half hoping he would just mumble an apology before quickly heading home but instead he asks "can I kiss you again?" His question hangs in the air in an almost unbearable eerie silence, us just staring at each other. My stomach is in knots and I'm in uncharted waters. No guy from town or seam has ever tired to peruse me let alone try and kiss me, I let my eyes drop to my white flats that have coal dust smeared on them from the small trek to the edge of town I made with Peeta earlier in the day on a delivery.

Only when I'm able to stand Rye's intense gaze do I venture looking back up at my friend. My eyes meet uncertain icy blue eyes that hold nothing but warmth for me, "okay" I manage to get out as I realize that maybe Rye will be the only guy to ever like me. He smiles brightly at me and I feel my face turn red from a blush as he continues to look at me like I'm the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, I would have to disagree with that notion but the look on his face tells me he wouldn't. I meet Rye halfway in a small chaste kiss that leaves me feeling slightly different than just a few minutes ago. "Did you hear a word I said to Madge?" Rye asks waving his hand in front of my face as I come out of my own thoughts, I frown at him and slowly shake my head no, which makes him groan playfully at me before giving me a wink as I follow Rye down the small hallway then into the last door in the back which is the room Rye and Peeta share. Rye waits for us to be in his room with the door shut as we sit on the edge of his bed before he repeats whatever he had told me earlier when I was trapped in my own thoughts. "I said someone needs to teach that piece of shit seam rat his place. Your always too lenient with him. Your fathers the mayor, he could put Gale into the stocks for a few hours to get it through his tiny brain who he can and can't disrespect like that" Rye seethes glaring at his work shoes that are slightly sprinkled with flour. I watch as Rye yanks off one then the next shoe before throwing it rather hard at the ground making them bounce with a low thug on the ground from the force. I don't know what I'm supposed to say as I sit here next to Rye. I'm at a loss of words so I do the only thing I can think of that will keep him from storming over to the Justice Building to complain about Gale's disregard of the respect that the mayor and his family should receive from the people of district twelve, I kiss him. my lips slam into his and for a few seconds he just sits there staring at me as I press my lips harder to his then the next thing I know he's pulling back from me and staring at me with furrowed eyebrows, silently questioning my assault. "I don't want to waste my breath talking about some seam boy" I say with as much annoyance and distain as I can force into my voice even though it makes me feel physically ill. A smile slowly makes its way onto Rye's face before I'm met with his lips and slowly forced to lay back on his bed.

"I think somethings wrong with me" I silently pounder to myself as I move my lips in time with Rye's, I should feel something when I kiss Rye, right? I mean there should be some type of spark like there is in books. "Maybe your just thinking too much into it instead of just enjoying the nice numbness that flows through you when you lose yourself in kisses with Rye Mellark" a small voice in the back of my mind says and for once I take its advice and close my eyes and focus on the bliss of nothingness Rye gives me as I let my arms hang loosely around his neck and continue to kiss him.

I head home to retouch up my appearance after awkwardly leaving the Mellark's house after Mrs. Mellark walked in on her second oldest son pressing my small frame into his mattresses as his hands started to wander towards the end of my dress and not too surprising I feel thankful for her intrusion knowing I'm not ready to move forward in whatever we're doing. The walk home doesn't take as long as the journey to the bakery, probably because I'm sprinting the whole way so I can get further away from Rye's wandering hands and his delighted mothers look she gave me once she found us. I frown thinking about how my dad would probably have had a conniption if he had found us like that in my room. With a low groan in my throat I quickly rush up the front steps of my porch then into my house, shutting the door louder than I mean to behind me. "Margaret is that you?" my father calls from his office, from down the back hall near the basement door. I suck in a sharp shaky breath as I quickly straighten out my slightly creased dress before replying sweetly "yes father. Did you want to speak to me?" as I stand in the hallway staring at his open office door. I'm not allowed anywhere near my fathers office, this one or the one at the Justice Building probably because he get Capital mail about the other districts and what not. "Yes Pearl I need to talk to you" is my fathers reply which I honestly expected. What I didn't expect was the slight panic in his voice.

I don't know how long I stand in the hallway just staring at the mahogany door of my fathers office, but it feels like hours instead of how ever long it actually takes. But when I start making my way towards my fathers office, its with small frail steps and a heavy lump in my throat that leaves me forgetting how to speak. I feel like I did when I was little and I would have to go to my fathers office for a punishment that was tapped for the Presidents sick pleasure, to make sure that the officials that Snow picked to be in power around the districts would be on their best behavior all the time not to mention have us following his every word. I stop just in front of the threshold of the door, just staring at my father who has his face in his hands then with a shaky inhale I school my features and make my way into his office with more speed and respect as I'm supposed to.

I sit in the brown leather chair in front of my fathers desk, running my fingers over the stich work on the arm of the chair as I wait for my father to address whatever he needs to speak to me about. When my father finally looks up from his hands at me I notice that his normal kind warm eyes are sorrow filled. "The President called me today" he started, not revealing anything in his detached voice or his eyes that seem to stare at me like I'm a little girl again, instead of the sixteen year old girl or rather young lady I am today. I want to ask what Snow said, to get my father talking faster instead of saying something only to cut off and stare at me for a few moments before he averts his eyes and begins again. "He's going to be attending your birthday ball along with a 'friend' who he would very much like you to meet as well as show around our lovely district" I stare at my father feeling empty and numb. I find myself thinking "I'm going to get set up by some disgusting monster to one of his disgusting friends who are no doubt as horrible as him." Its not a secret amongst me and my family and all the ones like mine that are appointed the opportunity of getting their future like myself picked out for them since nothing will change besides the fact that we will, no doubt still be living in the houses we grew up in our whole lives and will raise the children we're forced to have with some man or woman we don't know as well as be made into the beautiful yet quiet mayors wife or husband. "Daddy…" I whisper then trail off not knowing what more to say. My eyes swell with tears and my throat feels heavy with emotion, my father just looks at me sorrowfully "you have until then to get one of those Mellark boys to propose to you … Or Darius, he is a nice boy. I'm sure he would love to be with you Pearl" "if I find someone before my birthday and manage to get engaged … will I … will I still be forced to marry whoever President Snow want me to?" I ask in a detached voice, my eyes staring into my fathers green eyes unseeingly as I think my question through "surely he couldn't if I was already spoken for" I think nodding absentmindedly to myself before looking back at my father with large eyes. Once I feel his hands reach out and grasp my much smaller hand in his I glance up at him. "Its worth a try" he states lowly, almost too lowly for me to hear but then that means the bugs wired all throughout my house most likely won't pick it up. I give my father a reassuring nod before getting to my feet "I should freshen up, the reaping is in an hour" I say with a nod of my head sending my curls into my face and swishing wildly around my shoulders "we'll talk more tonight. We haven't been on a walk in a while" my father says almost like an afterthought but I hear his hidden meaning behind it. 'We'll talk later where the President can't hear us' his eyes say and all I can do is nod them give him a small smile before pressing a kiss to his cheek then retreat out of his office and towards my room to fix my windswept hair and creased dress.

As I pass my mothers room I stop seeing her door is cracked open. My bottom lip becomes ensnared between my teeth as I search first up the hall then down the hall with my large blue eyes, making sure I won't get yelled at for bothering my mother from her rest. With one last glance down both sides of the hallway I hesitantly make my way into my mothers room only to stop as I see her perched up against the headboard and already smiling warmly at me, her clouded blue eyes brimmed with tears. "May? Oh Maysilee I thought you died. Oh than god it was only a dream" my mothers airy voice says as a watery smile takes place on her thin chapped lips making me feel as if a dagger or five stabs at my heart. I just stare at the shell of the woman who use to garden with me, who use to sneak into my bedroom from ages three to five so we could have a small birthday party with just her, dad, and me without all the Capital guest acting as if they cared even a sliver about some mayors daughter of the poorest district in Panem. "Yes Madeline I'm fine. What have I told you about watching those horrid games before bed?" I chastise lightly as I make my way over to my mothers bed then gently sit down on the edge of the bed as I try to not jostle my mother too much. I give her a genuine smile as I gently start running my fingers through her hair, "just try to go back to sleep Maddie" I whisper, trying to keep my fingers from shaking from the hurt and anger I feel about my own mother who is too sick to realize I'm her sixteen year old daughter who is still alive and needs her very much instead of the long dead aunt I've never met. "Maybe she knows I'm me and instead just chooses to act like I'm May" I think then instantly disregard my thought knowing she would never do that to me. "That would be too cruel" I think helping ease my mother so she's laying down before I pull her comforter up to her shoulders before I return to running my long slender fingers through her thin pale blond hair. "I love you May" I hear my mother sleepily whisper and I can't help the tears that leak out of my eyes and down my cheeks, absorbing into the collar of my dress. "I love you too mom" I breath only slight above a whisper as I lean down then place a kiss on my mothers forehead lightly, not wanting to press too hard since she looks so frail. Like she might burst into dust if she is so much touched, without anything other than care.

I quickly clean my face then reapply my makeup since my crying had streaked my mascara and eyeliner. I only have to re-iron my new dress as well as run a brush through my hair once before I'm presentable for reaping. Before too long its one and I'm walking alone towards the square to get signed in before the reaping starts. Instead of watching the people around me and taking in the too festive looking decorations that are set up every year for reaping, I find myself being entirely too engrossed with the light coat of coal dust smeared to the small silver on the buckles of the straps of my black kitten heels. I get into the first line I see and don't even flinch as an ungodly orange woman I've never seen before jerks my hand towards her then pricks my finger without care. "Name and age?" the orange woman rasp, not looking up from the compute in front of her that has a recent picture of me smiling "oh come on" I think before swallowing down my anger from her lack of manors, intellect, and respect. "Margaret Maysilee Undersee and I'm sixteen" I say with forced sweetness that makes me sound like the bubbly naive girl the mayors daughter is supposed to be. The woman just gives me an annoyed jerky nod telling me to find my section before she calls for the next person in line.

The further I get the tighter it gets and the harder it is to move through the crowd of people until I come to stop in the sixteen year old girl section. "Hey Madge" Delilah Cartwright aka Delly calls as she gently and meekly makes her way through the tight crowd until she is standing next to me quietly. Delly is the daughter of the only shoe maker in our district, so like me she doesn't have too may friends and I instantly feel guilt bubbling up inside as I think about how I didn't count her as my friend when I thought about the very few friends I have. Its kind of sad to think I'm such a loser, I mean you'd think at least some of the town kids would want to be my friend with the mayors daughter since I'm one of them in many ways but no. the only people who actually are friendly with me are Peeta, Katniss, Rye, Bannock, Delly, Darius, and our drunk victor Haymitch Abernathy who happens to be my godfather so maybe he doesn't count. But if he doesn't count then neither does Darius or Delly since I'm pretty sure they only talk to me let alone hang out with me on very slim occasions like when I'm shopping in town, because they feel bad for me and maybe so does Katniss. "Hi Delly" I grin, not wanting to spend too much time thinking about my awful life because then I start feeling guilty and ridiculous about all the people who have it a hundred times worse than I do. "How have you been doing?" I ask acting like we're in one of the shops buying things instead of waiting here like cattle, patiently waiting to see who's being sent off to be slaughtered. I watch as Delly turns towards me more beamingly before she jumps into a lengthy story about how she's secretly dating a seam boy named Thom and that her parents would kill her if they knew. I play my part to a tee smiling, squealing with delight, and swooning right when I'm supposed to. I frown realizing how easy it is to act like the perfect mayors daughter, that I don't have to pay any attention to the thing around me any longer.

Just as Delly starts gushing over the date Thom took her on last night Katniss walks up to my side and offers up a sympathetic smile that I return genuinely. Katniss and Delly trade hellos as I watch my father along with our district escort Effie Trinket, and my drunk godfather Haymitch Abernathy make their way out onto the stage. Haymitch stumbles over to an empty seat as Effie looks on at him with disgust as she takes the seat furthest from him as my father starts off the reaping just like every year. I could probably recite his speech asleep from the age of ten and I guess that's good since I'm either gong to be the next mayor or my future husband will be.

My eyes fall then lock on my shoes, taking in the fine stitching that Mr. Cartwright has done as I tune out the noise around me until I hear the one noise I haven't been able to tune out for the last sixteen years, Effie Trinket, "Happy Hunger Games! And may the odds be ever in your favor!" her overly cheery voice rings out around us as we all watch her, silently praying our names won't be called but knowing two of them will, but which two? Effie's pink wig shifts slightly as she walks over to the large reaping bowls, one for the boys and one for the girls. "Ladies first!" her shrill voice states as she dips her hand into the large bowl, that contains everyone girl from the age of twelve to eighteen names in it from our district. My name is in that bowl five times and maybe its not as much as Katniss or Gale but it is still a lot. "My aunt only had five when she was chosen" I think, feeling an uncomfortable knot form in my stomach "your not her" I think. Everything happens so fast that I'm pretty sure its in slow-motion. First thing being that Effie has finally pulled some unlucky girls name form the bow, second being that every one around me steps back and stares at me like I'm even more of a leaper than they normally do, and thirdly the name she calls out is mine.

"Margaret Undersee" Effie repeats as I stand stalk still thinking I might have misheard her but the look on Katniss and Delly's face tell me other wise, so immediately I turn into the small scared little girl that every woman has secretly hiding inside of them and look to my father hoping somehow he can save me but the pure heart wrenching sadness and fear I see in his wide eyes tells me otherwise.

"Come on my dear no need to be shy" Effie's sickly too sweet voice croons as she gives me a bright smile and I realize how I'm making myself look, I look weak. I quickly plaster a sheepish smile on my face then at a moderate pace that I usually walk at, make my way up to the stage. Every step I take closer to the stage feels like another and another nail in my coffin, "I wonder if they'll tell my mother that I'm dead or just act like I never exsisted like they try to do with my aunt" I can't help but think as I come to stand before my district, feeling every bit the small scared girl everyone here thinks I am.


	2. Chapter 2 The Reaping Part Two

*Author note- So here's chapter two. I hope you guys like it :) I'm floored with how many people have read my first chapter so yet again thank you guys, you are the best! Sorry again if I didn't correct al my errors. With further adieu, I hope you enjoy it :) -007twihunger

**_Chapter Two: The Reaping Part Two._**

I can't help but stare out over the crowd of people who have never liked me and it hurts seeing all the relieved faces but that doesn't mean I don't see a few sad faces as well, but those faces belong to the very few people who know me. The annoying airy yet shrill laugh from Effie who I find already looking at me, "pardon?" my hushed voice pulls, my eyes sweep from Effie's overly ecstatic face then to my dad who is sitting numbly just staring at me with such sorrowed you'd already think I was dead. My heart constricts painfully in my chest thinking about how maybe my own father has given up on me. My eyes swiftly move on to look at godfather who is just staring at me drunkenly like maybe he thinks this is happening all inside his head "its not! I'm going into the games and I'm going to die." I want to scream at him then follow up by pleading him to keep me safe because I don't want to die, but then who really does. Effie clears her throat a little too close to the microphone which makes me flinch away slightly before glancing at her once more "I said, I bet my button's that you're the mayors daughter, aren't you?" Effie says with a megawatts smile. I finally take in her outfit and see that there are in fact a lot of buttons, not only on Effie's fuchsia dress but her matching blazer that goes over it. Then my eyes come on her crazy too high, high heels which have there own assortment of buttons and zippers to them which has me holding back a smile and laugh but that doesn't last too long because I quickly remember her question and blush out of embarrassment before plastering on my smile as bright and as real as I can make it look without over doing it.

"Yes ma'am, I am" I reply making sure that my voice doesn't waver or sound weak. "Well I bet he must be very proud to have his very own daughter in the games, come on everybody! Lets give a big round of applause to our newest tribute!" Effie thrills clapping her hands wildly as her seeming excited fuchsia eyes rank over the large crowd in the town square, waiting for anyone to clap but to my surprise no one claps. Not even the ones holding betting slips. I know they must be in shock hell I know I am. They probably no doubt thought that there was no way for the small rich mayors daughter to get picked, but here I am, the female tribute from district twelve for the hunger games. I'm going to die on live television and all these people who are now looking at me will see me die while there lives go on, well until next reaping when yet again two more children will get sent off to die.

I can't help but grit my jaw as I take in the assortment of different expressions that are filtered through out the square. Some people are actually looking more happy then I know they should since they don't know me, but just what they imagine of me and I know that is mostly … okay, always bad. Others look a mixture of shocked, regretful, and relieved while I stand here numb and keep spacing out inside my own head "huh, maybe I'm already going crazy" I think biting at my bottom lip as Effie's heels click against the wood of the stage with each step she takes to the boys bowl "But more excitement to come! It's time to choose our boy tribute!" I watch as her hand dips into the large bowl that contains five slips with Peeta's name on it, six slips with Rye's name on it, seven slips with Bannock's name on it, and god only knows how may of Gale Hawthorne's name shows up in that bowl. "Please not the Mellark's or Gale" I think on repeat holding my breath as Effie makes her way back to the podium which I still stand near without thinking I quickly step up to the microphone knowing I need to somehow even from the start look like a contestants so I will possibly have sponsors. With a quick lick of my lips I get out "I'm going to make my father and district proud" in a determined voice. Its quite surprising how strong and steady my voice is since on the inside I'm quivering in fear.

Every one just stares at me and I know a few of them probably now think I'm crazy and no doubt the first one that will die. My eyes meet with gray eyes. The same gray eyes that usually hold so much hate are filled with confusion, regret, and pity that I quickly avert his eyes and find both Katniss and Delly who are obviously in shock that someone they know well is going to be slaughtered as they watch. I don't have time to search for the three boys I grew up with because two things happen all at once. The first being Haymitch storms over to me, knocking his chair over as he does. The second is he drunkenly slams into Effie sending her and himself to the ground, causing her cotton candy pink wig to become askew on top of her head. I can't help but laugh lightly, biting on my lip so no one will hear. My laugh quickly is dowsed with reality as Haymitch gets to his feet then looks at me like he some times does, like I'm his dead district partner. Between him and my mother I'm surprised I don't go around acting as if I am Maysilee instead of Madge.

Before I know it and rather quickly I might add, Haymitch makes his way towards me and the podium. "Please not today" I think on repeat as he continues to make his way towards me, not deterring his drunken stride. Haymitch takes a look at me then turns to look straight ahead at the crowd before us, "look at her. Look at this one!" he hollers, throwing his arm around my shoulders then pulling me close to him. I try not to scrunch my nose from the intense smell of alcohol that comes off Haymitch in waves. If I didn't know Haymitch like I do I think I would be very surprised with how strong he is for such a train wreck. "I like her!" his breath reeks of liquor and it smells as if its been a long time since he's bathed. "She's go lots of..." He can't think of the word for a while. "Spark!" he says triumphantly. "More than you!" he releases me and starts for the front of the stage. "More than you!" he shouts pointing directly into the camera.

I'm not too sure if he's addressing the audience or if he's so drunk he might actually be taunting the Capital. I'll never know because just as he's opening his mouth to continue, he plummets off the stage and knocks himself unconscious. "And the award for best godfather is?" I sarcastically think staring at his still form. He might be disgusting at times and a drunk but I'm grateful for him. Not just because he looks after me and talks to me when I have no one to, but he's effortlessly gotten every camera trained on him, I have just enough time to release a small shaky breath before composing myself and placing my hands down at my sides as stare off into the distance, wishing more than anything that I could just disappear out into those woods like Gale and Katniss but know I'll never get the chance now that I'm going into the games.

Haymitch is whisked away on a stretcher, and Effie Trinket is trying to get the ball rolling again. "What an exciting day!" she squeals with delight but I can tell she's still upset over Haymitch bulldozing her down. "Umm Effie" I whisper causing her to glance at me, giving me a pleasant smile. I as discreetly as I can motion towards her wig which is completely slouching to one side. With a comical look of mortification Effie straightens her wig then smiles brightly as she holds the small white slip, which will have the district twelve's male tribute. "But more excitement to come! Its time to see which lucky young man gets the honor to represent twelve besides Margaret here" Effie says gesturing slight towards me as she tries to move as little as possible, probably so her wig won't fall off. I want to tell her that I like being called Madge but I can't, my voice is stuck in my throat and all that is going through my head I please don't be any of my friends … or even the very rude and brooding Gale Hawthorne.

The crowd draws in a collective breath and I swear you could hear a pin drop. Effie unfolds the slip of paper in her hands and smiles down at it before calling out the name. "Rory Hawthorne." For a minute I'm so relieved it isn't Peeta, Rye, Bran, or even Gale but then I process the name through my head and feel physically ill. Rory Hawthorne is just a small gangly twelve year old boy who just so happens to be Gale's little brother. I watch with wide eyes and a slack jaw as I watch every one around Rory move back from him, making a opening that leads straight towards thee stage "I'm going to die trying to save him" I the first thing I think as I watch the obviously frightened boy with only one slip to his name, walk towards the stage. The odds aren't in either of our favors. Because Rory is moving too slow for the two Peacekeepers at the bottom of the steps that lead up to the stage, they each grab one of Rory's forearms forcefully an start pulling him faster towards the stage. That one thing seems to have a domino effect. First the air is filled with a very loud and strangled cry of a small girl, who I spot in Hazel Hawthorne's arms. They both look on the verge of tears but the small dark haired girl in her arms can't possibly know what is about to happen to her older brother since she's only five. Second Rory seems to grasp what is happening and his eyes look around as if some help will magically show up. And the third and the fourth thing happen at once, I move forwards absentmindedly as the two Peacekeepers rather roughly shove Rory onto the stage. He stumbles slightly then freezes up but that doesn't stop me form pulling the small frightened boy into a hug. He just tenses at first then I feel what feels like tears start to absorb into the shoulder area of my dress as Rory clutches to me tightly as his breathing starts to become erratic. "Your going to be fine I promise" I breath lowly for only him to hear. I don't know if I'm lying to both Rory and myself or if maybe in some way I'll be able to save this small boy and send him home to spend the rest of his life in the lavish reward you get after winning the games.

"Rory!" we both hear being shouted out from the crowd in front of us and my chest constricts as my eyes lock on the tall frame of Gale Hawthorne who is now wildly making his way to the stage with an almost vicious look on his handsome face. I know what he's about to do and if I was in his place I would volunteer for my little sibling as well but that doesn't stop me from fearing him killing me. How comical would that be? To die by the guy you hopelessly like and maybe even love.

This is something district twelve hasn't had in a long time, a volunteer. The rule is that once a tributes name has been pulled from the ball, another eligible boy can volunteer and the same goes for the girls. You would take there place in the games. In some districts its an honor to go into the games, people are so eager that I've actually seen a few of them in past reaping get into physical fights for who gets to be the tributes for their district. But in district twelve, where the word tribute is pretty much the same as corpse. Volunteers from here are all but extinct … besides Gale Hawthorne.

"Lovely!" says Effie Trinket. "But I believe there's a small matter in introducing the reaping winner and then asking for volunteers, and if one does come forth then we, um…" she trails off, unsure herself as she glances back at my father for some guidance of what to do. My fathers gaze on me doesn't waver but I can't look at him as he looks at me like it's the last time he'll see me alive, but maybe it will be. "What does it matter?" my father says. He's looking at me with a pained expression on his face. He doesn't look at me like I'm the quiet sixteen year old I am, but instead the small precocious and too overly curious child I use to be. "What does it matter?" he repeats gruffly. "Let him come forward." I can feel Rory start to shake and start crying more, no doubt over the fact his older brother is going to be taking his place for him in the games. He mumbles what sounds like a repeat of "no" as his fingers grip me tighter. I can see Gale bounding up the steps towards us so immediately pull back from Rory, who looks at me with bleary tear rimmed eyes that are slightly red. I smile at him then look up into his gray eyes that look so much more kinder than his older brothers. "Your so tall" I find myself whispering, causing Rory to chuckle watery from my random statement, with my hands on his shoulders holding him at arms length I make sure he's staring into my eyes before I say "Rory go find your mom, okay. Gale's going to be fine. He's going to be home before you know it" is all I can get out before Gale pulls Rory from me as he pins me with an icy glare "go find mom now Rory" Gale grits out as he pushes his younger brother towards the stage steps. Gale stands next to me like how I wish I could myself stand. Tall, strong, determined, and angry while I know I probably come off as a small scared girl from town who has the pretty, expensive dresses and nice ribbons to tie into my blond hair. I vaguely hear Effie ask Gale if Rory was his brother which he grits out a "yes" before refusing to speak. "Well bravo!" gushes Effie. "That's the spirit of the games!" she adds on with a wide smile. Effie tries once more to get an applause, but this time for Gale, but like everyone did for me no one claps but instead something else entirely happens. One by one I see the people of district twelve start kissing there three middle fingers of their left hands and hold them out to Gale. It is an old and rarely used gesture of our district, occasionally seen at funerals. It means thanks, it means admiration, it means goodbye to someone you love.

I don't pay any attention to when my father begins reading the long and very dull Treaty of Treasons, and before I know it he's motioning to Gale and I to shake hands. His hands are solid, calloused, and warm. Gale looks me right in the eye and gives my hand what I hope to be a reassuring squeeze. Maybe it was just a spasm. We turn back to face the crowd as the anthem of Panem plays. I sneak a peek at Gale taking in his sullen expression and making a small prayer that one of the other twenty-two tributes kills me instead of him. But then again the odds haven't been in my favor for a while now.

The moment the anthem ends, we are taken into custody. Its not like they handcuff us but they might as well since they circle around Gale and I then march us through the front door of the Justice Building. Maybe in the past tributes tried to escape. I've never seen that happen though. Once inside, I'm herded to a room and left alone. It's a rich looking room like one of the ones in my house, with thick, soft carpets, and velvety furniture. When I take a seat on the couch I can't help but run my fingers over the fabric of it, like I do at home. It helps to calm me as well as get my thoughts together and come up with whatever game pane is needed. Usually that would be how to entertain the Capital guest when they visit or on occasion how to keep the grotesque slimy Capital men from trying to sneak into my bedroom at night. I try to prepare myself for the hour I get to say goodbye to my loved ones. I know I'll be sitting here for a large part of it alone since I don't have too many friend or family. I know my mother won't come and I'm starting to think Katniss won't either since Gale is more her friend than I ever will be. They have years of hunting together while I only have from seventh to eleventh grade of sitting next to Katniss quietly eating our lunches or partnering up with her because no one else wants to work with us. It hurts thinking about how so swiftly my friendship with her has vanished and all because she has to pick which friend she cares about more and wants to come home. "Maybe she will come though," I think as I start worrying my bottom lip. I can't afford to get upset and cry because when I leave this room every one would know how weak I am from the puffy red rimmed eyes that comes with crying. There will be even more cameras at the train station when we are seen off.

My first visitor is of course my father. I immediately get up from the couch then throw myself into his arms and or a minute we say nothing, just cling to each other tightly knowing this might be the last time we see each other in living breathing person. Then I pull back from him because if I continue to let my father hug me like he is I'm going to break and cry. I lick my lips and nod absentmindedly to myself before I start spouting off things that he needs to do, since I'm not going to be around to do it. My father isn't under any circumstances allowed to let my mother watch anything to do with the games, he needs to keep buying strawberries from Katniss and make sure to still pay Gale's part since he won't be able to take care of his family from the games. Maybe invite the Hawthorne's over for a dinner or two to watching the tribute parade and maybe even the interviews the day before the actual games begin. Give all my dresses to Posy Hawthorne along with my hair ribbons and give the dresses that are too big for her to Primrose Everdeen along with a few ribbons as well. Give my drawling and painting supplies to Peeta because god knows his mother won't buy him any. Give my books to Darius and split my small collection of games between Rye and Bannock. "And when Gale gets home give him…" I trial off seeing the looks of a parent devastated of the loss of their child shining in his eyes which makes my throat thick with emotion since it sounds like I've already given up.

I stare at my shoes for a second before looking back up my father "I'm not giving up … just getting rid of things I don't need right now." I try to say but I know that's not that better than what I was doing before hand so I give my dad a smile before saying "I'm going to fight as hard as I can to come back … but …. But if it comes down to Gale and me … I'm not going to kill him. "I would rather die" I think as I watch the strong man I've known all my life tear up. He grabs my shoulders and holds me at arms length away as he looks at me until he's sure he has my full attention, "I'll do all that if you promise me two things" he bargains, looking from one of my eyes to the other. I nod once in agreement then wait for him to continue, which he does after a small beat. "You fight your damn ass out there and if it comes to…" He trails off, his eyes closing with the thought of my death most likely flashing in his head. "If it comes to the worst you have to promise me you will find a peaceful way to get out. You stay away from any one from district one, two, three, four, and eight you hear me. there are worst things in that damn arena than getting done in by someone or even one of the mutts" he tries to convey with all his power and I feel sick think he means raping or something to that extent but when he says "a pretty girl like yourself won't just get killed off like the rest, they'll get what they can from you then kill you off slowly." I know my thoughts of rape are possible and it has my skin crawling with disgust. Its not enough that I have to out last twenty-three other people trying to kill me but now I find out that I have to stop some disgusting savage career from one of the favorited districts.

My father pulls me in for another hug but before too long the door to the room is pulled open and a Peacekeeper steps in and awkwardly tells my father his times up as he looks every where but at us. For a minute I can tell my father is going to object and state that he's the mayor and deserves more time with me but I quickly cut in and remind him that he can't hog all my time since I have a few other people waiting to visit which makes him nod then give me one last hug and kiss before he walks out of the room with the Peacekeeper. I already know in my heart that I can't win the games, and probably so does everyone else. The competition will be far beyond my ability to play the piano. Kids from wealthier districts, where winning is a huge honor, who've been training their who lives for this. Boys who are two or three times my size. Girls who are capable of killing me twenty different ways with a knife, not caring that I'm a person like them. I know there are going to be weak people like myself going into the games as well but we'll be the warmup killing. They'll weed us out before start taking down each other until there is one lone victor. And I can't help but hoe that one victor will be Gale since his family need him and so does Katniss.

I sit back down on the couch lost in my own thought, that I don't hear or even see the door open and someone walk in until I'm being hugged tightly in strong arms with the scent of apples wafting into my nose. I smile into the crook of Peeta's neck hugging him just as tight he hugs me. "You can do this Madgie I know you can" Peeta says, his voice heavy with sadness as he tightens his grip on me. I feel numb and I guess that maybe that's a good thing since at least I'm not crying yet. I let Peeta mumble on about how I'm smart enough and how I'm a fast learner of things, not because I need to hear him but because I know he needs to say them. I'm surprised when Peeta pulls back from me then gives me a very un-Peeta venomous glare, the kind I'm use to getting from Gale and not my best friend. Dark stormy blue eyes search my much lighter eyes as he straightens out my golden pin on my dress before once again looking at me, "don't you fucking give up already okay! You can't do that to me. You have to fight Madge, don't just lay down and die. You have to at least try, if you at least try then I won't be mad at you if you … Here's what you need to Madge, you need to get lot and lots of sponsors. You know how they work you've been around them enough to know how to act, and you one hell of a talker Madgie. Almost as persuasive as me, use that too. Then when you train, you train hard. You learn as much as you can" Peeta puts forth not deterring his intense gaze.

I look down and shake my head, unable to remove the frown that takes place on my face. "What about Gale? Do I kill him or wait for someone else to do it? I couldn't live with myself if I did anything to hurt him. He has a family and a life to come back to Peter rabbit and I don't. My dads never around, he's always at the Justice Building and my mom … my mom is barely staying alive as it is and she doesn't even know who I am Peeta. I have nothing here. I love you and you know I'll at least try, I'm not one to go down without a fight … I'm just not sure how long that fight will keep me alive in the games. You'll be fine, I promise. You'll forget about me enough to move on plus you have a ton of friends at school Pete." I get out in a rush, staring over his shoulder at the door so I won't have to see the hurt and deceit that I know are in his eyes. "You have to promise you'll talk to Katniss and let her know how you feel, if not for you then for me … please." Peeta clenches his jaw then steps back from me "don't" he breaths looking at me with watery eyes before giving up on trying to talk me into changing my mind since we both know he would be the same if he were in my position with Katniss.

Peeta and I spend the last few minutes of our visiting time dancing together while Peeta hums lowly, just like we use to do when we were little. Before we grew up and had no time to enjoy the little things like that instead having to take on more duties than we should have to. When a Peacekeeper comes to get Peeta we don't say anything at all just stare at each other for a second before Peeta ducks down and kisses my cheek then whispers quietly into my ear "Katniss may always hold my heart but Madge, you hold the very thing that is me." Then he leaves. I don't make it back over to the couch before the door is being opened and in rushes Rye, Bannock, and Mr. Mellark. All of who are wearing sorrowful expressions. Rye's the first to rush to me and pull me into a bone crunching hug not even pretending like he isn't crying, "I was going to ask you marry me at the Harvest festival this year" Rye say pulling back to stare at me. His confession is both heartwarming and frightening. Heartwarming because I've never had anyone like me like Rye has and that he chose me out of all the girls in the district who try to get his attention. Frightening because I'm just sixteen and I don't want to be thinking about marriage until I'm out of high school, not that it matters now though. "I would have said yes" I reply with a small sad smile, I'm not to sure if what I'm saying is true or if I'm just saying it for him but the large watery smile that breaks across his face makes me glad I said it.

"Don't hog her Rye" Ban says teasingly making me smile at him, he always tries to make any situation better even with how bad the can some times be. Rye chuckles watery before giving me a chaste kiss that makes us both blush from his father and brothers gaze before he wipes his eyes on his shirts sleeve then steps back from me so his brother can give me a hug. "You worry about you and I'll make sure to keep my two knuckle head brothers in place. You can win Madgie if you just try" Ban whispers to me before pulling back and giving me a warm smile. I look over to Mr. Mellark and give him a small smile that he returns before pulling me into a hug. Mr. Mellark is a quiet man who rarely speaks but when he does its always with such inspirational and much needed words of wisdom so when he tells me "the game starts when you walk out of this room" I'm immediately all ears waiting for whatever he has to tell me. "You're a fighter just like your aunt May was and if I was a betting man I would put money on you making it to the end … but that is if you believe in yourself enough to get there" I nod my head vigorously "I'll make sure to keep an eye on your old man while your away sweetheart" he says with glossy eyes and I know its because he looks at me like I'm one of his kids even if its not by blood so it comes to no surprise to me when he breaths "you do hat you need to in there, just know we know that its different in there and that no matter what you will still be the same old Madge to us." Before Peeta's brothers and father are ushered out of the room, Rye quickly unclasps his necklace then places it around my neck before giving me one last look over, like I might disappear. And we have no idea in the least if I will during these games. I could very well die.

Delly comes to visit next. She's a crying mess and I find myself comforting her instead of her comforting me but I'm use to being the more nurturing one of us, while Delly's the energetic girly girl. Next is a large surprise. I stand frozen watching Gale's family walk into my room, I feel as if maybe I should tell them that Gale's room is next door but I can see the tear tracks on their faces so I stay quiet, waiting for one of them to voice why they are here but before anyone can say anything Rory bounds over to me in three long strides before pulling me into his arms. And unlike the last time I hugged him, he's the one comforting me and I can't help but tremble slightly as a shaky breath falls from my lips "I made Gale promise not to kill you" Rory voices after we break apart from our hug. I let out a unusual genuine laugh that makes them look at me like I'm crazy but I can't help it. Knowing that Gale's younger brother made him promise not to kill a girl e despises. "We'll see if he keeps his promise" I think then instantly feel guilty even though no one but myself knows what I just thought. "She's so pretty mama. Is she going on an adventure with Gale?" Posy chirps excitedly while struggling to get out of her mothers arms until Hazel gives up on trying to contain her and places her on to the ground, where she wastes no time at all before running up to me and hugging my leg, giving me a large toothy smile. "I was sad that Gale is going away but he said he would bring me back lots of presents" gush the five year old who is still blissfully unaware that her brother isn't going away for an adventure or even a vacation but to some arena to fight for his life against twenty-three other kids, myself included.

"Posy let go of Madge's let its rude" Gale's youngest brother mumble sheepishly as his cheeks turn red once I give him a smile. I think his name is Vick but I can't remember if that's the name I remember Gale calling him. "It's fine. Not very often do I get suck a pretty girl fussing over me" I tease giving Vick a playful wink as I extract Posy from around my leg. Posy looks beyond floored that I think she's pretty. I duck down then with deft fingers reach up to my hair and untie my ribbon, I glance over at Hazel asking her silently if its okay to give her daughter my ribbon and the stiff watery nod lets me know it is. So with a large smile I turn back to Posy then show her my ribbon which makes her little gray eyes widen in surprise "I want you to watch over this for me, okay? I don't want some sneaky girl trying to take it from me" I stage whisper. Posy nods wildly, causing her dark hair to fly around her shoulders and fling into her face, causing my heart to swell with warmness at her pure happiness. "I can do that. I'll watch it with my life" she vows solemnly. Giving me her what I can only guess is her most serious face as she thrusts her pinky out towards me which I quickly link with mine then give it a shake. "I don't mind if you wear it in your hair while I'm away. In fact I think it's a must with such pretty hair you have" "mama did you hear her? She thinks I have pretty hair" Posy practically shouts with excitement looking over at her mom and causing us all to laugh. "Your hairs not to only thing pretty" Hazel smile as her daughter, "not as pretty as Miss. Madge" Posy makes known with a mater of fact nod that makes me smile "can I tell you a secret?" I stage whispers once again causing Posy to take on her serious voice as she bobs her head up and down. I lean in towards her and whisper "I think your more prettier than me" which makes her eyes as big a saucers and just as she turns to tell her mother no doubt what I told her I place my finger to my lips playfully making her mumble a quiet "I almost forgot I made a promise."

I gently yet quickly tie my pink ribbon into Posy's hair just like I had in my hair only minutes ago, after Posy pleading me to make her pretty hair look like mine/ then I sit next to her while looking over at her mother who watches her intently then the door open and a Peacekeeper says times up, but before they leave Hazel crosses over to me and give me a warm motherly hug that I haven't received from my own mother since I was eight. So I almost let myself cry knowing I won't be able to see my mother one last time as Madge and not her dead sister she can't seem to get over. "you look so much like your mother" she starts before going quiet and leting go of me even though I secretly wish to just stay a little longer in her warm motherly hug. Hazel's warm gray eyes stare into my distant blue eyes, "Thank you for showing my son so much compassion even though my oldest son has been nothing but mean to you. Thank you so much Madge, it means a lot to my family … I made sure Gale won't harm you while you away" she says, adding on the last part at Posy's scrunched up face, as she tries to think of why Gale would hurt me. I just nod then watch them go, then once again its just me and I can't help but want Katniss to come see me, if Gale's own family can come visit me even though Gale's going into the hunger games with me, then why can't she?

But she doesn't come and I can't hide the fact that I makes my chest constrict slightly, thinking we were better friend than her to not even see me one last time even if it was just to say she would miss my quiet company. I would have if the rules were reversed and it was her and Peeta. I'm lead out of the back of the Justice Building with Gale and Effie as well as a couple Peacekeepers accompanying us to a flashy black car that drives us to the train station, which will take us to the capital in a day.

Gale and I don't talk. He doesn't look at me let alone notices my existence but that doesn't stop me from sneaking glances at him. Making sure I have his facial features burnt into my mind even though I'm absolutely sure they have been since I was ten. In no time at all we pull up to the station and we're being herded to the platform then forced to stand next to each other as our picture is snapped a few thousand times from the dozens of cameramen surrounding us and only after that are we allowed onto the train.

Margaret dear follow me, I'll show you to your compartment while Avox shows Gale to his." Effie beams looking at me but before I can even quietly mumble out that I actually like to be called Madge, someone else does. "She doesn't like to be called that. She likes to be called Madge" Gale grits out giving Effie cold glare, that I'm all to use to. Then without a glance my way he storms off on his own into the next car of the train. I offer Effie an apologetic smile and mumble "he's not normally like that" even though I know its not true. Effie grins at me and states how presses I am and that she hopes I'm the one who wins between Gale and me before leading me to the room I'll be staying in, while on the train. I know that Effie doesn't mean what she said in a rude way, how can she? All the people like her in the Capital are practically as smart as a small child.


	3. Chapter 3 Strategy And Stylists

*Author note- Sorry for posting so late but I was sadly busy today so didn't get too much time to write. Thank you for all of you for reading my fanfiction, you guys have no idea how happy it makes me seeing you all take time from your life to read through my little story here. Once again thank you, you guys are great! Please feel free to review and give me your thoughts or whatever, I'd be more than happy to hear from you all :) just remember this is my first fanfiction so try to be a little gentle lol. Please forgive me for any errors I missed and enjoy your read. -007twihunger xoxo

**_Chapter Three: Strategy And Stylists_**

I sit on the bed in my train compartment just watching as the woods fly by the window, going by so fast that they look like a continuous green blur. I don't move from my spot until its darker outside and that's only because I can't see anything anymore. I sluggishly get up then make my way into the ensuite before disrobing and getting into the shower and very quickly washing up then I get out, not wasting my time to fawn over all the riches we get on this train that even I don't get to experience in district twelve. When I walk back into the room I notice a pair of nice pink silk pajamas that I numbly slip into, not caring that the cold material feels good against my pale skin. I quickly fix my hair into a bun at the top of my head then pin my aunts mockingjay pin to my pajama shirt before slowly pulling on Rye's necklace and tucking it inside of my shirt. I walk to the compartment door finally deciding to leave to explore or something so I can get my mind off the hunger games or the many ways I could die in it, but before I can even unlock then open the door I'm startled by the too cheery knock I know has to belong to Effie Trinket, and I'm not wrong when I hear her voice state cheerily "Madge dear! Its time for supper," without stalling anymore time from the inevitable, I make my way out of my compartment and follow Effie who is now decked out from head to toe in a canary yellow outfit down the hallway towards the dining car. Her dress is a laced canary yellow that has a high collar and tiny bumble bees everywhere on it while a rather large bumble bee is pinned into her now yellow wig. She has bumble bees the size of a shooting marble hanging off her black earrings while her sky high, high heels are a steady striped pattern of yellow and black.

"I like your outfit Effie" I say with a smile, causing her to look back at me with a large smile of her own. "Oh thank you my dear. I'm so thankful I've finally got an actual person this year to work with instead of all those savage vile ones that have no manners. I tell you they eat with their hands, like they we're out in the wild" Effie puts forth shaking her head before turning to open the compartment door in front of her. I know that Effie can't help but think like she does but its really not her fault, its just how the Capital people like her are. They are use to everyone being so prim and proper not to mention the outlandishly bright and vibrant outfits they all wear. But that doesn't stop me form scowling slightly before quickly catching myself and plastering a smile on my face in its place.

The dining car is large, which is not that big of a surprise to me since I've been on Capital trains before, on trips with my father when I was younger and he use to travel to different districts for meetings and such. But now everything is more electronic, so now we don't leave the district at all. There are so many choices of food to choose from that its almost comical, that and the amount of it that I know will get thrown out after we've eaten our fill. There's everything from roast to finger sandwiches to platters of different fruits and vegetables, basically anything you can think of are placed on plates adorning the table and two small banquet tables off to the side of the dining table. Effie and I are the only ones in the dining car besides two Avox's who stand quietly against the back wall with there faces pointed towards the ground as they wait to be asked to assist one of us. I quietly pick the seat closest to a window before I start placing food on my plate as an Avox pours Effie and myself some champagne after Effie silently motions towards our champagne flutes then towards the champagne bottle, which makes me silently fume. We don't have Avoxes at my house, like some other mayors families in different districts do but I'm well aware what they are and how shitty they get treated. Avoxes are people who were found guilty of some type of treasonous crime, then forced to wait on Capital people as well as have their tongues severed from their mouths. When the red headed Avox girl begins filling my glass I can't help but whisper out a small "thank you" making the Avox stare at me stunned before she remember her place and quickly dropping her gaze then even faster sets down the bottle of champagne before rushing back over to the wall where she once again takes her previous stance, staring at the floor. "No need to waste politeness with the help my dear" Effie puts forth giving my hand a small pat before raising her champagne flute to her lips and taking a small sip. "They enjoy serving us" Effie adds on seeing my small frown which I quickly hide away, then duck my head to force a bite of salad into my mouth.

I only have to bear Effie's lone company for a couple minutes longer before a freshly showered Gale stalks into the room, taking the seat the furthest away from me as his own, then he begins brooding at his placemat before releasing a annoyed sigh. A second later he starts piling food onto a plate then grabbing a silver can out of a small cooler, that I know is a soda which I'm pretty sure Gale's never had before. So I can't help but watch him from underneath my eyelashes, watching as he examines the can then hesitantly pulls the tab up releasing the all too familiar hiss and pop, which causes him to startle slightly and cause me to snicker under my breath. But the hard glare he sends my way makes it die in my throat abruptly before I'm once again quietly staring at my plate as I silently start feeding myself small bites, not wanting to eat but knowing I have to keep my strength up since I'm going to be starving once in the hunger games.

The room is silent besides the clanks of our utensils on our plates and the soft thud of our drinks being set back down on the table. I let the silence go on for a little while longer before finally looking towards Effie and asking "where's Haymitch? He is supposed to be giving us advice," trying my hardest to not look at Gale as I feel his gaze burn into me. "I assume passed out in his compartment" Gale mutters under his breath but Effie and I pay no attention to him. "The last time I saw him, he said he was going to take a nap, and frankly I don't blame him. Today has been very exhausting!" Effie says. I think she's more relieved with Haymitch's absence than she lets on and really who could blame her?

We're thrown into a long silence again as we finish our meals. When the meals over, I fight to keep my food down. I can see that Gale is looking a little green as well. Neither of our stomachs are used to such rich fare. But if I can hold down Mrs. Mellark's weekly Friday meatloaf then I'm determined to hold down this food.

We go to the next compartment to watch the recap of the reaping's across Panem. They try to show them through out the day so a person could consecutively watch the whole thing live, but really only the people in the Capital can really do that, since none of them have to attend reaping's themselves. One by one, we see the reaping's, the names called, the volunteers stepping forward or, more often not. We examine the faces of the kids who will be our competition. A few of them stand out in my mind. A large bear of a boy, who lunges forward to volunteer in district two and his district partner, a short slender brunet who beats the other girl volunteer unconscious just so she can be the district twos female tribute. A shaggy blond haired boy with bright green eyes from district four who looks to be fourteen or so. The girl form district five, who has red hair and reminds me of a fox. The boy with a crippled foot from ten that looks younger than he actually is. Another bear of a boy who reminds me of Gale with his brooding from district eleven. And lastly the one that stands out the most, the small twelve year old girl who reminds me a lot of Katniss's little sister, Primrose. Well besides the fact that her hair and skin are darker. When her name is called she mounts the stage, then they ask for volunteers and all you can hear is the whistling of the wind. My stomach turns as I stare at the small girl because all I can think about is Prim. Thru the week I usually help out over at the elementary school, since I both like it and am expected to be more involved with my district, being thee mayors daughter and all. Prim is one of the few kids I help tutor. She is the complete opposite of Katniss. Prim is quiet but very talkative if your willing to listen. Her long blond hair and blue eyes make her look more like my little sister than Katniss's, since Prim obviously got more of there mothers genes while Kat got her fathers gray eyes and brown hair. My stomach turns again thinking this time about Katniss, "wonder if she regrets not coming to see me?" I think, finding it harder than not to believe that she was actually even my real friend. "Maybe she just felt bad for me" pops into my head but before I can delve further on that thought because next is district twelves reaping.

I watch silently as my names called. How everyone quickly steps away from me then how I walk up to the stage, looking shy even though I was frighten and I guess that's better than people knowing how scared I actually was since that would have mad me look weak. Haymitch falling off the stage, which gets comical groans. Rory's name being called and how I immediately take on the role of his protector. Then Gale volunteers. The commentators aren't to sure what to say about the crowds refusal to applaud. The silent salute gale gets. Claudius Templeton states that district twelve has always been a little backwards in him somehow booming yet shrill voice. Then him and Caesar Flickerman prat on about what an honor and a first it is, having an officials child in the games, about how interesting it should be. Gale and I shake hands then the anthem is being played again and the program ends.

Effie is disgruntled by being embarrassed publically by our drunken victor and how her wig kept almost falling off her head. "Your mentor has a lot of learn about presentation and what behavior he should use while being televised." Effie sympathetically says earning a surprisingly smirk from not only me but Gale as well. Gale laughs and I'm caught off guard by the sound, "he was drunk. He drinks every year" "Everyday" I can't help but add on getting a small smirk from Gale. Its funny how Effie makes it sound like Haymitch has somewhat rough manors that she could help iron out but I've known him a lot longer and know that he's like that almost all the time. With the exception, of how he acts around me sometimes. "Well yes," Effie hisses without any distain in her voice. "How odd you two find it amusing. You know your mentor is your lifeline to the world in these games. The one who advises you, gets your sponsors lined up, and dictates the presentation of your gifts. Haymitch can very well be the difference between your life and death!" Just then Haymitch stumbles into the compartment. "Did I miss dinner?" he says in a slur, his eyes then come to rest on me before he vomits all over Effie's expensive shoes as well as the expensive carpet before passing out in the mess. "So laugh away!" Effie says, hopping in her pointy shoes trying to not get them anymore dirty than they already are as she makes her way out of the compartment, most likely to clean herself up.

For a few minutes Gale and I just stare at the scene before us, our now a little more lucid mentor tries to get himself out of his own vomit, with no avail. Gale and I exchange a glance. Obviously Haymitch isn't much, but Effie's right about one thing, once we're in that arena he's all we've got. I look at Gale one more time before ducking my head and getting up. With quick steps I make my way over to my godfather before crouching down to help him up, grabbing one of his arms as Haymitch tries to help me get him up from the floor. When I do manage to get Haymitch to his feet he turns to me and frowns "I tripped?" he asks then crinkles his nose as I nod and states in a disgusted slur "it smells bad." He wipes his hands with his face, smearing his vomit on his face. "Lets get you back to your room, okay?" I breath, giving him a small smile that silently tell him its okay and I don't blame him for getting even more plastered than he normally does. Because it is, I look so much like my aunt May who Haymitch watched die and now I'm going into the games just like her. And just like her I will probably die as well. "We'll get you all cleaned up and I'll have an Avox bring you some food" I say more to myself as Haymitch turns his head away from me so he's not looking at me, no doubt his mind is swimming with May's death then thinking about what might happen to me.

"Already sucking up Undersee" I hear Gale mumble to himself behind me before I release a defeated sigh I look over to Gale "could you please help me? He's rather heavy." I get out in a weak voice, not really expecting anything more from Gale than a 'fuck off' before he left me with my godfather. But I'm pleasantly surprised when Gale releases a low sigh before getting to his feet and grabbing Haymitch's other arm and begins walking towards the door of the compartment, not giving me as much as a second glance. We practically carry the whole way to his compartment because he passes out again. Once we reach Haymitch's compartment we just stand there for a little bit, since we can't really set him down to sleep in his clean bed for it too to be soiled. "I got this princess. Why don't you go get some sleep" Gale murmurs not looking at me, his words are tinged with the normal annoyance and anger but also something that sounds like exhaustion. I look at him and give him an appreciative smile before ducking my head into a quick nod, then leave them alone. I walk through the compartments on my way to the one that I will be sleeping in tonight and immediately stop seeing an Avox walking from the dining cart with some cleaning products, and even though it makes me feel disgusted with myself I stop walking then say "my district partner needs help. He's in Haymitch's compartment trying to clean him up" making sure I'm loud enough for him to hear me, and the subtle jerk of his head tells me he did.

When I finally manage to get back to my compartment the train has stopped at a platform to refill. I don't make it to the bed instead I stand with my back to the door, letting todays events fill my head and since I'm alone and no one can see me I finally let myself cry. Its slow at first just silent tears streaming down my cheeks until it becomes too much to try and manage. I release a shaky breath as I let my body go slack them plop to the ground roughly, not caring if I get hurt. Almost immediately I pull my knees to my chest clutching them tightly to myself as I burry my face into my knees, trying to contain the noise. I don't know how long I sit there on the ground but I do know is that I cry myself to sleep.

My eyes hurt when I wake up but other than that I'm completely numb. I think my body and mind have already decided to give up. Back when it was just Gale and me it was easy to tell myself and others I wouldn't give up, that I would fight as hard and long as I could knowing I still wouldn't be the victor at the end of the games. But now that I've seen the other contestants, I know there's not that big of a percentage of me making it past the first day let alone to the top. I lay still not moving anything but my eyes as I stare at the ceiling of my compartment, thinking about who will come to my funeral. The main two I keep coming back to are Gale and Katniss though. Trying to decide if either of them would come, Katniss because I had thought we were friends and Gale because we're district partners. I shift slightly and take in the softness beneath me that feels way too soft to be the carpet, then quickly sit up realizing someone put me into bed and covered me up. Just as I start worrying about why someone was even in my compartment there is a annoyingly too chipper musical knock at my door followed by Effie's voice "up, up, up! Its going to be another big, big, big day!" before I hear her hills click down the hall until I hear her knock at Gale's door and tell him the same.

I don't change out the pajamas I wore to bed yesterday because I'm comfortable and warm. I want to spend what time I do have on this train as Madge, not me acting like Maysilee for Haymitch and my sick mother or the quiet mayors daughter Margaret. No today at least for a little bit I'm just Madge, just me.

I walk towards the dining car, rather slowly I might add. I contemplate looking out the window to see where we are but I decide not to, knowing we'll be in the Capital soon as it is anyway. As I walk into the dining car, Effie brushes past me in her purple feather puff looking outfit as she curses Haymitch under her breath as she stirs her drink. My eyes immediately find Haymitch, his eyes are puffy and red from last night's drinking binge. He looks annoyed while Gale who sits across from him looks sullen. Without wasting anymore time I quickly snag the same chair I sat in last night for supper, the one near the window. Just as I sit down I'm served a large plate of food. Bacon and eggs, toast, ham, and hash browns. Not to mention the large assortment of fruit that is placed in front of me along with a strawberry-banana smoothie. We eat in a more comfortable silence than the one Gale and I had with Effie last night for supper. I feel anything but hungry but I know I have to at least try so I sip at some water and take tiny bites of the cut up bits of strawberries on my plate. I glance up and notice Gale looking into his mug with a furrowed brow, which grasps my attention. I watch as he sets the mug down and only then do I recognize the familiar substance in the mug, hot chocolate. "Its called hot chocolate" I blurt out before I can stop myself, Gale looks up at me blankly then its like it sets in who I am and once again he's glaring at me. A defeated sigh passes through my lips as I drop my eyes to my plate "its good" I add on weakly not rising my gaze for my still full plate before I force myself to pop a small piece of banana into my mouth for something to do.

When my stomach can't bear to take in anymore food I push my plate away from me then sit back and just absentmindedly looking around the room and more times than not I am glancing at Gale. He's on his second cup of hot chocolate trying to act like he doesn't enjoy it but I catch the continuous amazement and delight that flashes through his eyes as he drinks it. Haymitch is shooting back some substance from a silver flask and I can only guess its of the alcohol family, and hasn't touched his food much. No wonder no tributes from district twelve ever make it. It isn't that saying that solely he is the cause of this but sadly he does play a contributing part in it. As I stare at my godfather I feel a serge of disbelief that he's not even trying to give Gale any advice for the games, so when I here Gale grit out "so, what advice are you going to give and when?" I don't really blame him for getting upset this once, because in a few day we will be in the hunger games. Trying to stay alive with the odds stacked against us, we're from the poorest district so that already writes off a lot of peoples interest "but Gale did volunteer for Rory" I think and hope blooms in my chest as I realize maybe he has caught some peoples interest form his sacrifice for his brother. "Here's some advice. Stay alive," Haymitch says saluting Gale with his flask before moving it back to his lips.

"That's so funny!" I lash out, not even attempting to hold back my glare that I send to my godfather as I stand up from my seat, slamming my hands on top of the table effectively gaining both Gale and Haymitch's attention. My palms hurt from smashing some unseen glass on the table but I pay it no mind, instead I reach forward and slap the flask from his hand sending it crashing against the wall then comes to rest on the floor. "Only, its not to us. Its great and all that you want to piss away you life but don't cut our chances short when we want to fucking live!" I yell, shaking with anger but not at Haymitch but about everything in general. Everything that I didn't get out from crying myself asleep last night is thrown in my anger at something that could talked about civilly. Then everything goes even more south real fast. I see a haze pass throughout Haymitch's eyes that I've seen on the very rare occasions he has flashbacks to his games. Then the next thing I know I'm being slammed into the wall behind me as my mentor and godfather roughly wraps his hands around my throat and starts squeezing. I'm immediately frighten and clawing at his hands not taking in Gale, who runs towards us then tackles Haymitch to the ground before punching him as I rush towards them. "Stop, Gale please stop!" I shriek as I yank at the back of Gale's white shirt, trying to stop the tears I feel brimming my eyes. After Gale punched Haymitch, our mentor started laughing making Gale move away from him. I'm not sure if h means to place himself in front of me or if it just happens but I think I'll let myself at least pretend he at least doesn't want me to get killed in front of him. Haymitch shakes his head as he gets to his feet then swipe at the blood dripping out of his nose not paying it any attention instead he looks at us like we're under his inspection. His eyes linger on me then drop to my neck before his eyes offer up his apologize so I weakly try to pull the corners of my mouth into a smile, without much avail.

"Well, well, well did I actually get consistence?" Haymitch asks no one in particular as a gleam passes through his eyes and he smiles at us. I look down at Gale's hands and see him clenching then unclenching them and that lets me see that three knuckles on his right hand are slightly tore and bleeding. Without any though I let out a "oh no your hurt" before yanking up one of the pristine white cotton napkins before placing chunks of ice into it and wrap it so it won't fall out then I rush back to Gale and force his hand in mine while I nurse it, holding the ice package I made, to his hand gently. "Thanks Undersee" Gale grumbles out awkwardly taking his hand back from me and as I go to offer him the ice pack Haymitch says "no, let them bruise. The crowd will eat it up. They'll thing you had a go at it with another tribute." "That's against the rules" I reply furrowing my eyebrows. "Only, if you get caught. Those cuts and bruises say you fought and your smart enough to not get caught." Haymitch says then turns and picks up a knife and hands it to Gale, "can you hit anything with his?" Gale just takes the steak knife turning it over in this hand before looking at the wall in front of him before he quickly jerks his hand back then forward, sending the knife into the paneled wall, in between two panels. And this earns a smirk from both Gale and Haymitch. But when my godfathers eyes land on me his smirk vanishes, "what about you sweetheart. Can you throw a knife?" he asks me as he strides across the room to retrieve the knife, then walking back to me to offer me the knife, which I don't take.

Haymitch releases an annoyed sigh then sets the knife down on to the table before gesturing to the middle of the room then to Gale and myself, stating "stand so I can have a good look at you two." We silently obey, and he circles us. Checking our muscles and examining our faces. "Well, I guess I could work with you. Your not entirely hopeless, especially after the stylists get a hold of you, you'll be attractive enough." Gale and I don't reply because even though the hunger games aren't a beauty contest, the more attractive people tend to pull the most sponsors. "Alright I'll make a deal with you two. You two don't intervene with my drinking and I'll sober up enough to help you, but you have to do everything I say. What do you say?" Its not too much to ask for, for what he's offering up so we both nod, me because I need to make sure Gale goes home. I've already decided. He's the one I'm going to try my hardest to get Haymitch to help while in the games, but that still leaves me to figure out to make this brooding boy likeable to the type of people he despises "this should be fun" I think sarcastically.

"So help us," I prompt, not giving him the chance not to give us some advice for the games, "yeah. When we get into the arena, should we go for the cornucopia or…?" Gale says but gets cut off by Haymitch holding his hand up and halting him. "One thing at a time, in a few minutes we'll be pulling into the station. You'll be put into the hands of your stylists. You're not going to like what they do to you. But no matter what it is, don't resist," says Haymitch as he picks a glass bottle of alcohol then heads for the door, "wait. But…" I start then get cut off by Haymitch "no buts. Don't resist," he butts in giving me a stern look before quickly exiting the dining compartment. Just as the doors close behind him the room goes dark besides the few faint lights in the room, and I instantly know with a heart sinking certainty that we're in the tunnel that takes us through the mountain to the Capital. Its practically impossible for you to enter into the Capital any other way and I think that has to do with the further thought of a possible rebellion attack, that I don't think will ever happen. Not after what happened to district thirteen.

Gale and I still stand next to each other, silently as we speed through the tunnel. Then suddenly the train begins to slow and the light comes back bright. And even if we wanted to we couldn't stop ourselves as we walk over to the window to see what we've only seen on the television. Everything is bright and loud, begging for your attentions from the television/lampposts to the buildings in weird shapes. We see people smiling as our slow passing train goes by, as if we weren't going to be prepped for slaughter. Then I remember we need people to like us to get sponsors so immediately I place my beaming mayors daughter smile on my face as I wave at them, like I'm so excited to be here which makes them, more than not wave back at me with large colorful smiles of their own. Out of my peripheral vision I see Gale look on at me with disgust making me quickly look at him "one of them could be a very rich sponsor" I make known before turning back towards the window to smile and wave, and to my everlasting surprise when Gale steps closer to the window by me and starts waving with a smile even though his gray eyes are smoldering.

Haymitch wasn't kidding when he said we'd be rushed off to our stylists once we stopped. That's exactly what happened, right when that train stopped and that door opened we were being herded in different directions. I'm lead into a overly white room that has what looks like glass furniture. I'm not in the room more than five seconds before the door opens and three very Capital people enter the room with me, two girls and a guy. Venia has aqua blue hair and gold tattooed on eyebrows, Octavia is a plump woman who has pale pea green skin, and Flavius has orange corkscrew hair and dark purple lipstick.

They strip me down then pluck the hair they deem must go, which isn't that much since being the mayors daughter I have to look my best all the time. But still that doesn't make it hurt any less. After I'm doing having my hair ripped from my body, Octavia rubs some calming mint lotion to my red skin, stating "your hair is so beautiful! Is it naturally that blond?" in a ungodly high pitch voice, sounding more excited than she probably should be over my hair but then I think about how they watch twenty-four kids fight to the death for entertainment and instantly I put my game face back on and smile, "yeah" I grin shyly, testing out if I still have my natural charm I usually do, since now I'm in a completely different situation, instead of being the mayors of district twelves pretty well-mannered daughter. And by the way they all gush over me some more and I start complementing them I can tell I still haven't lost my touch and that alone makes me happy since I'm going to need my charm if I'm going to get Gale home, somehow.

I'm next gave a bath and for the first time since I was a baby I'm not washing myself and this alone makes me humiliated as I watch them take in my 'much plumper body than their use to working with' which is how Flavius explains his wander eyes that stray to my more intimate parts more than a handful of times which has me feeling sick to my stomach. Then next I'm being dried and having my hair trimmed up and my nails filed and stripped of any of the gray fingernail polish I had painted on only days ago because it reminded me of a certain seam boy, all the while I'm wear a barely there thing satin white robe that only reaches mid thigh. My nails and hair don't take anytime at all as well since I'm already well groomed. After there done with me they address me to take the rob back off and wait for my stylist Cinna to come in, so I had smiled and gave them my overly thanks for helping me feel pretty because I usually don't get such great help to get read in district twelve, and that wins them over even more before they depart leaving me in my birthday suit waiting for some Capital stylist and might I add another man, who will see me naked.

I don't have to wait too long before Cinna walks into the room. Cinna doesn't look anything like the normal Capital stylist you see on TV, the only thing remotely Capital about him is his gold eyeliner on his top eyelids. He has short cropped brown hair that looks natural and green eyes that seem to only be heightened from his eyeliner, he is wearing just a simple black shirt and pants, nothing that is so over the top like I'm use from seeing with the Capital guest who sometimes stay at out house back in district twelve. "Hello, Margaret. I'm your stylist, Cinna." He says in a quiet sounding nothing like a Capital person in the least. "Hello … I like to be called Madge" I say warily as I try to keep myself from shaking and blushing from embarrassment and I see that Cinna notices. He gives me a kind reassuring smile then says "alright Madge, just give me a moment, okay?" I nod mutely as a knot forms in my throat as Cinna begins waling around me appraising me carefully, not touching me but looking my body over thoroughly. "You can put the robe back on and then we'll have a little chat" he puts forth, coming to stand in front of me once again as I practically jerk the small piece of fabric around myself, covering me up more thoroughly but only by so much. Cinna leads me over to a table where we sit, unlike everything else in this room, this table is almost the only thing in this room that isn't made of glass which is instead made out of a rich, beautiful slab of wood.

I casually run my fingers against the smooth surface of the table as Cinna presses a button and what I'm guessing is our lunch, which arrive from a hidden panel that gently spits them out to us. Cinna pours us each some strawberry flavored champagne that tastes surprisingly good and has a three small raspberries in it. I've had my fair share of wines but never enough to get drunk of tipsy but just a small glassful to be respectful to who ever offered it to me. So it surprises me when I ask for another glass which I sip slowly on not wanting it to go to my head too fast since I'm not at all use to drinking. "Your new, aren't you. I haven't seen you around before" I say politely after dabbing at my lips with my napkin before setting it back down in my lap before I take a bite of the rich and well cooked steak in front of me, which has a side dish of a mixed blend of carrots and cauliflower. With a rather large side, of very cheesy looking noodles. "Yes, its my first year in the games" he replies as I take another drink of my champagne then ask "did you pick district twelve or appointed it?" with over curiosity, which is kind of is pushing past politeness. But Cinna just smiles at me then informs me "I picked twelve" before we both go quiet and begin eating. After a few minutes of silence I catch Cinna looking at me, so I place my utensils down to pay attention to him, since he looks like he has something to say, "you must think we're despicable" Cinna states, not even beginning to act as if he might be wrong. I'm so startled by his words that I just stare at him blankly, feeling very surprised then I quickly I try to reply but Cinna just hold his hand up stopping me before he gives me a smile "anyway Madge, about your costume for the opening ceremonies, my partner Portia, who is the stylist for your fellow tribute, Gale. Our current thought is to dress you two in complementary costumes," he says. I lick my lips absentmindedly as I listen intently to everything he says, praying to god we won't be naked like the tribute a few years back were. They had coal dust sprinkled all over there bare bodies, not really covering anything at all.

"As you know it is customary to reflect the flavor of the district" Cinna puts forth folding his hands together in front of him on top of the table, "so, I'll be a coalminer?" I venture, knowing full well I could be dressed just as skimpy like the girls from district one and two, like they are every year. I silently pray it will be decently modest. "Not exactly, you see. Portia and I think the coalminer is overdone. No one will remember you in that. And we both see it as our job to make sure that the district twelve tributes are unforgettable." I look at him, waiting for more information on my costume I'll be forced to prance around in. Its taking almost everything in me to not immediately jump to the conclusion that I'm most likely going to be sexed up, I mean Cinna seems like a nice person so maybe I still have hope on my side at least for this one small thing. "So rather than focus on the mining itself, we're going to focus more on the coal." "Great I'm going to be naked in front of all Panem only lightly dusted with coal dust as I stand next to Gale, who will also be naked, great." I think, feeling like I might actually puke, as my mind starts to swirl from the champagne, "maybe I shouldn't have drank them so fast." I think, my fingers grasping the napkin in my lap until my knuckles turn white. But before I actually toss my cookies I hear Cinna state "and what do we do with coal? We burn it. Your not afraid of fire, now are you Madge?" a knowing twinkle in his eyes as I stare wide eyed at him not knowing what to expect.


	4. Chapter 4 The Tribute Parade

*Author note- I'm actually so overjoyed that I've had so many people read my fanfiction its mind-blowing. Thank you guys so much you guys and gals are the best! Like always please review, I hope you enjoy, and forgive the errors I've missed :) -007twihunger xoxo

**_Chapter Four: The Tribute Parade_**

Before I know it, it's a few hours later and I'm dressed in what will either be the most sensational or deadliest costume in the ceremonies. I'm in simple black unitard that covers me from ankle to neck, hugging my body tightly. Shiny leather black boots, that are laced up to my knees. But it's the fluttering cape made of streams of yellow, orange, and red and the matching headpiece that defines this costume. Cinna plans to light them on fire when our chariot rolls down the street. I had wanted to throw a fit and tell Cinna no when I found out he wanted to light me on fire but I knew I couldn't because of what Haymitch told me, and the fact that I'm not use to being rude to anyone besides Gale. Cinna had seen my fear in my eyes though, then he had just smiled kindly at me and said "It's not real fire, just synthetic. You and Gale will be fine." Before he got to working on me, and the only thing I could do was pray he was right and that I wouldn't die before the games. But I guess accidentally dying by a fiery outfit would be slightly better than being slaughtered by some blood hungry tribute I'm forced to compete against while in the arena.

My face is practically void of makeup, just highlighting key points of my face, here and there. My hair has been brushed out and left down at my shoulder in its usual natural golden waves. "Why aren't I more glammed up like they usually do?" I pounder to myself as I stare into the mirror as Cinna touches up my hair and makeup, "because I want the viewers to be able to recognize you when your in the arena" Cinna replies dreamily "Madge the girl who was on fire." I stare at Cinna's reflection in the mirror, taking in his kind face and gentle green eyes that have flecks of gold in them. He seems calm, gentle, and completely normal, but then he gets that spark in his eyes as he talks about lighting me on fire and I can't help but think he reminds me of a madman, well only partly. After Cinna dubs I'm ready, only then do we go down to where all the tributes will wait for the ceremony to start.

I can't help but feel slightly relived seeing Gale in the same outfit as me. Maybe its horrible of me but at least if I go down in a burning mess during this chariot ride I'm glad I'll have someone with me, but then I think of sweet Posy. Of the Rory and little Vick, how he's a large part of there lives. How he's the one who practically take care of them with the exception of his mother. "Who knows long they would last without him" I think as I worry my bottom lip, watching as Portia goes over to Gale and starts touching up his costume, making sure everything is in its rightful place. I don't miss the warm smile Gale gives Portia or the laugh that follows it, but I do try to ignore the part of me that hopelessly likes Gale and wish he would look at me just once like that. "Who are you kidding you love him" a small voice in my head pipes up making me frown even more then physically have to turn myself away from Gale, so I'll stop staring longingly at him like a creep. So instead I force myself to just take in everything since I know I only have at most a few days before I'm dead and forgotten.

Cinna is talking with my prep team and is shortly joined by Portia and Gale's prep team, while Haymitch walks over to talk to Gale. I glance around the room at the other tributes who are like us, in costumes but unlike us a lot of them are horrendous and more revealing than not. I'm not paying attention enough to them enough to know what district they are from or even who they are because all my mind keeps coming back to is that I wish I was home. Just as I turn to look at the horses I flinch seeing the male tribute of district two, who is smiling at me. "Margaret, right?" he asks, giving me a leering smile as his blue eyes takes in my skintight costume, I swallow feeling sick under his scrutiny but manage to plaster a fake smile on and say "please call me Madge," even though I don't want to but I know I have to because if I'm anything but nice with him then he'll be purposely going after me and the way he smiles at me and his eyes trail up to my face I know he'll do to me what my father, Haymitch, and I all fear. "Cato, district two." Cato makes known offering me his large hand, which I hesitantly shake with my own much smaller hand. Cato let's go of my hand after the handshake reaches its end, he looks at my face then reaches forward and tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear making my skin crawl and my eyes subconsciously widen excessively. "I wanted to come over and offer you a one time deal personal invitation to join the careers, you'll make it a lot longer if you have friends in the arena" he says as he pulls back from me, giving me a questionable look that looks stuck in the middle, between menacing and hungry. But it doesn't matter because both of them would have had the same reaction as I do know, I pale not knowing what I can say to not get killed and what I don't want to say like 'okay, I'll join you guys' I feel sick and wish I was anywhere but here. With anyone but him but I'm not, I'm with him here and now. I open my mouth then close it before opening it again and squeak out "I…" but before I can get any further I feel rather than hear someone come up behind me to stand. The only indication I had on the person behind me is only because the whoosh of air that blew at the nape of my neck and that alone tells me that my silent savior is Gale Hawthorne.

Ever so swiftly I turn on my heels then slam face forward into Gale's strong chest, his hands jerk out to my hips to steady me before he gently drops them back to his sides as our eyes meet. Gale's gray eyes swiftly look behind me, no doubt to Cato. And for once his anger isn't targeted at me. His eyes seem even more angered than normal I notice as I stare at his face for a few more second, I turn around and give Cato an apologetic smile. Still trying to be nice to him, Cato looks from Gale to me then outs forth "we'll talk later Madge" giving me a wink before he turns around and struts off towards where his small district partner stands and glares at me causing me to swallow thickly. Feeling as if my plan already backfired, seeing the visible disdain she already has for me. "You okay?" Gale's gruff voice asks from behind me, making me flinch and look away from the small fierce female tribute of two, to look at Gale. "Yeah, thanks" I reply. He looks at me intently, like one would if they were trying to tell if your telling the truth and this takes me back slightly "why would he care if I'm okay?" I think frowning at Gale with furrowed brows "because your from home" Gale replies making me widen my eyes and blush from not realized I said my thought out loud. Before either of us can say anything more Effie hurries over to us, complaining that we need to stick to the schedule and get into our chariot since the ceremony is about to start.

Gale's strides are much larger than ours so he makes it over to the chariot than I do. He effortlessly steps up into the chariot then takes me by surprise as he turns back to me and offers me a hand, which I take. With probably more force than he should use he helps me into the chariot next to him causing me to stumble forward almost tripping over the front of the chariot. Thankfully Gale yanks me into his side stopping the process. I breathily whisper out a "thank you" before I begrudgingly let go of his warm calloused hand. We're thrust into a strained silence. I'm hyperaware of him standing but a few inches from myself, but not knowing what to say to him. My eyes fall on the two black horses that are tethered, to our chariot. The horses they have for the ceremony are very obedient so they don't need anyone to lead them. Just get them started and they'll fallow the right path, they were taught.

The anthem begins to blare making my stomach turn in fright as the first chariot starts moving out. The district one tributes are in sheer tunics that have jewels embedded all over it. You can hear the loud roars of approval and loud claps for district one that only seem to grow as the next chariot pulls out, another Capital favorite, district two. I find that the more I pay attention to what's going on around me, the more I'm racked with nerves so I turn to Gale and force myself to ask him "Where's Haymitch?" as my eyes come up empty on trying to find our mentor. Gale looks over at me then looks to where he last saw Haymitch, with our prep teams and stylists. "Probably off to go get drunk. I guess he had no advice to give us" "Probably a good thing with the fire. You probably don't want someone so flammable, so close to the flames" I say and then my eyes meet Gales and we both start laughing and the strain between us is gone. After we've calmed down from our bust of laughter, I offer Gale a genuine smile, which he surprisingly returns making my heart beat somehow fast yet slow at the same time as well as my breath to catch in my throat. "His face looks so much different when he smiles" I think as I stare into his grey eyes that are now somehow softened towards me just some. A blush creeps onto my cheeks as I realize I'm just staring at him and he's staring right back at me. I drop my head slightly, to both break our stare as well as to suck in some much needed air to clear my clouded thoughts about what it would feel like to have Gale look at me like he looks at Katniss and maybe even kiss me like I've hear a lot of girls talk about, from what they say he is a remarkable kisser. I shake my head to clear my head before I look back to Gale and blurt out "what do you think about the fire?" trying to act as if I wasn't just staring at him for no reason. Gale glances at me states "you rip my cape off, I'll rip yours off" which gains a small smile from both of us as I say "Yes."

Before I know it district eleven is heading out and next is our turn, I swallow thickly then startled as I hear Cinna's voice from behind us, saying "here we go then" before he climbs up into the chariot in between Gale and myself to light first our headdresses then our capes. I stiffen, afraid to feel the burn of the flame but all I feel is like a strange tickling, licking at my skin. Cinna's kind eyes find mine and he offers me a smile as he releases a relieved sigh then says "they work" while tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear before raising my chin so I'm looking at him "they're going to love you! Remember heads held high and to smile" he informs. Cinna jumps down from the chariot and has one last idea that he shouts at me but with the crowd and the music so loud I don't hear him and as I glance over at Gale I can tell he can't either, but it had looked like he said 'hold hands' so I quickly suck in a breath before hesitantly grabbing Gales hand then intertwining our fingers as I stare at Cinna. He smiles approvingly at me nodding. Gale jerks his hand form mine and furrows his eyebrows, looking at me in confusion making me feel even smaller next to him. "Cinna want's us to hold hands" I lamely put forth, feeling like its met on deaf ears. I look away form him as our chariot starts moving out and Gale's hand quickly finds mine, interlacing his fingers with mine. I give his hand a squeeze of what I hope passes through as comfort and it must because I'm met with a matching squeeze to my hand before we're rolling out in front of everyone.

The crowd is initially alarmed by our costumes but not before long they are cheering and screeching, and its for us. Cinna was right they do love us. I smile widely waving my free hand and like he's taking my lead I see out of my peripheral that Gale does the same. I remember how on the year Finnick Odair was in the games how he had blown kisses at the crowd and they had went crazy, so I take one form his book and begin blowing kisses to the crowd. Just how I thought it would be, they go absolutely crazy. Trying to catch my kisses as if they could, blowing kisses of there own. I catch sight of Gale and myself in one of the television/lamppost and am rendered speechless. We look amazing, "Gale just might have a shot" I think. Without thinking anything other than really wanting to sell Gale more to these people, I thrust our intertwined hand into the air for all to see then I breath a sigh of relief as the crowd scream and cheer louder, letting everyone know they love it. Our chariot follows the others around the loop of the City Circle then come to stop right outside the President's mansion. Everyone continues to scream and cheer for a little while latter, and I smile in glee hearing that the cheers are mainly for us. Slowly the cheers die down until there nothing at all and only then des the doors to the balcony open, and President Snow walk out.

The President starts giving a lengthy speech but I can't focus on what he says because I'm taking note of how many times the camera keeps cutting to Gale and me, and something like dread pools in my stomach, fearing the wrath that's probably aimed at us now, since I know that President Snow doesn't like to be ignored, and the darker its getting, its getting harder to look at anything but us. After Snow's speech they play the anthem again then parade us around the loop again before we disappear into the Training Center. The doors have barely closed before we're engulfed in our prep teams, who are excitedly rambles on with our praise unintelligibly. My eyes wander then pause seeing all the hatful glares we're getting thrown by other tributes making me realize that yes I may have helped Gale and myself but by doing that I've also panted a large target sign on our foreheads. My attention is jerk back to where I actually am as Gale's hand is yanked from my own, leaving me feel slightly numb with sadness that I quickly mask as Cinna help me out of the chariot, and Portia helps Gale down. Then they're carefully taking off our still flaming headdresses and capes before extinguishing them with a fire extinguisher.

I realize that even though Gale and I are no longer holding hands we are in fact standing really close together. With a small flush of my face I take a small step back from him, which causes him to look at me, "thanks for holding my hand up there" I offer up weakly not knowing what else I should say. Gale gives me a smile "no problem. I kind of got a little shaky up there, you with the crowd and all" he said rubbing the back of his neck. I try to not smile too widely about how cute Gale looks when he's embarrassed, but the ache in my cheeks tells me I'm not winning that battle. "You couldn't tell, you were on fire" I grin at my pun which makes Gale smirk then chuckle shaking his head "yeah. I was, wasn't I" Gale says feigning shock with wide eyes and a slack jaw. I can't help but laugh at him then slap at his arm, like I'm use to do to the Mellark boys so its kind of like a reflex but it makes Gale smile. "This is great I mean aside for getting a target on you back you have so many sponsors lined up no doubt after that." I gush excitedly before my words even register to my brain and the scowl that Gale he doesn't miss that my words are about him and nothing to do with me. "You mean us" he says not looking away from me. His gaze is intense and I don't know why but I don't even try to hide my game plan from him, "I've already accepted my fate Gale, so I'm going to use what time I do have left on something important like getting you home to your family … and Katniss" I reveal in a monotone, not exactly sure if I'm glad I told him or not.

But when I'm met by the fierce fiery glare from Gale, I do. "You've already given up? What the hell is wrong with you Undersee? Your just going to lay down and die like your…" I don't let him go any further as my hand flings forward so fast and slaps him hard across the face "don't you say shit about my mother you seam rat" I grit out and say the first insult that I know will strike a nerve. I know its petty, but I'm not going to go through my last few days having Gale berate my mother and father. With that I turn on my heels and stop off towards the elevator. Effie stops me as she sees me moving towards the elevator shouting out to me "Madge dear! Just press the twelve button!" I just nod clenching my jaw before entering an empty elevator and jabbing my finger roughly at the lit up number twelve. The Training Center is designed so the basement level of the building is the built in gym then each floor from that are floors where each district pair will be staying before the games. First is district then so on until district twelve, which is dead last and places on the top floor. I don't want to talk to anyone I just want to scream and be mad so I decide to create my own stress relief environment. I ask an Avox to get me some steak knifes which she does then I'm stomping off to the room she points out as my own. I toss knife after knife at the wall above the bed getting more and more accurate with steak knife I let loose. But that doesn't stop my anger which is starting to go south real fast, threatening to fill me with sadness thinking about my sick mother back home. About if she somehow woke up and decided to watch TV and then she sees me in the games just like Maysilee and what if it was on a day where I died? A lump takes place in my throat as I let the lone knife I do have left in my hand fall from my fingers and bounce under the bed. A strangled cry sounds in my throat as I think about what I honestly thought would happen if my mom had to see someone she loved died in these games again. She'd no doubt kill herself. I drop to the ground as tears prick my eyes and shudders wrack my body from that thought alone.

I end up curled up in a ball thinking about what my father would do if he lost both my mother and me, would he too do himself in? Suddenly its so hot and I can't breath, and I'm pulling and yanking at my unitard trying to get it off me, which is miraculously hard to do in my frantic state. I don't know when I start emitting hysterical cries through the room as I continue to fight with my costume but I do and this alone must be why I'm quickly being held still as someone hushes me rubbing my hair down my back. I don't care that I'm not sure who it is or even how pathetic I look I just cling to them letting my tears and screams run there course because I won't get to grieve for them when the inevitable happens. I'm going to die in these stupid games without living it to my seventeenth birthday or before I get to really experience life and because I'm grieving for all the children going to die for the Capitals sick twisted pleasure and it makes me sick. I let myself cry until there is nothing left.

I sit hugging my unknown comforter before closing my aching eyes then finally taking in the faint scent of alcohol and rest my head on my godfathers shoulder as I mumble "there going to all die for no reason. I'm going t die for no reason" in a hoarse voice not caring that my throat is demanding water, "here sweetheart take this" Haymitch replies, ignoring my words like they won't even spoken. He slowly eases away from me then hands me a small orange pill that I let him drop into my palm, "what is this?" I question in a monotone staring at the small pill that kind of reminds me of this slightly similar pill we have back in district twelve that are used for sleep, but those are by far smaller "Capital size dosage of a sleeping pill," he grunts. I pop the pill into my mouth then say "I need to wash it down," Haymitch hands me his silver flask offering up an apologetic look but I ignore it and quickly take a swig to get to pill back then I let Haymitch help me into bed and not even a minute later I'm fast asleep.

I wake up feeling refreshed and wide awake but my eyes are sore and my throat is dry and scratchy form the fit I had last night. I feel embarrassed about the way I acted as I get out of bed slowly then pad over to the bathroom where I quickly strip then get into the shower, leting the hot water release the tension in my muscles. By the time I get out of the shower, the water is ice cold and there is a musical knock at my door and I just know Effie's say what a big, big, big day we're going to have which makes me roll my eyes. Laid out on the bed is a red, black, and gray looking training clothes that has a number twelve on the back of it. I get dressed quickly not liking the cold air against my wet skin. Once I'm dressed, I pull on the simple black socks and sneakers left at the foot of the bed before pulling my wet hair out of my face and into a high ponytail then I'm heading out the door, but I don't get that far since Gale is waiting for me and stops me as soon as he spots me "what?" I ask numbly not wanting any kind of his harsh words this early. "Look Undersee I'm sorry. I had no right to say what I did, I just got so angry that you were … never mind that now. Just know I'm truly sorry" he gets out in almost one big breath making me slightly impressed that he's able to speak this much I bob my head once offering up my own apology "its fine we both got a little heated. I'm sorry as well. I had no right hitting you like I did" he stares at me and gives his head its own jerk before we're both quiet and walking into the living room then the dining room.

Effie and Haymitch are already sitting at the table eating and to my surprise they're not fighting. Then I take in Haymitch's clear eyes and offer him a warm smile that he returns but I note it doesn't meet his eyes. "Madge dear how are you feeling?" Effie chirps, her purple lips pulled down in a frown as she looks at me "I told her about how you weren't feeling well" Gale grunts before looing down at his plate and begin to eat the food he piled onto it so I follow suit while giving Effie a winning smile "yes, very much so. Just a twenty-four hour bug I think" she nods giving her sympathy and with that she begins to talk about how great our entrance was and how she's sure we'll have plenty sponsors lined up and that reminds me of the talk I need to have with Haymitch later. Even thought Gale, Haymitch, and myself aren't overly enthralled like she is over the opening ceremony praise we're getting from the Capital, we do offer up some grunts of agreement and small one answered replies.

Once our plates are cleared away Haymitch claps his hands together "okay. What skills do you two have for that will help in your favor?" he questions looking from Gale to me but it seems as if the look he gives Gale is just for show. I glare at him then quickly put forth "Gale hunts! He knows how to use bows and knifes. He can make snares. He's smart and already use to fighting," Gale looks at me strangely and so does Effie and Haymitch. "Well Undersee can talk like them. She's smart and pretty … things they like. She was on the track team a few years back but stopped to help out at the elementary so she's really…" Gale gets out in a rush before trailing off as his eyes meet mine. I'm not surprised that I know so much about him since I've liked him since forever but I am shocked about the things he knows about me since he hates me, right?

Before I can even attempt to ask how Gales knows about that stuff Haymitch butts in "alright now we got it established that you tow know each other why don't we discuss more strategy, you asked me to be stay sober to help you and I am don't make me regret this. In training I want you two stick to each others side no exceptions, stay away from things your good at or just don't fully show your skill at it. Don't show off at all! Save that kind of shit for when your evaluated in a few days." He says rather annoyed before getting up and snatching a bottle of alcohol off the counter before disappearing down the hall. "Well at least that was some advice" Effie grins like its an accomplishment and I guess in a way it is so I just smile. "Hey Madge, can I talk to you?" Gale questions awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck as he looked away from me, "yeah sure." I nod getting up as he does then I follow him out of the room and into another before jogging up some stairs and out onto the Training Center's roof.

Its so bright out that it makes me forget about the cold October weather we were having in district twelve before we left. Gale and I are both quiet just staring at the large buildings out in front of us. "You can't even jump off if you wanted to off yourself before the games, they want that to wait until there's cameras." Gale tells me, picking up a rock then chucking it off the roof and down bellow. But after a few seconds the rock ricochet back up to us and plops to our feet. I wait for Gale to say more but he doesn't he just sinks to the ground and lays in the small grass patch that was connected to a small garden. And I think its his way of actually trying to be nice to me, so I just lay down next to him and watch the clouds slowly pass over head, its calm and comfortable but that quickly changes when Gale tells me "You know I kissed Katniss before I left. Told her how much I loved her … its kind of sad to think me having to volunteer for my brother for the games to was what it took to get me to admit it to her." His words hang in the air and there bittersweet. Sweet because Gale and Katniss are finally together and bitter because I'm in love with him and my heart is breaking. I can't even think how Peeta must feel because what I'm feeling hurts and I've just come to grasp for my love of Gale while he excepted it at age five.


	5. Chapter 5 Training and Confessions

*Author note- Wow! well shit we've made it to chapter five you guys :) wait ago guys with the viewing :) this means so much to me that you guys are actually reading this. Like, fuck just wow! Thank you tremendously for your wasted time because this means the world to me. You guys keep me writing. Sorry I didn't get too much written today. And as always I hope you enjoy, please review, and sorry for any errors I've made -007twihunger xoxo

**_Chapter Five: Training and Confessions_**

Each and every decision we make has an outcome which can either be good or bad, so even though I want to ask Gale why Katniss and not me, I don't. Not because I know it will start a fight but because I know it wouldn't change the fact I'm going to die and that I don't want Gale to feel guilty about that, plus it doesn't hurt that I actually really care for both the seam kids who obviously could careless about some silly mayors daughter who hasn't had to suffer like them. But even that can't stop my feelings from bleeding out silently inside me. I bit my bottom lip to stop it from trembling as I feel my eyes begin to water making me have to sit up quickly, trying to prevent it as I try to think of a way to leave, to go nurse my wounded heart alone. But nothing comes to mind besides the fact that Katniss has won again. I feel angry at myself for even having slightly bitter feelings towards my once friend just because of some guy "yeah but she's the who casted me aside like trash" the bitter part of me thinks, making me feel even worst about the position I find myself in. I don't hear when Gale sits up beside me or that he even asked me anything until I feel his heavy hand on my shoulder and like that the dam inside me bursts, threatening to take every last frustration out on the one person near me, Gale Hawthorne. The sole cause of most of my life problems.

I jerk away from Gale like his touch is an open flame and I've just been burnt, then the next thing I know I'm up and on my feet standing looking at Gale who is now standing in front of me looking confused yet still has a flicker of anger in his stormy gray eyes that seem to gaze into my soul. "I'm so happy that you have that waiting for you" I say sarcastically making his thick eyebrows furrow and his lips form a thin line, "what the hells your problem Undersee?" Gale asks, his voice is lacking its normal anger and is instead filled with confusion. Like he really wants to know, so who am I to deny him that privilege?

I clench my jaw then turn so I'm looking at him straight on, ignoring how the sun catches him just right, making him look even more dreamy than I've ever seen him … well besides when he's smiling. My eyes snap shut and I clear my head feeling even more angry that I let myself almost get roped in by his looks to drop my wrongfully targeted rage at him. I know what I'm doing is wrong and that seems to make it even more wrong, that I know what I'm doing but I don't care because I want him to hurt like he's unknowingly made me hurt countless times. My hands ball into fists as my blond hair blows around my shoulders as a breeze blows by us. "Your my problem!" I screech, not caring that I'm openly crying even though I feel my tears rushing down my cheeks. "How am I your problem? I'm trying to be nice to you!" Gale yells back looking at me with disdain that seems like its barely being contained. "Everyone on our team is going to be fighting for you! There's no hope in me. I'm going to be dead right when that gong dings. Your going to win and go home to live your life while rot in the ground!" I seethe glaring at him shaking slightly, my fingers digging into my palms. Gale looks at me calculating before his face suddenly goes blank "did Katniss come to see you and tell you to get me out?" he questions, causing a pang in my stomach from the mention of Katniss and I'm even more mad, "Katniss didn't come to see me your family did idiot!" Once again we're having a glaring match then Gale grits out "yeah I'm an idiot because I'm from the seam, huh Undersee? You know I was beginning to think there for a minute we could have gotten to know each other, since we're both from twelve, but I guess a Capital bitch like you couldn't be forced to indulge my presence even if I am the only thing from home" Gale growls out giving me a disgusted look before stomping back into the Training Center making he scream loudly making my hands go to my hair and slightly yanking it.

Swiftly I throw my arms down then sick at the pillar in front of me, which just so happened to be made of a sturdy wood, this earns me a heated filled pain to my right foot. I ignore the throb in my foot as I pace around the rooftop muttering lowly to myself about things I don't mean and I don't care. Like how I hate Peeta for being stupid and liking Katniss who loves Gale. How I wish my mother cared more about me because then maybe then she'd get out of bed. How my father didn't even try to stop me from being taken. With each thought popping into my head, my anger starts to dissipate until its gone completely. I stop pacing and lay down in the grass staring up at the sky again wishing I had kept my fat mouth shut. Gale was going to give me a chance to get to know him and not the secondhand information I heard from other people. But then I remember he still would have told me he loved Katniss, "yeah and then I could have told him I love him only for him to laugh in my face" I think aloud, wincing as my hoarse, slightly cracking voice as it slices through the quiet air around me and making me feel even more alone than I already do. "So that's why your giving up, huh sweetheart?" I hear Haymitch's gruff voice behind me and startling me with his presence, I work myself up into a siting position to look at my mentor who has so very quickly switched into his godfather role that it almost gives me whiplash since I'm usually the only one he's nice to besides my mother and Peeta. Peeta can get anyone to like him. I just look at him not replying as I look guiltily at the ground knowing he's going to try and guilt trip me into being 'sane.'

I wait until Haymitch is leaning against one of the pillars before I release a sigh then look up at him. His eyes are angry and his hands are crossed over his chest grasping his biceps, "your going to throw away your whole life for some boy, who hates you? Come on Pearl don't be so stupid. Do you not care that all the people you'll be hurting, about your poor mother? I let Maysilee die but I'm not going to let you die!" his voice grows in volume towards the end then he like Gel is walking off but before he can get through the door I holler "well its already done. Don't waist your breath trying to change my mind, I'm already dead so start dealing with it Mr. Abernathy" I quickly get to my feet then run all the way back to my sleeping quarters not caring that my foot throbs with each stomp my foot makes. But just after I shut the door there's a sharp bubbly knock to the door followed by Effie's shrill voice "Madge dear, we need to start heading down to the training garage or we'll be late!" a groan whooshes from my lips before I'm turning around then walking back out into the hallway and walking towards the elevator where Gale and Haymitch already waits for us, both silently angry at me "great" I think as I watch Effie's bright orange fingernail press the red button that says training room.

The ride down to the training room is awkward but it is silent, so I guess there's that. I stand in the back of the elevator next to my fuming godfather while Gale, the guy I love stands in front of me with Effie to his left, so when the ding rings throughout the elevator telling us we've reached our destination Effie and Gale are the first ones out and if like just realizing I needed to breath I remember of what I told Haymitch on the roof, I quickly turn to face Haymitch and mutter "the roof" which Haymitch replies back "to windy" making me calm instantly giving him a nod before stepping out of the elevator after him. Effie and Haymitch offer their good lucks then their stepping back into the elevator, leaving us with still angry careers and everyone else. Gale and I are the last one's to arrive which makes me embarrassed as everyone's eyes follow us as we walk over towards the furthers from everyone but still close to be considered linked up with everyone else.

A tall athletic looking woman named Atala steps out in front of us all and begins to explain the training setup. Advisers at each skill station, we're free to go around to what stations we want. Some of the stations are for survival skills, others fighting techniques, and we're forbidden from any combative exercise with anyone but the designated assistance provided. Atala begins to read down a list of skills while my eyes wander around the room, taking in the other tributes since I can actually see them in person. My heart sinks seeing that I'm one of the smallest people and not just in stature either. The only people I'm bigger than is the male tribute form four and the female tribute of district 11. Then we're being dismissed and almost instantly the careers are showing off at the more physical station while all the other tributes go off on their own ways. "Where to first?" I ask turning to look at Gale, trying to act like we weren't just fighting only a few minutes ago, Gale looks at me for a little bit then looks around the room once "suppose we tie some knots," he says, I nod mutely then follow slightly behind Gale over to the knot typing station.

The station adviser looks slightly surprise by Gale and my presence but he quickly goes into descriptions of different types of knots and being who I am, I quickly get him talking to me but Gale doesn't talk to him at all just scowls at me as we work on the snares. Once the station adviser takes notice of Gale's obvious skill with knots does the scowl leave Gale's face as the adviser talks him through how to do some more complicated knot that will render a person hanging in the air by their leg, which Gale himself surprisingly teaches me how to do the more difficult knots that I struggle with. Next we move over to the camouflage station where I succeed and Gale stumble, and I myself have to help him which makes me smile inwardly as I watch his eyebrows furrow and mix some more berry juice into his mud and moss mixture under my close scrutiny, "how are you so good with this?" Gale asks suspiciously making me laugh out of annoyance, rolling my eyes. "My best friends a baker, I learned a few things form him. He does all the frosting at the bakery and sometimes I'll help him out" I say brightly, feeling cocky for being able to do something better than Gale. "Your going to do pretty go out there" Gale observes, applying more of his mixture to his hand before looking back up at me for confirmation, I look at it intently before nodding a few times with a pleased smile "yeah I'd do great if I could frost someone to death" I say sarcastically making Gale glance at me but he doesn't say anything and I'm thankful.

The next few days go by with Gale and myself staying attached at the hip as we work intently, trying to know each and every to the full extent and its actually fun to learn some of the things, like when Gale teaches me how to use a bow and arrow. Even though I'm not as good as him I'm pretty good for a beginner. While going through the stations I had made sure to talk to each of them intimately making them a little loose at the lips and a few of them mention a few key things like the arena we're going out into an I'm beginning to think it's a forest, but I'll have to make sure to run it by Haymitch later. Gale and I learn everything from how to build a shelter and how to tell which berries are good to eat to fighting techniques to using weapons in a fight. While we've been busy working on picking up on new traits and tactics The Gamemakers watch us taking in how we are working and how well we're doing it while the stations advisers write down in notebooks what we score when passing through their station, I only found that out as I got finished climbing one of the trees and had seen the adviser writing about me and gave me a seven, which was pretty good because it was after my second try at climbing.

Besides the training being hard so has having meals since it seems like everyone besides Effie is mad at me, so the meal time chatter is pretty strained. I've also have taken notice of the way the careers will be watching Gale and myself intently with some of the station. I find myself being even more thankful for Gale's presence when on the third day of training when I noticed that Cato kept sending glances my way, and when Gale noticed me noticing Cato he whisper in an annoyed voice that Cato had been doing that since we started training which made my heart want to bottom out. But whats even more unbearable than that is trying to make lunch with Gale bearable, how he just broods sending me occasionally glares and snarl my way, to the point of me awkwardly striking up a one sided conversation about the different bread in the basket in the middle of our table. I had explained which breads where from which district and he had looked at me like I was idiotic. While another day I had just prattle on about stupid mindless things until one day I bring up an old book my father has hidden in his office, that I'm not allowed to read even though I snuck it and did it anyway. My father would get in serious trouble if Snow ever found out my father had a book all about the Americas and how life was before Panem, which catches Gale's attention but he doesn't say anything so I soon move on to a new topic to talk about … well talk at Gale with.

One the fifth day Gale and I take notice of the small girl who reminds me of Primrose Everdeen, who follows us around. She's from district twelve and I think her name is Rue. My days are spent so alone that I feel like I'm going to end up going crazy from lack of communicating, because of just days on end of only getting Effie to talk is torture with all the mind numbing things she defends as important. I'm going to go crazy just like Annie Cresta from district four, she won the games because she was the only one who knew how to swim. She went crazy form seeing her district partner beheaded in front of her, but I think that would have messed anyone up, even just a little. I feel bad that thinking she's crazy because honestly if I made it out of the games I'd no doubt be worse off. Seeing people killed and having to kill people, then live to see it reoccur every night in your dreams, that would gnaw me alive until I did myself in.

Before I know it it's one on one evaluation, where we're looked over and scored for whatever we think will get us good enough scores to get sponsors. They have us lines against the wall on a long bench waiting for our one chance to impress the Gamemakers so they'll give us a decent score. We're lined up according to districts and that the male tributes are going first, so I'll be the last one to try and captivate the Gamemakers who have already sat through twenty-three other tributes attempt at wowing them. I shake my leg absentmindedly watching as the first tribute goes through the doors and the green light above the door to go from green to red. Everyone is moderately quiet, besides the careers who talk loudly with one another as if they we're best friend, acting like they weren't going to kill each other the first moment all the weaker tributes were dead. My stomach is in knots and my hands are sweaty from my nerves, I have no real talent to render anyone speechless so I know I'm most likely going to get a poor score, but I guess it really doesn't matter since I'm trying to make sure Gale's the one who goes home. Gale sits next to me and looks about ready to break my leg as he oozed annoyance, watching me bounce my leg up and down clenching his jaw so I begrudgingly stop my foot then start to try to count the tiled panels ion the ceiling which is rather not that nerve crunching in the least.

After a few minutes Gale mumbles he has to get a drink then gets up and walks over to the water fountain to get a drink and low and behold that's all it took to get Cato back over to me, which made me wish I had followed Gale instead of just waiting for him to return. Cato stands in front of me giving me a large smile that I'm sure he thinks is charming but really comes out as a more menacing smirk. "So Madge, how have you been doing?" Cato asks lowering himself into Gale's seat beside me, making sure to face me as he spoke. I lick my lips then swallow a few times trying to find my voice before managing to squeak out "fine, yourself?" which makes him grin even more at me and my hear to fall deeper in my chest, trying to escape Cato just as I which I could, but now I need to at least keep the people form having more of a reason to kill me. If I'm just a sweet naive pretty girl from district twelve then no one will pay me mind until they actually find me. "I'm doing good, excited about the games and all. So what do you say about joining the careers?" I stare at Cato, his words go through my ears but its like my mind can't come to grasps with it so for a while I just stare at him with wide blue eyes before I quickly think up a lie and put forth "I'll have to talk to my mentor but I'll let you know" with the biggest smile I can force without it seeming too cheesy and fake. Cate beams at me and nods then gets ups and leaves just as I see Gale hurriedly making his way back over to me, a concern look on his face. Gale doesn't wait until he's sitting to bombarding me with questions, no he waits until he's standing in for not me, damn well nearly on top of me. "What did he want? Are you okay? Did he try anything? I swear to god I'll hurt him if he did, Madge did he?" Gale splutters out quickly, his eyes not leaving mine and I can't speak not because I'm still freaked out by Cato but because Gale called me Madge. Not princess, Undersee, or even townie. No he used my real name. It's only when Gale gives me an incredulous look that I recover mu ability to speak, "Nothing, just asked me to join them but I said no. I'm fine Gale just drop it, he didn't try anything, okay?" I sputter back looking at him feeling annoyed, "he shouldn't act nice to me if he doesn't mean it" I think looking at Gale's, well structured face glares over at me.

Cato who, is talking to his district partner, and not even a few seconds later he disappears into the evaluation room for his one on one session. I finally pull my attention from Gale and close my eyes as I try to think of what I cold show the Gamemakers but with no avail. The only thing that seems to be on my mind is if Cato will try to come after me in the games, and if he does will he rape me then kill me or let me be apart of the career pack then rape and kill me. My stomack is knotted and I feel so sick, not to mention that my body is as tensed more than I though it was possible. It sees like time both stand still yet speeds up as we sit out here waiting to for out turn with the game keepers, all fearing what sore they could give us because that would pretty much destine if we have sponsors or not.

For some reason my mind is plagued with useless little things like how I wish would have spent a little more time reading to my mother, I mean I knew she couldn't hear me since she was drugged up on morphling almost all the time but it soothed me a lot to at least spend some quality time with my mother even if she didn't know I was there. I wish I would have painted more with Peeta since it was the only time I could really get him to relax, to have had one last late night talk about northing important to my father, while we talked about books, the only real thing we have in common. How I wish I would have finally token Darius up on that lunch at the hob, or how I wish I could have really have gave Rye a chance instead of waited for Gale Hawthorne to really notice me, because I now know he won't ever notice me.

Before I know it, its Gale's turn to go into impress the Gamemakers, "Good luck Gale" I blurt out not even being able to contain what my heart wants me to do even though my mind tells me to just ignore him and build him up to the Capital people from a far. Gale looks at me then gives me a faint smile "yeah. You too Undersee" before he gets up and walks through the door leaving me by myself with my frantic mind trying to focus on what I should to for the Gamemakers while also trying to focus on how to best act while in the scoring room. But even though my mind sifts through things I could try and ways to carry myself I still come up empty because none of them feel right and I'm scare. God I'm so scared. I hadn't realized until now how fucking scared I am about actually dying. About actually not existing and how that will affect the few people close to me like my mother and father, Peeta and Rye, and lastly Haymitch. Then my mind is on how Peeta will deal with Katniss picking Gale instead of him, of how he has no one to vent to because I'm gone. About how he doesn't have anywhere to go when his mom gets too hard to handle. Of how he won't have anywhere to sneak out to, on nights he can't sleep, of me having to spend hours on ends running my fingers through his thick blond hair before he calms down after one of his mothers frequent attacks on him and finally goes to sleep. Who will look after him? Of my mother and father, or Haymitch and anyone else I hold dear to my heart.

As I wait impatiently for my turn to impress the judges I can't help but think about when I started liking Gale Hawthorne. I was ten and he was twelve. I was walking one day from school, but unlike my normal days where I walk with Peeta. I was walking alone since my best friend had the flu. I hadn't made it two blocks from the school when a group of boys from the grade above me circled me and stopped me form continuing on home. They had first pulled my books out of my hands, throwing them into a nearby puddle before yanking my backpack off my arm forcefully then dumping it out. Next they started to push me back and forth between them until one of them slapped me hard across the face before pushing me into a puddle. Gale had been walking by and had seen what was happening and had rushed over stopping the boys, who I found out where all fro the seam. He had asked them what they were doing and if they wanted to get pummeled for picking on a little girl before he punched one of them and that seemed to get them to run away. Gale had helped me pick up my things then walked me home and after that day he never treated me with compassion and kindness because when he seen my big house he knew I was nobody he wanted to associate with.

I'm being pulled out of my thoughts as I notice the red light turn red, then I'm rising slowly to my feet and meekly making my way towards the room still oblivious of what to do for the Gamemakers. My shoes echo in the silent room as I make my way into it with "don't forget to say your name and district when your dine" I think on repeat, as if I might forget it. The Gamemakers seem on edge, so I already know this isn't good. A man with a strange fire stencil cut beard looks at me as if suspicions I might do something. Almost immediately and fully on reflex I beam widely at the Gamemakers as I walk meekly over towards the center of the room, where everything seems to be placed at. My hair swings too and fro around my shoulders with each step I take, no doubt making me look just I want.

My eyes search over the gamekeepers until I see one pouring a very fine wine, that I thank my luckily star my father had drilled into my head about all the wines and alcoholic beverages the Capital people like, "oh is that Ocean Orchard? I think I've had that once, when my father was entertaining the President when I was nine" I say with just the right amount of excitement and wonder, that it seems to catch the man pouring the wine's attention. He beams looking at me fondly before waving me over towards the staircase that leads up to them "please come join us my dear. I've forgotten what its like having such a pretty girl who knows her place around" the man gushes with a pouty smile as he offers me a flute of wine. I want to toss my drink in his face for how he describes me, as if I was only existing to serve men. But I know how these people are so I laugh shyly before swatting at his arm gently while stating "oh hush, your embarrassing me" which causes everyone to laugh. I get a fluid conversation going with them, about everything I know will catch their fancy and how it will make me more likeable in there book since I'm not that great with the actual stations as were the other districts. If I had to just be scored on my abilities then I'd be screwed but because I'm using what knowledge I do know about these disgusting people I just might get a decent score.

When I leave the room, its with displeasure from the Gamemakers which makes me smile widely to myself until I realize I'm not trying to actually win, I'm trying to save Gale and his family. There's no one waiting for me when I get out of the scoring room, so I just hurry over to the elevator to head back to to our floor to take a long hot shower, to get all the disgust I feel at the Gamemakers and that I had to act like I was one of them. When I get out of the elevator everyone is waiting for me but without a word I quickly rush to my room, grabbing a bottle of alcohol on my way before locking myself in my room so no one can see me loose myself in another selfish pity party.


	6. Chapter 6 Scorings and Interviews

*Author note- Sorry for not posting I was extremely busy so I made sure to lengthen this chapter even more :) I hope you guys enjoy. Please review and sorry for any errors I've missed, You guys are amazing and once again thank you guys tremendously :) -007twihunger

**_Chapter Six: Scorings and Interviews_**

I find myself draining half the bottle of alcohol, it makes my throat burn from its harshness but I ignore it and quickly pad into the bathroom only to stop and stare at the pristine, fine marble that makes the bathtub. With deft fingers I quickly start filling the tub with warm water, then I disrobe and climb into the slightly scalding water. The half empty bottle of alcohol clinks against the tub as my hand hangs over the edge of the tub before I drain the last remains of the bottle, earning a loud sputter of coughs from me then the bottle clinking noisily to the ground. My mind is fuzzy and seems to only be filled with thoughts of a piano, of the keys underneath my fingers and the music swelling around me as I play, "maybe they have one here" I think with a small smile coming to cover my lips as I sink further into the water. Its like a fog that the idea comes to me, one minute my thoughts are slowly sifting through some of my favorite pieces of music until I hurriedly turn to just letting myself sink even further into the tub and end it all. I can't help but sit there for a little while, mulling over that though until I deem it's a must. I'd rather drown myself then having anyone kill me especially since I know what Cato wants to do to me before he kills me. I shutter in fear just thinking about the burly boy who is Cato then without another thought I quickly sink down in the tub, not even attempting to hold my breath. But like the tub knows what I'm about to do, it drains itself leaving me cold and laying in the now empty tub with a large frown on my face, "of course they would have sensors in the tub" I can't help but think as I stare at the small black sensors lining the tub, making it impossible to off yourself. I guess they really cut of every type of way you could kill yourself here in the Training Center, probably so every death is televised.

After releasing an annoyed sigh I get up then start the shower and wash up before getting out and pulling on a new silk pair of pajamas, that are a deep gray that may or may not remind me of a certain seam boy. My feet carry me around the floor we have to ourselves until I find a baby grand piano, which is in front of a large glass wall that shows off the very large very extravagant fountain out front of the Training Center which switches slowly through every color of the rainbow. I can't help the large smile that takes refuge on my face or that I practically run over to the piano before taking a seat at the bench as I just stare at the keys, feeling like a child making it through yet another reaping, but knowing just in a few days I'll be going into the game. Tomorrow is the interviews then the next day we'll be entering the arena to start the seventy-fourth Hunger Games, and god only knows when and how I'll die.

The song that comes out of me is beautiful yet haunting, its new and refreshing. Offering up the prospect of something good to come but then ends sorrowfully at the end, leaving the last key to linger in the quiet room eerily. I feel content yet like there's something missing in the music, like maybe the song itself isn't finished. In a way it reminds me of my life back home, in district twelve. OF how everything is great for the most part but it isn't. I may live a comfy sturdy life but that doesn't stop the horrors from happening to my family and I. On the outside everything seems like a perfect painting, which leaves you in both awe and silent longing jealousy. But on the inside everything is wrong. We aren't a family anymore, just puppet figures placed in a large house who might not starve or freeze to death but that doesn't stop from having our every move and milestone in our lives planned out from President Snow himself.

Only when my head starts spinning do I get up and start making my way back towards my room, humming as I bump into the wall slightly. When I turn down the next corner I run smack dab into Cinna who gives me a friendly smile as he catches me and stops me from falling, I don't want anyone to know I'm drunk so I stand a little taller and plaster on my mayors daughter smile "suppers done. We've all been looking for you" Cinna says looking at me with slight concern, so swiftly I step back from him and motion with my head down the hallway I just came from, making sure to look embarrassed even though I'm not in the least. "I found a piano and got carried away" I put forth, adding a small amount of giggles to my words. Cinna smiles brighter at me, seeing my large smile "I had no idea you played the piano" he says thoughtful as we start walking towards the dining room. I have to pay way more attention to how I walk then I normally do as well with how I talk, trying my hardest to stop myself from slurring or stumbling. "Yes I've been playing since I was three, my mother taught me. I've even played for the President a few times" I say, my words seem monotone as I speak about the President and silently I curse myself, wishing I was at least as graceful with my drunken words but I guess with time anyone who drank a lot would be. My stomach turns threateningly as I remember I'm already dead, "I keep forgetting that part" I mumble to myself as I take my normal seat at the table and to my surprise I'm wedged in between Cinna and Gale, while Portia sits to Gale's left. I make sure to keep my eyes down and act like I'm not even there but then a question is targeted towards me. I look up sheepishly not having heard who asked it or even what they said, so I just stare awkwardly from one person to the next before Gale repeats what he had said, trailing off at the end "I asked where you were? I though…" he shakes his head slightly as if to remove the thought he just had. His still slightly shaggy hair sways in front of his gray eyes that look at me intently, holding me in place as if I might get up and disappear.

With an awkward clearing of my throat I take in that everyone is now openly staring at me, awaiting for what I'm going to say. I raise my shoulders a little then let them fall back to where they naturally rest as I bite at my bottom lip "just playing the piano I found" I offer up not looking at Gale, and instead picking up my fork and spearing a piece of pork onto it before popping it into my mouth. I over chew the piece of meat making it taste awful. Gale reaches his hand under the table and grabs my hand giving it a squeeze, asking silently if I'm okay. I almost nod but then catch myself and quickly squeeze Gale's hand back before he retreats and moves his hand into his own lap, then starts eating as well. With that everyone begins their conversations again which in no time switch over to what Gale and I did for the Gamemakers.

Gale looks angry yet sheepish as he lowers his head more towards the table, so that his chin just about touches his chest, I stare at him with furrowed eyebrows wondering along with everyone else what my district partner has done for his scoring. "I just talked to them about wines and such" I say with a shrug of my shoulder as if that were enough, as if it wasn't strange. Immediately Gale's head jerks up and he's looking at me with furrowed brows of his own, an emotion quickly passes through his gray eyes but before I can label what it is, its gone and he's looking at me blankly as if not wanting to let something known which confuses me to no end. Haymitch clears his throat loudly, gaining both Gale and my attention, his eyes are calm and calculating, not to mention closed off and this alone makes me feel unnerved "what do you have planned Haymitch?" I think, my eyes moving from one to the other of his eyes which are surprisingly not that clouded with alcohol. "Good job May. Now Gale what did you do?" Haymitch states, I feel like my heart jumped into my throat and now is lodged in it. Sure Haymitch has called me May or Maysilee more times than I can count, but that's only when its just us. Since he never really goes out, besides the small trips he makes to buy some more booze or when he comes over to my house to check up on us. But hearing him call me that in front of these people startles me, not because I care what they'll think. No, never that. But because I don't like other people knowing that even the few people who love and care about me, can't even remember who I am at times.

I silently pray that no one caught the slip of his tongue but the scowl on Gale's face tells me other wise, I can tell the way his calculating eyes look inconspicuously from Haymitch to me that he is about to say something so quickly I blurt out "what did you do for the Gamemakers Gale?" he looks at me and I can tell he already knows what I'm trying to do and it surprises me when his shoulders drop a fraction in defeat, making me let a whoosh of air zip past my lips. I don't miss the hard stare Gale secretively sends me, it silently states 'I'll shut up for now, but I want answers Undersee'. I nod my head dumbly then look at my food and am no longer hungry. I know its because the nerves I feel bubbling up in my stomach for our scoring, the games, and for the talk I have awaiting later with Gale. With a sigh I turn my gaze back over to Gale and listen as he begins to speak "I shot some arrows, tied some knots nothing too great" my nose scrunches up and my eyes crinkle slightly as I think about how everyone was so, on alert when I had come into the room and before I can stop myself I blurt out "the Gamemakers seemed a little … okay a lot like they were on high alert" the look Gale sends me makes me wish the floor would open up and I could disappear through it but it doesn't, so all I can do is look at him with wide eyes, trying to convey how sorry I am. That I hadn't meant to say what I did and that I wish I could take my words back, but I can't they've already been let loose.

"Well since we're getting everything out in the table, don't you think you should offer up what you've been keeping Undersee?" Gale practically growls at me with narrowed eyes. I look at him perplexed, having no idea what he's talking about so I state just that "look I don't know what your talking about Hawthorne." I make sure to say his last name with as much disdain he used for mine, if not more. Letting him know I'm not afraid of him or his nasty treatment of me, but on the inside his words hurt more than he could ever possibly know. "Alright settle down. Madge why don't you go first then Gale" Haymitch puts forth, causing me to glare at him which he ignores and takes a large drink from his glass no doubt probably something alcoholic. An annoyed groan is strangled in my throat as I look at my godfather "like I just said, I don't know what he's talking about" my words are strained and just barely contained from the annoyance I feel. My small hands wring the napkin in my lap not caring that every once in a while my arm will bum into the table making Gale and my chalice almost spill, "well I do. That guy from district two has taken quite a shining to Undersee and she's pretty chummy with him, if I'm being honest." Gale's words are like a slap to my face, the way he insinuates how I'm now friends with Cato instead of just making sure I have less people aiming to be the one responsible for my downfall, when maybe the only one I need to look out for is Gale, "would he kill me? Could he kill me?" I think. Effie excitedly talks about how well my chances will be if I stand with the careers, while Portia and Cinna look contemplating at me as if maybe they miss judged who they thought I was. But most importantly of all is Haymitch, who looks ready to kill someone with the way his eyes narrow into slits at Gale and his hands are clenched tightly on top of the table.

No one says anything, we're just sat in an uncomfortable silence that I wish would just break or maybe I could break Gale's neck, but then there's the whole thing about me loving him more than wanting to live so almost immediately I let my anger decapitate. Maybe I was wrong that Gale would treat me like a partner, when all I'll ever really be to him is the spoiled little mayors daughter from back home, "Pearl?" Haymitch's gruff voice questions as he tries to contain his anger at me from keeping this from him, I look at my golden placemat before looking up at him with a weak smile "I forgot about that … I was going to talk about it with you later. He asked me to join them and I told him I would talk to you about it then get back to him. I didn't say no or yes. And I most certainty didn't get his attention on finding me and killing me" I point out, with the end of my words I send a narrowed look Gale's way before turning my attention to our mentor. Haymitch scrubs his hands over his face as he thinks over what I just said then the next thing I know he's nodding and smiling, "always the smartest one in the room, Pearl" Haymitch puts forward, giving me a prideful look that makes my heart swell as a small smile graces my face at my godfathers compliment. Then swiftly Haymitch turns his gaze to my district partner, I don't miss the narrowed glare Haymitch give Gale, probably for almost giving him a heart attack about me fraternizing with the enemy.

Gale give Haymitch a glare in return to his own before begrudgingly put forth "I shot an arrow at a pig that was near them. I just got so mad. They were ignoring me, I just let myself get carried away because I knew that if they gave me a bad score then I'd have no hope. I know I fucked up but there's nothing to do about it now." Hid words are filled with self-hatred and regret and without my consent I immediately reach out and give his hand a squeeze making his deep gray eyes to turn to me as he offers up a weak smile with furrowed eyebrows then he links our fingers together, making me feeling hope bloom in my chest as I try to ignore the small voice in the back of my head telling me he's just being friendly but that we're defiantly not friends, no way in hell would Gale willingly be my friend. Haymitch thinks for a few seconds, staring at his almost empty plate as he does. He looks at me then to Gale before doing it once more. I take notice of the hope that seems to fill his blue eyes, threating some type of interference of what I've already began to build up for Gale, but like the sly dog he is he doesn't offer up anything and I know that could very well bite me in the ass when he does let whatever he has up his sleeves loose.

The chatter at the table diminishes until it is nothing, then our plates are being cleared and we are making our way into the living room to watch the scoring. Caesar Flickerman stands before us on a black shiny stage, his smile wide and his skin tanned to perfection. His blue hair of course matched his blue suit. The only thing I can hear is my heartbeat as I stare at the screen. District after districts it shows the tributes pictures then their scores they earned. Marvel from district one got an nine while his partner, Glimmer got an 6. Cato got impressive ten just like his district partner Clove. District three and the girl from district four get a five while the boy from district four got a good score of seven. District five through ten got scores varying from five through seven. The male tribute from district eleven, Thresh gets an impressive ten while the small and adorable Rue got an very impressive eight. Then everyone in our room is tensed and holding their breaths as we all stare impatiently at the television screen waiting for the scores of district twelve to flash across the screen. Gale's picture pops onto the screen then a beat later the number eleven flashes to the screen and we're all giving Gale cheers of excitement. I don't think before I jump up and throw myself into Gale's arms, hugging him tightly to myself and its like he's too excited to know who I am because he hugs me back and swings me around in a circle before putting me onto the ground. Then once again the room is quiet. My picture pops to the screen then after a short beat an impressive twelve flashes. The room is shocked around me and I feel like my world is spinning, I spring to my feet and starts to move forward until my eyes meet blue ones then a pair of gray ones and the next thing I know everything goes black.

My head hurts and is still foggy with alcohol from the night before. My eyes are sore, tired, and the bright light shinning into the room makes them and my head hurt even more. When I do manage to pull my eyes open I take notice of my room in the Training Center, which confuses me greatly. "What did you do last night?" I think squeezing my eyes shut trying to keep the room from spinning as I salivate my mouth then move so I'm sitting in a sitting position, my breathing is slightly more labored then normal as I fight down the puke slowly trying to rise in my throat. A groan leaves my lips as I hunch over then cradle my head in my hands, "after I came back from entertaining the Gamemakers I … I played the piano … then … then … then I had dinner and after that we watched the scoring and.." I breath out before trailing off as I remember passing out "great" I think blowing my hair out of my face then slowly getting to my feet just as there's a painfully too loud knock at my door making my hands fly up to cover my ears as my head thrums with pain that gets worse as my ears are met by Effie's shrill voice.

After I slowly work my way into the bathroom, I manage to guzzle down some water from the faucet before taking a nice hot shower, which releases some of the muscles I hadn't even known were hurting as well as sooth some of the ach in my head. When I'm done I pull on a pair of cotton black shorts and a matching black t-shirt that I find next to it then I run a brush through my hair until it is tangle free. My eyes stare at my reflection unseeingly as my fingers absentmindedly braid my hair over my left shoulder, into a very familiar braid I've seen quite a few times back home. Sluggishly I make my way out of my room then into the dining room, where Effie, Portia, Cinna, Haymitch, and Gale all sit patiently waiting for me to join them for breakfast before they begin eating. "Finally you grace us with your presence Undersee" Gale mutters beside me, rolling his eyes as he does. My stomach aches and feels as if I hadn't eaten anything in days, which is kind of true since I've been just nibbling on things here and there. I frown then make sure to pile my plate full knowing I won't be able to eat this heartily while inside the arena.

The talking around the table is minimal or maybe I'm just so lost in my head, but either ways its nice and it reminds me of home. When I was at home I'd almost always eat alone every meal besides on Friday night which meant I had to stomach Mrs. Mellark's cooking but at least I wasn't alone. Sometimes the Mellark boys will invite themselves over for lunch on the weekends but really its mostly only Peeta, thinking about Peeta makes my heart clench with unbearable pain that makes me want to curl into myself, to protect me from the pain. I feel lost with out him leading me. It's always been that way with Peeta and me, he'd lead me while I lead him since we were too afraid to do anything for ourselves. "Wonder if Peeta at least tried to talk to Katniss? I mean sure it would be for nothing but at least he put his heart out there and now he won't always be wondering what if" I think as a smile pulls at the corner of my lips, I pop a piece of strawberry into my mouth as I pour myself a large glass of water since I know I need to stay as hydrated as I can, for as long as I can.

Halfway done with my food I look up, glancing at everyone but then my eyes come to rest on Gale's sad gray eyes that are fixed on me … well my braid. I look at him in confusion before looking down and seeing the braid, as if actually noticing what I did and who it no doubts reminds Gale of, Katniss Everdeen. I scowl down at my plate as I quickly yank the tie loose from the bottom of my braid before yanking my hair out of the braid, not even attempting to care that I'm pulling my hair hard at times. I feel mad at myself for making my hair remind Gale of Katniss, of Gale only always thinking about her. I'm just as good as she is, just as smart, and just as kind if not more. I'm just as good, but I guess not good enough for Gale. I don't have the gray eyes he likes or the dark brown hair and scowl like Katniss, no I'm too bright and cheery looking while Katniss is mysterious and tempting. Maybe I'm not as good as she is and maybe she's just always going to be better than me, I mean Gale certainly didn't think I was worth his time before and only now we're heading into the games I'm finally good enough for him to be cordial with, just because I'm the only think from back home he can talk to. I mean yeah he could try and talk to Haymitch but its obvious who Haymitch wants to win, plus He's almost always drunk out of his mind.

I feel angry, despair filled tears start to brim my eyes as I realize how unwanted I really am, "maybe Peeta and I should have just gotten together" I think sadly but then I remember about Rye and how he now seems to like me, "yeah but all he wants to do is kiss me in the private of his room or on slim occasions at night in the meadow just near the fence. He doesn't try to hold my hand in public or take me on dates, hell he doesn't even take me out in public like he use to do all the time with his ex-girlfriend Shelby Marks" I think, feeling a stone settle in my chest with the realization. No one wants me, not my parents or any boys back in our district. I have no real friend besides Peeta, he's the only person I'm one hundred percent sure was my real friend because he liked me for me, because he wanted to be my friend. Not for the perks that came with being the mayors daughters friend but because he actually like me for me and wanted to spend time with me. I can't help but think about if Peeta and I would have ended up together after we realized that Gale and Katniss would never reciprocate our feelings. I mean the two people we loved barely ever acknowledged our existence. Peeta and I love each other of course and I'm pretty sure we could come to love each other that way, if only I wasn't being sent to die. Peeta's always been the bright spot in my life, so full of happiness and always smiling … well when he's away from his mother's watchful eye. I quickly force my best friend out of my head knowing if I continue to think about him I'll cry.

I don't wait patiently for everyone else to finish their breakfast before I whisper "I'm going to go play" I nod to myself as I get up from my seat then walk away from the table, feeling eyes burn into my back but I just ignore it and make myself stand taller as well as square my shoulders, walking at a set pace back towards where I know the piano resides. I feel an almost foreign churning of excitement whit just thinking about playing the piano, and that makes me feel even more pathetic that I'm getting so excited about a piano. But then again it kind of makes sense that it means so much to me, it was the one thing I really shared with my mother before she got too sick to get out of bed. Even before she was really sick I would catch my mother looking at me sadly or just stare at me, which I now know was because of my distinct resemblance of my late aunt Maysilee Donner. When I reach the piano I hastily sit down on the bench then begin to play all the songs I know, starting with the very first one I learned to play working my way up, but before I can even reach the third composition Cinna sits down on the bench next to me causing me to stop at his presence. My wide blue eyes meek Cinna's green eyes, he offers me a genuine smile "you play beautifully Madge" he puts forth making my cheeks flame with a blush, still not being able to take compliments towards me since I never really got them. The ones I did get were from Capital people and they were always about thing that shouldn't matter or just too vile to be acknowledged. Once last year while we had Capital guest we had this man named Seneca Crane, who just so happens to be the head Gamemaker in the games this year. He had been overly handy, trying to brush my hair out of my face or lingering whenever he'd brushed his skin against mine. He had even attempted to come into my room that night, I had moved my dresser in front of my door like I did anytime we had guests but this time the door had almost opened from his sheer strength. I had been so freaked out I had climbed out my bedroom window then ran through town barefoot all the way to the Mellark's house to get Peeta. He had spent the whole night letting me cry as I told him of my fears of one night forgetting to block my door or one of them being strong enough to move both the door and dresser and having some Capital freak attack me, Peeta had just held me tight brushing my hair down my back promising he'd kill them if that ever happened. The next day when he got home his mother beat him for disappearing during the night which had made me cry but after a while I stopped since Peeta kept saying it was worth it making sure I was okay, he's a good friend like that.

"Thanks … you make ordinary things look exstrodinary" I quickly reply, making sure to add a complement for him being polite like I was taught to be. Cinna smiles at me making his eyes have a twinkle in them as the corners of his eyes crinkled up "thank you," he chuckles pressing an ivory key down making the room swell with its tune, ringing all around us. "It's not that hard to make something beautiful if its already beautiful when it gets to you" he puts forth giving me a knowing smile before getting up from the bench then offers me his hands which I take, letting him help me up from the bench "already time to get ready for the interviews?" I ask feeling an all too familiar lump starting to form in my throat as I Cinna and I walk side by side towards where he and my prep team waste no time at all getting me to look my absolute best.

If I close my eyes I can pretend that I'm back home getting my monthly polish up, that I'm made to withstand once a month so I'm always up to the President's standards of how I'm supposed to look. But I know that when I open my eyes I won't be in the room that's been mine since birth but in a room I've only seen a few times while being here in the Training Center. My nails are painted with pretty flames not only on my fingernails but my toenails, no doubt to hold up my girl on fire statue. My makeup looks like smoldering coal, my hair is in an elaborate updo that is strangely braided tightly in the back with some strands framing my face while white, blue, yellow, orange, and red jewels clipped in precise places making my hair look like I have small lickers of flames in it with each and every step I take. My interview dress is black and encased in beautiful gems like the ones in my hair. With every step I take I look as if I'm absorbed in flames which makes me smile at how amazing Cinna has made me look, "Cinna … this is so beautiful." I grin looking over at my stylish who smiles warmly back at me. "No Madge you look beautiful" Cinna rephrased my words before throwing them back at me, my cheek flames red then mutter "yeah right, if I was then Gale would like me" lowly without a second thought until I take in Cinna's sad face. He stares at me contemplating whatever's on his mind, "if Gale can't see what a catch you are then he doesn't deserve you" Cinna declares, taking hold of my chin so I'm looking at him. His words sound so sincere it makes me smile so wide that it hurts my cheeks, even if I don't quite believe them.

Cinna has me step into a pair of flame blue sky high, high heels that have me scared I'll fall on my face in front of all but since I've wore heels this tall and even taller for some of the Capital dinner parties we occasionally have. Then before I know it Gale and I are being whisked off for our Interviews. Gale's in a black suit that has flames up the cuffs of his suit jacket as well as red framing his lapels, while his dark brown hair is slicked back making him look more approachable but then if he were to glare I guess not so much. "You clean up well" I say trying to be polite as I give Gale a soft smile, I'm surprised as Gale links our hands together even if it is for a few seconds only to give me a small squeeze I quickly return before he lets my hand go. "You too Undersee" His gruff voice replies as we both Watch Marvel from district one walk out onto the stage with Caesar Flickerman who is in a dark blue suit that sparkles. I feel like I want to jump out of my own skin as I wait impatiently for my turn to get my interview over with, but since I'm the last one that's going to be a while off.

I watch as one by one the tributes take their place next to Caesar and answer his questions. I can't pay too much attention to them since I'm freaking out inside, sure I've been on the small stage back home but that was easy since district twelve isn't that big but here, there is so many people. The tributes all have a distinct tactical persona they use for their interviews ranging everywhere from sexy to cocky, to smart and intimidating. My heart clenches as all too soon Gale makes his way out to Caesar. They shake hands then sit down, Gale in a clear chair while Caesar takes his seat in a blue chair "wonder if they switch out the chair to match his outfits?" I think as I distinctly remember last year when he was all about the orange, he had indeed had a orange chair. Gale looks really nervous and uncomfortable and I can't thank god enough as Caesar works his magic on him until he's relaxed some.

"So, Gale the Capital is sure quite a bit different than district twelve. What's impressed you the most since your arrived here?" Caesar asks excitedly, Gale looks lost for second and after laughing Caesar repeats his question for Gale. I watch as Gale looks out into the crowd then he releases a small breath before putting on the same smile he wore for the tribute parade which makes me beam brightly, "the food. I haven't had a lot of if it back in district twelve so it's a nice change" Gale says sounding surprisingly friendly. Caesar smiles then states "we do have some very tasty treats here, now don't we?" the audience cheer their agreement then quiet down as Caesar begins talking once more. "Now Gale, when you came out in the opening ceremonies my heart just stopped. What did you think of your costume?" "After I got over the fact I wasn't going to burn to death, I thought that Madge and I looked amazing. Cinna and Portia did a fantastic job with our costumes and I'm just glad I got to wear it." If I didn't know Gale I would immediately think he was actually having a good time talking with Caesar but since I know him and have watched him from a close distance I know how hard this is for him to keep up this stupid pretense for these disgusting people. The crow go while with cheers of how they loved our costumes and that we looked beautiful, and I can tell Gale wants to glare at them but he just smirks and shakes his head like he's slightly embarrassed.

"An eleven, Wow, can you tell us how you got it?" Caesar pulls with a sly friendly smile on his face, Gale glances up towards the Gamemakers box seeming to act like giving it a thought before me smiles and shakes his head stating "all I can say is that I think it was a first" which is met with loud squeals of excitement from the bubbly Capital people. "Oh fine. Then lets go back to the reaping, can you tell me about how you felt when they called your brothers name and when you volunteered?" My stomach turns in disgust and I know Gale's must to and I can tell by the way I see his left hand clench then quickly relax. "His names Rory, and I love him and my two other siblings with all my heart." Gale gets out without a thought, but at least it isn't rude just seeming slightly rushed so I'm more than sure he still has a long line of sponsors. Caesar nods acting like they're two best friends having a serious conversation, "did he come to visit you?" Gale just nod weakly looking sad which gains a awe from the crowed then they quiet down once more.

"What did he say to you while he visited you?" Caesar asks, the audience our basically on the edge of their seats waiting for Gale's answer. I watch as Gale's Adams apple bobs in his throat, "he told me to try my hardest to come home and … and to look after Madge" Gale says. He looks slightly surprised that he even said that but then he's smirking and the audience are practically swooning, men and women. Before Caesar can try to get anymore juicy information out of Gale the buzzer sounds and Gale is on his way off the other side of the stage, then Caesar is calling my name and I'm frozen. I stand there for a few seconds then force myself to move forward as well as plaster a beaming smile that I'm sure makes my eyes sparkle. I focus on counting my steps to Caesar instead of paying attention to the loud crowd, who are yelling and cheering for me. I'm in a slight daze as Caesar kisses my hand and welcomes me to his show and of course I smile and blush while saying "it's a real privilege to be here, thank you for having me" as if he could have not had me here "yeah right" I think, not even having to try to keep my smile on since I've reverted back into my mayors daughter role.

"Ah Margaret, tell us has the Capital lived up to your standards?" Caesar asks, as if I could say no and get away with it, "please call me Madge Caesar. We're amongst friends after all." My words fly out of my mouth like I've prepared this to perfection even though I'm just coming up with things at random. Caesar grins at me then looks out to the audience "isn't she just precious!" he practically shouts, making the crowd go crazy with their agreement. I lick my lips "growing up being the mayors daughter I've got to see so many beautiful things and meet so many exciting people, so being here is a dream really. And it's lived up to everything probably beyond my imagination" I gush, resting my hand lightly on Caesar's knee as I do. The conversation is more tame than I thought it would but I'm not complaining. Caesar questions about mindless things like if I won would I come back to the Capital which I reply 'yes' to, I spin around showing him the flames on my dress, making everyone go absolutely nuts with adoration of my dress. Then he moves on to a question that takes me by surprise. "Tell us Madge, is there a boy back home who has your heart?" its like on instinct that I shake my head letting a light giggle slip through my lips then get out "no." Caesar looks unconvinced as he sits on the edge of his seat, closer to me.

"A beautiful young lady like yourself now, I don't believe it for a minute. There must be some lucky lad, come on, what's his name?" Caesar says I let out a small sigh, looking to my nails. "Well there is this one boy I've had a crush on forever but … but I'm pretty sure he doesn't even care I exist" I get out before I can comprehend what I'm saying. Sounds of sympathy sound from the crowd. Unrequired love, I guess they can relate to me. "Does he have a young lay of his own?" I frown looking down before quickly catching myself then look into Caesar's blue eyes. "I'm not too sure. I mean all the girls notice him … so its not that surprising he hasn't really taken any interest in me" I say with a small shrug acting as if it didn't bother me but I know you can visibly tell it does. "So here's what you do. You win, you go home. He can't turn you down then, eh?" he quickly puts in giving me a reassuring smile that makes me forget about where I am and that I'm televised in front of all Panem. "Winning wouldn't work in my case … I have to get him home. Gale has so much…" I say with furrowed eyebrows looking at Caesar then I realize what I've just said and trail off, realizing that everyone has heard me.

My eyes immediately find Gale's and he looks at me surprised and the cameras are on him taking in his reaction and thankfully the buzzer sounds and I'm quickly bidding my goodbye before gracefully making my way off the stage. The Capital anthem plays then everyone starts heading back to their floors. Without a word to anybody I quickly slip off my shoes and grab them before bolting off for the elevators not caring that Thresh and Rue occupy it. They each give me a glance and I try my hardest to keep my tears in, not knowing what Gale or even Haymitch will say. "Oh god what are Rye and Katniss thinking?" I think, the elevator dings and I realize I'm all alone and at my floor. I rush out of the elevator and breath a sigh of relief seeing I'm the only one here but that quickly changes when another elevator door dings and the next thing I know an angry Gale storm out of it and right towards me. I stare at him with wide eyes and before I can react Gale grabs me by my shoulders then shoves me against the wall making me gasp from the force of it "what the fuck are you playing at Undersee?" Gale grits out glaring at me, I don't say anything just stare at him feeling my eyes tear up even more. I see both our stylists, Haymitch, and Effie walk out of an elevator which has just arrived.

I shove against Gale hating more than ever the look of pity I'm getting, its like it happens in slow-motion, Gale shoves me back against the wall and the force of it makes me stumble to the right then crash into a large vase which brakes and effortlessly cut into my hands but before anyone can do anything I'm on my feet and running to my room, I lock the door behind me and let myself cry into my dress, making the fake coal dust billows in the air. I can hear shots of my name being called at the door as well as Haymitch's loud voice no doubt yelling at Gale but all I can think about is how much my heart hurts. I knew Gale didn't like me but I never knew he despised me so much that it would make him mad that I like him. I clamp my hands over my ears trying to cancel out the noise from behind the door as I squeeze my eyes close, whishing more than anything Peeta was here with me, and that's the last thought I have before I fall asleep.


	7. Chapter 7 Let The Hunger Games Begin

*Author note- I'm more and more surprised with each and everyday that passes by that i get more views, just wow :) thank you guys so much from the bottom of my heart, this means a lot to me. You guys are amazing beyond words. Remember to review, enjoy, and forgive the errors I've missed :) -007twihunger xox

**_Chapter Seven: Let The Hunger Games Begin._**

When I awake its to a burning sensation in the palms of my hands which makes me release a hiss as I jerk my hands away from the painful feeling and quickly sit up, I blink a few times until my eyes adjust to the harsh florescent lights of my room then my eyes take in a very annoyed looking Haymitch who quickly pulls my hands back to him then dump a large douse of some clear alcohol making me gasp yanking them away from him as my eyes narrow at him. "What the hell is your problem?" I grit out, hands shaking from the burning pain of the alcohol in my cuts that I take notice is void of any glass. "Well if you would have let me in four hours ago maybe I would have been more delicate with you but making me have to go search for a damn key for the past twenty minutes I don't think so sweetheart." Haymitch quickly replies without a second thought as he reaches out and jerks my right hand towards him which he quickly bandages then does the same to my other hand. We sit in a tensed silence before Haymitch finally looks into my eyes "are you sure you want that boy to live?" he questions, his eyes burning into mine and I don't miss the hope that swells in them. I swallow thickly then jerk my head into a short nod, casting my head downwards. He doesn't say anything for a while and I'm relieved, until the silence expands and I'm once again looking up at my godfather.

Haymitch doesn't look mad as I suspected he'd be but instead he looks resigned about whatever's flying around in his head, he looks at me and ducks his head into a nod before getting to his feet grumbling "get some sleep while you still can sweetheart" then he's walking out of my room, with a small sigh I lay back down making my dress puff out underneath me and let loose another billow of fake coal dust that I watch slowly disappear into nothingness until my eyes are too heavy to open and once again I'm asleep. My dreams are haunting and filled to the brim with red. Gale is being killed slowly by Cato as Clove hold me still pressing one of the knives she's favored in training, into the base of my neck threatening to slit it if I don't stop moving around, I watch with wide eyes as Cato stabs a knife into Gale's chest before he slits his throat fro good measures. I want to scream and, to curse both Cato and Clove but I can't from how hard the knife Clove is pressing into me. I watch in a daze as my vision begins to get fuzzy around the edges from lack of oxygen as Cato slowly makes his way over to me with a wolfish grin on his blood smeared face then his hands go to his belt and I'm being flung to the floor and immediately awake. I sit panting on the floor of my room in the Training Center, thanking god silently that the games hasn't started. And as I look towards the large window in the room I spot the fresh light starting to break through, making my stomach turn realizing I'm going to be going into those games more sooner than I'm wanting to happen.

I don't know how long I just sit on the ground watching the sun slowly rise into the sky, but by the time I make my way into the bathroom to have my last shower the sun is completely over head and shining brightly for all to see. I make sure to have the water on the hottest setting not caring it turns my pale skin bright red, because I know this is most likely the last time I'll ever be able to use actual hot water since there's no plumbing for one and two, I'm going to be dead in a matter of days … or maybe more accurately in a few seconds or a few minutes, its really a toss up between the two really. The water feels great against my tense muscles even though its too hot. I let myself relax some just enjoying the water spraying down on me. I make sure to use a lot of both the shampoo and conditioner that smells like strawberries, which will help some while being in the games for how ever long I last, at least I'll smell like a little piece of home. Like my own special reminder of the boy I love, who use to bring them to me.

I don't get out of the shower until the water is cold, and only then because my body can't stand the frigid water. Not even a second after I step out of the shower I'm engulfed by my prep team, who quickly starts fussing over me. They are stuck between complementing how beautiful I am and trying to keep from crying. I feel physically ill knowing I'm not the only one who knows I'm as good as dead, and even these brainless Capital people know it. The Capital aspect of Cinna, Effie, and my prep team makes me slightly disgusted, but if I'm being honest they now hold a special place in my heart … well more Cinna and Effie. I'm happy that at least I'm able to be around some type of friend before I die, it may not be Peeta but at least its something.

Before I know it Cinna come and collects me and we're being picked up by a hovercraft on top of the Training Center and I've yet to see Gale. I mean I know once we get into the arena he probably won't think twice about me but I know with a damn certainty that he will consume my mind more than I will his. I just wish I could have seen his face one last time, preferably while he wasn't frowning. A tall slender woman with strong features and three thick black tattoos on each side of her eyes quickly inserts a tracking device into my inner forearm. Even though I know it will hurt some I can't stop myself from flinching slightly from the pain that follows the tracker to be placed inside of my arm. It feels like I've only been on the hovercraft for maybe fifteen minutes top before I'm being led by Cinna into a dome shaped place, where he tells me I'll be getting ready before heading into the games.

I'm dressed in a pair of green cargo pants, cotton undergarments, a black t-shirt, an insulated black coat, thick black socks, and black combat boots. My hair is left down in its natural blond waves framing my face as it hangs past my shoulders. I didn't even know it was possible to feel this numb, and I don't like it. I feel like I'm already dead and I guess in so many ways I am, but in so many other ways I'm not. I don't pay any attention to Cinna as he steps in front of me until I feel his fingers gently clasp something to the right of my coat near the collarbone, I look up at him with what I'm presuming to be large sad filled blue eyes. He offers up a smile that says a lot of things even though his lips say nothing, they say how happy he is that he met me. How he actually cares about me, and how he wish it wasn't me in the games. My eyes slowly trail down until I see the gold mockingjay pin on my jacket that had belonged to my late aunt. I had completely forgotten about it. I feel sick with myself, that I had forgot something so special to me that I've had since before I can remember. My pointer finger of my fight hand traces over the bird taking flight and I'm so grateful and happy that Cinna had not forgotten about my one token from home I'll be taking with me into the arena. "Thank you" I breath, knowing my voice will crack if I speak even a fraction of a bit louder. Cinna gives me a warm smile and before he can say anything I throw myself into his arms and hug him tightly "thank you for being so kind to me. I don't know how to express how much what you've done for me means but … just thank you" I get out in a rush Cinna pulls back from me so his kind green eyes are looking into my blue ones, giving me a genuinely warm smile he states "no thanks is needed. Madge I enjoyed helping you, your my favorite tribute I've worked so far" a small smile starts to pull at the corners of my lips then I'm laughing "I'm the only tribute you've worked with" I reply after my laughter had calmed down. "That may be so but I don't think it will change. Plus it got you to smile did it not?" Cinna puts forth making me smile a little bit wider.

Cinna and I have a rather large lunch, just the two of us. And even though we don't spend our time in a lengthy conversation I'm grateful for his company. I eat until I'm full but not too full since I'll have to be running soon and I really don't want to toss my cookies. Its like every passing that it gets closer to the start of the games the more my hearts starts filling with dread. I'm not too entirely sure how I'm going to play the games now that I can't help Gale but then I think about something completely heart wrenching and horrendous I could do, I could kill all the people I found so he was that much closer to being a victor and going home to his family … and Katniss. I'm not too sure I can kill anyone but then again I've never been put in that position before so who's to really say what I'm capable doing until I'm put into a precise predicament.

Much too soon Cinna is making sure my pin is straight and secure to my jacket as I stare unseeingly over his shoulder at the glass cylinder which will take me into the games. My heart is hammering in my chest and this feels like a dream, that this isn't happening. That if I just focus on waking up I'll realize this is only a dream but the stealthy pinch I give my left wrist tells me I'm definitely awake. Cinna tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear before taking a step back from me to give me a last look over "perfect as always. Remember what Haymitch told you. Run, find water, and the rest will follow." He says, I nod not being able move my mouth or tongue to offer up a simple thank you." And remember this. I'm not allowed to bet, but if I could, my money would be on you." His words take me back, not believing them one bit "maybe I misheard him" I think but then I see the pleased look on Cinna's face that lets me know I heard him correctly. "Really?" my voice cracks as I manage to ask my question, "really." Cinna grins. He leans down and kisses my forehead. "Good luck girl on fire." And then the counting starts down for me to get inside my cylinder which I do without much thought since I don't want to get in trouble or whatever would happen to me if I didn't get into my cylinder like I'm supposed to.

The cylinder rises slowly until I'm encased with darkness all around me but just as quickly as the darkness comes its gone and I'm looking around a large wooded arena which makes me smile, knowing how in his element Gale will be here. The cylinder I am slowly goes down then disappears beneath me, I'm left standing on a small metal podium. The podium has bombs connected to them, so incase anyone steps off there podium before the countdowns finished they will get blown up. My eyes realize as I think about the bombs about what I can do, so quickly I crouch down then with deft fingers I quickly untie my boots then even faster taking them off. I take notice of the two tributes on each side of me, on my right is the boy from five and on my left the girl from three. Before I'm able to go along with my plan my eyes lock with intense gray eyes, I'd be able to recognize anywhere. Gale just stares at me. My eyes slowly take in his face before I force myself to turn away from him and swiftly chuck one of my boots at the boy from five, the boot hits the ground just bellow his podium and before anyone knows whats happened he's being blown up. I know that the people who can see me are staring at me but I pay them no mind as I toss my other show over to the girl from three who catches it and gives me a vicious smile but she doesn't realize she should have kept hold of my boot because before she can rethink her decition my boot falls from her hands and bounces twice before falling off the podium and with that she blows up. I feel physically ill yet I'm so incredibly numb. I can't make myself glance over at Gale because I know he must already be looking at me with disgust.

I hear the countdown but its like my mind isn't really taking anything in until the gong sounds. I'm almost the last one off my podium. I run as fast as I can over to a nice size orange and black backpack that I easily scoop up, and as I'm on my mad dash for the woods my eyes catch's Clove's as she hold a throwing knife in her hand as the small boy from four lays on his back at her feet. And even though I know I should just worry about me until I can actually do anything else for Gale, my feet stop running. "This is one less person in the games. On step closer to the end for Gale" I think, trying to reason it but I can't. The next thing I know I'm hastily pulling the backpack onto my back and turning to run straight towards Clove and the small boy. I don't know where my surge of braveness and strength come from but its here, I smash into Clove from the side making us both crash roughly to the ground. We roll on the grass twice before Clove pins me to the ground, slamming me back against it so I'll stop struggling which I do.

We look at each other, I know the moment Clove realizes who I am because that's when a wide scary smile spreads across her faces as a gleam runs through her eye "oh my god I'm going to die" I can't help but think as I stare wide eyed at Clove, watching how she searches the ground near us for something while her other arm holds me down my throat. My eyes water as Clove applies a little more pressure to my throat as she leans back some to look where free hand is, then I see her pick up a knife. I immediately start fighting to get free from her, which makes her slide forward towards me more and without any thoughts at all in my frightened mind I slam my head into hers which makes her fall sideways on to the ground because even though my head hurt it didn't me from struggling to get her off me which I do. As soon as my mind registers Cloves presence on top of me I roll over then I stumble to my feet only to get dragged back when someone grabs onto my hair and yanks making me stumble back some, I freeze once a cold lade presses into my collar bone while the point is pointed straight for my throat. I raggedly pant trying to will my breathing to even out so I won't get cut because of my own breathing. My eyes scrunch closed as I repeat one thought inside my head "I'm sorry," I know that neither of my parents can hear me but it makes me feel better so I keep thinking it.

But before Clove can move the knife any closer toward my throat Cato's voice shouts out "Clove stop!" then my ears are met by the loud stomps of someone running towards us, no doubt Cato himself. And I'm proven right when my eyes open and I'm staring at a very angry looking Cato, who is thankfully not glaring at me but at Clove who still holds the knife to my throat. "She's not one of us Cato! She killed Gem and she saved that little twerp from four! She was lying to you to get you to like her!" Clove shouts at Cato, pressing the knife more into my collarbone which effortlessly tears the skin above my bone making me gasp out in pain and cause Cato to glare at Clove. They both are quiet for a little while and I'm starting to think they forgot about me until I feel the fingernails of Clove's free hand grip my shoulder tightly as she removes the knife from near my throat then roughly shove me forward and towards Cato. I stumble and end up falling into Cato's strong arms fearing he's going to kill me for killing one of their allies but instead he swiftly picks me up slinging me over his shoulder before he carries me off towards the rest of the careers. My backpack rests practically on my head a I dangle upside down, not knowing what the hell I should do. I mean do I fight against Cato trying to possibly get released and run towards the nearby woods, or do I just let this play out and act like I was going to join up with them and Clove just misunderstood the situation we had found ourselves with.

I hold my breath as Cato places me back on the ground on my feet then he steps back from me, I make sure to look as confused and scared as I can which isn't hard well the scared part isn't that hard. My eyes take in the two tributes from district one, Clove, the boy from three, and the girl from four who look at me suspiciously then my eyes come to fall on Cato "I thought you wanted me to join you guys" I question, silently prying to that all that is holy he will believe my lie. Cato looks at me for what feels like forever but really it couldn't be more than a minute or two, "then why did you fight with Clove? And for that matter why did you kill Gem?" Cato throws his own question at me as he takes a step towards me as his dark blue eyes narrow in on me. I don't think I've ever felt this much fear in my life and I'm honestly wondering how much more fear my heart can handle before it just decides to give out. My mouth feels dry and so does my throat not to mention scratchy, I swallow twice then somehow manage to find my voice "I was coming to join you guys when this girl ran in front of me with this backpack" I state as I quickly take the orange and black backpack off my back and throw it onto the ground at mine and Cato's feet. "I managed to get this from her but I tripped over Clove before I could get her" I say with anger while letting my eyes trail down to the ground as I shake my head, as if I were upset I didn't get to kill someone when really I'm wishing more than anything I'm not about to get defiled and killed.

Cato looks at me contemplating, tipping his head to the side as his large arms cross over his chest "yeah well then what about Gem?!" shouts Glimmer who glares at me form where she stands next to Clove. My eyes sweep back over to Cato's as I lick my lips then think up another lie quick, "well if you must know I didn't like the way she was looking at Cato" I feel sick as I watch a flicker of excitement swirled with delight passes through his blue eyes. Well I guess its better having it seem like a jealous little girl instead of a traitor. Cato smiles widely then lets his arms relax as well as his eyes return to there normal oiliness, he kicks the back I dropped towards the large pile of supplies "she's one of us. We can't fault her for being jealous" Cato puts forth smugly as he wraps an arm around my shoulders, leading me further towards the cornucopia "we should set up a camp here then go and search for some little tributes" Marvel puts forth giving me a wink as he scoops up a spear then jab it into the air as if someone was there.

We set up three tents and two makeshift ones from tarps, once I notice I don't have my own sleeping place I quickly start trying to fashion my own makeshift tent which I end up doing beautifully before it gets knocked down by an angry Clove, "whoops" she grits at me, eyes narrowed far more than I knew they could get. Before I can even reply a tightlipped 'its fine,' Cato walks over to us … well more accurately stomps over to us with a smirk on his fierce face "I don't trust her. She's gong to kill us in our sleep" even though Clove's comment is pretty realistic, I can't help but hate how she thinks I'd do something that disgusting but then again I did kill those two kids "but that was for Gale" the little voice in the back of my mind says making me feel a sliver bit better. "Fine then she'll sleep in my tent" Cato states almost vibrating with his pleasure as his eyes rank over me, from where I kneel next to what had been my sleeping quarters. I release a shaky breath before placing a small forced smile to my lips before nodding getting up and walking over to where Cato was setting up his tent, "I'm going to go make this campsite a little more homey" I say thoughtfully acting as if this was something normal, Cato gives me a leering smile as Clove glares at me and as swiftly as I can without seeming scared of Clove I walk over to Cato and my tent.

I help sort through the large pile of useful things as I discreetly as I can look around, taking in the woods around me trying to decide where I should run for whenever I get the chance. My eyes rank over the tree line as I wonder about where Gale is "has he found shelter or water yet?" I think as my eyes start to move back to the task at hand until I find a small bush near us that is covered with a bright pink flower I'm pretty sure will make even the strongest fall asleep if consumed. My eyes wander back around at all the careers who are surprisingly not looking at me so hesitantly I get to my feet and walk over to Marvel "you want to help me pick some leaves and some flowers to make a nice tea before we head out on our search?" I ask with a friendly shy smile which makes him all too happy to nod and stand up. He picks up a small tin container that he hands me, with a heavy heart I walk to the edge of the tree line with Marvel and start stripping some mint leaves and the green ones that I forget what there called, all I'm sure is that Gale said you could make tea with them so I'm relying on him slightly well that and that they don't suspect I'm up to anything.

While Marvel's back is to me I quickly strip a handful of the pink flower petals that I hid under the mint and tea leaves. "Alright this should be enough, right?" Marvel asks coming back over to me with an arm full of leaves making me chuckle slightly even though I really don't want to. As Marvel and I make it back over to the others I spot that Cato is still having a quiet conversation with Clove, so at least she didn't see us and can't possible throw suspicion my way, "can you be a dear Marvel and get me some water please" I grin up sweetly at Marvel, praying at least I'm pulling off flirting since I'm not at all good at it, you have to have the courage plus like someone to do that and the guy I like hates my guys, present tense.

With Marvel away and the other careers busy with their own things I quickly ground down all the pink flowers I can then do a large amount to mint and tea leaves as well before quickly mixing them together before placing them ones I've grounded back into the metal tin Marvel had handed me as I see him reappear and caring a canteen. Marvel makes a small fire pit which I quickly set the leaves and rose petals drowned in water over the fire for it to cool properly. While Marvel and I wait for the tea to cook we search for drink wear fro everyone which we find, in the ten empty canteens. Not to long later everyone comes to sit around the fire Marvel has made while we pass out the tea, me having ot keep my forced smile on the whole time, acting as if these blood hungry people were my friends. They all drink their teas without a though, all but Clove who stares at me so begrudgingly I pick up my cup of tea and quickly drain it and release a small relieved sigh as I see Clove do the same. Now all I have to do is come up with an escape plan as well as how to get this concoction out of my system before I pass out and am stuck with Cato for even longer.

After all of us grabbing a weapon to use we slowly make our way into the woods and start searching for other tributes tom murder. I don't know how long we've been walking but I'm thirsty and getting sleepier by the second and from the slowing pace of everyone else so are they, "you just got to outlast them and somehow throw this up" I think trying to widen my drooping eyes. We come across the small girl from nine, who pleads through tears for us to not kill her Glimmer wastes no time at all before sloppily shooting an arrow at her which misses, thank god. But the knife throws at her doesn't. I follow the careers away but then stop as I run into Cato's sturdy back "sorry" I groggily mumble as I rub at my eyes roughly trying to keep them open. "The canon did go off" Glimmer says giving Clove a smug smile "I know where I hit her, she's dead" Clove grits back, her little hands are formed into fists at her sides as he eyes flutter about wanting to close. "This is your chance" the small voice in the back of my head said making me physically nod my head once before clearing my throat then licking my chapped lips "I can go check" I stat making all of them turn to face me, they look at me for a few seconds and I can tell that almost everyone but Marvel is going to reject my offer but before they can I smile a little brighter and look up at Cato with large eyes "it will show I'm with you guys" I make know, trying to keep myself from shaking with fear as I feel another sleep stone settle inside me, "fine but make it quick and this better not be a trick or so help me…" Clove puts forwards as she leans sleepily against a fallen tree branch. I nod once giving her a smile then start to turn before I'm stopped by Cato "don't make me regret sticking up for you Madge" Cato whispers out for only me to hear as his eyes too fight to slay open.

With precise steps I make my ay back to the girl, trying to formulate another plan "maybe if the girls okay I can help her with her wound then tell her to run" I think then my mind goes blank as I see the small raven haired girl laying in a large pool of her own blood, that is seeping out of the side of her opened neck and without my permission my body heaves over and I puke up everything in my stomach until I'm dry heaving. I'm frozen by the paleness of the girl and of how dead she looks but the small bearily even there raise of her chest tells me she's still alive so I stumble back to my feet and move over to her. Just as I reach the girl from district nine she looks up at me with foggy looking green eyes that tear at my heart, "mommy?" she chokes out, her blood chocking past her lips. Somehow her blood ends up splattering on my right cheek from her one word and I can't even bring myself to wipe it away, instead I crawl closer to the girl then pull her into my arms and brush her matter black hair from her face not caring as her blood soon cakes my hands and fingers.

I shush the girl as I try to keep my tears at bay which works for a while until I think about how she's going to die alone without anyone she loves. Without a single thought occurring in my head I start humming letting my tears fall down my cheeks then I'm choking back silent sobs "your fine. Your going to be just fine. You made us so proud sweetie, I'm so glad your home" I choke out, my hands tremble as I watch as the life slowly leaves her eyes then I'm openly sobbing clutching the girl to me and before I can think what it might do to me I press my three middle fingers to my lips then raise them to the sky, silently saluting the girl I helped kill. After I get myself to stop crying I use my coat sleeve to wipe at my eyes, that still feel really sleepy.

I stumble back towards where I had been with the careers and almost cry from sheer relief as I see all of them passed so quickly I snag up the bow and arrows from glimmer, then even quicker steal her shoes and some knives from Clove and I'm stumbling bac through the woods hoping I don't run into anyone or anything as I try to find a safe place for me to pass out instead of passing out in the open. I manage to climb up in a tree and position myself in a slightly sitting, slightly leaning position. "I hope I'm still alive in the morning" is the last thought I have as my ears hear a cannon fire and the next thing I know everything goes black.


	8. Chapter 8 Allies and Mutts

*Author note- Sorry about the short chapter guys just really busy today, but I promise to make it up to you all tomorrow with a longer chapter :) Thank you all so much for all the view and such it means a lot. Like always enjoy, review, and please forgive any errors I've missed :) -007twihunger xoxo

**_Chapter Eight: Allies and Mutts_**

The first thing I register when I wake up is how much my left shoulder hurts along with my whole left side of my body. A whimpered groan leaves my lips as I turn over and lay on my back and off my hurt left side. "Your fine" I think squeezing my eyes shut, not wanting to open my eyes from fear of seeing anyone … or something that wants to kill me but hesitantly I pry open my eyes and take in the floor of the woods around me. Then with a heart sinking realization I remember where I pasted out, up in a tree. My eyes fly up to the large tree I had clumsily climbed, I can't help but thank my lucky stars that I hadn't died or been impaled from my fall but instead just have a pretty sore left side. I try to move my arm but stop as a sharp pain burns around my shoulder area which makes me gasp out loudly in pain as tears spring to my eyes. I've never actually hurt myself like breaking any bones or anything so I'm not too sure whats wrong with my arm until I see that my arm is laying on the ground "you've gone and dislocated you shoulder dummy" I think as I slowly try to move my messes up arm more towards me as I try and force myself not to cry "don't look weak!" I think on repeat pulling my arm close to my chest as I sit up and just as I'm about to take in a better look of my surroundings I hear from behind me "oh thank god your okay." My neck hurts as I jerks it to the side to see who was there and release the breath I hadn't known I was holding as my eyes find the small fourteen year old boy from district four.

His green eyes stare at me with a mixture of fear and concern, neither one of us moving. Me from the ground and him from where he's half viable with a large pile of sticks and twigs in his arms "I'm not going to hurt you" I finally manage to say once I find my voice, he nods like its obvious but I don't miss the look of relief that passes over his face and how his shoulders drop some. I watch as the boy from four walks awkwardly over to me and stares while trying to make a fire which isn't that good to be perfectly honest but I think it has more to do with him keep glancing at me rather than lacking that precise skill. "I'm Madge by the way" I put forth lamely giving him a small smile, "hi Madge. I'm River" River replies, his cheeks tinting pink with a slight blush. "Why did you umm … why did you help me out when that girl from two was going to …?" River questions lowly before trailing off, his eyebrows furrow and he looks slightly pale jut thinking about no doubt how Clove almost killed him. I'm not sure really why myself until I catch the innocent scared look he gives me which immediately makes me think of little Rory Hawthorne, which has my throat tight as my thoughts quickly turn to Gale. "Oh my god is he okay? How long have I been knocked out?" I think frantically, my eyes sweeping across the ground. Then my eyes are meeting River's, "you remind me of Gale's little brother … The one he volunteered for." I put forth trying to keep myself from bombarding this still frightened looking boy.

"I'm going to need you to a very brave thing for me River, can you do that for me?" I say after a while of maddening silence, River looks up from his makeshift fire pit he's trying to rearrange. His small head bobs up then down quickly as he stares at me, "I'm going to need you to pop my arm back into place" my words linger in the air between of us, River swiftly turns his attention back towards his work, really just staring at his slightly shaking hands before he whispers in a scared pained voice "I don't want to hurt you Madge" which causes my heart to swell with some happiness that at least I have made a friend in here I guess. I shake my head vehemently causing my blond hair to swish around my face and shoulders, not caring that I still have twigs and leaves in it. "No you won't I promise! You'll be helping both of us, think how easier it will be for us once my arms back to normal" I state holding my arm to my chest praying that River will just suck it up and pop my shoulder back into place. He stares at his hands so more, picking some dirt from underneath his fingernails, "you … we're allies now, then?" His question takes me slightly back but before I can even think his words through I blurt out what my heart is telling me to say "of course we are River" my words make him smile then he nods uncomfortably "I'm only doing this because we need to be at our best, incase we run into the careers" he states like he has to point out that's the only reason he'll hurt me "you know Finnick told me not to hurt you and that if I ran into you try and get you into an alliance" he puts forth as he helps me up to my feet. We walk over to one of the trees, with only moderate hesitancy I place my hand on the tree and hold it there with all my strength ignoring the pain that makes me grit my teeth then as fast as it probably came out my shoulder pops back into place. "Thanks" I mumble weakly, rubbing my shoulder which still feels weird slightly. I'm not sure if I should ask what Finnick all told him about me or lack to tell him.

With my shoulder back in place I can't help but take over the leader position, wanting to take care of River like I know I would have taken care of Rory. I make him help me reposition the sticks and twigs he got so that the smoke won't billow out and reveal our positon, just like the instructor at the fire station had taught me. I don't say why I'm making him know how for a certain how to do this because i know we both know its incase we get split up somehow. "We need to look for some food" I state wiping the dirt off my hands onto my pants as I quickly get to my feet then offer my hand to River who takes it without a thought, "hey Madge … can … can I ask you a question?" I glace over at my ally then hesitantly nod for him to continue as I look back in front of us, searching for some type of plants, berries, or animals we can somehow make into a filling dinner or lunch for us. "And you won't get mad?" he adds on as an after thought, his green eyes side-glancing me as I start stripping some blackberries from a nearby sticker bush. "And I won't get mad" I reply solemnly giving him a genuine smile before knocking my shoulder to his before I start plucking more berries and placing them into my makeshift basket which just so happens to be the bottom half of my shirt. "Why did you kill those two tributes? I mean I know we're supposed to kill each other in all but…" my hand freezes in midair at the unexpected question, even though I can't fault him from asking such an obvious question. My hand drops and so does my eyes, tracing over Glimmer's shoes which happen to be a bit too big for my feet. "I wouldn't have been able to do that if it were you, Rue, or Gale" I confess shifting on my feet awkwardly at my confession before I add on "I didn't want to have to kill them but I'd rather me take that on my conscience than on Gale do it, I want him to go home … no offence" River gives a shrug leaning against the tree next to me then snags a berry and pops it into his mouth "I was kind of hoping all that I like Gale stuff was fake, not even in the hunger games do I have any luck with love" River puts forth jokingly, his cheeks red with a blush from his confession "I don't think I'll even not love him … I mean I know it will be while I'm in here because I'm not going home … I just couldn't live in a world where he didn't exist. He hates me I think … not for me but because he thinks I'm some spoiled brat who thinks she's better than everyone else" I blurt out, feeling pleasantly surprised that I'm this trusting in River and having just met him not too long ago.

We're quiet for a few minutes just us plucking berries and plants I point out before River's calming voice pieces the comfortable silence we had found ourselves in. "Gale's an idiot if he doesn't like you Madge" my cheeks heat with a blush from River's words and so does his. I chuckle then turn and kiss his cheek making his cheeks go even darker "you are too sweet River, if only you were sixteen instead of fourteen" I say giving him a smile, which he returns. I toss a berry at his barely missing him and causing us to both laugh. "Age is but a number Madge" River states giving me a playful wink which throws us into another fit of laughter. I can't help but be happy that I was able to meet River even if it is in the hunger games, at least I was able to meet someone who I can be friends with if only for a while. River and I work well together, collecting all we need to have a somewhat filling dinner as well as some makeshift shelter, but thankfully River was able to grab a backpack after I Saved him from Clove. In his backpack was a sleeping bag which looked big enough to fit both River and me, an empty canteen, some water treatment drops, a pair of sunglasses, three matches, what looks like a reflector tarp, and a small loaf of bread.

"How long was I out when you found me?" I question later that night as River and I quietly work together setting up some safety precautions, in the form of some traps. "Not that long. I was following you … After you saved me form the girl from two I was convinced we should become allies. Plus what Fin said and with what you did for your district partners little brother when his name was called" River makes knowns gazing up at me for a second before looking back down and finish tying the knit he's working on. "I was waiting for you in a tree but then they got you and … and I thought they were going to kill you but no they made you a pal but then I seen you sneak those flowers or whatever so I stuck around a little longer and you should be happy I did. I seen the careers start dropping like flies then the next thing I know your falling out of a tree and almost smashing into me. You were only out like three hours tops" I nod biting my lip as I think about what to ask him next but before i can he speaks again "how do you know Finnick?" my eyes fly up to River's green ones before looking back down at my own knot and slow down my fingers working pace so I won't have to look up too soon, "I'm the mayors daughter of district twelve, so I get to be up close and personal with all the victors coming around on the victors tour" I shrug not wanting to go into a rather embarrassing story of how I met Finnick back when I was twelve. Thankfully River just nods and drops it as we continue to finish off the traps we're working on.

I make Rive and myself a dinner of bitter tasting dandelion soup with some blackberries spread across some bread and some fresh water from a small spring we found a few meters off from us. "Did the careers question you about you liking Gale or whatever?" River yawns scratching the back of his head as he unrolls our sleeping bag underneath the small shelter I made from the reflector, which is just really the reflector wedged between two rocks so it will keep our heads dry incase it rains while we sleep. I zip my coat up further then pull my socks up so there's not any gap for the cold air to get in and get to my skin, "I think they were going to question me later on in the day, probably when they could manage to think up some questions" I say giving River a shrug of my shoulders before motioning for him to zip his jacket up further which he does after rolling his eyes at me and muttering "yes mom" I shake my head and try to suppress a smile "its Madge River" I say teasingly making him crack a smile at me as he crawls into the sleeping bag, not too long later I crawl in after him and zip us in.

It's a snug fit but hey at least we both know we won't freeze to death. We lay silently just listening to the wind howl around us when all of a sudden the anthem blares and my heart stop as does my breath catch in my throat as I pray I won't see Gale's face in the sky. The first picture is of the girl I killed from three I think both Clover and Glimmer called her Gem, then the guy from five, the girl from six, the guy from seven, and then both the tributes from district nine. I release the breath I was holding silently thanking god that Gale is still alive. "Wonder if he's happy I'm alive?" I think as I feel River turn, resting his face very close to my hair "you smell good Madge" he mumbles sleepily before I hear light snoring from behind me which makes me smile slightly. I lay there for a while long before I let the goodness in me override the smartness in me, I press my three middle fingers to my fingers then hold them out towards the sky before whispering "I'm so sorry," I close my eyes then snuggle deeper into the sleeping bag letting myself get comfortable as I take first watch since I'm older than River and I've slept probably enough from getting knocked out by my own scheme.

My thoughts all surround a certain, somehow almost always scowling seam boy. About what he's doing, if he's thinking about me or Katniss, if he feels bad about pushing me and the things he's said to me know he knows I love him. But I know it doesn't help or even change anything because we'd still be here in the hunger games fighting for his life. Just as my eyes start to get groggy I hear an almost soundless rustle of leaves then the next thing I know something is stabbing into my still sore left shoulder making me scream out in pain as I forcefully yanks ne free from the sleeping bag. I hear River scream my name and him stumbling around looking for something before I can't hear anything at all. I feel is this strange fiery pain that is somehow numbing and then my scream cuts out just as my eyes roll into the back of my head and I'm consumed with nothingness.


	9. Chapter 9 Girl on Fire, on Fire

*Author note- It's beyond crazy how many people are reading this, its surreal. Thank you guys so freaking much :) you guys are beyond words amazing. Like always I hope you like this, review, and please forgive any errors I may have missed.

**_Chapter Nine: Girl on Fire, on Fire_**

"Please be okay, your okay. Madge please just open your eyes … please." I hear a distant voice say through … tears? It takes me a little bit to realize that the voice I'm hearing is River and then I'm forcing my heavy eyelids open because now I know I'm still in the hunger games and not home. My head hurts but not as bad as my left shoulder which seems to ache continuously. River has my head in his lap and is brushing my hair down my back, "whats going on? What did I miss?" I question, my voice sounds really hoarse even to my own ears. River's head snaps up and our eyes lock for a minute, my tired blue ones to his red rimmed green ones. Then the next thing I know River is squeezing me to him tightly in a hug and I feel wetness on my neck as he buries his face into the crook of my neck and I don't know what to do or even why he's so upset so I just hug him back tightly, trying to comfort him in anyway I can. That is until I see the practically shredded and bloody sleeping bag we shared last night, I feel sick beyond words remembering how something attacked me and this alone makes me slightly rethink how I'm using what the President had me learn against him and his stupid game "but it wasn't on purpose" I think as my heavy arms drop to my sides.

River hugs me for a while longer, until he stops crying then he pulls back from me and starts picking at the dried blood caked on his hands which make my stomach turn at the fact he might be hurt but the way his hands shake and how he avoids looking directly at me in know its my own blood. "What happened?" I try once again to ask, my voice still hoarse probably from my screaming when I got attacked. River drops his head even further not looking at me and making me aggravated that he's not telling me what happened to me. I let out an annoyed sigh then force myself to crawl over to River, eliminate the small space between us then I intertwine our fingers together and that's all it seems to take because the next thing I know River's body is wracking with sobs and telling me what happened through his sobs, "you … we were just sleeping and then you got jerked out of the sleeping back … at first I thought that the careers had found us but then I heard your screams coming from the tree above us. It was so dark … I couldn't see a thing but I manage to find those knives you took from two and as I did I noticed that those sunglasses that were in the backpack I snagged, they turned out to be night vison glasses. It … the thing that had you it was a mutt. It looked kind of like a mix between a sloth and an anglerfish … it had you. Its claws were dug into you left shoulder and it was biting at your left side. But I charged it and managed to cut its throat while it was busy trying to … trying to do you in" River's words leave me feeling numb. I'm not sure if I'm okay or even in shock, and before I can even try to think it through I'm once again being hugged tightly but River. I rub his back even though my left shoulder, my head, and left side hurt dully.

I just hold River for a while longer letting him settle down until he's not crying anymore but just sniffling, "you did so good, River. I could have died without you" I whisper into the early morning air, as the sun slowly starts rising in the sky. With more light for me to see I notice just how much of my blood is everywhere and it makes me want to throw up, its so much and I'm not even sure how I'm even alive right now until on word pops into my head 'sponsors' I feel angry yet relieved, but I'm not sure how I will feel when I actually know what saved me. My throat feels thick with emotions that I will not give the President the satisfaction of seeing, I clear my throat once then lick my lips "who sent us something?" I pull, my voice still sounding hoarse which makes me annoyed with myself. River glances up at me then hastily gets to his feet and retrieves the canteen then offers it to me before he starts gathering what things we do have together and placing them into our backpack. River's quiet for a while and I'm almost convinced I'm not going to find out from him until he lets out a defeated sigh, "It said I wasn't supposed to tell you … our mentors banned together to get us some medicine for you" he makes known in a quiet voice, like if he were to speak louder I'll get angry with him and this alone makes me feel guilty about being angry fro receiving medicine when I know it should be going to Gale where ever he is but the sadness I see on River's face makes it dissipate. "Thanks River" I smile then start helping him collect our things. I know that I can't be mad at Haymitch and Finnick for sending us medicine because honestly if they didn't then I'm almost absolutely sure River would end up being like Annie Cresta, that thought alone makes me vow to be more careful and observant of our surroundings. Not because I actually want to win these games but because I don't want River to watch me die.

After we gathered all our supplies, which isn't that much, River and I get into a slight disagreement about who should carry the backpack. He thinks he should since I'm still recovering from the mutts attack but me wanting to take care of River makes me want to carry it since I want him to have all the energy he can but after I realize River won't give in I grumble out a "fine you win" which makes him smile widely at me then pull the backpack onto his back. We walk for a while eating the rest of our berries and a slice of bread between us, we decide it will be safe to head back to that little spring we found to collect some water which it is, we add some treatment drops to the water before we're walking, looking for a better place to hide out. My jaw is clenched as my eyes sweep around us worriedly afraid of another attack from the Gamemakers or the careers, but honestly either one would be frightening.

River and I try as hard as we can to be quiet as we walk through the woods but the ungodly crunches of leaves and twigs underneath our feet won't seem to listen. "You know my district partner Gale, he can sneak up on anything. Its like he floats or something, he's so light and quiet on his feet" I put forth, not even sure why I said it and the look of surprise and confusion that passes through River's eyes makes me know he doesn't either and with that we're thrown into a comfortable silence as we continue our trek. As we're walking near a cluster of large rocks and off to the side of them, barely visible is what looks like a cave of orts, "lets check that out" I say jerking my head in the direction of the cave, River nods then follows closely by me probably still freaked out about me getting attacked and almost dying in front of him.

The cave is surprisingly big enough for bot of us and is closed off in the back a little ways in which means only one way in and out which makes both of us silently relax some. "You settle us in and make some of those traps I showed you so no one can sneak up on us while I go get us some food" I put forth in a tone that left River only to abide by what I've said, but that didn't stop him form frowning at me as he slowly starts unpacking the backpack to give it a look through. I give him as genuine as a smile before giving him a hug and placing a kiss to his cheek "I'll be back before you know it." I point out hoisting the bow and quiver full of arrows over my shoulder then placing two knives into my jackets pocket whole leaving the other three for River, incase he needs it. "Don't come looking for m if I don't come back … just wait here for a little bit longer and if I'm not back by morning I want you to move and find another place to hold up in. Never stay in the same place twice okay, they could find you that way. But don't worry I'll be back, we're a team remember" I add on knowing something could very well happen to me and if it did I wouldn't want River to get hurt just because of me. He gives me a hesitantly jerky nod before ducking his head and murmuring "be careful" which I reply with "I almost always am. You too," then I'm making my way as stealthy as I can out of the cave, making sure no one or nothing sees me because honestly I'd rather me get hurt or killed instead of River, who is beginning to feel like a little brother of sorts.

I waist no time before I start setting some snares hoping beyond anything I'll catch some meat. My stomach hurts and its strange since never a day in my life have I had to worry about food, and this makes me respect Gale and the other people from the seam way more. When my thoughts switch to Gale I can't help but make sure I try to do all my snares as best as I can, so he'll be slightly impressed with how I'm able to make them even if I am a townie. As I walk further and further away from River I make sure to make myself pay attention to my surroundings so I'll know where I should go, from the large strangely twisted shaped elm tree to the mossed rock which looks slightly resembles a smiley face.

When I come by a small pond I can't help but run over to it, only stumbling twice on some slippery rocks. I hastily take off my jacket and starts trying to get as much blood from it as possible, and as I do this I take notice of the blood all over my left arm down on to my cargo pants. I stare at the blood caked under my finger nails as I rub my jacket against some stones before I pull it from the water and set it beside me on the bank before I begrudgingly undress until I'm left in my cotton black undergarments then without a though I hurry into the water making sure to stay where I can touch since I can't swim. Frantically my hands and nails dig into my skin trying to remove the blood from my body until I'm left with cold raw skin and only then so I slowly wad back to the bank and begin got clean off my clothes. I manage to get a lot of the blood out but since the blood set in enough it is stained into my cargo pants and slightly into my jacket. I lay out my clothes to dry and just sit on a large rock staring at the fallen log which my clothes rest upon and because I can't help myself I bury my face into my knees and cry. I wasn't supposed to get this scared of almost dying, I was supposed to have except it and just deal with it but I can't. I don't want to die and I certainty don't want Gale, River, or Rue to die either … hell I don't even want Cato or Clove to die.

After letting my clothes dry some I quickly pull them back on not wanting to give any type of peepshow to the sick audience no doubt watching me. As I'm pulling my jacket back on my fingers brush over the gold pin attached to it that I almost forgot I had, because my head is faced down to look at the pin my hair falls in my face and I almost lose it again seeing the blood matted into my blond hair, making it a strange strawberry color. My eyes linger on the pin for a while longer before I get to my feet and walk back over to the pond, where I cup water in my hands then dump it onto my hair making the blood slowly come un-caked until it is nothing and I'm left with slightly damp tangled hair that hangs slightly plastered to my face.

I manage to pick some roots and some plants I know we can eat, as well as some berries as I try and walk as silent as I can, channeling my inner Gale. I pop a mint leaf into my mouth trying to stop the slight hunger I feel in the pit of my stomach as I continue to scavenge for food for River and myself, when I come across some mockingjays singing overhead on a tree. I can't help myself as I stop and look at them with awe clear on my face. I hadn't realized how much I've missed my piano and its music until I hear them singing. Not being able to help myself I glance aground myself making sure no ones there before I hum a few tones, which make the mockingjays go silent for a few seconds then they're singing back my tune making me grin widely and just as I'm about to hum a new tune I hear a snapping of a branch then the next thing I know I have knife posed ready to throw at the wide eyed little twelve year old girl from eleven, Rue.

Her eyes are wide from where she has accidently fallen out of the tree and is sitting scared on the ground, almost immediately I drop my arm then even faster stuff the knife back into my pocket before holding my hands up in surrender as I walk closer to Rue, "I'm Margaret, but everyone calls me Madge … you can call me Madge if you want. Are you okay? I promise I won't hurt you" I put forward, trying to move as slowly as I can towards her like she's a wounded animal but then as if realizing what I'm doing I release a sigh and slowly drop to the ground a few feet away from Rue, who just stares at me quietly probably trying to figure out what to do. I awkwardly push my hair out of my face and over my shoulders, Rue's eyes catch on something and she visibly relaxes some more "you know it may not be much but I have an alliance with the boy from four, his names River … if you want that is, you could join us. I mean it's nothing too extravagant like the careers but at least you won't be alone and you'll have us to help look out for you." I say giving her a small smile, she looks at me for a few seconds before nodding and giving me a small smile in return. I quickly get up then help Rue up and have to practically carry her since she twisted her ankle from me startling her.

On our walk back to camp I somehow manage to take down a strange looking lizard fox thing that was climbing a nearby tree, even though I'm not one hundred percent sure how to skin, gut, or cook it I place it under my free arm anyway and continue on our way back to River.

I freeze when we reach the mossed rock hearing a unmistakable sound of stomping feet coming directly towards us so I don the only thing I can, I thrust the lizard fox, the box, and arrows at Rue then silently tell her where to go and to tell River I sent her, "make sure you two stay quiet while I lead them away" I whisper looking intently into her large scared brown eyes "we'll be fine" I lie, giving her what I hope is a smile before pressing a quickly kiss to her forehead then giving he a nudge in the right direction, then with a large shaky exhale I start running as fast as I can and making sure I'm making as much noise as I possibly can and from the shouts of "I heard someone over there" I know they're hot on my trail. My feet stomp underneath me was I run, forcing myself to run even faster even though my throat and lungs burn from the over exhaustion I'm pressing my body to work.

Just as I round a bend my foot slips on a somewhat wet rock and I fall hard, smashing my already banged up side onto the ground and the few dozen rocks that are scattered along it. But as that happens so does a large fireball shooting at me but my fall made it miss me by mere seconds. Even though I can hardly breath from my fall combined with how hard I was pushing myself it run, I get to my feet and as fast as I can jog, start off again, but this time I'm making a zigzag pattern from side to side, not wanting anymore surprise fireballs to be shot at me. Before I know it the woods around me is incased in large angry flames and the black smoke billowing around the air make me chock and my eyes water, nevertheless that doesn't stop my feet from caring me forward, ducking and diving under trees to avoid being crushed and burnt to death.

I'm not too sure if the careers are still after me or if they got out of this inferno when they could, but I'm here stuck in the middle of it, racing about trying to get out. Another fireball zooms towards me but it narrowly misses me but I'm not so lucky with the one that follows it which clips me head on in my upper right thigh, making me cry out in pain and fall down, only to roll down the hill. My body gets smashes and stabbed by things as I tumble down it, not knowing when I'll stop and if I'll be alive whenever I do eventually stop. Twigs and branches yank and get tangled in my hair. My eyes are squeezed shut and my arms are trying in vain to protect my head as I continue to tumble down the hill, then the next thing I know I smash into a tree and am just laying still on the ground, panting with some labored. The sky overhead is clear and blue and gives off cheery vibe but I know that that's just what the Gamemakers want it to look like, to get us to relax some before they throw something our way.

I'm not sure how long I lay on the ground in pain but its long enough for me to pass out and I'm not too sure how long that lasts as well. All I know is that my dreams are filled with so much carnage and blood … but its not mine. No, it belongs to my two allies and Gale. They are being viscously attacked by not only mutts by the careers as well, I stand by idly screamingly unheard things as I struggle with my unmoving body, wanting more than anything to help them but knowing I won't be able to. I awak with a loud gasp and my wide frantic eyes searching around for the careers and mutts who had turned towards me as my dream came to its end. I'm laying flat on my back in a small clearing that is filled with posies, which makes a different Posy come to mind and with that her whole warm family. Slowly and gently I work my battered body up into a sitting position which makes my body scream with protest but I grit my teeth and ignore it, as I start working myself up into a standing positon and because I can't stop myself I grab a handful of posies which I smile at then slowly start walking towards where I think the cave, River, and Rue might be located towards. The burn on my thigh burns and I wish more than anything I could go jump into some water to ease the pain but I know that doing that could infect the burn since the water could be filled with bacteria, so I guess I have to wait until I get back to camp where there's hopefully clean water to pour over it.

My throat is dry and scratchy while my mouth feels like I've been chewing on cotton all day and the sun shining bright, high above me doesn't seem to be helping in the least, actually the quite opposite. My legs hurt … hell everything seems to hurt and that realization makes me scared for whatever the Gamemakers are going to send my way. Even though I need to worry about getting back to River and Rue, but I can't help but worry about Gale, and what he's doing. Is Haymitch sending him any parachutes or just wasting them on me? I cant help but feel a small swell of anger in the pit of my stomach thinking about Haymitch just using the sponsor money on me instead of Gale, even though I've already made it perfectly clear I want Gale to win. So not even thinking clearly but only about Gale's welfare I stop walking then search around me for a camera until I find one hidden between two branches a few feet away from me, "don't use any sponsor money on me Haymitch. It all goes to Gale! If I come out of this and he doesn't I'll do your drunk ass in" I say making sure my voice is loud enough to hear then for good measures I give the camera a narrowed look before I start walking once again.

I can't even express how happy I am when I see the twisted elm tree and smile face looking moss on the rock that I genuinely smile then make myself walk a little bit faster. "We should go search for her" I hear River's worries voice state not even trying to keep his voice down, which makes me roll my eyes and smile "she said to stay here and wait for her" Rue's quiet voice puts forth just as I make it to the edge of our cave, where River and Rue are outside of. River pacing in front of the cave entrance and Rue sitting on a nearby rock a few feet away from him "well I'm the one in charge now so I think we should go look for her" River states his voice sounding surprisingly in charge, "oh really? I kind of figured I was still in charge but if I should leave just let me know" I tease making River and Rue both smile. River rushes over to me and slams into me, pulling me into a bone crunching hug "stop scaring me like that Madge" River whispers into my hair before he pulls back from me and looks at me with watery green eyes, "I can't be left alone in here" he says lowly like he doesn't even want to hear what he's saying. My heart clenches with his remark and I can't help but fear when one of the three of us die, two of us will have to go through that then the other would die and then the next … and then Gale will go home to his family … to the girl he loves.

River shows Rue, how to build a proper fire like I've shown him, while I start trying to gut and scale the sloth lizard for dinner, which happens to be harder than I wish it would be. I make sure to hide how hurt I am or the large burn on my thigh which I sneakily pour some clean water on it which makes me almost bite through my lip with pain. But thankfully I'm to stop myself from crying out an alerting my predicament to River and Rue. I cook the meat over the fire like Gael showed me while River and Rue to fill the two canteens we have. I add a little bit of mint leaves and some berry juice after its done then gently but as fast as u can dish up our food onto some big leafs Rue found. I sit sandwiched into my allies eating our semi early dinner. "Do you really like that boy from your district?" Rue's small voice asks as she looks up at me meekly, I smile then nod as River scowls "yeah I love Gale more than I ever though I could. But I don't think he'll ever feel the same way about me … he is a diamond while I'm a measly piece of coal" I reply after a beat, my shoulders shrug as my eyebrows scrunch together as I stare at the reflection of the flames on the ground. I know their both looking at me sadly and thats not what I want at all. I don't want any pity for my love for Gale, I just want … I just want him to be happy, to live and be happy and I'll be fine with the decition I've made for him, even at the cost of my own life.

I hand Rue the rest of my meat seeing as she glances at it hungrily a few times "no Madge I'm fine really" Rue reassures trying to push the food back to me but I just ignore her "I'm full Rue, I'm not used to eating so much" I lie trying my best to pull a sick face, like I might puke. She looks at my face then down to the meat and nods guiltily before taking the food from me and eating … well more like inhale it. I feel sick seeing how hungry River and Rue are here in the hunger games that I want to shout, curse, and puke all at once, they are too young and sweet to be here. They should be able to live their lives until their bodies decide to shut down and no longer work, just like everyone should. "Whats your life back in district twelve like Madge?" River asks tossing his leaf plate into the fire as he looks over at me with a smirk, his green eyes sparkling in the flames light making me smile at him. I know we're not supposed to talk about what our districts are like or what goes on in other districts but hell we're already going to do what more can they do to us? I give River another smile before pulling my coat closer around me, leaning more forward towards the fire slightly, "well its rather quiet, I don't have too many friends so I'm mostly just spending time with my sick mother or playing piano" I say with a small shrug of my shoulders, both of my allies give e sad looks before River seems to realize what he's doing then almost immediately he's giving me a cheek "you can play piano? I wish I could. But we don't have a piano," River states scooting closer to me as he stretches his hands out towards the flames of the fire.

I knock my shoulder with River's then Rue's making them both laugh as well as me. "Yes I can. I can even teach you guys some keys in the morning" I put forth enjoying the view of the fire and the sun setting in the distance through some trees, with a sigh I get up then start gathering armfuls of leaves to make a decent bed for the three of us. My mind tries to decide on how best to move one of the large rocks from outside in front of the cave door, to make damn certainly that nothing and no one don't just happen across us. Rue and River laugh at me some more thinking I'm being silly about telling them I'll teach them some piano keys in the morning, but they'll see. After Rue's done eating I put out the fire then we head into the cave to get around for bed while I stay at watch at the front of the cave after pulling a rock slightly in front of the caves entrance.

Both River and Rue fall asleep before the death count, but thankfully I'm awake. The anthem blares then the fallen tributes faces show in the sky, my heart is beating numbly in my chest as I hold my breath and pray that Gale is alright. The first is the girl from four and I can't help but feel glad that River isn't awake to see her face in the sky. Next is the girl from ten and then the sky goes black which has me gasping slighting out of relief of not seeing Gale's face, "don't give up Hawthorne" I breath into the quiet night air. I settle into place against a rock as I sit on the ground, keeping watch from the slight opening of the rock in front of the cave entrance making sure we're not found.


	10. Chapter 10 The Calm Before the Storm

*****Author note- Sorry guys that I've been MIA for the past few day but I was sick and had a slight case of insomnia but now I'm grand and back to writing my masterpiece lol. You guys are amazing! Like always I hope you enjoy, please review, and please excuse any errors I've missed. -007twihunger xoxo

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**Chapter********_Ten: The Calm before the Storm_**

I can't help but feel on edge with the two day of complete calm and nothingness pass by, not a picture in the sky for the past two days and upon that I've let River and Rue talk me into staying at the cave for those two days. But today is the day I'm standing my ground and having us move and honestly I'd rather be the crazy overthinking worrywart instead of being stupid and thinking we'll be safe if we just stay here in this cave, only to venture so far to be able to collect food for my allies and myself. I sit snuggled up to River as we let Rue sleep in. Last night I made it perfectly clear not only to Rue but to River as well that when we were all awake in the morning that we would be packing up our stuff then leave to find a new place for the night. River is the one who doesn't want to leave that much and I know its because we've stayed here for a while now and still have not been found but that can only last for so long especially with there being no kills lately, the Gamemakers will be up to something to keep the games interesting. "Would you leave us if Hawthorne showed up?" River whispers lowly, if I hadn't have seen his lips move I would think it was all in my head but I did see them move. 

For the past two days River has starting to referring to Gale as Hawthorne whenever he's brought up, and honestly its cute that he's jealous of Gale. Its nice that he cares enough about me to want to protect me from the big bad seam boy even if its for no reason. I mean Gale's not going to just up and realize he loves me no matter how much I wish it were so. In many ways, River tends to remind me of Peeta and for that I'm thankful. They both are bright and cheery, plus make me smile and laugh when I don't think I'll ever be able to feel even a glimmer of happiness again. "No. River, I would never just leave you and Rue like that. If Gale somehow found me as well as actually wanted to forge an alliance with me, then I'll just have to make sure he knows its us three or no me." I put forth grabbing River's hand to give it a slight squeeze before let it go and rest my hand back in my lap. Out of the corner of my eye I see River release a sigh of relief, but still his shoulders stay tense. He clears his throat then links his hands together and stares at the ground, "if I was from twelve and I was sixteen … would … would you honestly give me a chance?" River asks. His eyes finally reach mine, there bleeding with emotion that I hadn't known a fourteen year old could have and this and the way his eyes bore into me has me flushing slightly from embarrassment of his question. I look down fearing that the cameras hid around the arena will pick up my no doubt bright red face. I try to think about River's question, and for the most part I don't think I have it in me to love anyone like I love Gale. Sure there are nice boys like, River, Peeta, and even Rye but Gale's the only boy whose ever made me actually feel something. 

Even though Gale is the furthest thing from actually loving me back I can't help that anytime I think about him my heart speeds up and slows down at the same time, I forget how I'm supposed to act and let him get a rise out of me almost ever time we argue. But I know I can't say 'no' to River since I can already tell how sad that would make him, so I stick to the closets truth he'll be able to deal with "I'm not sure, it would have to happen for me to be able to tell what I'd do, but maybe." I put forth, trying to ignore that my hands are clammy and sweaty from my nerves. River gives me a small smile before he quickly dips in and kisses my cheek and before he moves away from us he whispers in my ear "I'm glad I met you Madge" his words make my heard swell with happiness and I can't help but smile and chuckle slightly as I pull River into a tight hug mumbling back "I'm glad I met you too" before I pull back from him. 

We don't have to wait too long after that before Rue wakes with a small yawn as she rolls over, her big brown eyes locking with mine innocently "did I oversleep?" her tired voice asks as she works herself up into a sitting position. River and I simultaneously shake our head which causes us to all laugh. We hurriedly pack our things up into the two backpacks that we have then we cautiously on our way, me leading in front as River takes the back and small Rue in the middle. The sun seems higher up in the sky as well as just plain hotter than the previous days. Rocks crunch around our feet as we walk towards the small spring near us, trying our hardest to stay as quiet as we can in addition to keeping an eye out for any passing tributes near us. River fills the two water bottles while Rue drops a few treatment droplets to them as I stand stiff ready to try and protect my allies in case someone comes along, which I'm thankful no one does. 

Just as we round a small bend I freeze seeing a the girl from five fighting against the much bigger guy from ten and because I know he will turn and see us after he kills the girl from five I quickly pull out an arrow and notch it on the bow making sure I'm well in front of my allies I let the arrow loose causing it to become stuck in the district ten boys back, between his shoulder blades. He turns around almost instantly then quickly socks the girl from five in the face, knocking her out instantly. He slowly stalks towards me with glossy unfocused eyes, "run!" I shout shoving which ever ally of mine is closer to me. After that its like everything happens way too fast for me to comprehend. I turn and start running behind my allies however before my head straightens out I see the boy from ten start charging towards me, full force as his nose flairs. I move much slower than River and Rue since I'm carrying all the heavy stuff while I let them carry the light things. My emotions are bleeding together, fear and sorrow the main ones that seem to swirl inside my chest as I try to push myself to run faster. I can't hear anything besides the steady and loud thumping of my heartbeat and erratic breathing in my ears so I'm not sure how close our pursuer is until I slip over a tree root and tumble into the large spring. On my way down I see that the boy from district ten is so close to me and I'm scared beyond imaginable. I'm so paralyzed with fear I can't even come up with anything to do besides trying to scramble to my feet which I do before something slams into me from behind, sending me face forward into the water. I choke on some water then resurface from the water gasping loudly as I once again try to scramble to my feet however, before I can get to my feet someone grasps a handful of my hair and shoves me down into the knee deep water. I try and hold my breath as I try to use my hands and feet to push me back up to the surface but the boy from ten is way too strong for me.

"Oh my god, I'm going to die!" I think as I feel my lungs start to burn from lack of oxygen. My hands quickly leave the rocky, yet muddy floor of the spring and make a last effort chance at trying to find one of the knives I have but I'm not too sure now where I put them. My arms are too short to reach for the backpack on my back so I start searching on my person until I find not one but two knives in the pocket of my jacket, which I quickly yank free from the wet fabric just as my mouth subconsciously opens just as u stab the first knife into tens inner thigh which makes him flinch back from me and release me. Immediately I fling myself free from the water and stab the next knife blindly into him as I sputter and cough loudly. My lungs and throat hurt and my eyes burn from unwanted water making its way into them. My eyes try to blink away the water that seems to find itself trickling down my face as I blindly scramble up the bank, falling almost on my face as I do. I roll over then swipe my wet arm against my face, moving the water away from my face so I can see and the first thing I see is the boy from ten lumbering over to me and all I can do is start scrambling back backwards, but the long strives he takes are much bigger than what I'm capable of doing. The moment I see tens eyes flicker a little off to my left I know that River and Rue have not left so I already know that I need to take him down, its him or us. My eyes catch a glint of light from the blade of the knife sticking slightly out of his shoulder and before I can think of anything really to do ten starts running like a mad man at me. Out of instincts I want to run and try to hide from ten but then there's my allies who could get hurt or even killed. Without a thought of trying to save myself I quickly throw myself up onto my feet then throw myself at ten and grab ahold of the handle of the knife from his shoulder and pull. Ten has a tight grip around my waist keeping me in place with one arm as the other one travels up and then his hand locks around my throat just as I pull the knife from his shoulder making him grit his teeth and release a feral sounding growl. Tens hand tightens around my neck more and I can feel every reflex in my body as well as all my common sense telling me to grab his hand and stop him but I don't knowing I'll no way in hell be able to over power him in the least, but instead I force my self to stab the knife I've unstuck from his shoulder into his open neck making damn well sure I shove it into his throat as hard and as deep as I can as I start to see black spots that plague my vision.

I think I black out for a moment or two because one moment I'm being strangled and I can't breath then the next, I'm lying on the wet grass that seems to have various size and shapes of rocks scattered all around it panting as I try to catch my breath. The sun and sky look harshly too bright to me and causes me to blink my eyes excessively before I squint, looking around for my two stubborn allies who I spot not too long later half hiding behind a large a few feet behind me. I slowly sit up ignoring how my body aches with refusal. There's a throbbing in the back of my head that leaves my skin crawling. Half on my leg half on the wet ground lies the unmoving boy from district ten, blood seeping out of his neck and staining the calf's of my pants. My hands shake as I numbly push his body off me, my breathing feels slightly more labored and I'm not sure why. A few droplets of water splat onto my blood covered right hand, leaving a slightly clean trail in its wake making me instantly look towards the sky which is still bright and sunny, not a rain cloud in sight. I stare for a few more seconds before I reach my hand up and touch under my eyes, feeling wetness that tells me that I'm crying before my eyes move back to the dead body next to me as my hand drops to my side limply. I'm not certain with how long I just sit there staring at the boy from tens dead body, but it must be too long since both Rue and River come over to me. I can't see there faces from how I'm sitting but I see both of their boots then the next thing I know River crouches down in front of me and ever so slowly gently grabs my chin and forces me to look at him. His green eyes are filled to the brim with both fear and pain that he tries to cover up unsuccessful with worry. His Adams apple bobs in his throat as he swallows a few times then his eyes drop to the dead body before he's once again looking at me "you did what you needed to do okay? You save all of us … not to mention that girl" River puts forth in a calm low voice, like he's talking to a wounded animal and that alone causes me to start shaking more as my eyes dart down to the dead body then to my blood covered hands. I can't stop myself from letting out a strangled sob as my hands fly up to cover my mouth "oh my god" I think as my tears glide down my face quickly as I finally take in what these games have turned me into "I'm a monster" I croak out in a sob then the next thing I know River is pulling me into his chest as he hugs me tightly then I feel Rue rush over to us and hold my hand as she hums lowly running her free hand through my slightly tangled hair, "your not a monster Madge. You're the furthest thing from that" River breaths against the top of my head making me cry that much more, for the loss of who I am … or was. Of what I've done in the short time I've been here and of course of how I don't even try to talk the other tributes out of fighting, "not like that would matter. The Gamemakers would just send in some mutts to finish us all in if we decided to not fight" my subconscious says making my heart sink as my chest feels heavy with emotion.

Only when I've finally stopped crying does River let go of my hand but Rue doesn't let go of my hand for a few more seconds as we watch River wash what blood I got on him off. Numbly I get to my feet then stumble over to the spring to wash the blood off my face, as I wash my hands I see my reflection and take in the small bits of splattered blood on my face which I wash off hastily making my skin no doubt raw and bright pink as I scrub hard at myself, then its like I realize what I'm doing so I stop then get to my feet ignoring my wet clothes that rub against me uncomfortably as my shoes squeak with each and every step I take as I lead my allies back towards where we left the girl from five. "We'll check on the girl from five to make sure she's okay, then we'll settle down somewhere and eat brunch" I state to no one in particular as I nod a few times. Both Rue and River stay quiet and follow me the short distance back to the fox face looking girl from five, who is still passed out beside a boulder blood trailing out of the cut at the corner of her lip. "She looks alive" I think a I stare at her, slowly making my way over towards her. When I see her chest rise then fall I release the breath I hadn't known I was holding before hastily snatching the backpack off my back then searching through it until I find one of the two water bottles we have. Once I locate one I get back to my feet then crouch down next to five and gently raise her head so it rests in my lap then ever so lightly I trickle a few drops of water onto her dry cracked lips before recapping it and using my already wet hem of my shirt to dab at her head and almost instantly I'm back in district twelve and I'm taking care of my frail mother. I have to blink my eyes repetitively before I can see the red hair of the girl from district five instead of my mothers pale blond wispy hair, "we should leave. She's fine and that what you wanted to make sure. We can't wait around until she tries to kill us Madge!" River tries to put forth, to gain some type of realization to me but all I can see in this frail gangly girl is that she's just like us. She's scared, alone, hungry, cold, and wanting to go home instead of fighting to the death against odds piled against us.

After a few more minutes the girl from five blinks open her eyes before closing them then she opens them again and squints her green eyes up at me with a scared expression plastered on her pale face before she hurriedly scurries back away from me like a frightened animal, her eyes sweeping from me to River to Rue before back again to me. "We're not going to hurt you" I put forth in a hoarse monotone that makes me flinch when I hear it, I clear my throat as my eyebrows furrow but I don't look away from five's eyes "we're not going to hurt you" I repeat, trying my best to giver her a friendly smile but I'm absolutely certain it comes across as everything but friendly. I scratch at my forehead as I rest back on the heels of my boots, "I'm Madge, this is River, and that's Rue" I make known awkwardly pointing everyone out to her and still she sits mutely with wide green eyes that are fixed on me. We are thrust into an uncomfortable silence then finally five mumbles out "I'm Avery" I can't help but smile from our progress, I look over at River who is scowling and reminding me of Gale, which causes my heart to clench thinking about if he's still alive. I know River's not trying to be rude, but instead trying to keep Rue, himself, and me safe from what unknown dangers Avery might bring to the mix if we let her join us. "Your from twelve right" Avery's quite voice asks from her position in front of me, where she has pulled her knees to her chest tightly resting her chin in the middle of them. I jerk my head into a nod "yeah, that's me." I reply, plopping down on my butt and pulling my knees to my chest. The wind blows making me shiver slightly since I'm still wet but I ignore it "if you want you can join us but if you want to us to leave you alone then I understand" I put forth before biting at my bottom lip, trying to stop my thoughts from turning towards anything relating towards Gale.

Avery looks down at her nail which I can see have dirt underneath them. Her fingers hold tight to her pants making me unsure of what she'll say to what I offered up. Some of my hair falls into my eyes which makes me release an annoyed sigh before blowing the hair out of my eye. Wishing more than anything that I could just put my hair up into a ponytail or a bun but the lack of hair tie leaves me with just leaving my hair down. Avery's green eyes meet mine for a second before she looks down at the rip in her cargo pants near the knee as her fingernails pick at it then she looks back up at me "we'd be like the careers but weaker" Avery states in an cautious tone as her eyes look from me and River, I release an involuntary sigh before I jerk my head so I'm looking at River "cut it out. If she wants to join us then let her. She's not going to get us anymore heat then we already have" I point out as I turn to look back at Avery, who looks less pale then we found her. Her teeth bite at her bottom lip ass I'm so use to doing as she looks unsure at me "I guess you could look at us like that, but I'm not trying to make an underdog type of win here. I'm just trying to save my friends and myself as long as I can" Avery looks at me intently before she hesitantly nods, giving me a small smile "okay. I'll join you guys" Avery says giving me an almost giddy smile while I giver her the most reassuring smile as I can, without seeming like a crazy blood hungry tribute that I kind of see myself slowly beginning to be.

"We need to gather a brunch for us" I put forth, swiping at the dirt and grass that clings to my cargo pants as I rise to my feet then Iook over at River who is looking at Avery with some calculation playing out in his vibrant green eyes making me roll my eyes as I stifle a laugh. I glance over at Rue then silently motion to her to come over to me before I start slowly walking away fro both River and Avery. "River why don't you set up some traps around here and we'll stay for a little while until we catch our lunch then we'll move on to our next living arrangement, oh and why don't you teach Avery some of the snares and traps while Rue and I gather some fruit and plants" River looks at me sullenly but nods hesitantly before turning away from me and glancing at Avery more intimidating than I'd like, I roll my eyes giving Avery a small reassuring smile before I walk off with Rue to find some food.

Rue and I walk in a comfortable silence before we both stop as we hear a few mockingjays sing around us while hidden in the trees above us, Rue looks over at me but not really at me before she states "your pins the reason I knew I could trust you … well that and the about how you were protecting your district partners brother when he was the tribute" I look over at her and offer up a small smile before looking up at the canopy of the trees as the mockingjays continue to sing, the mockingjay flutter about, flying from tree to tree as the sing. I smile to myself feeling the first time since I don't know when content. I look back over at Rue, taking in her wide peaceful smile as she watches the mockingjays fly about and sing, "You know this pin was my aunt Maysilee's, she was in the quarter quell with my godfather … I mean my mentor … Haymitch. They were allies for a while but almost after they broke off there alliance she was killed by … by I think a mutt pink bird" I say, causing Rue to look over at me with sadness lingering in her large kind brown eyes, "that's sad" Rue puts forth in a whisper, almost unheard as the wind blows hard around us making everything that much harder to hear. I look at Rue for a moment more before looking back at the mockingjays fro a few seconds before lightly pulling on Rue's jacket as I begin to walk once again with Rue close on my heels.

While I gather some fruit and plants from the lower level, Rue elegantly climbs up into the trees and starts jumping around picking her own fruit from the trees making me look at her in awe, "you know you remind me of a little bird" I say which causes her to laugh and almost immediately I laugh with her before we're once again in a comfortable silence foraging.

Rue manages to collect about a dozen peaches and apples from the trees above while I manage to collect a few things of Katniss roots, some strawberries, and a few daisies. Just as Rue is climbing down the tree to rejoin me I spot a rather large tree lizard which I quickly throw one of my knifes at, effectively killing it instantly. I toss the lizard into my backpack as Rue crouches down pick up a bright blue wildflower that she hands to me. I smile at Rue taking the flower and twirling it between my thumb and pointer finger, "thanks little bird" I states while messing Rue's hair up slightly as I rub her head affectionately. Rue looks up at me with a beaming smile "I'm glad I got to meet you Madge. Your like a the older sister I never had" Rue states making me smile even wider as I wrap my arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer to me. "I'm glad I met you too little bird" I reply before pressing a quick kiss to her forehead before letting go of her and placing the flower she gave me behind her right ear before I make a face at her then start to take off "I'll beat you back to the others" I call over my shoulder, trying to keep my voice down enough so no one will hear me even though I'm lost in a slight bought of euphoria as I laugh, with Rue chasing me closely as she giggles.


	11. Chapter 11

*Author note- I apologize tremendously for not posting yesterday, I had thought I had but then I realized I didn't I guess that kind of makes sense since I was piss drunk at my cousins wedding lol but be assured I reaped the consequences with a hang over today lol. Once again I'm sorry guys. I hope you enjoy this chapter and please review as well as excuse any errors I've missed :) -007twihunger xoxo

*ps. I'd like to dedicate this chapter to my cyber pal Gale Lover who is having a little bit of a rough time. I hope everything clears up soon and remember try to stay positive :)

**_Chapter Eleven: Out of the Frying pan and into the Fire_**

When we reach River and Avery, Rue and I are thrust into an almost uncomfortable silence. River sits scowling on a fallen log as Avery sits in the same position as we left her, they both have irritated expressions on their faces and the air around them seems tense. "So we got some food" I say awkwardly walking over to a rather large boulder where I waste no time sinking down to sit on it, with Rue so close she's almost my shadow. River grumbles something under his breath that sounds a lot like "about time you got back" as he strides over to sit next to me while Rue occupies the seat on my other side. With deft fingers I quickly dig through my backpack and pull out the tree lizard I had shot and thrust it into River's arms, a little bit more roughly as I narrow my eyes at him "be nice" I quietly mutter making River scowl then roll his eyes "okay mom" I can't help but laugh at his reply, watching as he sullenly gets to his feet then heads back over to the fallen log where he proceeds to scale and gut the lizard. Rue helps me ration out what we collected as Avery slowly makes her way over to sit closer to Rue and me as she watches us closely. I don't know why I let this tense filled silence make me speak up since I've been in worse almost anytime Gale wasn't shooting venom at me with his words, but I do. "I never got to show you guys the keys to play the piano" I state passing a peach to Rue and Avery before tossing one over at River, who isn't really paying attention and gets hit upside his head which causes us to laugh while River scowls trying to hold in his smile, that quirks the corners of his mouth.

"After we're done eating then we'll cut down what snares and traps we set near here since we don't want to be freely feeding some other tributes. Then we'll go seek out a place to stay for the night and once we settle in I'll show you guys how to play the piano" I grin rolling my peach around in my hand before taking a bite which causes some juice to drip down my chin which I quickly swipe away with my still damp sleeve of my jacket, I place my peach into my mouth and keep a tight grip on it with my teeth as I take off first my coat then place it over a nearby branch before I sit back down in my wet clothes. I'm slightly startled by River when he walks over to me and quickly takes his jacket off and thrusts it into my arms "you can cover up with this while your clothes dry some" he puts forth lamely rubbing the back of his neck as his cheeks flame red from a blush, I smile widely at him then kiss his cheek before waiting until his backs turned before taking my shirt off and pulling on his jacket then I take off my boot, socks, and pants placing them near my drying jacket and shirt before settling in next to Rue and Avery who has taken River's abandoned seat. The wind that gently blows around us makes me both glad but annoyed at the same time, glad because at least I'm not as cold as I know I would be if I was still sitting around in my wet clothes and annoyed because nothings really stopping the cold chills and goosebumps all over my exposed legs and feet.

Once I notice Rue glancing hungrily every so often at the food Avery and I are placing in the our backpacks, making sure to placing the same amount in each one incase we get split up. Gently I toss Rue the rest of my peach which is barely even eaten, Rue looks at me with large brown eyes that are filled with disbelieve "no its okay Madge" Rue says quietly as she tries to pass the peach back to me but I move out of her reach giving her a playful smile "my stomachs not too hungry since…" I trial off, my words might be the start of a lie but then my mind seems to replay each and every kill I've made and almost instantly I feel incredibly ill. Rue looks at the peach before glancing back up at me and I know my face must look pale because she nods mutely then starts eating it which causes me to have a glimmer of a smile touching my lips as I settle back down on the boulder beside her. "Do you have any siblings?" I find myself asking Rue as a certain boy and his family come to my mind before being replaced by one of the tributes I murdered, Rue chews the bite she has in her mouth before swallowing and nodding her small head, causing her hair to slightly swish about "I have five younger siblings, four sisters and a brother" she puts forth with a small smile. I glance over at Avery then at River "what about you two? Any siblings back home?" River nods "yeah a little brother and sister" Avery nods with a thoughtful smile on her slender face, "yeah an older brother" she says softly looking at me and ignoring River completely, which makes me slightly annoyed that they somehow already don't like each other " I guess I could work on fixing that" I think. Just then a twig hits my arm making me glance over at River who is smiling slightly at me but it doesn't reach his eyes, which are filled to the brim with concern for me. I release a breath as I cock a questioning eyebrow at him, "what about you, do you have any siblings Madge?" River pulls. My eyes drop to my flame painted toenails as I wrap my arms tighter around myself, accidently brushing my severe burn making me wince and suppress a pained grunt. My head shakes 'no' vehemently causing my tangled curly hair to fly around my shoulders and hit me in the face a few times, "after I was born my mom started getting sick so they weren't able to have anymore children" I say with a shrug of my shoulders as my eyes flicker up to the sky as I feel tears brim my eyes with the thoughts of my parents and my very lonely childhood. Sure I had Peeta but that was only when we could hang out which was pretty scarce since I started my mayors daughter training when I was just five. I clear my throat of the emotional lump stuck in it before hastily getting to my feet and slinging the backpack over my shoulder mumbling "we should start looking for a place to stay for tonight" I notice the sad mixed with confusion from my River and Rue while Avery looks conflicted, like she's not sure if she should care about whatever made me upset but I just ignore their looks and plaster my mask back on, reveling in the ache my smile gives my cheeks as I start walking.

As we walk I can't help but think about the woods back home surrounding district twelve, wondering if it looks like this one. If its this haunting yet beautiful, filled with mesmerizing yet lethal animals like these ones. "I wonder if I asked Katniss if she would have taken me out there" I think then instantly feel angry at my supposed friend who couldn't even spare me a 'hey Madge I'm sorry your going to die but I enjoyed our quiet friendship while it lasted,' I clench my hands into fists at my side as I feel my anger build for Katniss. "Why would she just discard our friendship just because of the games? She knows I would never make her chose between Gale and myself but she did it anyways." Its like a snowball of bad thoughts all surrounding the girl who I had thought was my only girl friend but I guess I was sadly mistaken. I force myself to focus on my actual best friend, the boy who I wish I could have feel in love with instead of Gale. At least with Peeta I wouldn't be pained seeing him all the time with his best friend who everyone speculates he'll marry. As my thoughts start to swarm around my best friend I get angry once more, at Katniss for not giving him a chance, for being so blind to his affection. Of the pain he endured just to save her and her family. My anger starts to dwindle as I force myself to pay attention to the actual truth. Of how Katniss is so clueless about the many admirers she has and of how she is actually a very nice girl who loves her little sister fiercely, of how she alone took care of her family for the most part until her mom wasn't so sad with depression over her husbands death and all at once I feel disgusted with myself for even feeling mad towards her, "these games are changing me" I think as my hand subconsciously tugs at a strand of my hair, twirling it around my index finger as my bottom lip becomes ensnared between my teeth.

After a while Rue points out a large tree that has a slight opening which is pretty much hidden by some bushes. I look over at River and find him already looking at me and as I open my mouth ready to tell them I'll check it out while they wait, River beats me to it by stating rather hastily "I'll take a look inside there to see if its safe and big enough to fit us all in, you guys sit tight and keep watch" since I'm already staring at River I don't miss the look of concern he subtly shoots me that I'm almost certain he doesn't want me to see. Rue, Avery, and I nod mutely, watching as he turns his back to us and stalks over to the tree where he first sticks his head into the opening then next fully walks into it, we wait with baited breath for River to make sure the tree type cave is safe for us, while I casually look around us making sure there's not hidden tribute which thankfully there isn't. It doesn't take too long for River to reappears unharmed I release a sigh I hadn't known I was holding "its clear" River calls out to us, I nod then grab onto Rue's small hand and lead her towards the tree opening with Avery close on our heels.

It doesn't take us too long to get the tree cave into a good condition for us to sleep in and after we're done River, Rue, and I work on setting up some traps incase someone stumbles across us. Rue and Avery stay back at camp fixing up a fire the way I taught both River and Rue while River and I adventure out into the woods to set up some snares to catch some food since we haven't really gotten anything too heartily and filling in the past few days and mostly I'll give River and Rue bigger proportions of the food we do have so I know their at least almost full while I grin and bear it just like I use to have to do with my faux excitement of capital guests gushing excitedly about innocent children killing each other each year. River and I work close together setting different traps in a comfortable silence before River decides to break it. "Why did you let her join us? She's going to end up getting us killed Madge! We don't know who she is or what she's like, so how can we trust her?" River makes known as his arms fold across his chest as his eyes narrow fractionally and he lifts a questioning eyebrow at me. Instantly my fingers drop the small coil of wire Rue had brought with her when she joined our small alliance, I rise to my feet so I'm also standing then I mimic his stance save for the clenching of the jaw that he is now doing. "I could say the same about you, Rue, and myself but honestly River just because its a possibility it doesn't mean that its instantly one hundred percent absolutely true. You have to be willing to trust people … I know your scared of her getting us hurt of killed or that she will somehow gain us the attention of the other tributes but you got to realize I would rather die then to put either you or Rue in a dangerous position! I love you two as if I had known you years instead of days. Just … just please trust in my judgment of this, I've never been lead astray by my instincts and right now there telling me that Avery is good just like us" I put forth, we both stand staring at each other for what feels like forever but then finally I see River drop his arms from being crossed in front of his chest defeatedly as a tired sigh makes its way through his slightly parted lips before he crouches back down to the ground to continue on his snare he was working on and I follow his lead and do the same.

After we think we've set enough snares we stop and head back to our allies, River more hastily than me and I think its because he's worried about little bird Rue but I know how smart she is and that she would take to the trees like the little bird she is if someone was trying to attack her so I just keep my steady pace as I fight off the laugh that wants to bubble out of me but then I remember where I am and what I'm supposed to be doing along with these other tributes and just like that every ounce of humor leaves my body as I continue to trek after River back to our allies. I subconsciously slow down my pace as I take in the quiet scenery surrounding me which seems to lull me into a tranquility state, I immediately freeze "wait why is it so quiet?" I think as my unseeing eyes ignore the concern gaze of Rue and Avery and River convers something unheard to me. My eyes sweep around then I turn around completely and just then my ears are met with the very unmistakable sound of the cannon booming, stating another tributes death and even though it would mean one less person for Gale it doesn't register to me, no not at all. What I'm too busy thinking about is how close that cannon was, I turn back around and see the three pale scared faces of my allies and immediately motion towards the tree "climb now! Get as high as you can and don't make a sound" I demand as my ears listen closely as something rustles in the bushes close my me, however before I can react as we as just as River is pulling Avery up into the tree a large crash comes from our right and my eyes lock on the large unmistakable bright pink bird that stares at me as it snaps its razor sharp beak at me, its eyes only seeing me. The only thought I can think about is how I'm going to die just like my aunt.

The pink bird makes a ghastly shriek before it stalks towards me calculatedly before it makes a split decition to charge and yet I can't move, I'm paralyzed with fear. My mind only being able to replay the same scene I've seen a million time in the rerun of the quarter quell. Its like I have tunnel vision and my ears feel like there dulled down by water even though I'm standing here in the woods.

I can feel my body shake from the paralyzing fear as I watch the bird continue to charge at me before I force myself to close my eyes tightly, absentmindedly releasing a few tears, "I'm so sorry" I manage to get out in a choked voice and honestly I'm not sure who its directed towards, maybe its everyone or maybe its just all the people who mean something to me. Waiting's the worst part, knowing something like your immediate death only slightly away but not knowing when the critical deathly blow will hit you. My nerves get the better of me and just as I open my eyes I'm knocked to the ground by a pink blur and its stabbing at me with its ungodly sharp beak and for reasons unknown I find myself screaming for the one person who I know doesn't care about me. The one person who would rather a mutt kill me off so he wouldn't have to waste his time, the one person who I love beyond anything "Gale!"

The large pink mutt bird keeps pecking … well more like stabbing at me. First into my hands that are trying in vain to keep the mutt at bay as much as I can but then it starts stabbing at my arms and lower body as I grit my teeth refusing to scream, if this is how I'm going to die then I won't give Snow the satisfaction of my scared screams that will fall on deaf ears. I'm so surprised by the sudden stop of my attack that for a fleeting moment I think I'm dead, that is until I open my eyes and see that River is unconscious at the base of the tree as Rue sits perched on a high branch with tears streaming down her face but what really catches my attention is the fact that Avery is trying in vain to fight off the mutt and is losing, I hurriedly yank myself to my feet then run towards Avery and just as I pull out one of the knives I had forgotten I had while I was getting attacked the bird skews its beak through Avery's neck. And all I can see is red, blood red.

Avery makes a stomach turning gargling sound as she fights to try and breath with no avail as the mutt continues on its vicious assault on her and before I can really take in the situation and of what I should do I fling my small frame at the mutt knocking it to the ground with me on top of it. It tries to snap at me and manages to slice the side of my face and my ear but before it can do any real damage to me I thrust the knife into its neck just as it did to Avery as an almost animalistic cry sounds from my emotionally clogged throat as I let tears freely trail down my cheeks. Once I'm sure the mutt is dead I clumsily scramble over to Avery who is still struggling to breath as thick tears roll down her blood splattered cheeks, her gargling has gotten worse and I can tell she's in a lot of pain so when I gently stroke her hair out of her face I try to give her a friendly reassuring smile that I know must look more grim since I'm not choking back sobs that silently wrack my body, "I'll make everything okay. Just think of your happiest memory okay and hold on to it … your family is so proud of you Avery…" I choke out before I trail off not knowing what else to say to her. Even though her eyes are glossy with tears and are a mixture of pain and fear clouding them I can see her understandment and the gratitude she tries to send to me. Quickly before I loose my nerve I close my eyes shut tightly then even faster reach forward and snap my allies neck, filling the silence around me with a grotesque snap then nothingness. I hold Avery's still body to me as more tears fall down my cheeks then for reasons unknown to even me I begin to rock her and stroke her hair as if she were a small child who was just sleeping.

All too soon I'm brought back to the present as a loud cannon booms and it is closely followed by hard pounding of a few feet that are headed right for me and this alone makes me get to my feet then with strength I hadn't known I had I manage to shove River's unconscious body into our hiding place as I grunt out quietly "stay hidden and I'll deal with them" and even though Rue doesn't respond I know she heard me because when I'm done making sure River's well hidden from sight I look up into the tree and feel a stone of relief settle into my stomach as I note I can see her. My eyes sweep around me and I take in the dead mutt lying near Avery and my heart clenches with pain but I ignore it and push it away as I run over to its carcass and start pulling with all my might until its hidden behind a large bush then I swiftly make my way back over to Avery and rid my face of any tears before pulling out my knife, just as I release a small whimpered breath my heart about stops when I see the unmistakable faces of the five careers who sneer at me with glimmers of excitement filled in there eyes.

My eyes immediately take in them before I force myself to let out a little chuckle them amble over to them happily, a smile playing at my lips "I though I lost you guys for good. I've been looking for you guys for what seems like forever but I got lost" I state, adding on a look of embarrassment as I quickly duck my head and stair at my boots as I come to stop in front of Cato. I peek up at him through my eyelashes like I've seen many girls from home do to boys they like, both from the seam and town. Cato looks confused beyond doubt so I quickly pounce on that as I force myself to close the gap between myself and him and hug him, acting like he's Peeta even though just being this close to him makes me want to scream, throw up, not to mention has my skin crawling but I'm not too sure which one is the most dominant of the two emotions battling inside me. For a few agonizing seconds Cato is stiff and doesn't move until at last he slightly relaxes some then some more then before I know it he's completely relaxed and is returning my hug. I want to so bad release a sigh that he is buying my lie but I know that could work against me so I keep myself strictly as Margaret because Madge can't handle these type of people.

After a few more seconds tick by Cato and I release each other from the hug then he casually wraps his arm around my shoulders as his eyes twinkle with awe as he stares at the dead body of my dead friend, "you did a good job here twelve … I mean Madge" Cato says, adding on a wink at the end that makes me want to roll my eyes then punch him in the face for even acting like its amazing that someone is dead "she was my friend!" I want to scream at him but I know that won't do any good so instead I just smile and look down again pretending to be shy. My eyes meet briefly with the angry eyes of both Glimmer and Clove then the contemplating gaze of Marvel before my attention is pulled back to Cato as he starts leading me and his allies away from what's left of my alliance and towards only god knows where.


	12. Chapter 12: Chapter Twelve

*Author note- I'm so sorry for the wait guys but sometimes things happen that we can't control, like how I was basically blind for a few days because something scrapped up my corneas but hey I'm back and I can see and I'm ready to continue on with this fanfiction. Once again sorry for the long over due wait and for that long wait I made sure to lengthen out this chapter :) Thank you all for bearing the long wait and staying faithfully tuned into this little fanfiction of mine, it really means a lot to me, I love you guy and your all the best. I hope you guys like this chapter as much as I liked writing it, and like always please review and please forgive any errors I've missed :) -007twihunger xoxo

**_Chapter Twelve: Down the Rabbit Hole_**

Cato doesn't remove his arm from around my shoulders as we walk and even though it makes me sick and my skin crawl just having him touch me, I somehow manage to control the shake that wants to wrack throughout my body with just the mere thought of what Cato will do to me if he finds out I'm lying to him. I swallow thickly watching intently where I step trying my hardest to control myself from falling and taking Cato down with me, bringing more attention Cato and the other careers. As we continue to walk to god knows where, I can't help but get scared, was this really just Cato believing me and letting me come back to his alliance or is it instead him leading me to my awaiting death. My eyes immediately fly towards Cato's face, making my neck strain and hurt with how fast I move. He looks entirely too happy, not to mention very smug and that alone makes me even further paranoid and scared then I originally was.

Since Cato's strides are much larger than mine I have to try to move quick, all the while praying my clumsiness doesn't decide to trip me up and take Cato down with me, cause only god knows what that would make him do. My eyes sweep around, taking in the tall trees and the large bushes around the us as I make sure I don't trip as well as to try and make myself focus on the woods instead of paying attention to my frantic heartbeat that fills both my ears and chest.

From how the sun is perched in the sky I can tell easily that its around noon, which means I have eight or nine hours until I can try to run and get back to my actual alliance while the careers sleep, none the wiser of what I'll be doing in the least. "Yeah that's what you hope, but that doesn't necessarily mean that's how its going to turn out" my subconscious put forth making me swallow thickly, silently praying I'll be able to make it back to little bird and River without getting hurt in any way as well as without having any of the careers knowing what I'm up to and following me. I'm startled out of my thoughts when Cato stops walking which means I stop since his arm forces me to. Cato furrows his eyebrows then removes his arm from around my shoulders and not even a full second later he's smiling evilly and I have no idea at all why that is until I hear a slight rustling of a bush then someone mutters "damn it" before the slight rustle continues and before I know it the tall slender boy from eight walks into our sights. He immediately freezes when he sees us, his eyes rank over each and everyone of us with his large brown eyes before he takes a step back then turns and takes off at a full run, "get him!" Cato says excitedly and before I know it my hand is encased in someone's hand and I'm being dragged behind the smaller body of Marvel who glances over his shoulder at me briefly and gives me a look that says 'what the hell are you doing? Move your ass!' before he lets go of my hand slowing his pace then moves so he's running behind me and I'm left with nothing else to do but to run along with the careers, hoping beyond hope that I won't have to kill another person but with the suspicion of my disappearance from them I kind of know its only so obvious that I'll be made to kill him to prove that I really am one of them. "This is for Gale" I whisper to myself before I can stop myself but I don't think anyone could hear me since it was so lowly said.

The boy from district three is the one to catch the boy from district eight, by tackling him to the ground. My heart is pounding excessively in my chest and I'm not too sure if its from running or just because I'm going to be made to kill another person, but I think its more of the latter of the two and I'm proven right when Cato jerks the boy up by the back of his coat and shirt and practically drags the boy from eight over to me before forcing him to his knees in front of me. Cato thrusts his large sword into my chest making me look at him with wide eyes before I realize what I'm doing then I close off my face and smile at Cato like I'm flattered he wants me to kill this boy instead of showing how sick and freaked out I am, that I have to kill another person not to mention someone who isn't even trying to hurt me in the least. "Show them what I already know you are" Cato says with an oily smile that sends a shiver of fear down my spin. With deft movements I slowly take the sword from him and stare into the boy from district eights brown eyes that are glossy with tears, I look up and my eyes move around the careers watching them all watch me intently that there's no way out of this. I let out a slightly shaky breath before I raise the sword up and press it to eights neck making his breath catch in his throat as his tears finally leak out of his eyes making me feel even more like a monster than I was already feeling.

With my eyes I try to tell the boy from eight how sorry I am, abut how I really don't want to hurt him but its either him or me and I have two small afraid kids waiting for my return and I'm not going to let them down. I want so much to be able to close my eyes as I kill him but I know I can't since everyone is still watching me closely so instead I clench my teeth together and pull the sword back swiftly before sending it forward quickly and stabbing it directly into his chest making him scream out in pain and so much blood to seep out of the large wound I've just given him. He lays rolling around on the ground in great agony, screaming at the top of his lungs and I feel physical sick and scarred from this encounter but because I'm trying to be humane I jerk the sword from his chest and then thrust it back towards him again as hard as I can, but this time I strike him in his neck, making it slice through the skin of his neck like it was warm butter. The sword drops out of my hands and clatters to the ground mutely as I feel myself pale seeing the way the boy from eights head barely hangs onto his neck and that the once light of life I had seen in his eyes only seconds ago is completely gone and is instead replaced by the vacant death stare that tells me he's no longer alive. My hands feel sticky with the blood that splattered on them yet I can't move to wipe them, I just stand mutely staring at the boy I just added to my kill list until I'm snapped out of my own haunting thoughts by the loud cannon booming announcing eights death to the other tributes.

I'm so glad that the cannon sounds because if it didn't I probably would have let myself crack and really expressed how I feel about this boys death, but it did and I'm able to keep my cold hearted appearance up in front of these coldhearted, blood hungry careers. I numbly pick up Cato's sword then hand it back to him, making sure to give him a chipper smile even though I want to stab his own sword into him for making me kill some innocent person, "don't go placing the blame on him. You were the one who killed those two tributes before the games even started" my subconscious reminds me and I can't help but wonder if I've already gone crazy like Annie Cresta. "See I told you guys she was one of us" Cato puts forth with a large evil smile as he throws his arm around my shoulders and pulls me close to his rock hard body tightly, giving my hip a not too subtle squeeze which has me wanting to throw up from the look of lust in his hard eyes. I pull away from Cato acting shy as I duck my head a if I were blushing but I know its only because I know my face must be really pale because I know I feel utterly sick and disgusted with myself. The other careers don't say anything in reply to Cato, and I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not but I guess it doesn't really matter.

Cato has the boy from three search through the dead boy from eights belonging, which he doesn't find anything at all besides a pair of socks so with that we head off once again but unlike the first time Cato doesn't have his arm draped over me and I'm instead boxed in behind him by Marvel who will give me a small push to my right shoulder if I'm moving too slow for his liking, every so often. I can't help but release a slight sigh of relief seeing the large mound of food and things piled up high where they have taken up living while in the games, I don't know if I'm surprised or not that they still live here by the cornucopia but I do know I have to steal some of their equipment and food before I head back to my allies. Clove shoves pass me roughly making me slam into Marvel as she moves around me to talk to Cato quietly. I watch silently as they converse, praying to the gods that its not about me this time but the glances they occasionally send my way tells me other wise. I want to take flight and to not stop running until I find my allies but I know I must stay here and rough it out until I can leave secretly and unseen with the cover of night. Marvel gives the hem of my jacket a tug gaining my attention. He motions with his head towards a large fire I hadn't known someone started, I follow Marvel silently over to a large log and sit down next to him leaving a large space between us that wouldn't imply I like him as well as not seem like I dislike him as well.

"You know, you should think up some lie fast" Marvel mumbles from my side which gains my attention I look over at him and see he is poking at a log in the fire with a long stick. Marvel's not looking at me, so to anyone it would like we're both silent but his words tell me otherwise. I stare at him for a little bit before whispering back barely audible "what do you mean?" I'm not sure if he heard me or not but that doesn't stop my heart from jumping into my throat with fear, however before I can start internally freaking out Marvel glances over at me then turns his attention back to the fire, "both Clove and Glimmer are jealous of you, not to mention how you just up and disappeared or the fact you stated in your interview how you want your district partner to win instead of you" Marvel makes know, his lips barely moving as he talks and I know that its probably because he doesn't want to be placed in the same boat as me incase the other careers decide to do me in. Before I can reply once again to Marvel the boy from district three and Glimmer make their way over to us then not too shortly after that we're also joined by Cato and Clove. Glancing around the careers I can tell they're all staring at me intently and this causes me to want to shrink back but knowing how I need to look strong instead of weak has me ignoring them surprisingly easily.

I feel both lost and unsure about how I'm supposed to act or what I'm supposed to do so I just continue sitting in silence as I turn my attention back towards the flames until someone addresses the issue at hand, which I'm both dreading and longing. Dreading because this could be the difference between life and death for me, and longing because it makes me that much closer to being back with my little allies.

Faster than I anticipated but faster than I want Cato gets up from where he sits inbetween Clove and Glimmer then walks over to me, where he takes the open seat between Marvel and myself. Marvel glances up at me and for a second I see sympathy flash through his eyes before its quickly checked away and replaced by curiousness. "So, some of the other tributes in our alliance have worries that your playing us for fools, so we've came up with a way to fix that." Cato puts forth, causing my attention to immediately snap to him as I try to quickly think about what they've came up with that will make them trust me, which has my heart dropping with dread in my chest. I lick my lips and nod with furrowed eyebrows, not taking my eyes away from Cato's "what have you guys came up with?" I ask, surprising myself with how clear and unshaken my voice comes out but I don't have to marvel with how well I'm getting at not cracking under these much more strained situations than I'm used to dealing with back in district twelve. Cato smiles at me before reaching out and tucking a few strands of my hair behind my ear making me want to rip his arm off completely for even touching me, however I just smile shyly "well we want some answers to the questions we have for you" Cato puts forth moving his arms across his chest, making the short sleeves of his shirt strain against his large bicep which has me swallowing with fear as I imagine him strangling me.

I can only nod mutely as a lump forms in my throat, Cato looks over at Clove who quickly yet secretively puts up two fingers then after a small pause she holds up one lone finger which has Cato nodding before he turns back to look at me. My eyes stay locked with Cato's, refusing to let it show how scared and untrustworthy I'm being to them. Cato licks his lips as his eyes quickly yet slowly trail up my body which he can see pretty well since I'm not use to slouching but sitting straight no matter where I am, "your district partner. Is what you said true? Do you love him and want him to win?" Cato pulls looking at me intently. I force myself from looking down even though I so badly want to look away from his intense gaze, "Ga… Hawthorne is just my district partner, I stupidly liked him but I now know that that isn't enough to die over" I reply trying to look embarrassed by my confession I stupidly made accidentally at my interview. I swiftly shift my eyes around the careers, taking in their looks. Cato looks hesitant to believe me, Clove looks like she wants to shout some obscene words at me, and Glimmer looks sadly at me as she tugs at the bottom of her long braided blond hair that she has pulled over her left shoulder while the boy from district three looks suspicious. I'm not sure if I want to look at Marvel's face but I know he already knows I'm lying so I should definitely see if it sounds believable. Marvel looks at me and shakes his head slightly before glancing up at the sky then back at me, silently telling me 'widen the lie' I internally nod to myself before licking my lips once again then running my tongue over my front teeth. "If anything I want to kill that seam trash for making me look pathetic when we got back to our floor" I state in an irritated voice as I turn my attention towards the fire as I channel my inner Gale Hawthorne, with a small side of Haymitch Abernathy.

My hands fist into the ends of my jackets sleeves as I try to come up with something else to say but with no avail, I can't think up a lie in the least as my mind unintentionally flashes back to how Gale had shoved me into the wall and cut my hands open, I flinch both internally and externally not caring in the lease as my heart breaks all over again, of not being enough for Gale. Of him hating me for things I couldn't control even if I wanted to and the things that were the furthest from the truth he's sneered at me in the halls at school or when he and Katniss sold me strawberries each week on my back porch. "Fuck him!" I grit out channeling the hurt that fills throughout my heart into anger that I pretend to send towards my district partner, who I am still trying to save and make this years victor, even though I know what will happen to him after these games "its better than being dead" I think but then a certain green eyed blond haired boy from four pops into my head and his teary voice says "death would have been a better option if I had known what winning would bring," I clench my hands tighter feeling anger at what the capital … what President Snow does to all the victors who are cursed with good looks, who have the attentions of all sorts of capital people and their wallets. "Why should I treat him with kindness when all he's ever done to me is break me down over and over again … Cato the first time I met you, you showed me more kindness than my district partners ever shown me in the whole time I've known him from back in twelve. I'd gladly take my alliance and friendship from you guys than pinning over some poor seam boy who despises me" I say, talking in a somewhat circle since I'm not too sure what sounds good. My eyes switch over to Marvel to see him subtly giving me thumbs up as he pretended stretching his arms out above his head. I internally release a sigh of relief before turning my attention back to the main person who has the power to keep me safe or kill me in a matter of seconds. "So you don't like him anymore?" Clove counters agitatedly looking over at Cato with a wicked smile, like she's about to hand over a traitor to her district partner, who glares at her then their both looking at me intently. I'm not sure what I should say so I decide to go with what I know I can get off with as the truth, "I think a part of me will always have feelings for him because he was the first boy I've ever liked … until now" my voice is low yet string and I make sure to duck my head after my last word knowing Cato will think I'm talking about him like I want it to even though I know as well as Clove that I'm hopelessly in love with Gale and that's not changing any time soon.

"See! She admitted it. She could turn on us whenever lover boy shows up" Clove practically shouts from her spot next to Glimmer, her eyes glare at me and if looks could kill, I'd be keel over a few million times dying every second Clove sends glares my way. I open my mouth to yell at her and demand to know what the hell her problem is, however Cato beats me to it. "Shut up Clove! I'm sick and tired of you running your damn mouth all the time just because your jealous of Madge. She shouldn't get crucified just because she likes me as well" Cato's stern voice cuts through the air as he glares daggers at his district partner who doesn't relent her own glare she sends right back to him. Clove hastily gets to her feet then before any of us can react she throws herself at me, knocking me off the log to where I lie underneath her on the ground, trying to catch my breath but from how she's sitting on top of my chest I can't move let alone breath. Clove drops her face close to mine, only meters between our noses that keeps us form touching one another. I watch with wide eyes as her nostrils flare, her hand shakily holds a knife to my throat "I know your lying!" Clove shouts at me and before I can even try to react both Cato and Marvel move to get Clove off me but Cato get's to her first. He effortlessly pulls Clove off me but not fast enough because Clove had the time to drag her knife into my skin just over my collar bone, making me want more than anything to gouge her eyes out as I sputter and cough trying to catch my breath as one of my hands rub at my soar throat and the other is curled into a fist, wishing more than anything I could throw it at her face but I don't since Cato has already hauled her off towards the woods to have a private conversation.

The boy from three gives me a mirth filled smile as his eyes shine with disdain as he looks at me before he shakes his head and walks off, chuckling under his breath as he does. Marvel glances at the boy from three's retreating back before he glances at me then Glimmer then he mumbles "I got to take a piss" as he walks past me towards where Cato and Clove disappeared, and I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing. My eyes slowly glance over to Glimmer who I find already looking at me with a smile, she glances over to where Marvel has just disappeared behind some trees before she looks back at me then gets to her feet and walks over to me where she takes a seat on the edge of the log where I was sitting only mere minutes ago before Clove's attack. "You know she's going to try and kill ya right?" Glimmer says uninterestedly as she examines her fingernails, I grit my teeth from saying anything in return then I rise to my feet brushing the grass and dirt from my pants before I hesitantly walk back over to the log and sit down near Glimmer, who I see smiles at me from the corner of my eye. Glimmer and I both have blond hair and blue eyes. I know if she was from my district she would be a town girl like myself, but unlike myself I can tell she would be spending a lot of time over at the slagheap with a lot of other kids back in district twelve. "Clove obviously likes Cato" Glimmer puts forth as she turns her body to face mine while I release a sigh before position myself so I'm faced towards her as well. I pull all my hair over my left shoulder then absentmindedly work it into a fishtail braid that Annie Cresta showed me how to make when I was fourteen and she came to district twelve to visit on her victory tour. I smile to myself thinking about the girl from four who sat for hours just messing with my hair as we hid away in the attic from all the capital guest, how she would occasionally laugh for no reason or cover her ears and close her eyes tightly as if she heard something she didn't want to hear that made her seem younger than she really was as well as if she were crazy but in all honesty aren't we all a little crazy.

I watch as Glimmer looks down at my fingers working on my hair then she pulls an extra hair tie from the end of her hair which still has a black hair tie keeping her hair in place. She hands the hair tie to me giving me a friendly smile but I can see she has wheels turning in her eyes and I know she's trying to think of a way to use me for something in her benefit, I take the small elastic band from her and make sure I giver her a small appreciative smile before I fasten the elastic band onto the bottom of my braid to hold it in place. We're both quiet for a while, just the gentle breeze rustling the bushes and branches around us as the fire crackles. My mind wonders back to my two allies, I can't help but wonder if they're okay. "Do they have enough food until I return? Will they be safe while I'm away?" I silently ponder, my eyes burning into the flames of the fire as I gnaw at my bottom lip. "You can either leave Cato alone and Clove will chill out some or you can keep what your doing and sleep with one eye open but you'll have Cato behind you as well as us, since he's kind of the leader" Glimmer says snapping my attention right back to her, I watch her give a shrug of her shoulders then Glimmer's tongue darts out of her mouth and wets her lips as she glances around us once again, making sure no one is near. Out of habit my eyes dart around and for a second I think I see a familiar tall brooding boy at the edge of the woods surrounding the right side of the cornucopia but when I blink he's gone making me think "maybe I am going crazy."

Glimmer doesn't say anything else to me just gives me a look over and frowns slightly at my appearance which has me mad, "where the hell am I supposed to clean up at, we're in the hunger games?" I want to yell at her but I force myself to give her a small smile before I walk over to the large pile of supplies, my eyes sweeping around looking for any supplies I'll be able to steal alter tonight under the guise that I'm looking for something to place over my still bleeding collarbone. But before I can look to hard for anything something bumps into my left side hard making me stumble forward some from the sheer force of the hit. I clench my jaw and turn around seeing the boy from three standing behind me with a sinister smile playing at his lips that immediately makes my jaw unclench as I slowly take a step back only for him to reach out and grab ahold of my upper arm stopping me form going any further. He looks over his shoulder and I notice that Glimmer's nowhere in sight which has my heart dropping scarily into my stomach, His hold on my arm is tight and it leaves my arm in pain but I force myself to mask my face "what the hell are you doing?" I manage to snap at him as I narrow my eyes then try in vain to get him to release my arm with a jerk but he doesn't let go just rolls his eyes making me feel stupid. My eyes dart around once again but they immediately snap back to three when I feel him let go of my arm as he steps up to stand next to me, "there's a boy over there" three mumbles barely moving his lips as he does. I from looking into three's hazel eyes, he sees me then subtly juts his chin over towards the corner of the words where I see all too well a boy or maybe it's a man, hell I can't tell from how far away they are. But no doubt there standing practically in sight stands someone and I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do or even what to say back to three so I just stare at the stupid individual in our sights.

I must be so lost in my own mind just staring at the boy who stands a good distance from us because I get startled when three nudges my shoulder, I glance over at him with wide eyes as my heart hammers in my chest. He gives a slightly bemused, raising an eyebrow in question "Cato and the rest are back. We'll get mister sketchy and kill him" three states lightly yanking on the side of my coat as he starts to walk over to where Cato and the other's are making a reappearance, three lets go of my jacket then starts casually jogging towards them and I can't help but feel panicked "what if it really was Gale?" I think watching three continue to jog towards them. Just as the boy from three slows his strides and I immediately turn around and scoop up the first thing I find which is a bright red and black. I somehow manage to get the backpack on my back as I start running towards Gale as fast as I can possibly go screaming "run Gale!" I ignore the sound of shouts and stomping behind me and instead force myself to run even faster even though my lungs burn in protest. I'm scared to look back but that soon changes when I hear something whizzing by me which has my heart beating even faster. I turn and take in the careers running after me and that Clove is throwing daggers at me, "great" I think turning back around. As I get closer to the tree line I hear a very distinct voice, a very distinct voice that definitely wasn't Gale. No this voice belonged to a different boy, who I care about in a completely different way. This voice belonged to River.

"No" I think as I push myself to run faster, not caring that my eyes are wide and from how fast I'm running the wind flies into them making them tear up. "Move your ass River!" I scream in a hoarse voice, trying to make sure at least if I don't make it at least I buy River some time to run a good distance in front of the careers while their busy killing me. River looks scared but me screaming at him seems to make him snap out of it then turn tail and start running as fast as he can, in release a panted sigh of relief before I let lose a scream as a knife slices into my right ear as it flies by the side of my face and getting lodged into the tree in front of me. I'm momentarily startled that I accidently stop moving my lets which ends up with me tripping over my feet and slamming my head into ground which leaves my ears ringing loudly, my mouth gets a filled with some dirt and what tastes like blood. I stretch my jaw trying to somehow pop the ringing out of my head but with no avail. I spit a large glob of the dirt and blood out onto the ground before I scramble to my feet but before I even take one step I'm tackled to the ground by the closes career to me, which just so happens to be Marvel. We stare at each other for a second then he whispers almost inaudibly "knee me in the groin" I look at him confused before my brain comprehends what he said then almost instantly I raise my knee up into his groin, making him grunt out in pain then roll off me. I scramble back up to my feet wishing I could somehow have taken Marvel with me, "I guess not all careers are horrible" I think just as another knife whizzes past the left side of my head making my heart jump into my throat as a yelp releases from my lips. I try to rise the backpack up so its blocking my head as much as it can as well as trying to take in each step I take not wanting to fall again. I bound over a small stump and land in a small puddle making the water splash me and wet my pants to my calves. I can't see River at all in front of me but then just as I round a corner I bound into him, knocking both of us to the ground in a tangle of arms and legs. "River!" I screech untangling myself from him then harshly shoving him to his feet as I got to mine. I push him towards a small river which is thankfully small enough for me to wade against, silently thanking god that I wasn't drowning or getting stuck with the careers any time soon.

I thank god as River gets to grips that we're not out of the woods yet, no pun intended. Just as my feet touch hard land again I'm flung to the ground as a knife stabs into my shoulder making me scream out in pain, not caring who heard. The pain feels like fire and I want more than anything to crawl away from the pain even though I know I can't, begrudgingly I get to my feet and glare at River who is stopped a few feet in front of me looking scared yet concern for me that makes my heart feel a little light but not forget about where we're at. "Run now River and don't stop! Not for anything!" I grit out at him, not caring that I'm letting my pain target my anger towards the sweet boy from four. River looks scared at me then nods before hesitantly turning around and starts to run, quickly I start to run behind him.

Not too long after I start running I'm knocked to the ground by the boy from three who I struggle against trying to get the upper hand, well that is until he manages to slam my back into the ground which effectively makes me stiffen with pain as I let out a hoarse scream that has tears pricking my eyes, I lie still on the ground waiting for the pain to subside as three straddles my upper chest resting his knee against my shoulders not letting me move in the least, even if I wanted to. The first thing I register when my pain subsides is that three is looking through an assortment of knifes which has my heart pounding numbly with fear in my chest but then I think of River and how I screamed and now I'm scared of him coming back and getting the same fate that waits fro me so I manage to quickly scream "don't come back River!" before I'm punched in the side of the face by three, who I now know is just ass brutal as Clove herself. Well that and that him punching me leaves my vision plagued with black spots as the other side of my head slams into a rock. My head is swimming and I can't comprehend how to think or even observe as I unseeingly stare at three who moves his hand down to the hem of my shirt. I don't know how long I just lay on the ground underneath three but I do know is that the stomping of feet is getting louder and closer which has my heart sputtering in fear once again as I begin to thrash unsuccessfully underneath three who is starting to fondle my breast.

The boy from three laugh sinisterly as he pulls out a slender yet sharp knife which makes me immediately stop thrashing against him as he trails it against the side of my face then over my eyebrow before he starts dragging it down my cheek harder, managing to every so often to rip my skin apart in some places. And even though it hurts I grit my head and use the only thing I have in my ability to do. I inwardly want to cry and I have to silently pray that my father and Peeta aren't watching, a leisure smile spreads across my lips and this makes three pause and remove his knife from the corner of my mouth as he looks at me with confusion marring his face, I lick my lips then bat my eyelashes at him "you don't have to force me I'll cooperate if you just let me go afterwards" I say trying my hardest to make myself like an airhead, as if I thought he would actually let me go after I let him rap me and he must think this because he smiles snakelike dropping his knife to his side "alright" he says huskily as mirth danced in his practically black eyes, he moves his face down to mine and presses his lips to mine but doesn't close his eyes so immediately I swallow down my puke and close my eyes and kiss him as if I were kissing Rye and after a few seconds I pop my eyes open and take in closed eyes, silently reveling in this unseen victory. My right hand tangles in his hair as my other hand slides down to my side to grab three's discarded knife, which I quickly pick up then grip tightly at the handle, almost wanting to cry with relief knowing I won't get raped or killed. I slowly raise my hand until I have the knife positioned underneath three's neck, far enough away that he doesn't feel it. Staring at him as I numbly move my lips against his and I feel so mad and I don't know what makes me do it but it does. I bite down on three's bottom lip making sure to do some damage, he tries too jerk away from me as his wide anger filled eyes fined mine however just as he lurches toward me I press the knife up swiftly onto his throat, making damn sure I press it hard into his skin. And I know I'm doing my job right because I feel his blood seep out at me, splattering both my face ad blood as his now fear ridden eyes stare at me as he falls backwards off me, I lay still for a few seconds instantly feeling regret for killing three the way I've just done. I had gloated right in front of his dying eyes, my stomach feels sick and without my consent I roll over and puke.

As fast as I can I wipe my mouth with my sleeve not caring that it feels like I got it wetter than it already was which means its three's blood. I squeeze my eyes shut then shake my head before scrambling to my feet but before I start running I just stare down at the scared small boy from district three who must be about fifteen or sixteen. I want to puke thinking about what the president is making us all do when we enter these horrendous games. "I'm so sorry" I say then then next thing I know I choke on a sob as tears spill down m cheeks "I'm so sorry" I repeat as my trembling hands swiftly rise to my face to swat away my tears then I turn and take off running to a nearby tree since the careers are so close to me. My mind repeats the instructor at the climbing station told me to do, like to climb to the thinner branches up at the top because whoever is chasing you could be too heavy to get to you. I pant wildly as I force my battered body to climb as fast as I can up the tree until the branch I grab onto next snaps making me know this is my limit as well as makes me wobble slightly before flinging myself at the base of the tree before I slowly slide down until I'm sitting then ever so gently yet swiftly I reach back and yank the knife out of my back letting out a pained whimper that I somehow manage to swallow down. It's like all the pain in my body is amplified as I sit her aching as I watch with fear filled eyes as the careers come up to the tree I'm in. "Madge" Clove says in a sing song voice making a chill go down my spine, my eyes wonder form where Clove stands with her arms folded across her chest smirking over to Cato who is looking at me like he wants to murder me but I don't miss the look of want in his eyes and that alone makes me pray to god I fall from this tree and die swiftly instead of Cato getting ahold of me and raping then slowly killing me with some assistance from Clove.

"Your dead when I get you twelve" Cato growls out giving me a sinister sneer as he stabs his sword into the ground roughly "hey what did the earth ever do to you pal?" I call out making sure they hear my laughter that follows shortly after. Cato glares at me as Clove lets lose a screech then makes a move for the tree but Cato stops her, "I'm going to deal with her first then you can have her" Cato puts forth and I feel incredibly numb and sick at hearing his words. My body subconsciously starts to shake with fear as I watch Clove nod hesitantly before walking over to a nearby tree to lean up against, folding her arms over her chest once again then she gives me a smirk. 'Ha! After he rapes you, I'm going to fucking kill you!' she silently says and I feel like I'm going to double over and puke, my eyes watch as Cato walks over to the base of the tree then jump and grasp a branch before puling himself up onto the branch After he's up in the tree he starts moving pretty awkwardly but surprisingly fast until the next branch he grabs snaps underneath his grasp and he stumbles and falls out of the tree making a loud thud as he hits the hard earth below, I want to scream and cheer my small victory but I don't just silently watch and wait for what else they'll do.

The careers practically run over to Cato to see if he's okay, well all but Marvel who leisurely strides over to his allies as his eyes meet mine before quickly looking back to where he's walking. "You stupid lying, bitch!" Clove shouts storming over towards the tree before quickly taking out three knives and angrily throwing them at me. One gets embedded into the tree off to my left shoulder then another way off by a few dozen feet above my head but the third knife hits me in calf making me hold back a whimper before quickly letting out a loud over exaggerated scream wanting Clove and the rest of the careers think that she got me good. Clove smiles victories not caring as Marvel stomps angrily over to her "way to go idiot you used the rest of the fucking weapons. We only have Cato's sword" Marvel snaps giving Clove a stern glare before shaking his head acting as if he were disappointed in Clove's actions only for the waste of the weapons not because she's trying to kill another girl with said weapons. I want to scream a few choice curse words at him, thinking I had misjudged him but then I catch the worried glance he gives me before its hidden away behind a scowl. Clove rolls her eyes and smirks raising her shoulders "whatever Marv, I got the lying bitch didn't I" Clove states happily then she turns and practically skips back over to Cato.

Marvel looks at me then the sky before looking over to Cato as my bites down on his bottom lip then furrows his eyebrows then I see a flash of an idea flash across his face before he scores his features and take on a look of concern and jogs back over to Clove who is fussing over Cato and Glimmer who is staring blankly in to the distance as she sits on the ground as if she had retreated into her mind. I release a shaky breath then pull my leg up onto the branch with me as I examine the knife in my calf inside the sliced open fabric of my cargo pants, which are drenched with blood but I'm not one hundred percent certain if its my blood or not. I pull open the tear in my pants and let out a small whimper as I see that the knife is embedded into my leg deeply, I suck in a shaky breath before closing my eyes and tearing the knife free from my flesh before pocketing the knife. My calf burns with pain as my blood slowly seeps down my leg until it picks up a small pace. "Cato's head looks bad. I think he hit a rock or something on his way down" Marvel says as he seems to examine Cato's head as the career from district two looked ready to puke. "She's not going anywhere in that tree, so why don't we just take up camp tonight and wait her out. I know we're all tired … and anyway Cato should rest" Marvel puts forth, looking over to Clove who nods hastily only seeming to care about whatever is best for Cato. Marvel looks up to me as he walks over to Glimmer who has started to rock back and forth, "hey Glim why don't you help me get some wood to make a fire" Marvel says turning his attention back towards Glimmer who looks at him with annoyance like they were siblings, like the Mellark boys. My heart sinks thinking about my best friend and his brothers who tolerate me because of my friendship with their younger brother. "Don't call me that! You know I hate it" Glimmer mutter giving Marvel a glare but she does get up to her feet and walk a little ways off to start collecting some wood.

I settle more comfortably on my branch knowing I'm going to be here for a while and I need to stop the blood I'm losing. I begrudgingly take my coat off and tie it around my sliced open calf which is still leaking a good mount of blood, "that's going to stain" I can almost hear Gale say in my mind and before I can stop myself I venomously spit out "shut up!" before quickly swallowing down Gale's last name. "Wow, going crazy already, twelve?" Marvel chuckles from below as he walks over to where Glimmer is starting to pile together sticks where their fire will be, and even though Marvel laughs at me his mirth that seems to ooze off him doesn't reach his eyes and I can tell that he is actually worried about me which is strange. I mean its not as if I was his best friend and talked to him all the time when I was with the careers, we only talked a few times. I frown at him but he just chuckles some more and piles his woodpile from his arms into their fire pit.

I watch silently as Marvel, Clove, and Glimmer talk amongst themselves when all of a sudden I hear a beeping that seems to move slowly on my left before stopping and repeating in the same place, I frown staring into the darkness then hesitantly reaching out and feeling metal tap against my finger tips, "a sponsor parachute" I think happily practically squealing a as I pull the parachute towards myself. "Who in their right minds would sponsor her" Clove growls form below near the fire making me smile even wider, "thank you so much Haymitch" I whisper into the air as I pull the lid off the tin then open it and pull out a pristine white piece of paper that read

Stop being an airhead Pearl and get your head back into the game!

I let loose an airy laugh that reminds me sickly of my mother, I peer into the tin and pull out an apple and take a loud bite form it which makes Clove burst out laughing maliciously, "Ha! You got sent an apple. That's so pathetic" Clove laughs out, making me let loose another laugh but not at her words but because of the rather large looking container of healing cream which makes my stomach do a happy dance. I take another loud bite of the apple then smile widely as I thrust the apple out in front of me and towards Glimmer, Clove, and Marvel "want a bite Clove?" I ask in dreamy voice before I chuck it at her. The apple bounces a few times on the ground then comes to rest a foot or so away from Cloves boots, she rolls her eyes at me and laughs some more before kicking the apple into the fire then turning around and walking over the short way to Cato who she quickly lays down next to. Marvel looks as if he wants to laugh but he somehow manages to control his humor as Glimmer once again looks lost in her own world, I lick my lips then remove the canister from the tin and placing it on my lap then ever so slowly, to make sure I'm quiet I unscrew the lid which seems to take forever to come off. But when it does I swiftly toss it into the tin it came in then stick my hand into the smooth sticky paste that I quickly scoop some out and apply it to my mots crucial cuts, making sure I have enough on them so they will heal properly. When I'm done the canister is completely empty and I can't help but let lose a relief filled sigh as I feel the pain start to subside gradually. I accidentally let the container fall from my hands and watch it mutely as it falls to the ground with a dull thud. My eyes flies over to Marvel who is slowly walking over to where the container I dropped now lies. He looks up at me and give me a playful rise of his eyebrow before he crouches down and retrieves the container "you lucky I'm the one finding this" Marvel mumbles to himself before he glances back to his allies before throwing the container into a near by bush silently then he lets out a loud yawn and walks over towards the fire where he lays down, "you should try to get some sleep Glimmer" Marvel makes known nudging the tip of Glimmer's boots with his own boot, she looks up at him mutely then slowly slides off the log and curls up on the ground, her back to the fire.

"I need to get out of here" I think frantically as I startle awake by the loud anthem blares to life in the sky, I blink excessively holding my hands over my ears tightly not wanting to hear the music. My eyes looks everywhere but up, not wanting to have to see the boy from three's face or anyone else's face for that matter. As I look around I spot a nice size tracker jacker next in the tree next to mine, "maybe I can somehow throw the knife and hit it and make it fall" I think but immediately throw the idea out knowing it won't happen at all since the knife's not heavy enough to do that in the least. "Maybe you can fly like Rue" I think to myself as I remember watching Rue jump form tree branch to tree branch, like she was a small bird flying, hence her nickname. "I can at least try" I say to myself not caring if I sound crazy, "just need to wait until I'm sure everyone is sleeping" my subconscious adds on making me nod then settle back into my spot but I don't take my eyes off the tracker jacker nest.

Only when my eyes start to droop do I sit up and look, squinting my eyes at the careers taking in all there still bodies and hoping that their asleep. I slowly rise to my feet and wobble on my sleeping legs as I move to the closer branch getting ready to try and jump to the next tree. "Please don't let me die" I silently pray before releasing a shaky breath, then with one more glance at the careers I charge forward then close my eyes just as I jump and only open them when my stomach comes in contact with a branch making me lose my breath but that doesn't make m let go of my grip on the tree. With deft surprisingly steady hands I pull myself up onto the branch then wobble over to the base of the tree then proceed to climb up toe branches then over one where I quickly get to work on silently sawing at the branch that has the tracker jacker on it. I don't know how long I waste trying to saw at this tree with this small knife but my arm is killing me and I'm not getting anywhere, I blow out a whoosh of air making my bangs leave my sweat beaded forehead before they plaster to my sticky skin. "I need to e out further towards the next. The branch is smaller further out" I think rationally, "yeah its either that or dying by those savages" I mumble out humorlessly then hesitantly climbing out further onto the branch going slowly toward the next which thankfully is quiet. I can't hope that maybe I can cut the next lose before any tracker jacker's target me, but as I start silently hacking at the branch I hear a few buzzes then my hand is stung by an unseen force and it hurts real bad but instead of deterring my cutting I ignore the stinging pain in my right hand and start to cut faster.

I clench my jaw hacking away crazily at the branch trying to ignore the buzzing that is seeming to get louder until finally the nest is cut free but not before I'm stung twice more, once on my throat and another on my not uncut calf. I whimper as I move back towards the base of the tree waiting for the effect I know will come. And when it comes it worse than I originally thought it was going to be, instead of just a few scared screeches then quietness I hear loud screams form bellow and then they leave … well all but Glimmer, who I hear keep screaming loudly as she thrashes around on the ground in the faint morning light. My head feels airy and I know the effect of the tracker jacker venom is going to be taking toll on me so I need to get somewhere safe and quick. I stagger over to the base of the tree then begin hastily making my way down the tree and about halfway down the tree the branch below my feet snaps and I fall through he air and slam roughly into the hard ground making me lose my breath. I stumble to my feet only to trip over Glimmer's thrashing body, "I'm so sorry Glimmer" I slur out before I stumble to my feet again then begin running as fast as I can make my wobbly legs go. I run well for a while before I trip over a tree root then stumble and fall down a small hill. I stare in awe at the leafs hanging off the branches above me as they seem to shimmer then my eyes drop down and find a very familiar and scowling but shimmery Gale Hawthorne who glares at me "not even in the hunger games are you happy to see me" I blabber, my head lulling slightly on my shoulder then I hear a loud shout of something but its like I'm underwater so I can't make out what they're saying. I turn my head and see a shimmery looking figure run towards me before I'm dragged into unconsciousness.


	13. Chapter 13 Broken Memories

*Author note- Sorry for not posting this sooner my day was pretty busy and I forgot to post this today ... well I guess yesterday :( Just know that subconsciously I remembered not posting it because I woke up remembering it lol and decided to hurry and post this now and let you have I guess a small strangely I hope good surprise and yes I'll still be posting another chapter today since this one should have been posted hours ago, I apologize full heartedly and feel bad that I forgot. I hope you enjoy this chapter and I want to thank everyone for reading my little story, it means the world and beyond to me so thank you so much and I'm sorry I'm ranting lol I guess I'm slightly tired lol. Without further ado please enjoy, forgive any errors I might have missed, and you guys are the best! :) -077twihunger xoxo

**_Chapter Thirteen: Broken Memories._**

My eyes dart around myself, taking in the way the room seems to move as I do but only shimmer when I stand still. I flinch hearing the loud slamming of the back door as the wind howls, blowing hard making me frightened. I stumble over to the counter and lean on it for support as I wrack my brain for how many glasses of wine I've had been given by capital guests, which I'm obligated to drink out of respect for them. They would give me drinks while they chatted nonstop about some strange new fashion styles that are now in, I think one of them was something about animal looking implants that you can get but I'm not too sure. I physically shake my head trying to open my drooping eyes wider as I stumble over to the door frame only to stop when I see Mr. Touchy, aka Mr. Silver Lannister who I've met a few different times since I was nine but it seems more frequent now that I'm almost in my teens. His lavender hair is combed back to perfection and his blinding white smile makes my eyes want to close to have something mutter to look at I swallow then plaster on my winning fake smile, "can I help you with something Mr. Lannister?" I question trying my hardest to keep my speech clear and normal but I fail as my words start to slur at the end and the small smile of excitement that comes over his face makes me more scared than I've ever been in my whole life. I feel frozen, not able to move or do anything other than blink and swallow every once in a while, Mr. Lannister takes a step closer to me then raises his hand to my face, running his forefinger down the side of my cheek down to my jaw, then trailing up my bottom lip and heading dangerously close to my chest as he runs his finger down my throat. I recover from my momentary shocked fuzzy stupor. I step back while my hand slowly and shakily I might add slaps his hand away from my face looking at him with large disgusted filled eyes, "don't touch me sir" I say just an octave away from a sneer but since my speech is seeming to slur more than not it comes out airily like I'm about to pass out. Mr. Lannister rolls his eyes then grabs a hold of my right wrist and my left shoulder as he starts leading my un-cooperating body towards one of the downstairs bedrooms when Finnick Odair pops out of a doorframe, he looks shocked to see us but then he takes in Mr. Lannister and me and a charming smile spreads across his lips, "Madge Undersee, just the girl I was looking for. You promised to show me your room did you not?" Finnick flirts giving me a playful wink as he suavely takes my left hand from Mr. Lannister then leads me off with a wink to Mr. Lannister "excuse us Silver but I have to steal this little pearl away" Finnick laughs charmingly before he practically carries me up the stairs towards my room and away from Mr. Lannister's evil thoughts and touchy hands.

I feel so tired that I can't even take in the situation and tell if I should be worried about our latest victor since I hadn't known I should have feared anyone inside my own home. I can't seem to keep my eyes open so I begrudgingly let them slide close, the last things I register before I'm thrust into darkness is that I'm being laid down on a bed then my hair is being brushed away from my face and a few seconds later I feel a light slightly warm pressure on my forehead then I'm out like a light.

When I wake it's only because I'm incredibly hot, I try to wiggle out from underneath the blanket but don't make any dent in moving the strangely heavy cover. I instantly freeze and any though of going back to sleep leaves my mind as I feel an arm tighten around my waist as it pulls me close to the heat source and seems to make my heart practically stop with fear as I remember somewhat of what happened last night. Of how I got woozy then I was talking to a creepy looking Mr. Lannister and then everything just goes blank. "Oh god no." I think as tears prick my eyes and I feel that I am in fact not in the dress I was in last night but instead in something silky or I guess that could be my sheets, "Please tell me I didn't loose my virginity to some nasty old man" I think as I blink, letting my tears slide down my cheeks and before I can stop it a sob is choked in my throat and tears are now flowing openly down my cheeks, which seems to do the job of waking whoever is laying behind me. I hold my breath as I hold tight to the blankets over me then I dart off the bed and fall in a soft bundle on the ground and am looking up at a confused yet tired looking Finnick Odair, his green eyes still tinged with sleep as his shaggy blond hair lies messily in his eyes, he looks over the corner of the bed staring at me. My eyes go wide as I stare at the newest victor before I bolt to my feet then fly at him and start punching and slapping him "you're a sicko! You nasty pervert" I screech sending hit after hit to Finnick's bare chest until he effortlessly turns us over and pins me to the mattress underneath him with his much heavier body. Finnick's green eyes look more alive and awake than a few seconds ago, his nostrils flare as well as his chest heaves up and down, all the while he glares angrily at me. "I saved you last night and this is how you repay me, attacking me before I've even had a chance to wake up?" Finnick seethes pressing my body further into mine as his body sags tiredly then he rolls off me and sighs loudly then places his arms so they rest over his eyes, blocking them from view. I watch his body stiffen as the bed dips more as I slowly roll to face him more, finally realizing I'm in one of my nice knee length silk nightgowns instead of my large scratchy dark blue ballroom dress that I wore now, that I just so happen to see thrown haphazardly onto the floor of my room and I know its wrinkled and even though I will get a beating later today sometime because my things aren't treated like they should be even though I'll never wear the dress again, I don't really seem to care because Finnick's body is silently wracking and at first I have no idea why until I see something that looks a lot like a tear trickle down his face and disappears into his hairline. I lick my lips and wiggle a little closer to him then hesitantly rub my hand awkwardly on his arm before pulling one of his heavy arms up from his face then I awkwardly pull him into me for a hug, Finnick stiffens and seems to hold his breath as well but I ignore it and silently start humming mindlessly as my fingers comb through his hair and then I hear a muffled sob and Finnick is hugging me back but with much more strength, his fingers claw into my exposed back and even though it hurts a lot I bite my lip and let him have a moment of weakness since I know he most likely won't get another one since he'll be in the spot light a lot.

I continue to hug Finnick's much more long frame to my much smaller one wishing I could make him feel better but I can't think of anything else to say besides "well at least your not dead" I instantly regret my words right after they leave my lips but there's no way in hell for me to take my words back before he hears them, because he hears them and now is looking at me with so much anger then the next thing I know Finnick's a foot away from my face holding my chin tightly in between his thumb and pointer finger, "death would have been a better option if I had known what winning would bring…" Finnick's pained voice chokes out as he tries to control his obvious emotional rollercoaster he seems to be experiencing. I just stare dumbly at him not knowing what to say or do to make him stop glaring at me and treating me like I'm attacking him, Finnick looks at me then before I can even try to register what is happening Finnick has me pressed firmly into the mattress once again but this time his eyes are not sparked with anger but instead cloudy in thought as he seems to stare right through me, a hauntingly beautiful smile on his lips as his eyes brim with new unshed tears. "I'm going to have people paying for me … to … to do not nice things to me Madge" he practically breaths, his words almost falling on deaf ears. His hands moves to the edge of my nightgown and yet I'm too startled and scared to react or to even register what is happening to me.

Finnick lets out a psychotic sounding broken laugh before a sob is strangled in his throat, but he doesn't stop from pushing my nightgown up some then run the tips of his fingers over my inner thigh and finally I come alive smacking Finnick's face as hard as I can as I stare up at him with wide fear ridden eyes, he just stares at me then cocks his head to the side letting out a watery laugh looking me dead in the eyes. "They won't care if I don't want it. They won't care that I'm only fourteen … no. They helped me in the games. They helped me stay alive so why wouldn't I want to thank them for their efforts since without them I would surly be dead." He states then he smashes his lips against mine harshly makes me let out a scream but its muffled by his mouth then I'm clawing at his back trying to reach his hair to pull him off but he has already moved onto kissing my neck, which gives me a good reach to get to his hair so I grab it tightly in my hands and pull. He lets out a pained sinister laugh that is slightly almost fully a growl then he snatches my wrists away from his head and hold them above my head, and I can't help but not care that he see's me openly cry because I'm so scared. I'm trembling like a leaf and Finnick seems to look at me, but really actually look at me and take in what he's doing and he starts shaking as well as he lets out a hoarse sob then collapse on me, pulling me into his chest for a hug as he rolls us to we're on our sides and I'm not sure what to do since obviously he's already lost his mind.

As Finnick continues to bawl holding tightly I can't help but pity him instead feeling mad at him for weirdly doing whatever he was doing so I hesitantly hug him and tell him its okay which makes him cry harder and stutter out "I'm so sorry Madge. I'm just so fucked up right now." I don't reply but instead start humming once again as his head starts to drift dangerously lower and lower until he has the side of his face over my chest then presses his ear to it and for a minute I stiffen and stop humming but then he tightens his arms around my waist and lets out a low whimper which makes me instantly think of a small little child so immediately I start running my fingers through his hair and humming, ignoring his almost inaudible voice that keeps saying how sorry he is.

We stay like that for a while I let out a humorless laugh then mumble "that was my first kiss" I only mean for myself to hear my words but I know that Finnick hears me but that doesn't make me stop the tears that prick my eyes, then Finnick's bleary red rimmed green eyes are looking at me and I can see hints of gold swirled in his eyes. He shakes his head as if he was in pain, his eyebrows furrowed and his shoulders poised with stiffness, "I didn't mean to Madge … I wasn't thinking I swear. I would never do something like that… I would never Madge … I didn't mean to…" he gets out in one breath, his eyes looking back and forth between mine as pain and sadness fills his eyes. He shakes his head making his slightly shaggy swish around his eyes catching a glint in the light making it look even more sandy blond than it had when there was no light seeping into my room. "It's no big deal" I quickly blurt out a lie trying to make him feel better even though I know I should be mad, I just feel terrible sending that kind of feelings towards him when he is obviously going through something. "At least my first kiss was from the devilishly handsome Finnick Odair instead of whoever Snow will make me marry" I add on as an afterthought thinking it might raise Finnick's spirits even just a little but it works in the opposite way and the next thing I know I'm crying and so is Finnick but that doesn't stop him from moving up towards my face and pressing his lips against mine, both of our tear stained cheeks press together and we stare awkwardly at each other as we continue to cry. The kiss only lasts a minute or two at tops but its not special just two lost kids with their unmoving lips pressed to each other and its so unromantic and so heartbreaking that I can't help but let out a wet laugh that Finnick quickly returns then we're both laughing crazily and the air has seemed to thin into a pleasantly more appealing atmosphere.

"I really am sorry Madge I don't know what came over me. But that doesn't excuse what I was doing, I shouldn't have to think about whats right and wrong to do I'm just fucked up with whats going on and I'm so fucking scared yet I can't show it because I'm supposed to be this sexy charming none motional statue for these peoples to gawk at me but its happening and I need to figure out how to handle this in a heathier way then trying to get myself numb with you" Finnick sputters out awkwardly, running his fingers through his blind locks making his hair an unruly mess as an aggravated groan makes its way through his slightly parted lips. I know I have no reason to get mad at him because I don't even like him like that but him telling me he is just using me to help himself to get numb so he doesn't have to worry about figuring out how to get numb with his future clients. I glare at him then swiftly get to my feet before storming over to my bathroom to retrieve my robe which I quickly pull on then I storm back over to Finnick, pressing a lone finger into his chest as hard as I can not caring it probably hurts my finger more than it hurts his chest. "Fuck you! I know I might not be the prettiest girl or the most glamourous but I damn well know I'm at least somewhat a catch … in my own way. You should be happy that you could even force a kiss on me" I snap not letting my glare hinder in the least, but instead it grows more hard.

Finnick looks at me horrified, "no Madge thats not what I mean. Your beautiful and I would kiss you without even a thought if I thought it was okay to have a relationship and if I was stupid enough to put you in harms way … Madge its nothing to do with you and everything to do with Snow and myself. I can't even think about a girlfriend or even kissing when I need more than ever to start learning to play this new game I've been thrown into. You're a great girl and I would be beyond lucky to have you and I'm envious of whoever you end up with but I need to worry about keeping myself and my family safe." Finnick puts forth, his eyes pleading me to believe him, and I do and I'm mad that I do.

"I know, I don't even know why I got mad" I get out in a huff before I let out a humorless laugh shaking my head then flopping down on my bed then everything seems to change and the next thing I know my father is standing over me screaming things I can't understand since all I can hear is nothingness. His face is pale white but that doesn't stop him from yelling things at me that I know are about whatever I didn't do right, then I catch a glance of the right of the room and see President Snow's face on the monitor. He smiles like an evil snake waiting to strike and I instantly know what I'm in for, I turn towards my father as I feel my eyes wet "dad, please don't" I want to say but nothing comes out of my mouth. My lips move and yet all that meets my ears is nothingness then I see my father's hand moving slowly towards me yet its so fast but before my face is met with a the harsh smack I know my fathers hand with make to my face all too well but all that I'm met with what feels like some type of powder and them my wide blue eyes are staring into dark blue eyes of my best friend and he is smiling at me goofily as he tosses yet another handful of flour at me but just as I let myself fell at home my ears are met with a loud piercing scream then instantly I'm on my podium and the countdown is staring and the games haven't started yet. I search around and take in Gale who is standing next to Cato and Marvel while the boy from three stands ungodly close to River and Rue is stuck in between Clove and Glimmer and I feel like I'm going to throw up as my whole body seems to fill with dread and an ungodly cold chill that seems to take over my body.

I glance around trying to figure out a way to get us all out of here when that gong goes but then I noticed that my cylinder never went back in and I'm stuck here. Just then the gong sounds and there is so much blood. Its like everybody is a mouth and the cornucopia is a flame, they all rush over to it and with that a large spill of blood begins. My eyes rank franticly over the crowd of fighting youths until I find the familiar face of my small bird like ally get shoved viciously to the ground by an even eviler looking Clove who looks even taller than I remember her begin. Glimmer scrambles to the ground and holds little Rue down as Clover pulls out a small jagged looking knife that she holds tightly in her hand, she glances up at me and gives me a taunting smile before she turns her knife and attention to my little bird and I start screaming loudly as my hands pound against the cylinder I'm stuck in wanting more than anything to be let free so I can save my ally.

My hands hurt so I decide to close my hands into fists then start slamming them at the glass in front of me as I watch Clove look back over at me before she swiftly stabs her knife into Rue making her scream, her scream goes to my very soul and I start loosing it screaming at the top of my lungs as tears stream down my faced then I see a flash of something on the ground that immediately grabs my attention and a sob cuts off my screams as I watch horrifyingly transfixed as the boy from three easily chases down River then swiftly pick him up and snap his neck. I drop to my knees as my body begins to shake but I'm not sure if its from my crying or from being paralyzed with fear. My heart feels numb as my unseeing eyes take in all the blood and gore until I spot a very familiar head of shaggy brown hair then almost instantly my eyes find the all to familiar deep grey eyes of Gale Hawthorne and instantly I'm back on my feet screaming hysterically at the top of my lungs not caring that my throat burns form my screams and instead to continue doing it as well as starting to take turns from kicking and punching the glass cylinder that encases me and keeps me from helping Gale who is struggling against keeping Cato at bay as Cato's pack watches the two with mirth filled eyes, leisurely leaning up against the cornucopia off to the right of us.

I feel like I'm going to die as I watch Gale lose his footing then falls to the ground and Cato takes that opportunity to dive on top of Gale and swiftly stabbing his large sword into Gale's chest making a gasp of shocked pain leaves Gale's parted lip making my heart shatter then die as my body falls slack in the cylinder as my body shakes uncontrollably as my body wracks with deep gut-wrenching, heart shattering sobs as I see blood seep out of Gale hastily, soaking into the grass and girt below him. I can't believe what I'm seeing. In no universe am I suppose to see the boy … or rather man I love die in front of me. I had this whole thing planned, I was going to try and take as many people as I can down and somehow die on the way towards the end and Gale would win and go home and have his happy ever after with Katniss. He isn't allowed to get hurt and he most definitely isn't allowed to die, especially not in front of me. "He … He isn't … wasn't supposed to die at all." I think as my eyes seem to surprisingly spill even more tears out as I watch Gale's unmoving body with my unseeing eyes, that can only picture Gale dying over and over again and then the next thing I know I bolt up right and I'm panting heavily as my wide eyes search my dark surroundings but not being able to see anything in the least.

I sit stiff, not moving a muscle as I impatiently wait for my breathing under control until I can actually hear my surroundings since I can't even see. As soon as my heart stops pounding in my ears I remember Gale dying and then once again my heart is pounding frantically and causes me to subconsciously say "Gale!" which comes out as a more choked sob than anything, then almost undetected from my choked sobs which start to wrack my body I hear a crunch of leaves which is followed by someone walking closer to me and the closer they come the more I can see them in the moonlight, I stare wide eyes at the man standing in front of me, his face void of any pain and his chest not showing any signs of a sword ever being stabbed in it. In front of me stands the one and only Gale Hawthorne and he looks just as rough as I feel but somehow not, he looks better … in his element even. "I'm here Madge" Gale's gruff calmingly familiar voice calls across the large space between us and for reasons unknown to me I get to my feet then turn around and take off running as fast as I can.


	14. Chapter 14 Bitter Ends

*Author note- Sorry for the late post but the power went out yesterday so I couldn't really post this lol but hey its here now :) So I hope you guys enjoy it. As always please review, in hope you guys enjoy the read, and please forgive me for the errors I might have missed. -007twihunger

**_Chapter Fourteen: Bitter Ends._**

For a while I don't hear anything but then I hear hard stomping behind me followed by Gale's voice "Madge! Madge would you just fucking stop already!" he shouts behind me and it sounds so much like he wants me to stay with him that my feet stop on there own and before I can decide if I should keep moving or stay here I'm bulldozed to the ground by Gale Hawthorne himself. We stare at each other and before I can get to my feet again to flee, Gale wraps his arms around my arm pulling me back towards him and as I am pulled closer to him he manages to get his arms wrapped around my waist pulling me closer to his body so I can't move, and I know who he is and that he'd never do anything to me like that but with that tracker jacker venom fucking with my head, making me remember somethings I'd have tried long and hard to forget about not to mention that Cato's looking to rape me I start to scream and wiggle until I manage to hit Gale in his jaw with my elbow making him instantly release his hold on me as we all growling "god damn it Undersee. What the fucks wrong with you?" I stare at Gale as I get to my feet, I rub the back of my neck before my fingers rub against something that I quickly pull off and see what looks like some chewed up leaves. I look at Gale with questioning eyes until I decide to give the leaves another look over since I did pretty well on that station when we were learning to survive in these games. The leaves have strange webby creases under each point and this alone tell me that there the precise leaf that can help suck out the tracker jacker poison. I want to scream and cry and be happy but be mad, why would Gale help me? He hates me. He wouldn't do this back home so why now?

I can't help myself before I blurt out similar questions that are almost identical like the ones swirling around in my head. "What the fuck are you doing trying to help me Hawthorne? How are we at all friends? Why are you doing this to me?" I try to sneer but my heart contorts with pain at him throwing my last name at me and though it isn't surprising it still stings like hell and makes me remember who I will always be to him, the girl with everything who he can throw his anger at so of course I have to throw his own name back at him. Gale looks taken back by my words as he rubs his jaw glaring at me, "Why the fuck can't you townies be grateful!" Gale sneers back making me flinch and for him to take a step towards me and out of reflex I smack him making him glare even harder but so do I. Even though my body slightly trembles with rage as I myself take a step towards Gale before I stop, realizing how I somehow stupidly let myself tell him how I actually feel even somewhat about him. But he doesn't seem to hear that at all, only choosing to hear the mean part of my words and this angers me "why am I always nothing to you?" I wonder a loud looking at him with what I know must be an ocean of sadness filled to the brim in my eyes, he looks at me with confusion until he opens his mouth but before he can utter anything I just shake my head "leave me alone Gale. It shouldn't be hard for you since you hate me so much" I snap then I quickly take off at a fast run not caring that my side and lungs burn slightly form going from zero to one hundred in an instant because the physical pain hurts less than the heart wrenching pain I feel over Gale Hawthorne.

I run for a while before I'm absolutely sure Gale isn't following me anymore then I start heading back to where I know where my allies had stay the night before or however long ago I was out, I know I told them to leave and not stay in the same place but there's a small part of my who silently wishes they sated for me so we could be together again and as I think about that I instantly start feeling stupid and horrible about leaving Gale. "It would have been a million times better trying to protect him if we were together idiot!" my subconscious barks making me feel even worse, "god I'm so stupid" I breath scrubbing my hands over my face letting out an irritated type of growl before subconsciously I breath out "I'm so sorry Gale" knowing no one but me and the cameras will here … well that and all the people watching the games. Because I'm so distracted with my thoughts until I come upon the very bloody patch of earth I know all too well is where Avery took her last breath and this alone is able to take my mind away from Gale.

The leaves crunch underneath my feet as I walk very slowly and very numb I might add, over to the cave tree we had found. My throat is thick with emotion and I find myself having to swallow down some saliva every ten seconds. I stand still for a little bit just looking at the tree cave before I let out a whoosh of air. My feet seem to carry on their own, leading me over to the tree cave and without a though about anything other than finding my allies I look inside the tree but find nothing and no one. I frown, my eyebrows furrowing then I blurt out "River Rue!" loudly not caring who will hear, I just know I need to find my allies. I spin around in a circle looking with wide eyes all around me as if maybe I had miss them standing somewhere off to the side but I know all too well that their not here, however it doesn't take away the fact that I still feel panicked that I'm not sure if my allies are okay as well as I wish I could find them so I can take care of them, "maybe its better this way, end my alliance with them before I care too much for them plus I don't want to see them get hurt" I think as I bite the inside of my cheek, my eyes trying to somehow find them out of thin air "you already care for them too much" my subconscious adds on making me want to feel sick knowing that's true and that I will eventually have to experience their deaths for Gale to win, however I'm not too sure if I'm going to be able to handle it when it is happening.

Aimlessly I start walking with my knife in my hand as I bite at my bottom lip not caring that I accidently bite too hard and draw blood instead I try to think of what to do know that I'm all alone again, my mind only coming up with nothingness as I let my feet do my thinking. It is still pretty early so not much light is up, but its enough for me to see my surroundings, wet blades of grass stick to my boots as I walk. The cold morning air is slightly hard to breath through since it hurts my throat. I can hear some mockingjays off in the distance and their singing is so beautiful I let myself get enraptured by it and because of this I don't pay any attention to my surroundings and the next thing I know I'm being pulled by the front of my jacket roughly towards a hard chest which makes me gasp in fear. My wide eyes look up and take in the very familiar face of Marvel who is glaring at me, "why the hell would you fucking come back here, do you want to die?" Marvel grits out as he lets go of my jacket but before I can be happy about it he grasps my shoulders tightly in his hands making my stomach turn not knowing whats to do since I'm not too sure about Marvel. His face has a few tracker jacker stings and I feel terrible and instantly I blurt out "look for a leaf with a strange webby creases under each point then you chew them up and place them over the sting and it will take out both the venom and make the swelling go down," Marvel lets out a irritated sigh before he drops his hands from my shoulders and steps back from me, scrubbing at his face with his hands then he's once again looking at me "why would you come back here Madge? You know Cato and the rest could have came back here and they could be the ones here instead of me" he starts "but you're here" I cut in making Marvel look away from me, he kicks at the ground sending some small rocks and nuts into the air and into a nearby bush.

He mutters something lowly to himself that I can't hear as he starts to pace then he turns around and stomps over to me "will you kill me if you had the chance?" Marvel demands, his eyes piercing into mine making me think he can see into my soul. I stare at him and I must take to long because Marvel glares at me then reach forward and gives me a little shake "Madge! Would you try to kill me if you had the chance?" Marvel repeats not looking away from my eyes as he does. I blink a few times then shake my head "I would never kill you … you helped me while I was with the careers" I mumble out unsurely, our eyes not leave each others. Then Marvel does something I don't expect he pulls me into his chest and hugs me, "I won't kill you if I see you … but if it comes down to the two of us then … then I'm going to kill you. I have to go home if I can Madge, my girlfriend Diamond is pregnant and I need to come back for them" I stare at Marvel and I feel sick because I don't want him to die, hell I don't want anyone to die but I know they all have to for Gale to win. River and Rue will have to die and so will Marvel, Clove, and Cato not to mention me, we'll all die while he gets to have a brighter future with his family and maybe he'll get with Katniss and he won't get sold at all "Like that will happen" I think and immediately I'm physically flinching making Marvel look at me strangely. I force a smile at Marvel, however I know without a doubt that it comes out as anything but that. "Your girlfriends really lucky to have such a nice guy like you" I say trying to turn any conversation away from me from my momentarily lapse of crazy. Marvel smiles at me then glances up at the sky as a fond smile takes over his face as he no doubt thought about his girlfriend. "Yeah, Diamond is a magnificent girl and I love her" I smile genuinely at Marvel then nod "I'm really glad I go to meet you Madge, your not at all like I would have thought you would be and I know if we met outside of here we could possibly be friends so I say this with all the affections I can but I hope one of us is dead before we meet again" Marvel adds on giving me a small smile then knocking his shoulder with mine as I smile goofily up at him "so do I Marvel" I reply taking a step back from him then turn and start to run away from him hoping I don't have to see Marvel again since it feels daunting, like something terrible and it could only be my most certain death.

I weave around trees and bushes as I keep up a decent jog, my hand grasped tightly around the handle of my knife as my eyes dart every which way trying to make sure no one sees me as well as trying to make sure I don't slip or trip over anything. When I decide to try and wade through the small river which is now somehow doubled I hear and almost uninteresting thing to catch your attention while your in here but it is to me since I know that tune that the mockingjays are playing back to someone and I know it has to be Rue, it has to be my little bird. Without a thought in the world I stoop then turn quickly on my heels and start running full speed towards where the tune is coming from. I can't help but smile as I run, my face getting scraped and smacked by low hanging branches as I make my own path towards the tune noticing its getting louder then I hear a sharp snap of "be quiet" from River's voice over on my left and because I don't want to scare them I stop running and pant happily, having an almost euphoric about getting reunited with my two allies who have very quickly became family to me. "Little bird … Mermaid man" I say loudly in a sing song voice knowing they'll hear me and I know I'm right when I hear the fast approach steps of my allies.

My little birds the first to get to me. She practically knocks me to the ground as she jumps on me squeezing me tightly in a small bear hug which makes me beam hugging her back then my eyes meet River's and he looks hesitant and I know he must feel guilty about leaving me for what he thought, probably death. I smile warmly at him and he looks shocked that I'm being nice to him and it breaks my heart so I quickly ask "what you've already decided you don't like me anymore?" he cokes out a laugh, his eyes twinkle with happiness then he rushes forward and hugs both little bird and me. We stay hugging each other for a bit until I hear River mumble "I'm sorry I wasn't brave enough to go back and look for you sooner" I stiffen then pull back from him and set Rue back on the ground. "Stop being dumb River you were so brave. It takes real courage to come looking for me and you did as soon as you could, huh?" I say crossing my arms over my chest narrowing my eyes at River who looks down at his slightly dirty boots as if they were the most amazing thing he's ever seen in his whole life and I know that isn't possible. I clear my throat trying to get his attention but still he doesn't look up so I roll my eyes and sigh loudly, "stop being so hard on yourself River. You made us go out looking for Madge right when you got back … not that I would have said no. I would have went looking for you goldilocks" Rue puts forth looking at River with big brown eyes, River peeks up and gives Rue a small smile not wanting to be the reason poor Rue gets upset because he got upset, "see I knew you did River. You'd always go back for someone you care about and I feel so honored that you care about me" River's cheeks tinge pink and I hear a weak "thanks Madge" and its so cute how he's embarrassed that I'm praising him.

I walk over to River and give him a kiss on the cheek and a big hug which he returns without a thought. I smile at him then motion for them to follow me back where I came form and they follow obediently, "I found Gale earlier … but … I have seemed to have misplaced him but we're going to look for him and then we can figure out where to go from there" I say trying to keep my voice down but to sound chipper because who knows maybe we can just make it to the end without any other tributes just Gale, River, Rue, and me and maybe even Thresh if he's as nice as his district partner. If we can all last that long then maybe we could just have a sit in or something "yeah and then they'd send in the mutts" my subconscious snaps making me frown because I know its true, no matter what I want or what anyone else here want only one person gets to get out of here alive and I'm just hoping since Gale has two people well really three counting Haymitch, who are all working to get him out alive.

I'm snapped out of my own head as River walks in front of me and stops "did you hear me Madge?" river demands, his voice laced with anger and hurt and I know it has to be about Gale no doubt. I release a loud whoosh of air then raise an eyebrow at him which makes him furrow his eyebrows in anger "so you don't even care to ask us if we want to team up with that jackass, just because you love him Madge? That so one sided. What about what Rue or I want, huh? What about that? All you ever talk about is that stupid guy who doesn't give a shit about you and still you're here pining over him like some stupid school girl when you know as well as us that he'd kill you if he had the chance!" River snaps loudly at me making me flinch and I didn't think someone I cared about could hurt me like that, I mean sure my fathers beaten me so hard that he broke my rib and on another occasion he broke my tailbone but that I expect because he has to do if to keep me safe even with how terrible that sounds its true. If father refused to punish me for not portraying my rightful image then I would get taken to the capital to be taught that lesson there and that would no doubt be way worse, so I honestly don't mind taking a beating or two. But my sweet charming River just threw things I already know into my face and it hurts so bad having my thoughts voiced, especially by someone other than me. I stare at River and don't notice I'm crying until I feel my tear trickle down my throat then absorb into the collar of my shirt. "If that's how you feel then you two don't have to come with me at all. I love you two I really do but your right I care about Gale I guess a little bit more and I can't not help him if I can River, its just not in me to deny Gale anything like that. He deserves to see Rory, Vick, and sweet little Posy to grow up. He deserves to marry…"I spit out then trail off not even being able to say Katniss's name I close my eyes and more tears rush down my cheeks, "Madge" River starts but I stop him "no" I snap opening my eyes to look at him, I didn't shout at him at all just said it but he looks at me like I screamed it at the top of my lungs at him.

I shake my head then glance at the sky letting out a watery chuckle as I see the beautiful sky that would give the impression of a lovely day but I know otherwise. "You don't think I know how much Gale hates me? I can't stop thinking about it River. How pathetic am I, the poor rich mayors daughter who has no friends and who loves the very boy who screams at her in an almost daily basis. My heart breaks every time I remember that I'm not good enough for him and no amount of me sitting around crying and praying will change that, because it won't and I know that. But that doesn't stop me from loving him and wanting to make sure I can protect him as much as I can while I'm alive in here. Maybe it would be a good idea if we decided to split up now … it would save the heart ach" my words although true it doesn't necessarily take the sting away any less. River looks at me with large green eyes as I hear small Rue start to choke on her sobs, "I don't want to leave you guys as much as you don't want to leave me but I don't want to watch you die also, and if I had to pick seeing you happy and dead as my last memory of you two then I want it to be of you tow happy" I state trying to blink away my tears as Rue cries harder and then very slowly River starts to tear up as well, "I didn't mean what I said I was just upset over Gale, its just you like him so much and I'm jealous of him Madge and its crazy that you love him so much and he's too blind to see what a catch you are. Please don't make us break up … at least not yet. Not because of some stupid fight we had … families always fight but then everything is alright afterwards so we have to be alright because you guys are my family in here. Don't make us go Madge" River sputters out looking at me as tears start to glide down his slightly dirty cheeks, leaving clean trails in there wake.

I'm quiet for a little bit just trying to stop crying then finally when my tears subside I nod licking my lips, "okay we ca stay together until the final five but then after that we have to go on our ways without any fuss okay" I say and River and Rue nod practically shouting out their agreements then we're all laughing stupidly, trying to dry our faces of any tears or the stains they left on our dirty faces. As we start off walking again I hold both Rive and Rue's hands and I silently soak up my small slice of normal bliss even if its just as small as being happy I have two people I care about to be with a little while longer while I'm in here, until I die.

It doesn't take us too much longer to be back on our way towards the river to cross back over it, to put even more distance between the careers and us. Once we reach the river we all stop and stare at it in amazement, not because it looks cool or that we're excited to cross it once again. No, we stare at it in amazement because the river has now grown in size and no doubt in the depth. "Well this shouldn't take too long ass long as we make sure to swim at an angle to we'll end up on the other band a small ways down" River puts forth as he takes his backpack off making sure its all secure then he puts it back on his back and turns his attention to Rue's backpack doing the same thing, "I can't swim River" Rue's little voice makes known as her wide scared eyes stare at the dangerous looking river in front of us. I swallow then clear my throat, looking over my shoulder at River who has moved on to check my backpack as well. "I can't swim either" I tell him, he looks at me then over at little bird, he looks lost in thought for a minute but that doesn't last for two long when we hear a loud explosion and it hits too close to home on when I was getting attacked with the fire the Gamemakers sent after me. I take an absentminded step towards the water, tugging little bird along with me by her hand as River stands in front of us blocking us as if he could take down anything heading our way even though we know he most likely can't since everyone left is way bigger and stronger than the three of us, unless its one of the girls that are left well apart from Clove as well as one of the mutts the Gamemakers could send our way.

A fire ball shoots from the tree behind us making us shriek and move closer into the water, getting our shoes and pants soaked. I grab a hold of River by his shirt and push him in front of me, "you take Rue across then we'll workout how I can make it over to you guys if swimming with me is too much … maybe I can find a few trees to climb through and somehow across this river" I put forth, River looks scared but he nods acting as if he isn't. "Come on little bird" River says holding his hand out towards Rue who looks close to tears, "your right behind us right Madge?" Rue questions, turning her big brown eyes towards me and all I can do is smile and nod even though I'm not sure, I just want them to not worry about something that could happen to any of us as we try to cross this river. Rue nods, tears brimming her eyes then rushes forward hugging me as if she might not see me again and who am I to say she's wrong. I hug Rue to me tightly then let her go and crouch down so I'm at her eye level "everything's going to be okay. We just need to stay calm and work on being as safe as we can" he nods at my words and out of the corner of my eye I see River do the same. I smile at her and place a kiss to her forehead then I flinch pulling away from her as another fire ball flies by us and practically splinters a small tree near us making Rue scream and fall almost but thankfully River catches her, "River go now" I demand turning to look at a large wall of fire moving closer to us and its almost comical because I know this might be the way I die. It makes me sick thinking about what the Gamemakers are doing, I want to laugh, the girl on fire who, was on fire in every sense of the word and its scares the hell out of me.

River looks at me worriedly then helps Rue back on to the bank we're standing on before he strides over to me then before I can react he grabs behind my head and pulls my face towards his until my lips touch his and it takes me by surprise so I just stand there letting River place a swift chaste kiss to my lips before he moves away form me some, his cheeks tinted almost completely red. I had to do that at least once … Sorry Madge. Come on Rue" River mutters embarrassedly rubbing the back of his neck and I can't help but laugh making both Rue and River smile even though we all know this is not the time or place to be laughing. "I'll be right back I promise" River makes known looking into my eyes deeply making him seem older than fourteen. I nod then motion for them to hurry as I glance behind me taking in the thick wall of fire that seems to be getting closer and closer. Both River and Rue take off their backpacks to make their trip through the water easily and I can't help but watch them as my breath catches in my throat, my eyes wide with fear that something will happen to them but when they make it across and I see a shivering Rue getting helped to the other side of the bank I can't help but fell relieved but that soon evaporates as a fire ball slams into my hip making me fly forward into the water making me make a large splash from my body and thankfully I'm close enough to the bank that I'm not swiftly taken out with the current.

I sputter and couch making my way back up onto the bank I fell from and I take in the two worried faces of my allies who are now looking at me with fright filled eyes and all I can think to do is lie to them "its fine. I just tripped" I shout the lie towards them which they grasp onto like it because they know I've never lied to them and this alone makes me feel guilty about even lying, but I already know they'd be panicked even further if they knew that the Gamemakers were solely going after me and it scares me because I must have done something huge for them to being going out of their way to try and kill me. I swallow then pick up one of the backpacks and toss it over at River and Rue and it lands near them that River easily yanks it free from the water then I toss the other two backpacks, one at a time and just as I toss the last one I feel an ungodly amount of heat on my back which makes me turn to look at it and almost immediately I feel sick seeing how close the wall of fire is to me and as I look back over at River and Rue I can tell their scared as well.

The fire crackles and some flames pop out at me causing me to move more into the water so it reaches my knees. My body trembles as I look at the dark looking water of the river, "just try to do your best and swim out some so we can try to meat further out" River calls to me and I nod mutely, hoping more than anything that I won't die. I take in a shaky breath before I dive forward and am instantly underwater where I start flailing my body trying to get to the surface and when I do I gasp for air and am met with a mouth full of water that leaves me couching and before I can actually pull in any air something latches onto my left leg and yanks me down into the water making me scream which is cut off by the water that forces its way into my mouth and throat. I try to keep my mouth closed as I try shaking my leg to free whatever has caught onto it until I realize that whatever has my leg feels all too hand like and I'm proven right as I see a large slimy looking black hand of some mutt that has my leg in its grasp, then it begins pulling me further down. Not knowing what else to do I reach down and start trying to hit as well as kick what has me and I do it a couple time before my left wrist is bite and an intense fiery pain flows through my whole arm then seem to quickly work its way up to my shoulder then filling out through my chest and then before I know it everything hurts and because I can't help it my mouth pops open on its own and I let loose a muffled scream then everything seems to be getting darker as my body starts to go slack. Just as I let my eyes close my arm is yanked up and to my surprise I go with it. I slowly rise up in the water until I'm once again above the water and though all I want to do is take in some air, my heavy chest doesn't allow me to.

Its like flashes everything happens first its all black then the next moment I see the sky before my eyes are met with more darkness. My eyes met green this time, probably from the trees and once again all I see is darkness before meeting the frighten face of my allies then everything goes dark once more. When my eyes open next, my head is lull dot the side and I see a very pale and bloody looking River who is laying on the bank next to me, looking as if he's trying harder than he should have to breath. His eyes arm brimmed with tears that flow openly down his face and then I see the deep cuts on his chest and I can't come to grips with what I'm seeing but before I can even try everything thing goes dark and the last thing I think of is that I hope Rue and River will be okay now that I'm gone.


	15. Chapter 15 Departed Friend

*Author note- Hey guys sorry for being MIA I just couldn't think properly about how to write let alone string together words :( but thankfully I'm back and writing for you all again :) I wanted to say how much it means that you all keep coming back and reading my little fanfiction, it's beyond crazy to know people actually like my writing so thank you guys to the moon and back, you guys rock! I hope you guy enjoy this chapter, please review, and please forgive any errors I've missed :) -007twihunger xoxo

**_Chapter Fifteen: Departed Friend._**

The first thing I register is that my chest and head hurt, "but shouldn't I already be dead by now?" I think as a groan leaves my chapped parted lips and I force my eyes open to see what I can see around me and immediately I wish I hadn't because lying in front of me is a very pale and lifeless River. His chest looks terrible with the five long and deep slices into his chest from the collarbone to his stomach. His blood looks to have turned a nasty black color as if it were ink or something. His once bright green eyes are a dull lifeless green, as his unseeing eyes stare at me. I don't know what to do so I just stay still and stare at my once ally as I lay a few feet away from him on the cold wet ground but then I hear a whimper which is followed closely by muffled gut wrenching sobs that I'm absolutely certain aren't coming from me since I'm to shocked to process anything but who could it be? Then almost immediately Rue's little face pops into my head and I'm hastily flinging myself up into a sitting positron before I stumble to my feet, ignoring the fiery pain I still feel throughout my body. My head feels hazy and lightheaded for getting up to fast but I don't care since I need to comfort my little bird.

My eyes fly all around my surroundings but I can't find her and this has my heart plummeting in my chest as I start to worry about her until I remember who she is then without a thought my head snaps over to a nearby tree where I see a curled up Rue crying into her knees, her small body wracking with sobs. "Little bird why don't you come down here" I get out in a hoarse voice that sounds nothing like me as well as ignite the irritated scratchy burn my throat has from being so damn dry. Rue's head snaps up at my words and she looks at me with wide teary eyes before she hastily gets out of the tree then charges at me and plowing into me as we hold each other tightly.

We stay like that for a while, me holding Rue tightly in my arms as she sobs uncontrollably into my shirt, effectively soaking it. When Rue's sobs turn into soft sniffles only then does she move back from my grasp so she's looking at me, "I thought you were both dead" she puts forth a strangled sob muffled in her throat as she closes her eyes and presses her lips together tightly making them slightly white from the pressure. She shakes her head as if that could remove her dreary thoughts, her curls shaking out around her small shoulders and face before he takes in a shaky breath then looks up at me once again "what all happened little bird?" I ask gently knowing it will be heard for her to say but I know I need to hear it as well. Rue looks down quickly then I see her start to turn her head to look over at River but I catch her chin stopping her, "that will only make it worse" I put forth trying to keep my own voice form cracking. Rue nods mutely then looks back up at me, her eyes shiny with new tears that haven't fell yet. "River was swimming out to you and because of that he didn't see that you came up then immediately went back down. I was scared, I dint; know what to think or what was going on so I just stood near the water waiting for you two to resurface but … but you never did. It seemed like forever you guys where down their and then out of nowhere River and you popped up and River was swimming over with you … I was so happy … I thought … I though I was going to lose you guys…" Rue starts then trails off as she tries to calm herself down from the tears threatening to take her over, I grab her hand and give it an reassuring squeeze but I don't drop it.

It take a few minutes before Rue is able to look back up at me, however when she does she almost immediately starts talking once again, "it seemed like it was harder for him to swim with you and I thought that was because your bigger than me and you were obviously unconscious … but … but when he got onto the bank with you I saw that his shirt was tore open and he was bleeding this strange black stuff. He … he was really shaky and really pale. He started to try to do CPR but all that would happen is water would come out of you mouth and you'd stay really still, not even your chest was moving Madge. Then River fell over and started to scream and cry as his body twitched then he just stopped moving Madge … We got sent a sponsor gift and it said to use it on you and if there was any left to use it on River so I did but you both stayed so still. Madge … you were so cold and pale that I thought that you'd died too but only one cannon went off. I wasn't sure if it was for both of you so I just climbed up in that tree waiting and praying you'd both wake up but that didn't happened" Rue gets out before she's once again overcame with sobs and on instinct I pull her into my chest as my own tears started to make there way down my cheeks, my eyes finally looking over at my first ally then the next thing I know my legs give out from underneath me and I fall to the ground taking Rue with me as my body start wracking with heart wrenching sobs at the loss of my ally … of my friend … of not being able to tell River how much he meant to me and now he's gone and I'll never be able to.

Even though I knew that all three of us would die it doesn't do anything to take away the pain I feel in my chest which seems to dominate anything else I'm feeling. I can't get myself to care that our sobs are way too loud and surly someone will hear it and I don't care the there's a rock underneath my right knee which has easily tore through the fabric of my pants and has pierced my skin, I can't help but feel that the more physical pain I feel it might take away the pain I feel in my chest or maybe even dwindle it some but it doesn't. This pain I feel in my chest, the gust wrenching heart tearing pain I feel in my chest demands to be felt even thought I'm not strong enough to deal with it.

When I've run out of tears my body continues to tremble and all I can do is mumble out a weak "you did a good job Rue. River would have been so proud of the way you took care of things when you needed to … There was absolutely nothing you could have done that would have saved him … the cuts were too deep and I think they had some type of poison in them" while on the inside my mind is only replay one thing "you killed him!" Its strange how numb I feel and yet still the crippling pain is on repeat in my heart, every once in a while making me physically wince from the pain. I look over to Rue and offer her a weak smile since I can't stand seeing her upset and she offers up a watery smile in return before once again we're in silence but instead of like last time we aren't crying but instead staring mutely at our fallen ally.

After a little while longer I untangle myself from Rue then stagger weakly to my feet, my legs feeling as if they were made out of Jell-O. My feet take me over to River's body where I quickly fall to my knees gaining something sharp to stab into my right knee and this time I can actually feel it and it takes some of the pain away if only for a few seconds before its back and blearing full forced at me to feel it. My hand shakily reaches out and I gently brush his hair away from his forehead as more tears prick my eyes but I don't let them leak out, his skin is so cold to my touch and causes me to shiver subconsciously but I don't deter running my fingers through River's hair, "I'm so sorry River, I'm so sorry. How was I supposed to know you would go and do a stupid thing like try and save me … you should have just left me, I would have understood why you did it. You know when you asked me if you stood a chance if you were my age and lived in twelve?" I say, I know I must sound crazy talking to a dead boy but he was much more than that to me and he still is. I lick my lips and offer him a watery smile as I gently close his eyelids for him, "you would have definitely stood a chance" I choke out as tears spring out of my eyes and down my cheeks, however I can't find it in me to care or even to try and wipe them away in stead I lurch forward and hug River's body to mine and my tears blind make it almost impossible to see and even that doesn't stop me.

I clutch River to me and lowly choke out "I'm so sorry. It was all my fault," on repeat not even being able to stop myself if I wanted to. Not too long later I feel a small hand rub my back sympathetically and I know its Rue, so that's why I quickly brush my tears away with my jackets sleeve before pressing a quick chaste kiss to River's forehead then I turn around to Rue and force myself to give her a small smile that says what I can't at the moment, 'that its going to be okay and that I'm going to try my best to keep us both safe' she returns my smile and nods mutely. I don't waste any time before I get to my feet and take Rue's hand, leading her over to our backpacks, "we need to get what we need then leave so they can take … so they can take River's body" I make known trying my hardest to keep moving since Rue still needs me. Rue looks at me calculating before she nods mutely then we quickly dived us the haul between the two of us. After we're done I grab Rue's small hand in mine then pull her with me into the woods, not sparing River's body a glance because if I do then I will breakdown again.

Rue and I walk in comfortable silence alone the side of the woods as we keep going straight trying our hardest to be silent and stay unseen as we go. The woods have a heavy humid heat to it as we make our way through it all the while trying to find Gale, "you shouldn't have run dumbass" my subconscious snarls at me, I lick my lips and swipe my arm across my brow form the humidity while trying to make sure I take in everything around us so we don't get attacked by some tribute or mutt. My mouth feels dry, like I've been chewing on cotton all day. "We need to refill our water bottles, huh?" I ask, already knowing the answer before she says it. "Yeah" little bird puts forth in a small voice as she clings to my arm as we walk, I feel terrible that she's so scared for me to disappear and once again I feel a heavy cloud of self-loathing take over me as I think about our other ally.

I almost release a sigh of relief as the sun starts to lower and with that we're granted a ungodly amazing shade that compliments the breeze very well. As we walk I can't stop myself from thinking about what else the Gamemakers have planned for me and this alone have me swallowing with fear, not for myself but for my little bird, of what could happen to us but mainly of what could happen to Rue.

Before I know it we're on an empty field and we're running as a hard as we can run until we reach what looks like a wheat field. Once we enter the wheat field I make sure to grasp little birds hand in mine, making sure I have a good hold and view of her since I'm not wanting or even willing to have another one of my friends to die in front of me, my eyes rank over the long golden wheat when all of a sudden I hear a strange guttered growl that sound ungodly close to us, I freeze immediately pulling Rue close to my back as my hands hold her in place not willing to let anything happen to her while I'm able to do something about it. The wind blows around us harshly making the wheat blow almost majestically around us, I feel completely numb yet on alert as I stand stiff taking in our surroundings. The wind all of a sudden feels too stiff and everything seems too quiet for some reason then out of no where we hear a loud growl of sorts from a closer distance to us, which is followed closely by a strange long strain of clicking sounds and it definitely doesn't sound like something good so without a single thought in my head beside keeping Rue safe so I grab hold of her hand tightly before I pull her behind me at a brisk run. My mind is trying to sift through all of the mutts I've seen in past games but I've never heard anything like whatever made that sound and I already know without a thought that its meant to get me … to find me and kill me.

The wheat in front of us rustle some and immediately I stop but little bird runs into me, her tiny body making my fall forward, I lick my lips and keep my eyes wide and trained on the wheat in front of me as I slowly rise to my feet again, trying my hardest to not make any sound but something snaps underneath my foot as I try to take a step back, I immediately freeze then without a thought I turn my head some towards Rue but not taking my eyes off the wheat in front of us "Rue I want you to run okay. When I say go I want you to turn around and run as fast as you can, do you understand me?" I whisper lowly, my heart feels like its in my throat and I don't think I've ever been so scared rigid in my entire life. The wind blows gently at my back making a cold chill throughout my body as it cools the hot sweat that has broken out even more sever on my pale skin as I stare wide eye at the wheat in front of us. The wheat rustles again and I give Rue a small nudge backwards and breath out "go Rue. Run!" I feel her stall so hesitantly I tear my eyes away from the bushes and just as my eyes meet her big brown eyes I'm tackled to the ground, my head slams into something and everything is strangely airy seeming and feels ungodly wrong that I'm somehow now very tired. "Run now" I screech as stare up at my attacker, I swallow thickly as his brown eyes narrow at me and before I know it his large hands are around my throat and he's starting to add more and more pressure that I'm not able to breath anymore. I try thrashing around but he's way too heavy for me to fight off, my eyes are pricked with tears and I'm so scared. But I guess I'd rather just be strangled than raped and whatever else Cato and Clove have planned for me. My fingernails scratch and dig into his large hands as he tries to look away from me, "if you're your going to kill me have the decency to look me in the eyes as you do it" I want to scream at him.

Thresh tightens his hands around my throat and instantly my vision is plagued with black spots, then out of no where I hear an all to familiar voice that sends fear through my entire being "stop!" little birds scared voice screams from somewhere behind me where I had thought she had disappeared, I guess I thought wrong. "No" I think as I see Thresh's eyes dart over to where I now know where Rue is. He has a look of bewilderment across his face, his mouth slightly parted as beads of sweat line his brow, and then I'm on high alert as I feel his hands let go of my throat. I stare wide eyed at Thresh's body as he get off of me then too his feet and stumbles towards where I know Rue is and I'm beyond panicked, I pant wildly trying to pull in as much air as I can and it makes my lungs burn. "No, not her too" I think as I force myself to roll over even though I'm so light headed and pretty sure I've managed to get a concussion or something from how hard I hit my head … well, really its probably from how many time's I've hit my head while I've been in the arena. My legs feel uncooperative and shaky underneath me as I as quickly as I can force myself up onto my feet again then once I'm standing I see that Thresh is only a few feet away from Rue and I loose it, I charge at him making damn well sure I will hit him lower since it will take him down swifter not to mention it will be very easy for someone my height and weight. I silently thank the lord that my best friend just so happens to be the best in our years wrestling team. I bulldoze into Thresh as hard and fast as I can, and honestly I'm so surprised that I'm strong enough to take him down but I do and before either of us can think I throw myself on his back and start punching, scratching, and kicking as hard as I can, "run Rue!" I manage to scream out, my voice laced with my labored pants but still I don't deter my wild attack. My mind is empty of everything, no thoughts coming or gong. My body fills riddled with pain yet numb all at the same time.

I want to scream and cry as Thresh quickly maneuvers us so I'm pinned to the ground. He stares at me in amazement, not making a move to do anything further than look at me so I quickly grit out "just get it over with already!" my words make him turn his head to the side in confusion and infuriates me to no end, "please don't be a blood hungry killer" I think as stare at trying to will him to just snap my neck instead of drawling my death out. When I see Thresh glance over at where I had seen Rue just moments ago I loose all sense of trying to keep my death as pleasant as possible because I need to save my ally, "if you kill that little girl I swear I'll… "I trail off on my empty threat gaining a grin to pull at the corners of Thresh's cheeks and leave me feeling dread "you'll what?" he pulls, waiting for my answer. I open my mouth a few times and close it not being able to be come up with anything and he must sense this because he chuckles at me. Tears prick my eyes and I force myself to keep my voice strong so it doesn't quiver as well as try to keep my tears from falling, I won't give him or anyone that kind of satisfaction of my death. I won't be weak. I won't cry. And I most certainty won't try to plead for my life because I know it will only fall on deaf ears. I glare up at Thresh then quickly lick my chapped lips, my tongue grazes over a large split in my lip that makes me wince and causes Thresh to glance down in confusion and before he can do anything more or even speak I quickly put forth "if you go after her and … and … and kill her then your just like them. Your just as vile and savage as those careers and I swear to you that even though I can't do anything to avenge either of us someone will. Karma will come back around and bite you in the ass and I promise you that even though we're dead and you somehow win these games your going to be starting a whole new set of games once you leave here and I promise every time you close your eyes we'll be there, reminding you of what you done. Of how you killed us for no reason" my words start strong but then waver, not even being able to talk about my little bird being dead causes me to subconsciously let my tears leak out of my eyes and trail down my cheeks, however my eyes don't leave Thresh's as I speak, making damn well sure he knows what he's getting into and not even thinking about what I'm saying.

We stare at each other for a while then out of no where I hear Rue say in a teasing voice "just get off her Thresh, she already has a boyfriend" I let out a shaky breath as I turn my head awkwardly so I can see her, she stand off to the side of us a little. Her arms crossed over her chest while her little foot taps impatiently at the ground as she tries in vain to contain her smile then the next thing I know Thresh lets loose a booming laugh and gets off of me, once he gets to his feet he offers me a hand and I hesitantly take it not knowing if we can trust him but the look of pure bliss on Rue's face tells me I can. Once I'm on my feet again I quickly snatch my hand back from him like I've been burnt by fire and this makes him raise an eyebrow and me and I blush out of embarrassment because I don't know why I did it either, maybe I was subconsciously still reeling about thinking he was the enemy. I look down at my boots guiltily, kicking at the hard earth beneath my feet before I look back up. Rue is hugging Thresh tightly and it makes me feel so out of place that I'm not sure if I should maybe walk off a little bit to give these two some privacy to discuss whatever. I feel a pain in my hear lurch as I think about how I wish Gale and I could be friends but I know that will never happen, he hates me too much. I turn around awkwardly pulling at the end of my braid that is practically fully undone, I tug the hair tie free then place it around my wrist before I start tangling my fingers in my hair trying to undo the braid that seems to be knotted in places, as I fervently work on my hair my eyes well up with tears "you're the one who ran away from Gale. He tried to stop you but you wouldn't let him" my subconscious reminds me making me feel sick "and know Rue's got her district partner to look after her, she won't need you anymore" I think as my tears make it practically impossible to see but I try to ignore it "suck it up and stop being a baby Madge!' I silently tell myself as I finally manage to untangle my hair from the knot it had somehow got.

I honestly can't think of why I ran away from Gale. Maybe I was just scared to be so close to him because then that gave him the chance to hurt me in more ways then I like. He would have the power to tear me down and now that I know without a doubt that I love him I know I won't be able to bounce back like I usually do. I'll be to hurt by his stupid ignorant rants about me being so much better off than him, "yeah like that kept my name form being drawn" I think bitterly as I swiftly pull my hair up into a high pony tail, then I turn and look at Rue and Thresh who are quietly conversing. I swallow down my nerves then give myself a small pep talk "you can do this. Just tell them that your going to leave them and find your district partner, its better then being kicked out of the alliance I share with little bird … well I guess I can't call her that anymore" as I'm lost in my thoughts I don't notice Rue and Thresh walking over to me but instead I start biting nervously at my lip, I can't stop my head from being flood with what ifs. Like what if I get killed before I get to find Gale or what if Thresh decides to kill me here and now since I'm already close enough, just one more person keeping him away from the close looming top five, I stiffen when I feel a small hand touch my arm and immediately my eyes find those of Rue, who looks concern. I clear my throat then plaster a smile on "well I'll just be going now, yeah. Gale's probably looking for me and I need to find him … and now, well now you've got your district partner Rue and I know I'm just in the way and I get it, its nothing new so don't feel upset because its fine. I'm fine" I sputter out not really knowing what to say, I mean what do you say when your forced to leave the only friend you have in these games, the only person who shared so much what you've went through not to mention how I still want more then anything to keep Rue alive for as long as I cant but I know that that job lies with Thresh, her real friend.

I nod lamely to myself not wanting to wince at how stupid my words seem, "for a politicians daughter you'd think you'd have a better way with words" my subconscious says snidely making me internally wince knowing how right she is … I am. Rue looks at me confused, letting her small hand fall down to her side as a look of hurt passes through her eyes, making me immediately wish I didn't say anything "I should have just snuck off at night" I think as I curl my hands into tight fists at my side while I'm over came with self-loathing. "You called me Rue," Rue states in a small voice, barely over a whisper as she takes a step back from me then another until she's once again standing at Thresh's side. They both stare at me and I'm not sure what to do, I've never had to worry about these kinds of things since I never really had friends besides Peeta and di couldn't get rid of him even if wanted to. I shake my head, my mouth opening before closing shut tightly "I … don't you want me to leave?" I say after stumbling over my own words, Rue looks at me angrily "I thought we were friends Madge not just allies" she puts forth and I feel sick again, my eyes fly down to my boots and I can't think of anything to say because I know I shouldn't have just jump to conclusions especially when its people I care about. I release a shaky sigh but before I can even make more of a fool of myself Thresh speaks up "she probably just thought we'd want her to leave now that we're together. She probably wasn't trying to hurt your feelings Rue and I'm sure she'd be more than happy to stay with us" at the last part of his small speech I don't miss the pointed glare he gives me and in a strange way I'm glad he does it, not because I'm wanting to be put down so I feel better but because he must really care about my little bird. I smile at him and give him a jerky nod before I hesitantly walk over to Rue and stop, leaving a good distance between us since i know she's probably still mad at me.

I stand awkwardly in front of her not too sure what to say, Rue looks at me then sighs before she rushes forward and hugs me. I'm so taken back by this that I just stand there for a few seconds before I return her hug gladly, "don't talk about leaving again, okay" Rue puts forth, her voice slightly muffled by my jacket. I nod not caring that she can't see me, "yeah I got it little bird" I reply making her peek up at me and smile which makes me return it wholeheartedly before we both still and stiffen at the sound of that strange clicking sound again which sounds closer than it had initially been when we heard it the first time. On instinct I grab a hold of Rue then place her behind me just like I had done the first time, my eyes sweeping around until I find a sickly pair of almost molten red eyes that are made even scarier from the dark black that surround them. I swallow thickly feeling myself being pushed behind Thresh who I don't even look at instead I keep my eyes trained on those sinister looking eyes that seem to burn a whole right through me as it stares straight at me and I know this isn't a coincidence that this things here and staring right at me. My chest feels strangely heavy with both fear and sadness, "I'm going to be the reason that both my allies die" I think then before I can actually think things through and talk myself out of it I let go of Rue then shrug off my jacket that she is grasping onto tightly before I race around Thresh, "its meant for me just go" I shout over my shoulder at them before I begrudgingly keep up my decent pace as I charge straight towards my awaiting death and I know something has definitely snapped inside me because I feel a sense of peace and happiness that this whole nightmare will end, I won't have to see Rue die if she does. I won't have to kill another person and I won't have to hear Gale snare his heated words at me.

I don't make it too far away from Thresh and Rue because almost immediately I'm encased in a pair of arm and roughly shoves backwards, falling to the ground and a look of confusion takes over my face as I see both Rue and Thresh who look scared and unsure. I glance back at who shoved me and let my mouth fall open at the sight I find in font of me, not expecting him to have ever found me let alone wanting to help me. Right in front of me stands Gale Hawthorne but before I can process this, he's tackled to the ground by some large scary looking reptile type bird that right away starts snapping at Gale's throat and before I can think about what I'm doing I shove myself up from the ground then sprint towards Gale.


	16. Chapter 16 Allies and Confessions

*Author note- Sorry about the long overdue wait but my grandma died and I had to fly out to help with the arrangements as well for the funeral then i just was in a strange funk but I'm back and writing so once again I'm sorry guys. I hope you guys like this chapter :) Enjoy, please review, and please forgive any errors I've missed. Thank you to all my faithful readers of my little story it means a lot and keeps me writing you guys rock! -007twihunger xoxo

**_Chapter Sixteen: Allies and Confessions._**

My feet feel like they move entirely too slow for me and I can't help the strangled scream that sounds in my throat, nor the tears that start trickling down my cheeks as my mind becomes incredibly empty. The only thing I'm capable of thinking is that I need to get to Gale. He can't die. Not now, not ever. Its like my vision is tunneled and all I can see is Gale. I watch hopelessly as he lies underneath that vicious reptile bird as it slashed at him with it large sharp looking caws, its jagged snout/beak tries to snap at him and coming dangerously close to his face that I swear my hearts about to stop. I hear an ungodly screech, one filled with so much fear and heartbreak that I swear it was my own until I hear what the screech calls out "Gale!" then I know its definitely me. I feels like I get to him to slow but I know in reality it doesn't take me too long before I'm over to him since I was already so close to him. Without a thought in my empty frightened mind I immediately throw myself at the mutt and instantly knock it off Gale, coming to lie in a mess a few feet to Gale's side. Almost immediately the mutt slithers from underneath me and I feel a sharp prick of something into my back that makes me scream at the top of my lungs, feeling as if someone stabbed me in the spine with a few dozen daggers then set fire to them. My fingers dig into the earth as I try to pull myself away only to get dragged back by whatever is lodged into my back then before I can think and right when my watery eyes meet with Gale's intense gaze something sharp stabs into my right shoulder and a piercing shriek lets loose from me and everything starts getting fuzzy around the edges. For a second I could swear I hear Gale shout out "Madge!" before I let myself be dragged into nothingness.

Everything is so dark and I'm scared, and even though I'm no longer in pain I still feel a pain in my chest, nothing from any physical attack just from the thought of never seeing Gale again. I hear a small muffled whimper followed very closely by a desperate deep voice saying, "Undersee? Please god just open your eyes Madge. Please don't die … don't fucking give up Madge!, I just fucking found you … I can't loose you now…" before trailing off then I swear I feel something wet trickle down the side of my face before I force myself to pry my heavy tired eyes open and I'm met with a hard chest cladded with a black t-shirt that has my brows pinching together in confusion, until the person holding me tightly to there chest with surprisingly gentleness even with how much bigger they obvious are to me, moves back slightly. My eyes trail up the person's chest then throat until I'm met with stormy gray eyes of Gale Hawthorne.

Gale stares at me with watery eyes, a shaky breath making its way past his slightly parted lips as his eyes franticly searches mine then before I can grasp whats happening Gale pulls me into his chest and tightly hugs me and I'm not too sure which one of us is shaking, for all I know it could be both of us. "Oh god Madge I thought you were dead" Gale says, his voice is muffled by the crook of my neck, which Gale has buried his face in. I feel so confused and unsure so I just sit there with him hugging me tightly as I sit in his lap and before I can help myself as whimpered psychotic laugh bubbles out of my throat then I'm wrapping my arms around Gale's neck and hugging him back, knowing without a doubt I had to be dead. "If only you were like this when I was alive" I say to myself and I guess I say it out loud because the next thing I know Gale pulls back from me and stares at me with furrowed brows, we stare at each other until something … well more like someone wraps their small arms around my neck and hugs me from behind. I smile faintly and turn away from Gale to look at the tear stained face of my little bird, who looks petrified and scarred. My heart plummets in my chest and instantly I start remembering the attack, of how Gale saved me then I saved him only to turn the attack back on me again, but how did I survive?

I know my face must show my thoughts because the next thing I know Gale leans in towards my ear and whispers "later," lowly for only me to hear. I look at him for a little bit then hesitantly nod before I let my arms drop from behind Gale's neck only to turn my body slightly and pull my little bird into my arms and hug her tightly to myself. My fingers deftly brush through her slightly matted hair as I stare blankly around at the wheat field that surrounds us, my eyes roam around unseeingly as I finally come to grasp with how numb I feel. My eyes widen and I start to shake when I see a dried puddle of blood on the broken wheat, I must have been attacked on. In an instance I fling myself away from Rue and let a shriek loose as my eyes frantically search for my attacker only to realize that I'm safe, my eyes lock with confused steel gray eyes "I think she's loosing it" I can swear I hear Thresh whisper lowly for only Gale to hear but I do hear and I know he actually said it when Gale glares over at him before slowly walking towards me like I'm a wounded animal that might flee in fright. My eyes quickly seek out little bird who looks at me with concern and fear which makes me feel sick. "Get your shit together Undersee" I think closing my eyes tightly trying to think of anything but all the carnage I've seen and have dealt out to the other tributes while I've been in the arena. When a pair of strong arms wrap around me and pull me into a warm and sturdy chest I can't help but let loose a slight whimper as my eyes meet gray ones before I'm grasping Gale tightly to myself "thank you" I breath out for only him to hear then as fast as I can I extract myself from him and numbly walk back over to Rue, who I offer up a small smile of reassurance which she grasps onto like a life raft then she rushes to me once again and buries her face into my shirt.

I sit with Rue in my lap, running my fingers through her hair slowly and gently untangling knots as I go making sure to not hurt my little bird, all the while my eyes stay locked on Gale and Thresh who are conversing quietly amongst themselves a good distance from us so we can't hear but close enough so they can keep and eye on us. I don't miss the periodical glances sent our way, not just from Thresh but from Gale as well. Blue clashes with gray and I'm rendered breathless from the pitiful look Gale gives me, so much so that I have to force myself to look up at the sky, taking in the faint gray stormy looking clouds that have at some point today moved into the murky blue sky. The wind blows at my hot skin making it even more cool and refreshing than it already would be if I wasn't sweating. My eyes flicker close as a flash of Glimmers twitching body comes to mind then I'm subconsciously gritting my teeth and trying to stop the montage of bloody kills my mind seems to play. I try focusing on my breathing, making it as calm and as normal as possible then I try to focus on returning my fingers to work in Rue's hair but neither of those seems to deter any off my ill thoughts of blood and death. "Come on Madge! Do you think Katniss would lay down and just give up … would May?" I think forcing my eyes open so I'm once again staring at the looming sky above. "Blue things" I think trying to force my mind to think about anything at all besides what its subconsciously trying to think about. I nod my head forcefully making myself man up and think about anything and everything that is blue. The wind blows again but this time it makes me shiver as well as seems to howl lowly around us making me shiver once again then hold tighter to Rue making sure I don't hurt her in the least, "Peeta's eyes are blue" I mutter lowly to myself not caring that Rue looks up at me with furrowed eyebrows or that out of the corner of my eye I see Gale's head snap unnaturally towards me, instead I ignore them completely and think about more blue things to add to my list.

It seems to take longer than I know it should take since there is a lot of thing blue but because my mind is so clouded with the horrors of the games it take me much longer but when I get another one it seems to have a snowball effect and I can't stop my mind from listing all the blue things that hastily pop up in my mind. "My eyes are blue and so are May's, my moms, and little Primrose Everdeen. The sky is blue and so is water. Some flowers are blue, some birds are too. I have dresses at home that are blue … I had dresses that were blue … wonder if my father did everything I told him to. Did he follow through with our agreement or is he going to hoard it and keep it as a shrine of his late daughter who died in the hunger games? Is he waiting for my death to do it? Will Katniss or even the Hawthorne's accept my gifts or refuse them thinking its charity?" my face quickly turns to a frown as I silently think about all the worries that I know should be the furthest thoughts in my head but there not there front and center, not letting me forget about it even for a second but hey I guess that's better than the blood and gore that was just looming over my thoughts a little while ago. Not too long later a pair of strong arms wrap tentatively around me before pulling me securely into a warm sturdy chest, immediately my nose is engulfed in the very familiar and heavenly scent of smoke and mint "I wonder if I smell like smoke as well?" I think as my mind is bombarded with the fires I've made while we've been in the arena. "No. You smell like strawberries, like home…" Gale's gruff voice whispers into my hair making me wrap my arms around his waist, not wanting him to be done comforting me and not understanding how he read my mind. I look at Gale with close scrutiny thinking I might not have heard him right but then he's looking back at me and must see my confusion because he lets out an annoyed sigh then steps back from me "you were talking out loud Undersee. Come one … Thresh and I decided we should move out of the fields and back into the woods. It will be a lot safer in there since we can have a greater advantage in seeing if anything comes for us, career or mutt." Gale makes known awkwardly, rubbing at the back of his neck as he walks away from me and back over to Thresh, who Rue stands next to. Its like an instant my mind filters back through what Gale said and when it comes across how he said I smelled like home I can't help the goofy hopefully smile from spreading across my face or from blurting out "I remind you of home?" and I could swear I seen a hint of a blush on the back of his slightly tanned neck.

I don't wait for Gale to tell me to follow him again since I don't feel like having him start back up with his old ways of treating me foully, not now since I know what it feels like to have him be nice to me … that and I don't think I could muster up anymore strength to try and keep myself strong. Not with him hating me, not again.

Gale leads in the front while Rue and I are in the middle and Thresh bringing up the rear. We all try to keep our steps as soundless as we can as we follow Gale, but the occasional wince Gale subconsciously does tells me we're not doing a good job in the least. I don't know when little birds hand comes intertwined with mine or even who did it but I'm grateful for it, it keeps me grounded in away, keeps me remembering that I'm here in the games and I can't afford to check out, not now while I can still keep little bird and Gale safe. I don't realize I'm too wrapped up in my own head until I'm startled by some rain drops that has me quickly yanking Rue with me forward as I rush towards Gale then grasp onto the back of his shirt making him stop and looks back at me while I stumble and slam into him awkwardly, taking Rue to the ground with me as I fall. Thresh easily pulls Rue from the ground while I ignore Gale's outstretched hand and push myself up to my feet before I slowly brush the dirt from my clothes, not wanting to look at anyone from the embarrassment I feel burning a blush onto my face. I can feel three pairs of eyes burning in me but I ignore them and start walking in the direction Gale way heading, hoping beyond hope that they'll follow me and won't bring up my new eccentric behavior. "Stop being dumb Madge. You've lasted this long so this is definitely not the time to break down and turn into a shell of who I was.

I'm more than thankful as I hear the soft muffled footsteps that follow behind me but the steps I don't hear don't make Gale invisible to my senses since I can feel his presence only a few feet behind me. "Time for a quick break, we can gather some supplies while they fest for a bit then we can head on to find a safe place for the night. "Gale puts forth grabbing a hold of my upper bicep to stop me since I'm not paying attention, but as I look back at him I see his words are targeted at Thresh who looks just as tired I know we all are. My eyes sweep over to little bird and take in her watery brown eyes as she stares off to the right like she's lost in thought. My eyebrows furrow subconsciously as my eyes follow her line of sight until my breath is knocked out of me as I take in the cave we once stayed in with River. My heart lurches then plummets as I stare unseeingly at the cave as my mind filters through the short time of knowing River. He was such a nice person, looking out for Rue and me as if he was our protector when I was the one trying to protect the two of them. I let a laugh bubble out of me as I think about how River would probably glaring at Gale if he were here right now. He'd be making Gale's life hell while he could just because he cared about me, just as soon as the laugh starts it dies in my throat as I feel myself to fill to the brim with numbness as I remember how he died saving me and once again my mind is plagued with blood and death but this time its worse, this times it about a boy who I knew as my friend. The boy who was trying to be a man in a game he had no reason of being in. My mind is only letting me replay the way I seen River thrashing on the ground struggling to breath all because he saved me. My eyes squeeze shut tightly as I feel like everything is spinning around me, the next thing I know I trip over something and come crashing to the ground and my eyes catch a glimpse of something black in a tree near me then I'm frantically screeching "River get Rue and hide" as I stumble to my feet only to slam into the hard chest of Gale Hawthorne. I stare at him perplexed not knowing what happened until I realize I'm loosing my mind. I'm going crazy and there's nothing I can do … there's nothing anyone can do. Gale stares at me with this look that makes me want to fun for the hill and hide in some hole. He looks at me like I'm crazy and I know its becoming clearer that I am but it doesn't stop the pain that courses though my stomach and chests as my mind starts trying decide if I should take flight but before I can think anything further or even do anything Rue rushes into my arms and hugs me tightly as she begins to bawl, gut-wrenching sobs that makes me somehow come back to what I need to be doing for her if not for myself.

I wrap my arms tentatively around Rue's small frame and start to hum barely audible as I avoid Gale and Thresh's intense stares that feel like are burning holes into my skin. "It's okay, I promise everything is okay little bird. I … I just got lost in my head for a minute but I promise … I … I'll try to stop it from happening again" I find myself whispering after awhile then I pull back from Rue, holding her at arms length away from me as I stare into her large brown eyes that are rimmed red. She nods as a sniffle wracks her small frame then she gives me a more confident nod that makes me smile "there's my tough ally" I joke making her laugh watery at me as she swipes at the leftover tears on her face. "We're staying here tonight" I say after a moment. My voice is surprisingly strong and filled with finality as my eyes slowly come to rest on Gale's, he gives me a narrowed stare before stepping towards me which makes me give Rue's shoulders a reassuring squeeze then I move in front of her towards Gale, not letting him think for even a second that I'll back down. Not for this. Not for the one last reminder of River we have after his untimely and horrific death. If he thinks I'm going to let him boss me around just because I love him then he has another thing coming. "We can't stay here Undersee it's not safe not to mention there's no place to stay." I glare at Gale matching his scowl that he's now directing at me. I take another step towards him then poke him in the chest hard making me grit my teeth from the pain that flows through my pointer finger "my names Madge! It has been for a while and you know it so drop the shit and stop calling me fucking Undersee Gale! I understand we're not friends and that you despise me but that doesn't mean you have to be so nasty towards me. We're working as a team. We're all allies here so start fucking treating me like it!" I grit out, clenching my hands into fists not caring that my fingernails are digging into my palms sharply or that I feel something warm trickle through my fingers on my fight hand, telling me I'm bleeding. I release an whoosh of air then move back from Gale as I force myself to open my aching fingers, trying to stop myself from doing and saying anything too drastic. When I open my eyes, I'm staring at a slightly concern Gale which makes me even more infuriating "how can he stand here in front of me acting as if he cared what happened to me then not even a full minute ago he's being his old asshole self." I think trying to let my anger glide off my back.

It take a little bit for me to fight down my anger and I'm surprised that Gale stays quiet the whole time, just staring at me. "Look I'm sorry I shouldn't have snapped at you." I put forth running my fingers through my hair that has obscure my vision then I shake my head looking at Gale "its perfectly safe here, I should know I've stayed here before. There's a cave hidden and I'm pretty sure it could fit us all in it. Rue and I will fix up the cave so we have places to sleep while Thresh and you set up some traps and snares" Gale looks at me strangely but then shakes his head 'no' making me narrow my eyes at him and him to smirk at me, which makes me have to fight back the warm feelings in my chest that try to find its way to the surface of my feelings but I'm not having that. I cock an eyebrow at him, "why? It's a perfectly good plan to go by Gale" I question crossing my arms over my chest making him smile a small smile at me and instantly I'm not irritated or even upset with him anymore "damn stupid good looking smug bastard" I think trying to somehow bring back my anger but knowing I can't. I let out a sigh then drop my arms from in front of my chest, "because I think we … I mean I … we should talk Under I mean Madge. Thresh and Rue are more than capable at collecting some fruit and plants while I help you setup camp and have a much needed discussion." He states confidently, his eyes staring over my right shoulder and not at me at all. I nod hesitantly but only after sending a glance to little bird, who nods reassuringly telling me silently 'it will be okay.'

Gale and I watch silently as Rue and Thresh walk off a little way talking lowly before we're thrust into an ungodly tense silence that I quickly extract myself from mumbling "I'm going to get started" before walking off towards the hidden cave and from the close heat on my back I know Gale's following which causes me to swallow nervously and pick up my pace a little more.

We work quietly setting up the two three sleeping bags we have as well as piling some soft leaves and moss underneath them so they will be soft instead of having to bear the hard rocky ground. After we're done situating everything I sit back on one of the makeshift beds and to my undying joy yet fear Gale sits down next to me. I have to force myself to look at my knotted fingers which I start wringing so I won't be staring at Gale. As I begin to think we're going to be thrown into another awkward filled silence Gale clears his throat gaining my eyes to flicker over to him and find he is already staring at me intently. His face is emotionless and this scares me. I'd rather have him scowling at me or even glaring since I would at least know what he's feeling somewhat. "Listen Madge … I'm really sorry. I shouldn't be being an asshole to you its just I don't know you're the only one who can get under my skin like that and well … you know we always act that way I guess old habits die hard. Thanks by the way fro saving me, it was stupid as hell but heroic and I know that I won't ever be able to really express how much it means to not only me but my family and …" he trails off awkwardly. His face pinching together as some internal battle rages on inside of him, I just sit quietly by his side taking in his face and taking in the few scars that mar it but honestly it adds to his handsomeness, it gives him that rouged handsomeness that tells you he's not afraid to fight for what he wants and work for what he needs. I can't help but respect him even more than I already do. Gale glances at me and seems to stare into my soul with how intent his stare is then before I can ask him whats wrong he quickly leans forward, pressing his chapped lips to mine making me go stiff and stare at him, taking in his closed eyelids not knowing what to think let alone do so I just sit there and let Gale press his lips harder against mine trying to make me have some type of reaction but when he pulls back and takes in the tears gliding down my cheeks its not what he thought it might be.

I shake my head at him as a sob chokes in my throat then I quickly spring to my feet then storm out of the cave as my tears pick up, "Madge! Please Madge wait!" Gale calls behind me and before I make it any further away from him he grabs a hold of my shoulders then wheels me around so I'm staring into his scowling face, "what? What did I do wrong Madge, I thought that's what you wanted? You … you said you loved me…" Gale starts then trails off weakly, his eyes searching from one then the other of my eyes as I try to blink away my openly flowing tears. Subconsciously I shake my head then rip myself away from Gale's grasp and take a few steps back so there's at least somewhat of a distance between us even though I want nothing more for him to love me back and kiss me instead of kissing me out of pity, like he owed it to me just because I saved him from getting what happened to me happen to him. "No Gale that's not what I want. I don't want you kissing me when you don't mean it, just doing it because you feel like you owe me something when you know you don't … When you have…" I put forth trying to keep my voice from wavering with my sobs but with no avail until I'm cut off from saying Katniss's name as Gale slams his lips to mine again and this time its so hard to push him away but I do and I'm not too sure how I mustered up the courage to do so but I do. I press my hands flat against Gale's sturdy chest then push him away from me … well more accurately push myself back from him as my shiny tear rimmed eyes glare at him. I shake my head furiously, "you can't do that! You can't do things that when you know you don't feel the same about me Gale you just can't. Please stop your killing me here" I sob out taking a step back from him as he tries to take a step towards me. He looks so horrified like he can't believe how I'm acting over him "I guess he never realized the effect he has on girls" I think as I try to control the tremors rolling through my body from my sobs. Gale takes a hesitant step towards me and this time I can't bring myself to move away from him because he's breaking my heart not caring that he's trying to give me thing that have no meaning behind them and because I can't take it anymore I let my body go limp and fall towards the ground as another sob wracks through my body but I don't hit the ground, Gale's arms wrap around me and he hugs me to his chest and because I can't stomach not having Peeta here to comfort me I hug Gale back as I sob uncontrollably into my chest wishing more than anything he loved me even a sliver of how much I love him.

After a while Gale gently scoops me up then carries me back into the cave where he sits down and pulls me into his lap then begins to hesitantly rub comforting circles into my back and we're thrust into more silence as my tears come to an end but even then I don't let go of Gale and neither does he. We stay like that for a while longer before Gale clears his throat making me flinch form the loud rumble in his chest. My eyes trace over the tear in the knee of his pants not wanting to look up at him but when he clears his throat again, this time louder I let out a sigh and look up into his eyes fearing whats to come. We stare at each other of a little bit before Gale's tongue darts out of his mouth and wets his lips "but it does mean something to me Madge. I wouldn't do it if it didn't. I like … I love you too Madge it just took me a little bit longer to come to grasp with it since I always thought you were out of my reach, because of where I come from … your just too good Madge especially for a stupid seam kid like me. All I had to look forward to is the mines and you … you had everything at your fingertips, did you honestly think I could ever think I was good enough for you?" I stare at Gale in confusion and shake my head as I swipe at my tear stained cheeks, "but you have…" I trail off as he shakes his head at me. His gray eyes drop down before glancing back up at me "that was before I knew I stood a chance. Before I knew you wanted me too…" and that's all I let him say before I practically throw myself at him and kiss him. at first he's surprised and doesn't do anything but when I start to pull back from him he locks his arms around me and pulls me closer as his lips come alive against mine.

His lips move against mine and I feel tingles through out my body and a warm churning feeling in my stomach like I'm on cloud nine. No kiss I've shared with Rye can compare to kissing Gale in the least, kissing him makes me feel like I'm breathing air for the first time from drowning and I can't get enough of him and from the way he kisses me back just as much he must feel the same way. In no universe did I ever think I would be kissing Gale Hawthorne let alone him kissing me back but I am and he is and it couldn't be any better … well unless we weren't in the hunger games. The thoughts like an open flame and when it comes to my mind I feel like I'm burnt and instantly I pull back from Gale, we're both panting heavily and I'm trying to hold down the blush that I already know is coloring my cheeks red but for the life of me I could careless about who sees since I'm frantically trying to think about all that Gale has told me and he must see the wheels a turning in my head because he scoots closer to me and gives me a breathless smile "I'm sorry it took me so long to get here … to get us here, but I promise I won't leave you waiting for me any longer" he breaths out barely above a whisper as he tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear making me blush even more as my eyes come to rest on his hand which has just intertwined with my own and causes me to smile.

We settle into a comfortable silence, Gale leaning against the cave wall holding me against him as he runs his fingers through my loose hair while I lean against him and soak up all the happiness I can since I know it won't last since I know he has to be the one going home not me. he has a family and all I would come back as a hollow shell of myself and god knows it probably wouldn't take me long before I killed myself form all the flashbacks I know will plague my life like I've seen it do to countless victors that I've met but unlike me a lot of them are strong enough to bottle everything up and move forward, knowing they have people and things to take care of. Who would I have, Peeta? Yeah until he falls in love and leaves me. I close my eyes and force my haunting thoughts away just wanting to revel in the bliss of Gale Hawthorne actually liking me … no loving me. In the back of my mind I feel like something is off but I can't put my finger on it so maybe its just nothing and I'm being paranoid.

I must fall asleep because the next thing I know I'm being startled awake by the very familiar laugh of my little bird which makes me sit up and glance around the cave until I spot her and smile sleepily at her as she tries to contain her laughing behind her small hands. I let out a small laugh as I burry my face in my hands under the pretense of scrubbing at my tired eyes but really I'm hiding my red face knowing I must be the shade of a tomato from being caught by my allies all cozied up with Gale. I clear my throat then give Gale a nudge as I feel his chest rumble underneath me form his chuckles. "So you guys together now?" Thresh's booming voice asks making me groan out of embarrassment before hastily getting to my feet and even faster busying myself with taking my hair down then braiding it into a crown on top of my head like my mother use to do for me when I was younger, with the thought of my mother I frown but it doesn't last too long since my attention is snapped back to the present as Gale tosses one of the water bottles at Thresh, his face a lovely shade of pink from a blush "shut up" he gets out as he gets to his feet and brushes off invisible dirt, this makes Thresh laugh and causes Rue and me to smile from the contagious glee that comes with his rich and hearty laugh. Thresh looks over at Rue and me then back over to Gale raising an eyebrow at him, "did you know he talked about you a lot while we've been searching for you two?" Thresh asks which is closely followed by Gale rushing forward at him only for Thresh to laugh once again and run behind little bird and me causing us to giggle at his childish behavior. Gale and him circle around us, Gale trying to reach Thresh to shut him up while Thresh is trying to stay away from him.

"Oh really, and what did he all say about me?" I ask innocently giving Thresh a sly smile which causes him to let loose another booming laugh as Gale looks at me with wide eyes for even indulging in this type of childish behavior "what? I hang out the Mellark boys too much to even pretend I'm not use to this kind of shenanigans" I state with a shrug of my shoulders before I let out a screech as Gale throws me over his shoulder and tries to run me away from Thresh but I know its all just playing around since we're all laughing very loud and carefree. From my position slung over Gale's shoulder I can see Thresh and little bird run out after us as Gale jogs leisurely around a few near by trees trying to act keep us away from them making little bird and me giggle even more but then there's a beeping followed by a loud yet muted thud that causes us to all freeze and search around us for anything that could hurt us until we all are staring at the rather large parachute attacked to an equally large sponsor container that Thresh hesitantly walks over as Gale sets me down. We're all sober from the carefree laughter we were just in.

Little bird rushes over to me and together we walk behind Gale over to Thresh who is reading the white note that was inside, his eyes immediately seek out Gale's and just looks at him in confusion then hands him over the card and because Gale is so much taller than me as well with how fast he yanks the card to himself I can't even catch a glimpse of anything "what does it say?" I question holding Rue's hand in my own. Thresh glances over at us then back over to Gale, "read it" he tells him, its not a request it's a demand and it leaves me feeling unhinged by the look he has and the way his voice is void of any emotion. My eyes look pleadingly towards Gale who looks pained, trying to not look at me and this alone has me dropping Rue's hand and stepping closer to him "Gale … what does it say?" I rasp out, my throat feeling tight and my heart feeling numb and then I see the sadness in Gale's eyes. The one he had on the day his father died, the blank sadness that shown out at me as I handed him the compensation pay envelope since I couldn't bear to look at his distraught and very pregnant mother. This look alone has me stopping in my tracks and stopping my arm midway in the air then instantly recoil and take a hesitant step back as if that could help with whatever is written on the piece of paper. Gale opens his mouth then closes it only to repeat the process before I watch as his Adams apple bobs in his throat then his eyes are casted down to the ground and I can't take not knowing anymore. I deftly hurry forward and snatch the piece of paper form Gale's hand before he can do anything but that doesn't stop him from trying to run after me as well as saying "give it back Madge" only to be blocked by Thresh who gives me a sad look. With hesitation heavy in my chest I lick my lips then let out a shaky breath and glance down at the pristine slightly crinkled piece of paper and read

You guys are doing great in there. Keep smart and stay armed the rest of the careers left are fighters. Enjoy the lavish banquet we've put together for you, and Madge I'm so sorry about the loss of your mother - F.O.

I stare at the piece of paper, at the words that hold so much meaning yet are so small and nothingness. My eyes immediately fill with tears as I crumble the vile piece of paper into my hands and make sure its into a crumpled up ball before I let it drop to the ground then I see a movement out of the corner of my eye and look up only to see Gale standing only a few feet away from me giving me that sad look again and I can't take anymore of that look so I turn around and blot into the cave knowing I can't be careless and run off into the woods again since it could get on of my allies killed. I throw myself down on the furthest sleeping bag away from the others and face the wall as I work my body into a ball as if that could somehow diminish the ache and pain that fills throughout my chest as my tears start spilling as if they will never stop. I can't even find it in me to tell who ever sits behind me and starts rubbing my back to leave me alone because my mother is dead and I knew this would happen. She's dead and she didn't even get to see me as me but as May. She's dead and it has to be somehow my fault. She's dead and I'm even more of a broken shell of the girl I was, but this time I know that there's not that much chance for me to really resurface from the pain that seems to consume my arching heart so I just let the waves of depression grab ahold of me as my body wracks with never-ending sobs and surprisingly the person trying to comfort me doesn't leave the whole time until I cry myself to sleep.


	17. Chapter 17 Understandment

*Author note- Ahh I'm back to my everyday uploads YEEEEAAAAHHH! Lol sorry about that :) just really happy to be back to my normal funky flow of life and such. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, please review, and sorry for any errors I may have missed. -007twihunger xoxo

**_Chapter Seventeen: Understandment_**

I awake from my sleep by the sound of thunder in the distant which makes me squeak with fear but then I swallow down the sound seeing that an arm is slung over my waist holding me close to something really warm, my eyes stare down at the slightly tan hand and I think for a minute its River that is until I turn slightly and see the sleeping face of Gale. I stare at him for a few seconds not feeling anything but numbness that seems to have eaten me whole but then my eyes flicker to the cave entrance where I think I hear what sounds like music and my eyes meet both the tributes of district eleven. Rue sits close to Thresh, her little arms wrapped tightly around her knees holding them close as both her and Thresh stare up into the sky and immediately I know it must be the death count so ever so gently and slowly I slide Gale's arm off my waist which makes him frown slightly in his sleep before he rolls over and a low snore falls from his lips making me smile as I unzip the sleeping bag we're sharing before I zip Gale back in and pad over to our allies from eleven who don't look up at me as I walk over to them, they just continue looking into the sky. I take the seat next to Thresh since its closer to the caves entrance and I will have more air getting to me.

Just as my eyes meet the sky the capital seal disappears and I feel like I'm punched in the gut as I see the kind face of River lit up in the sky. I stare at his picture unblinkingly until it disappears then the music cuts off and we're thrown back into darkness which is surrounded by the pitter-patter of the rain falling outside. "Are you okay?" Thresh asks from my side making my head snap over to him and that's when I realize I'm shaking and as I look over at Rue I see that she is but unlike me she's crying where as I think my tears dried up sometime ago with all the crying I've been doing in here, that or the lack of water I've been drinking lately. My eyes flicker over to where Gale is still sleeping before I look back to Thresh who looks honestly concern but that can't be right we hardly know each other and I'm not too sure if I'd still be alive if it wasn't for having little bird with me when he attacked me. My mouth opens then clamps shut then I glance down as my eyebrows furrow, "am I okay?" I think. The wind howls making me fold into myself, both appreciating the cold breeze on my clamming flesh and hating the cold feeling that it leaves like something bad grabbing ahold of you. Something warm drapes over my shoulders causing me to glance up and see that Thresh has placed his jacket over my shoulders making me look up at him "maybe he does actually care" I think and before I can really think it through I blurt out "no. I don't think I'll feel better ever again. I feel like I'm broken … with all the people I've killed of what I've seen and done here … of the people I hurt and the ones who are hurt because of me. I don't think its possible for me to be okay again" my words are almost lost in the breeze since there spoken barely above a whisper but the sadness I see from both the tributes from eleven tells me they heard me, I give them a sad attempt at a smile before pulling Thresh's coat closer to myself "thanks by the way …. Not just for the jacket but for looking out for Gale and not killing me" I put forth trying to turn the bitter sadness that seems to linger around us into a brighter mood which seems to be working from the low rumble of laughter I hear from Thresh, he shakes his head at me "I should be thanking you for looking out for Rue. She's not my sister or anything but she's from home and I want her to be safe … just like Gale wants you to be safe" he makes known making me nod hesitantly as that same feeling of something nagging me that I'm not realizing starts to fester in the back of my mind but before I can start thinking about what it is Rue leans forward so she's looking at me "I told him about River … is that okay?" her small voice asks, worry prominent in her eyes that even in the dark I can see with the help form the moon which is brighter than any normal moon would be.

I don't say anything for a seconds, just stare at her taking in the worried expression she wears "its fine. He was your friend and ally too" I point out giving my shoulders a small shrug as well as a small smile even though just talking about River makes a pang of pain shoot through my chest. Rue stares at me for a while longer then nods letting out a small sigh of relief as we settle into a comfortable silence that is soon broken by Thresh once again, "I wasn't kidding when I said Gale talked about you" I glance over at him slightly, taking him in from the corner of my eye before I turn my attention back towards the star filled sky. "You know back in district twelve we you can't see the stars from town … I think its because of all the streetlamps we have there, but in the seam you can see them all … what does he say about me?" I ponder aloud before drifting the conversation back towards Gale, knowing that I can't stop the part of me that is longing for any type of information about the brooding seam boy I've liked forever and I don;;t think that will change the short time I have left in these games with him since it hasn't stopped since now. I feel Thresh shift next to me then stretch his long legs out in front of himself. "Yeah what did he say about her?" little birds small voice pipes up making me smile and glance over at her and making me suppress a smile as I see her goofy smile and wide eyes like its some type of romantic fairytale Thresh is about to tell. Thresh laughs one of his deep booming laughs that makes me smile even wider turning to face the entrance again before I rest the side of my face against my pulled up knees. "Well we ended up running into each other a couple days into the games and we were both poised to attack each other, Gale had his knife pointed at my throat and I had my spear targeted at his chest … in all honesty I think I would have made it out since Gale's not that tough. He's like a little baby or a small dog" Thresh starts then stops as we're all overcame with laughter that we try to muffle with our hands so we don't wake Gale.

After we've all calmed down little bird swiftly crawls over to me and snuggles up to my side so subconsciously drape Thresh's coat more over her and start absentmindedly rubbing at her back with my fingertips. "We just stared at each other, neither one of us making the first move and then he asked me if I wanted to team up and I said yeah. In the beginning for the most part we were both quiet just talking when we needed to like with him teaching me how to do some snares or us talking about where we should go and where we should take up shelter at night. But then one day I let my curiosity get the best of me and asked if you two were anything to each other and he got all defensive and snapped at me asking me why I cared so that kind of gave me the inkling he liked you … at least some what you know. Anyway I decided to check out my theory later that night, we were cooking some fish we caught earlier and I said that I hope I get to meet you before your done in because you sure are pretty and the next thing I know he tackles me to the ground and presses his knife to my throat and warns me that if I ever so much as touch you he won't hesitate to kill me. After that he stormed off and I didn't see him for a day … I kind of thought I upset him and made him leave our alliance and that made me feel like sh...Bad" he adds on glancing over at little bird for his almost slip up on a cussword. I glance down and take in the Rue's somehow fast asleep and I guess it really shouldn't surprise me since we've had a pretty tough time in these games. With River and Avery's death, with all the mutts thrown at us and whatever the Gamemakers send our way, and not to mention with the careers now hell-bent on getting me. I swallow thickly as a chill runs up my back almost forcing me to clench my shaking hands in hope to stop the trembling to them bunt instead I force myself to keep up the slow rhythmic stroke my fingers make on Rue's back, wanting nothing more than to keep Rue calm and thinking I'm fine for however long I can keep it up.

We're thrust into a steady comfortable silence before I clear my throat then pick little bird up awkwardly but Thresh quickly takes her from my arms and give me a small smile that I return then we both walk over to one of the empty sleeping bags which I quickly unzip for Thresh to place her in which he does. Not before too long Thresh and I are both sitting in our spots next to the cave entrance, Thresh nimbly rolls his spear between his hands as I nervously stare out into the darkness making sure I don't see anything that would endanger us. "When Gale and I ran back into each other he looked so distraught … it took a while of me badgering him until he snapped at me telling me he found you but he fucked it up and caused you to leave, that seemed to open up some filter or something because then he just wouldn't shut up. It was all Madge this and that. Did you know she's once of the few town people who is actually nice to people and not just people from town, she's nice to the people from the seam as well. She's too nice and too pretty for her own good … you should hear some of the things the boys back home say about her. If it wasn't for who her dad is then I'm sure she'd have to be beating them off with a stick. And she's so fucking smart, too smart for her age. She helps out over at my siblings school … its not like how teachers try and teach them … she actually cares about helping them learn and understand … she … she is so patient and not just with little kids but with me. I know she could easily tell on me for some of the things I say to her but she doesn't, she will get this cute angry little face where her eyebrows scrunch together and her eyes crinkle around the edges and she will give it all back to me just as bad if not worse." Thresh puts forth then turns his voice into a lame attempt at sounding like Gale that I want to laugh but as he keeps talking my heart feels so warm and light and I feel like I want to smile and dance around from how happy I am because Gale has noticed me and he loves me too.

My eyes glance over to Thresh taking in the expression on his face that tells me he's waiting for my response but I don't have one. I have no idea what to say and even if I did I would rather say it to Gale and not our ally. I clear my throat rather loudly making me wince as Gale lets out a low groan then he's sitting up bolt right and his head jerks around the dark cave until he comes to rest on Thresh and me near the entrance of the cave before he hastily gets to his feet and makes his way over to us rubbing at his eyes, a scowl taking over his face as his eyes look between the two of us. "What's going on?" his gruff voice demands as his eyes lock on me then even quicker turn to glare at Thresh. I open my mouth only to close it then repeat the process two more times before Thresh comes to my rescue "nothing man just taking up watch and she couldn't sleep" Thresh puts forth with a roll of his eyes likes it obvious. Gale licks his lips then looks back over at me then motions for me to come back to bed with him with a subtle gesture of his head which I hesitantly nod to then I get up "night" I whisper to Thresh, keeping my eyes casted downward as I walk back to my sleeping bag with Gale close on my heels. I don't wait for him to get to me but instead quickly get back into the sleeping bag and scoot over so I'm leaving as much room for Gale as I can then he's climbing into the sleeping bag as well and we're both quiet, the silence hanging over us with a heavy tension infused to it.

The cave is silent besides the occasional whistling of the wind outside before I feel Gale's hand grab onto my bicep and gently yet forcefully turns me so I'm laying face to face with him, his gray eyes burn into mine making me feel uncomfortable about the way he makes me feel exposed like I'm spread open for him to read like a book and it scared the shit out of me since no one has ever made me feel this way before. He doesn't say anything to me so neither do I. I let the silence continue waiting for him to make the first move to break the bubble of tension that seems to be just circled around us. I can't help myself from going ridged as I feel Gale's rough callus hand trails down my arm from my inner elbow all the way down until his fingers intertwine with mine and as this happens I can't help but think how soft his hands are. "How are you feeling?" Gale's gruff voice cuts through the silence as if he yelled it across an empty plane at me instead of him whispering it to me from where he lays a good few inches away from me. My lips becomes ensnared between my teeth as his eyes burn even more into me and his thumb begins to start gently stroking over the top of my thumb and hand making me even more unable to speak so I just try to swallow past my now dry throat before I offer him up a jerky nod that makes him release a low sigh that I'm pretty sure he doesn't want me to hear but I do. My eyes divert down so I'm staring at his shirt cladded chest but before we're overtaken with the tension filled silence I'm growing to dislike very much Gale breaths out "my dad died when I was younger and I know it was under different circumstances but I understand how it feels if you need someone to talk to about it." I don't say anything or even offer up a lame nod instead my head jerks up and I'm staring into Gale's eyes once again and this time I feel like their pulling me in and I'm not trying to stop it in the least.

Our lips meet in a rush. A clash of teeth and noses as it quickly turns even more heated. I follow his lead with the kiss and soon find myself underneath Gale's body, my hands fisted into the back of his shirt as we break apart, me panting trying to get my breathing evened out as Gale moves on to kiss and nip down my throat which makes me let loose a breathy moan which effectively makes both of us instantly freeze and from the way our wide eyes meet we both realize where we are and that people are watching us for their amusement. "I'm sorry" "It's fine. It stopped before it escalated so its fine … really its fine" I sputter out making Gale hesitantly nod before he deftly climbs off me and resituates into his spot beside me. My lips feel bruised and tingly from Gale's kiss, hell my neck has the tingly feeling as well from his sweet addictive touch. The silence that follows our short but passionate kisses isn't in the least awkward or uncomfortable but it seems to have an eerie sense of happiness that is tined with something dark and looming above us that can only be my upcoming death, "will he go back to loving Katniss when I'm dead?" I can't help but think and just when that thought comes to my head so does the icy ache of pain that covers my heart like a thick blanket threatening to suffocate it as more and more unpleasant thoughts that come to mind. Like if he still loves her now that we're … whatever we are. If he is past seeing me as the stupid spoiled mayors daughter or is just using me in here since it very well could be working in hos favor if her were to pretend to reciprocate my feelings. Just as my looming thoughts grab ahold of me and threaten to pull me down Gale dips down and presses a chaste but sweet kiss to my lips, lingering for a little while when its over then he pulls back and looks into my eyes "I'm sorry I was so awful to you back home … it was just easier to target my anger at you instead of actually trying to deal with the things I could actually chance. Its not that I got any type of satisfaction from seeing you get hurt by what I said its just … I don't know…" before he can finish I find myself blurting out "its fine it didn't really bother me. it was more of an annoyance that I had to deal with" I say giving him a pathetic attempt at a smile even though I know my words are lies, because every little thing he said to me hit me hard. I would take them all in and spend my nights crying myself to sleep wondering why I had to like the one person who seemed to hate me with a fiery passion.

Gale doesn't say anything back to me just lets out a low grunt then turns away from me, letting my heart fall as he does. I don't know how long I just stare at Gale's back or even why I do it all I know is that that feeling in the back of my mind is getting more heavy yet I still can't seem to figure out what it is or why its there.

I still can't seem to go back to sleep so I end up staying awake all night just staring at the back of Gale's head as my mind is plagued by what seems like a never-ending circle of thoughts so when morning rolls around and Gale is roused from his sleep I can only get up and help him check the snares since my eyes can't seem to stay closed for no more than a blink. My teeth chatter nosily as I follow behind Gale towards where Thresh and Rue set the snares. He seems to ignore me only giving me the one glance when I first started following him. Just by the way his shoulders I can tell he's annoyed with me even though I know for a fact I'm walking quieter than I normally do. I tighten my jacket around me only to realize I'm still wearing Thresh's jacket as well so I make sure to tighten that too, trying my hardest to not let the crisp morning air get to my skin as much as I can. I have to force myself to turn my gaze away from Gale and when I do I spot a bird flying by in the sky so immediately I rush towards Gale and yank an arrow from its quiver before doing the same with the bow which comes right off Gale's shoulder without a hitch. I spin on my heels then dart my eyes around until I spot the same bird now perched in a tree branch not too far away from us so without a thought and ignoring Gale's growl of "what the hell are you doing Undersee?" I take off at a quiet run keeping my eye locked on bird. I come to an abrupt stop when a hand grasps my shoulder stopping me, I glance back and see Gale looking at me like I'm mad. With a swift shrug of my shoulder I'm once again loose of Gale's clutches and running, it doesn't take long before I stop and notch the arrow and aim it at the bird then I let out a slow sigh. My fingers let the arrow go and it zooms unseeingly out of my sight and right into the birds neck making it float out of the tree dead. I swallow thickly then shakily shove the bow over my shoulder and head before running to retrieve our breakfast.

Since the bird wasn't too far from me in the first place it doesn't take me too long at all to get to it and when I do I swiftly snatch it up from the ground then turn and stop seeing a surprised looking Gale who quickly gives me a large smile, "Damn Undersee who knew you were such a good shot" he flirts giving me wink before we both let out a laugh. Gale eliminates the gap that was between us. He takes the dead bird from me then with deft fingers pulls the arrow free before wiping it onto the thigh of his cargo pants which makes me recoil slightly out of disgust until I remember that I myself, am probably coated with blood as well then I can't help but let out a small chuckle and this doesn't go unheard by Gale. He looks up at me as his hand freezes on its journey to put the bird into his backpack. His eyebrows class together as his eyes seem to search my eyes for something unknown to me, his stare doesn't waver and it starts making me feel nervous about what he's looking at but really its what he might see that really unnerves me. I quickly let out a fake cough and that seems to snap Gale out of whatever he was searching for or found, then he proceeds to put the bird into his backpack before he juts his head back where we came for and then he's walking back towards the snares and I'm following him like the lovesick puppy I probably seem like.


	18. Chapter 18 Announcements

*Author note- Sorry I didn't upload a chapter yesterday but it was my stepsisters graduation and such. Oh and sorry for the late update and short chapter I promise I'll make it up to you all with a longer chapter tomorrow :) Thank you for the views and reviews :) Please review, enjoy your read, and please forgive any errors I've missed. -007twihunger xoxo

**_Chapter Eighteen: Announcements_**

It doesn't take us too long before we're back where a few of the snares are set and nimbly undoing what animals we find in the snares then we quickly take them down all together before moving onto the next one. We do this for a while in comfortable silence when all of a sudden the sound of Claudius Templeton's voice is piercing the silence, "attention tributes, the regulations requiring a single victor have been suspended. From now on two victors may be crowned if both originate from the same district. This will be the only announcement." He says then his voice is gone and we're in silence once more. But this time its filled with the burning hope I feel in my chest, however I'm too scared to even think it's a possibility since it could very well jinx's any small ounce of hope I have going home. All at once my eyes meet Gale's 'did you hear what he said' I want to ask him but I can't find the courage to speak, it feels like I forgotten how to use communicate and all I can do is stare at him with wide eyes then before I can grasp what is happening Gale is racing towards me and instantly I'm in his arms and he's spinning me around and he laughs happily and I can't help but join in. My hands stay grasped tightly onto Gale's shoulders until he stops spinning me then awkwardly puts me down. His eyes meet the ground like its his favorite place to stare at as his hand rubs the back of his neck, I don't know when my legs start moving or what I think I'm going to accomplish by closing the small distance Gale put between us. But I do know is when his eyes glance up at me curiously I feel a spark of fight start to boil in my stomach telling me I can go home as long as I fight for it and that I'll actually be able to be with Gale, so without any thought at all I lean forward quickly and press my lips softly to Gale's but instantly snaps back from me and looks at me perplexed for a split second before a smile springs to his face but I can't help notice that it doesn't seem to reach his eyes but before I can really delve into this strange act Gale is back and his lips are on mine and even though there moving passionate against my own that same suspicious feeling is back but this time I feel like I can taste the reason on the tip of my tongue but my brain doesn't seem to be able to decipher what it is yet. When I realize that I'm not been kissing him back I quickly snap out of my thoughts and press my lips harder to his and enjoy the kiss knowing it is just one of the million I will thankfully get to share with the love of my life no that we both can live and with that thought an unpleasant gnawing in my stomach has me scared of what my mind isn't letting me figure out is wrong.

We break apart from our kiss when the need for air becomes too much and my lungs are burning. We're both panting loudly. Gale has a small smirk on his lips as I give him a somewhat forced smile before I walk back over to the snare I was working on before I continue with that task, so I'll have something preoccupying my mind instead of driving myself crazy with what I'm not capable of realizing is off yet. Even though my fingers work deftly on the cable of the snare making it look incredibly easy as they move, I'm actually having to step by step tell myself what to do next in my mind since it keeps trying to decipher what my body already somehow knows is off.

After we gather together our haul, Gale and I start walking back to our camp and our allies, neither one of us wanting to speak what we're both thinking. If Rue and Thresh will even want to still be our allies since they are a matching pair of tributes like us from the same district. "Will they ask us to leave or ask why we came back? Would they try to kill us?" I think but just as quickly as the thought came I banish it from my mind knowing that that wasn't possible and I silently curse myself for being so stupid. I've know little bird long enough that I know she doesn't have it in her to even attempt to hurt me just like how I couldn't hurt her and even though I might not have know Thresh that long but from the short amount of time I've spent with him I've come to think about him as a friend and it kind of seems like he has as well so I really don't think he would kill me either and the same goes for me and probably Gale as well. "Yeah, but you also thought that Gale would never like you and then you find out that he loves you" my subconscious snips making me swallow thickly as my eyes glance over at Gale who has his normal scowl on his face that makes me want to smile. "So what that's completely different things. Gale just let the divide between the seam and town deter his peruse of me but now when we go back to twelve everything will be great. Thresh and Rue are our friends and they would never try and hurt us … they can't … that's not the type of people they are" I reason, my eyes staring straight ahead but not really paying attention to anything besides my inner dispute. "Yeah keep telling yourself that as you continue to talk to yourself like a nut job. Don't be stupid how could Gale all of a sudden decide he's so in love with you when he was so in love with Katniss only days ago, think Madge. Use your god damn brain and stop letting your feelings in the way. As for Thresh and Rue they might be your friends but you also are their competition and one of the few people that stand in their way of getting home, back to all their friends and family. So why don't you think real hard and careful about all the things you know before you go and get us killed!" my subconscious snaps making me absentmindedly flinch and look down out of embarrassment of actually fighting with myself. "What the fuck is wrong with me" I think, my eyebrows furrow and my jaw clenches. My head feels like its spinning and my stomach is flopping with nerves, would Rue and Thresh really turn on me to get home? Would they…could they really kills us? Did Gale honestly love me or was I just some fun game for him to play with here in the games? Just as my mind is bombarded with way too many thoughts I stop in my tracks I finally grip what I had been dreading in the back of my mind and not even knowing it until know. I hadn't even known that I was suspicious of Gale's sudden change of heart by the happiness I felt that I actually had a chance with Gale Hawthorne, who cared how long I would have it until I died because it was there but now I'm not so sure of his feelings. Were they genuine? Did he really always like me form afar like he said and only settled with Katniss because he thought he couldn't have me? "You okay there Undersee?" Gale's gruff voice sounds from in front of me making me flinch and step back from him from being startled by his sudden appearance. "No he said he loves me" I think forcing the thoughts away even though I know its very possible. "Yeah I'm fine" I lie, giving him one of my famous smile that I know will look real. My head bobs up and down as I reach out and intertwine my hand with his taking note of the gentle smile he gives me and forcing myself from thinking whether its real or not.

Gale pulls me into step beside him, neither one of us talking. The wind rustles the leaves and bushes near us making me subconsciously step closer to Gale which makes his look down at me and when he does the soft expression he wears quickly morphs into the familiar scowl as his eyes dart down some then instantly he's dropping my hand and running hi through his hair before picking up his pace making me have to jog after him since his strides are much wider than my own. I want to ask him whats wrong but once again I can't seem to find my voice. My eyebrows furrow as I pick up my pace some more as Gale seems to do them same then we're walking through a small clearing and we're back at our camp and our allies who stare surprised at us. Before anyone can say anything Gale stomps over to Thresh and shoves him, knocking him off the fallen log he was sitting on, "Gale!" I screech running at him. I grasp his shoulders trying to pull him back as he shoves Thresh back down to the ground when he tries to get up again. I give his shoulder a quick yank and he just shoves me off making me stumble backwards and fall to the ground, as I'm falling to the ground my eyes catch sight of little bird perched up in a tree with wide fear filled eyes then my body is crashing hard into the ground and my hand is being sliced open even further as something jagged stabs into it and instantly I'm on red alert and my head is foggy because we're being attacked. As fast as I can I hastily get to my feet then run towards the guy attacking us. My arms encircle his waist as I slam into him from the side, taking us both to the ground in a tangle of arms and legs. Thankfully I land on top of the our attacker and quickly send my right fist into his face making it cock to the other side before hurriedly yank out one of my knives that I press to his throat, "Undersee! Madge! What the hell are you doing?" the guy from beneath me sputters, his voice laced with confusion and anger with a small tinge of fear. His words stop me from slicing the blade into his throat but I don't remove the blade from his throat or from how hard it is pressing into his throat threatening to slice his skin apart if he so much as tried to move away from me. My eyebrows pull together in confusion as my eyes search his face taking in his intense gray eyes, his hard yet striking features, and his unruly dark brown hair that hangs slightly in his face and yet I can't seem to figure out who he is or how he knows who I am. "How do you know my name?" I demand but he just stares at me like I'm crazy and the fear I seen in his eyes seems to bleed more out. From his lack of response I find myself getting angry and with this I press the blade harder into his throat making a small trail lf blood trickle down to his collarbone from the added pressure that slightly tears his skin apart. He lets out a whoosh of air as his eyes dart from one of my eyes to the other then he clenches his mouth shut before opening it again and stating "get a grip Undersee its me … its Gale … Gale Hawthorne, from back home" his words make me falter slightly and I know I must look confused as I stare at him intently but as I do his features start to come to view and its like I'm seeing him clearly and as I do I let out broken whimper a I see Gale laying underneath me with my knife to his throat and some of his blood leaking out from the wound I created. In an instant my hand drops the knife then I swiftly scurry back from Gale, my hands going up to cover my mouth as my body is riddled with self-disgust and fear of what I almost did of how I somehow couldn't register who Gale was … of how I'm one hundred percent no doubt crazy and from the watery glance I send to my allies they all know this as well.

My mouth open then closes a few times as I move my hands to fist into my jackets sleeves only to remember I'm still wearing Thresh's jacket as well. "I'm so sorry" I croak out before I shrug of Thresh's jacket then I turn and dart into the woods as my head is swimming fuzzily and my eyes try to blink away the tears that soon cascade down my cheeks. My feet are heavy against the hard earth beneath my feet making my feet hurt slightly from the sheer force of how hard they are slamming against the ground, however I ignore it and press myself to run faster not taking note of the way my lungs and throat burn from my excretion because the only thing I can seem to think about is that I need to get as far away from my allies before I do something horrible to them. I don't stop running until my aching legs stumble underneath me causing me to slam forward into the ground plaguing my vision with black dots and a muted switch to be flipped that seemed to take away my hearing as my hear starts to swim with dizziness. Eyes blink open and take in the trees and ground before everything goes black again. When my eyes open again I want to cry once more seeing Gale rushing towards me but that feeling doesn't last too long since in a matter of seconds everything is once again black. "Madge!" a slightly muffled voice shouts as I come back to consciousness then the next thing I know I'm staring at a very concerned looking Gale with Thresh and Rue behind him a bit, I sallow thickly shakily sitting up then swiping my arm across my mouth getting what ever is leaking from it onto my sleeve and not caring in the least what it is. Gale's eyebrows furrow then he hesitantly reach out and once he takes in I'm not going to run again he grasps my hand tightly in his own, so tightly that I wouldn't be able to run even if I wanted to. My head is void of any thought at all and I'm not too sure if that's because of how ward I feel or just because I'm almost positive I'm catatonic right now. "Hey shh its okay, it was an accident. Its okay Madge. I won't let you go to that place again okay … its just us. Gale and Madge and no one else, no one is going to try and hurt you ever again if I have anything to do about it. Your safe…" Gale states in a low rumbling voice that trails off at the end. His voice is filled with so much comfort that I feel like I want to cry until I taste the familiar saltiness of my tears that tells me I'm already crying. Gale tentatively reaches out with his free hand then wipes my tears away only for new tears to take their spot, then he pulls me into him quickly, hugging me in a way that made me feel like a small child and I couldn't fight past the damn of tears that seem to pour out of me more hastily as I return his hug.

We stay like that for a while just hugging each other fiercely as I sob into his shoulder until there's nothing left to cry then I just numbly hug myself to him, being selfish knowing I won't get anymore of his comforting words or for him caring about me since I just nearly killed him. A dry sob chokes in my throat making me move back from Gale as much as I can since he still isn't letting go of my hand, I roll my eyes then look over to our other allies and offer up as much of a real smile as I can. "Why don't we all continue our alliance until the next death then we go our separate ways hoping we won't have to see each other again" Gale puts forth, not even attempting to look back at our allies as he stares worriedly at me then reaches forward with his free hand and tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear then gives me a gentle smile that sparks a ember of warmth in my stomach that seems to slowly bleed out into my chest giving me hope that maybe there is still hope for me. "Okay, sounds good to us" Thresh answers making Gale nod curtly still not looking away from me, "us too" he replies. Slowly I stretch my body out as much as I can from my position on the ground, earning some cracks. "we should get started with breakfast then pack up and find a place to sleep tonight" Thresh puts forth causing Gale to finally glance over at him letting me get a small moment to quickly suck in a deep breath trying to steady myself as much as I can. Gale nods in agreement then stands up, pulling me up as he went since he still has my hand locked in his own making me feel a little embarrassed at the fact that he feels like he need to have a solid grip on me to make sure I don't run off but I guess that's totally my fault since I seem to keep doing it. My side aches with each and every breath I take making me subconsciously wince from the shooting pain.

As Gale pulls me along behind him towards our camp I can't help but look around with unseeing eyes not being able to think how pretty the shade of blue that the early morning is making the sky or taking in the many beautiful trees and flowers surrounding us, instead I can't help but think about if I somehow I manages to get out of here … if Gale somehow gets me out of here will is be able to get better and be the old me or will I stay this hollow shell of the girl I use to be. Just as the thoughts start piling up and becoming to much for me to take as well as leaving my head with even more of an ache I think about what Peeta once told me what feels like centuries but in reality I know its probably only a few weeks at tops. "Things might shape us into the people we are but we are the ones to choose who we are Madge never forget that." Just thinking about Peeta and hearing his voice playing in my head makes my chest constrict with pain as I let myself let out a shaky breath as I actually come to grips with how much I miss my best friend who I'm so use to seeing everyday, I ignore the side glance Gale sends me telling me he heard my exhale and honestly I could careless since he must now think I'm already crazy "might add on loud mouth breather to the mix anyhow" I think bitterly turning to scowl at the ground just as a cold breeze blows against the nape of my neck making me wrap my arms around myself and a subconscious step towards Gale and his body heat wanting to get rid of the cold chill that seems to chill me to bone.

In my head I absentmindedly think back of all the kills in the games and stop in my tracks pulling Gale to a stop too. Gale glances over his shoulder at me, confusion marring his handsome face. My eyes trail down his slightly dirty face that has beads of sweat lining his brows. My eyes trail down to his neck and I want to puke seeing the cut across his neck and collarbone. It may not be deep to the point of having pints of blood spilling out but that doesn't stop the fact that the collar of his jacket and shirt making them look damp, I have to swallow past the bile that rises up in my throat as my stomach turns in disgusted at what I did to the one guy I've ever loved romantically. Gale turns to look over my shoulder then I vaguely hear register him saying "you too head back to camp and start cooking or packing, which ever one you guys decide on. I have to have a little talk with Madge." However I don't hear anyone's response, I only see the backs of our allies walking away from us. Leaving us for whatever conversation Gale has prepared.

I can't help but feel relieved and glade that Gale doesn't talk right away, he waits until he can't see Thresh and Rue anymore before he turns to look at me and finally letting my hand go so he can stretch his as well as wipe the sweat off his hands onto his pant cladded thigh, never once taking his deep pools of gray away from me. His eyes seems to hold mine, not letting me look away even if I wanted to. "Whats wrong Madge?" Gale questions, I let a small breath pass through my slightly parted lips before licking them, I watch seeing as Gale's eyes trail down and watch my tongue wet my lips then he swallows and his Adams apple bob before he's looking back up into my eyes and I have to ignore the fact I know I'm blushing from the intense amount of heat radiating off me and especially off my face which causes Gale to smile. My eyes glance up to the sky since I can't seem to force myself to give him a force smile. The sky is lighter than it was but it is also a dark gray threatening to drench us with the large stormy gray clouds that look pregnant with rain. When I glance back down to Gale I take note of his eyes searching my face, "yeah" I croak, my own voice making me flinch back from how hollow and broken it sounds. I quickly avert my eyes then clear my throat, "I'm fine" I manage to get out after a moment before working up the courage to look back up at Gale who looks pissed off at me and at first I can't understand why until my subconscious pipes up and states "he knows your lying to his face" then I nod absentmindedly to myself letting a whoosh of air out then shaking my head as it fell downward so I don't have to look at him as I confide in him, "I don't think its possible for any of us to be okay after…" I find myself starting then trailing off as I realize what I'm doing and where I am and in an instant I want to scream and curse myself, hell maybe even kick at a tree or two. I was just freely with careful wording criticizing the capital and in the fucking hunger games of all places, "oh my god what will they do to me?" I think as I feel my breath become stuck in my throat as my eyes wide a fraction of a bit before I catch myself then quickly school my features as well as swallowing thickly and clearing my throat once again. "Did you ever think about what the capital could do to your dad or Haymitch? What about Peeta or anyone else your friendly with? President Snow might not be able to do too much in here besides killing you but he could make up some untrue reason to punish the ones you care about for the way you've been playing these games with the stupid heart of yours" my subconscious sneers at me making me feel even more sick than I already was. I feel a sweat start to pick up on the nape of my neck as well as on my hairline. My hands feel clammy and slightly sweaty as my throat feels as if it has dried up completely making me wish I was anywhere but here but just as I feel myself getting sucked into my self-loathing once more I'm pulled to the surface as Gale intertwines his hand with mine causing me to jerk my head up so I'm looking at him. He looks so much older than he did before we came to the games but I guess watching people die as well as killing them can add on a few quick years to anyone.

Gale lets out a low sigh taking the hint I'm through with talking so he hesitantly pulls me into step beside him before pulling me to a stop in a matter of second. My eyebrows pinch together in confusion, however I refuse to speak knowing I could further hurt the people I care about since Snow knows for a fact that I'm a selfless person and I've been like that even before I even knew I needed to hide that crucial trait from people who could use it against me and President Snow definitely registers at the top of people who could very well hurt everyone and anyone who I care about. "We're allies Madge … I … you can talk to me about anything at any time and I will listen, I promise. I know I haven't always been that standup guy you can tell everything to and depend on like that Mellark kid but I'm really trying here Madge just … just let me in, I know your hurting and I don't like it. If you keep everything bottled up like you are, your not talking to anyone but yourself then your going to make yourself go crazy. Just think about it okay" Gale puts forth in a hurry then he's once again pulling me it tow behind him, back towards our camp.


	19. Chapter 19 Little Bird Fly Away

*Author note- Sorry for the late upload guys had a busy day. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, please review, and forgive any errors I may have missed :) -007twihunger xoxo

**_Chapter Nineteen: Little Bird Fly Away_**

When we get back to camp I can't help but smile at seeing little bird make a silly face at Thresh, who is talking to her and when he sees her face he lets out a booming laugh that makes her giggle and before I know it her eyes are locked with mine and then she's on her feet and running towards me. When she reaches me she throws herself at me causing me to lose my balance and fall to the ground with her on top of me. I let out a bark of laughter before hugging Rue to myself then we pull apart and get to our feet, little bird grasps my hand in her much smaller hand not caring that I'm bleeding on her instead she gives me a warm smile before pulling me over to where Thresh is sitting.

Even though I don't hear Gale I know he's following us and I'm proven right when I turn and take a seat I see him a few feet behind us then he's sitting next to me scowling into the flames of the fire, the light from the flames seems to dace across his handsome face from the darkened woods around us threatening to drench us all without a seconds warning. I don't pay any attention of the light chitter and banter being thrown around between my allies as my gaze seems to come locked on the flames of the fire as it roasts our breakfast over it. I don't realize that I'm stuck in thought until a small hand is placed on my shoulder making fear strike in my gut until I the concern face from my little bird then her lips are moving and I can't hear her, I shake my head and swallow before returning my attention back to her "huh?" I whisper dumbly making her give me a sad smile. Rue looks over at Gale then back to me before giving me a more genuine smile, "I was asking if you wanted to come with me to fill the water bottles?" she repeats. It takes me a minute before I nod but after I do I quickly get to my feet but don't make a move to follow Rue since my hand is now grasped tightly in Gale's, I raise an eyebrow at him in question. Gale clears his throat awkwardly then lets my hand go before getting to his feet as well then I watch as he takes the quiver full of arrows off his shoulder as well as the bow then hands them to me. I hesitantly take them from him then stare confusedly at my hands that grasp the bow and quiver strap in them tightly "why are you giving these to me?" I question. Gale doesn't respond and for a few minutes I don't think he will so I nod to myself then turn but before I start walking off Gale's hand clasps my shoulder stopping me "you're a pretty good shot so it makes me more comfortable, if someone comes upon you while your away from me then at least you'll be able to protect yourself" Gale's states confidently, his voice caresses the back of my neck with the warmth of his breath making my knees tremble and want to give out from underneath me, however I quickly shake my head and the feeling from the front of my mind then stutter out "well now that that's done I … well I'll see you in a bit" before shrugging his hand of my shoulder gently then I'm walking towards where Rue waits near a large tree off to Thresh's left.

I take the three water bottles from Rue's small arms then tell her I'll carry them which makes her roll her eyes playfully at me before walking in step next to me. we walk like that until we near a small patch of some daisies that Rue immediately runs over to and snags them up before rushing back over to me where she slows her pace and begins weaving the flowers into a flower crown while I steer us clear of running into any trees as well as filing away the way we're walking so we don't get lost. Once we reach the small stream that seems as if its drying up while I let Rue sit next to me and continue weaving her flower crown. I finish collecting water into our water bottles as well as adding a few treatment drops to each bottle before just settling back in the grass staring up at the gloomy sky just letting myself relax for a few minutes or so. However just as my eyes flutter closed in relaxation the air is filled with the very familiar and heart dropping booming of a cannon which signals someone's death and in an instant I'm stumbling to my feet, before I'm able to successfully run back to camp to check on both Gale and Thresh Rue's small hands grasp my cheeks with her small hands making me look at her. "Madge their fine, it was probably one of the other tributes. Gale and Thresh are too stubborn to die" I want to laugh at her trying to cheer me up, I mean what is that about? I was the older one here. I was the one who was supposed to be comforting her not the other way around. I quickly push aside my thoughts and fear for Gale dissipate from my mind knowing that Rue was right, I frown then nod letting out a rushed exhale before licking my lips then retrieving our water bottles.

We start to walk back towards our camp leisurely before I stop causing Rue to stop with me, "whats wrong Madge?" her small voice pulls. I glance at her for half a second before licking my lips once more, "that mean cannon means that our alliance with you and Thresh is over … it means we're going to be splitting up" I make known, my voice cracking towards the end as sadness seeped up from my stomach. Rue's large eyes are full of tears in an instant and I can't blame her feeling my own eyes well up with unshed tears knowing when we get back to camp that Gale will make him and myself leave to find our own camp and I'm not ready to leave Rue, not yet. Not with all the things that could hurt her here like the mutts, the careers, going hungry. A gut churning of hope blooms in my stomach and starts to bleed out towards my chest as an idea comes to my head, I turn to Rue giving her a sly smile that oozes mischief I'm sure. "This is the hunger games, right?" I question her making her look at me in confusion like I might be loosing it again but then she just nods hesitantly before squeaking out a "yes." I smile even wider just thinking about my idea. My lip tears the split in it even more at my smile from stretching the skin, "well don't you think we should even that out? It isn't quit fair that the careers have food" I state in a knowing way making Rue look at me finally grasping what I'm saying then she's smiling as well and nodding her head hastily making me laugh then I tug at the hem of her jacket, pulling her behind me and away from the direction that will lead us back to our district partners.

My head sifts through different ways to diminish the careers food supply gravely like maybe somehow poison them with some nightlock berry juices, I remember seeing some in passing a few times. Halfway on our way towards the cornucopia I stop bringing Rue to a stop as well before I settle onto a decent side rock as I try to come up with a game plan for us to follow by. Then it hits me like a jab to the gut taking my air away with its contact. In order to go with the best plan I can think about I have to wiling to put both little bird and myself into the prospect of danger, willing to get hurt or even worse die just to try and attempt to take out their food supplies and give us all left a fighting chance against them. I clear my throat harshly, causing my throat to feel sore and yet I can't seem to bring myself to look at Rue as I speak, "I have an idea … its risky and we could get hurt or even worse. But if we do actually do it then we have a better chance to make it to the end, to go home…" I find myself trailing off at the end deciding maybe it is a bad idea, however the look of determination that takes over Rue's features makes me know she's in and it's a bittersweet feeling. "What's your idea Madge? I'm in." I swallow thickly then run bite hard at my cheek before letting out a low defeated breath before staring up at the sky "well we can make a few distraction fires to lead two of the careers away to investigate, most likely Cato and Clove since they're more blood hungry than Marvel so he'll probably volunteer to stay back at the camp to look after everything. You'll light the fires then as fast as you can make your way back to Gale and Thresh and I'll be right behind you after I set fire to their food" my words sound strong and confident event though my stomach is turning with the looming prospect of something going wrong.

We're quiet for a short while before Rue finally asks in a quiet voice, "what about that Marvel guy? He could hurt you" I glance over at her then give her a reassuring smile then shake my head even though I know she's right Marvel could very well hurt me he even said he would if he seen me again because this isn't the friendship games no this is the hunger games and its everyone out for themselves because only one person will go home … well now two so that leave three districts the chance to get both their tributes back. I shake my head, ridding myself from my haunting thoughts "Marvel and I have an understanding. He probably will help me start the fire before we go our separate ways" I state in a too confident voice making me want to be sick, "yeah that or kill you right after her helped destroy Clove and Cato's resources" my subconscious snips making the dread in the pit of my stomach boil over and rise so its spreading out into my chest leaving it heavy with that emotion. I'm snapped out of thought as Rue says "okay, sounds like a working plan. We just have to get the burn piles make and make sure they're big enough so they won't burn out when I take off to light the next one" she states making me smile at her in pride and nod. With that Rue and I quickly start piling up a large pile of moss, leaves, and twigs until we have a decent burning pile then we're off in search of where else to build the next burning pile with me on the way calling off distinct marking points that will easily lead Rue back to the first pile and then I'm doing the same with the second and third pile before pulling Rue into a tight hug, placing a kiss to her forehead before giving her a smile. "I'll see you before you know it" I reassure making her smile and nod in return before we give each other hesitant waves before making our own ways in different directions.

Its strangely easy for me to find my way back to the cornucopia that I want to laugh but don't from not wanting to give away our position from behind some bushes a good few yards away from the cornucopia and the three careers around it, talking about things we can't hear because of the distance between us. I can tell when they see the smoke because Clove starts walking towards the edge of the woods while she glances a few times back at Cato who is talking with Marvel then he nods and jogs after Clove and after a few seconds they're gone from sight. I wait a few extra seconds making sure they're actually gone before swallowing thickly then I hesitantly step out of the bushes I was hiding in and at a steady moderate pace walk towards the cornucopia and Marvel who is staring directly at me, his face is void of any emotion and I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not but I don't let that deter my pace instead with a large inhale I pick up my pace and start running towards Marvel wanting to get this discussion already over with so we can get whatever follows it over with, whether it be good or bad because either way I knew that food would be set ablaze I'm just not confident of who will be ding it in addition to who will be leaving this cornucopia and still be in the running for the victor.

When I'm only a yard or two away from Marvel he seems to snap out of his frozen state. I watch as he starts running towards me then slows his pace to hop about around the podiums then he's running again towards me. We both stop running, leaving a decent side gap inbetween us as we pant trying to catch our breath and as we do this our eyes never leave the each other. I almost want to let out a sigh of relief once Marvel breaks the silence, saying "are you fucking mad? What the hell are you doing here Madge? They could come back and find you!" his voice is laced with anger and I don't blame him, he told me clear as day that he would kill me if we saw each other … okay well he said if it was just the last two of us but I am risking it by doing this and talking to him because if Clove and Cato return before I'm gone then its both Marvel and my neck in the line. I hold my hand up making him stop a he opens his mouth to say some more then he rolls his eyes, "I have a plan to level out the playing field for the rest of us. We burn their resources then they'll have to rough it just like the rest of us … then we can go our separate ways" Marvel looks at me as if weighing the options in his head before he crosses his arms over his chest "no" he states evenly not missing a beat and causing me to recoil in surprise of his answer, I want to take a step or two a way from him to put an even bigger gap between us but its like my body is in shock and too unresponsive to move even as he takes a few steps towards me. "What?" I somehow manage to get out, my eyes no doubt as large as saucers. Marvel takes a few more feet then he's standing in front of me "lets take some of the stuff before we burn it … oh and we have to be fast. I don't want to be here when they come back" he adds on like an after thought before he turns and starts jogging back towards the cornucopia and the large pile of supplies calling over his shoulder "after you left the second time Cato had some tribute setup the bombs that are rigged to go off if you get off the platform before the gong sounds around the supplies so if anyone tried to steal them they would set off the bombs and kill themselves." I don't reply just jog after him making very sure I only stepped where he stepped when we got towards to the bombs.

Marvel tosses me a large black backpack and keeps one for himself and together we start piling things we will no doubt need then when we've packed them enough I watch as Marvel attempts to light a fire, this goes on for a short while before I catch myself glancing at the mound of dirt piles around the large pile of supplies then its like a smack in the face I realize what we could do. We could blow the food up. My head snaps to look at Marvel who is still trying to make a fire, "Marvel stop." I practically shout beaming with pride at my brilliant idea as my eyes sweep over the assortment of supplies before stopping on a large threaded bag of apples and at that moment I remember the bow "what, why?" Marvel rushes out his eyes large and searching no doubt for his former allies. "We need to get back so I can shoot the bag of apples … if I can manage to nick it just right then they'll tumble out and boom! No more food and supplies for Cato and Clove" I put forth my face not being able to contain the large smile at the prospect of maybe even getting the two tributes from two to think maybe that whoever was around the food surely died in the explosion letting us not get any target on our backs as well as maybe keeping us safe until later tonight when no one shows up in the sky besides the other tribute who died. Marvel drops the two stones he as then brushes the dirt and dried grass from his pants before looking at me intently, "are you positive you can do this Madge? I don't want us to walk all the way out over there and then have to come back here because you lost all your arrows. If that happens at the wrong moment we could be killed by Cato and Clove" he points out, wiping the sweat off his forehead. My eyes drift over to the bag of apples once again and I nod mutely before turning to look back at Marvel, "yes, I'll be able to shoot it" I say confidently even though there's a small ounce of doubt hanging over my head just like it does under any other type of situation like this or even just being around the capital guests back home in twelve.

Without another word Marvel gives me a curt nod before turning around and running for the tree line with his backpack high on his shoulders making me let out a whoosh of air before I run after him holding tight to the straps of my backpack trying to run as fast as I can, wanting to hurry and get this over with. It doesn't take us too long to get a good amount of distance form the cornucopia, but we're still a good distance away from the woods as well. I glance behind me and take that Marvel stands a good distance behind me more towards the woods than I do and I can't blame him, with a shaky exhale I drop my backpack down to my side so it rest pretty close to my boots. Before I know it my fingers are notching the first arrow and I can feel a sweat start to breakout on the back of my neck from the tremendous pressure I feel to get it on the first chance. "Come on Madge you got this" I think closing my eyes slightly until my breathing is even again and only then do I open my eyes.

My eyes are trained on the bag of apples then without any more wasting time I let the arrow go and immediately I'm holding my breath as the first arrow barely even nicks the bag of apples making me let out angry groan, "I thought you said you could do it?" Marvel points out from behind me making me grit my teeth so I'm not yelling at him from being angry at myself for letting my nerves get the better of me and making me miss the damn bag. "I'm nervous enough without you criticizing me" I snap not being able to hold my tongue but thankfully after that he doesn't respond just stays quiet behind me and I couldn't be anymore grateful than I am now. My hand reaches back and with draws another arrow from the quiver then notch it just like the first one, but this time is different then last time. This time I force myself to clear my mind and focus solely on the bag of apples making damn sure this time I'll hit my target and when I finally let the arrow release I can't help but breath "yes!" as the arrow zips right into the bag tearing a small hole in it but its not enough, however I'm happy because at least this is a step closer to my goal than I was only seconds ago. Without a thought in my mind I reach back and pull another arrow free then notch it with deft fingers, my eyes never leaving my target. I close my eyes then say a silent prayer before once again opening my eyes and letting the arrow loose to fly through the air and hit the bag of apples again. Its like it happens in slow-motion. First its just the tear and I'm holding my breath praying that it's a big enough rip that at least a few apples will tumble out and set the bombs off. First one then another and then all of the apples seems to spill out of the bag and bounce from things until they hit the ground and before I can rejoice in my happiness the bombs go off one right after the next and I'm thrown back from the loud explosions, slamming into a near by tree that makes me have to struggle for air as well as grit my teeth from the worsen throbbing in my right ribs that tells me somethings broken. My left ear rings as my right ear is completely muted to the world, I stare at my handy work from the ground not being able to pull myself up into a standing position since my head is filled with dizziness.

Even though I can't really breath and I'm almost positive I'm deaf in my right ear I can't help but smiling as my eyes take in the scattered chunks of the supplies all scorched and destroyed beyond use but before I can actually celebrate this victory I see both Cato and Clove run out of the woods and towards their destroyed supplies. I watch in a daze as Cato yells at Clove then they start trying to scrounge for any useable supplies but I know they won't come up with anything or at least not enough to be in an advantage to anyone else. I roll over wincing as I roll over my side and my ribs throb in protest making me grit my teeth and quickly stumble to my feet before I stumble over to the tree line of the woods making sure I gather all my stuff not letting myself forget anything but also making sure I get hidden before I'm discovered.

I don't know how long I just sit in the near by bush but I know its not long enough to get me caught just long enough to be able to breath correctly once again then I'm making a quick glance around trying to find Marvel but when I don't find him I immediately know he has already took off and then I'm turning and running as fast as my throbbing side permits me and that's not that fast more of a casual jog, slightly stumbling everyone in a while since I'm still pretty dizzy and my legs feel like Jell-O yet I don't falter in my running since I know that could very well be the difference between life and death.

After a while of running my legs seem to get more sturdy and the stumbling stops, however a few minutes later I stop running since my side is screaming in protest as if one of my ribs have punctured through the side as well as my lungs burning. I make myself keep up a decent speed walk not letting myself slow down since I need to get back to my allies so I'm no doubt safe for however long that may be. Not too soon later I find myself at a slow leisurely walk since my side is throbbing so bad until the quietness around me is interrupted by a sharp shrill scream and this one scream I feel sick to my stomach and my heart swiftly plummet into my stomach making me want to cry, cameras be damned. I push myself to run as fast as I can with one thought in my mind "I need to find and protect Rue."

My feet slam heavily against the earth, propelling me forward as fast as my body will let me not willing to let anything happen to my ally, especially when I can have something to do with it. Without thinking and only trying to comfort Rue as much as I can form my distance from her I shout "Rue! I'm coming. Hold on, I'm coming!" my throat hurts from my shouts and I know someone can here me but I don't care. I crash through some bushes then a sob chokes in my throat at seeing a frightened Rue lying on the ground with a large net over her keeping her prisoner. I press myself to sprint across the short distance then pull out one of my knifes and quickly start hacking at the rope wanting to get little bird free as soon as I can. My heart leaps into my throat with happiness as the rope snaps then Rue and I as hastily yanking the net off her but my happiness is short lived when a large spear stabs through my ally. On instinct I spin around then pull out my bow and an arrow then with deft fingers I'm letting the arrow go, only for it to embed itself into our attackers chest. A sob sounds in my throat as I stare wide eyes at Marvel who stands before me with my arrow protruding from his chest, his eyes are wide and tear rimmed. His hands hold onto the arrow in his chest as his eyes glance down then he looks back up at me "I didn't know" he breaths out before falling to the ground. My heart feels numb and I'm more scared than I knew I could be, I just killed my friend.

"Madge" Rue's broken voice says and in a instance I'm turning back around and falling to my knees as I see the large spear lodged in the middle of little birds stomach making a sob be strangled in my throat. My eyes burn with tears and I feel like I cant breath. My eyes search her tear stained face then before I know it I'm crawling hastily over to her, not caring that ricks dig ungodly harshly into my knees because I need to get to Rue. If I can just get to her then I can save her. Tear's are openly steaming down my face and I can't bring myself to care because the only thing I can comprehend it that Rue is hurt and I need to help her.

I pull Rue's head onto my lap as my tears start to fall harder and sobs are wracking my body ungodly. "Your okay" I whisper a few times before my eyes lock on Rue's big brown tear filled eyes that make my heart crack but I ignore it as much as I can and instead run my fingers through her hair trying to comfort her as much as I can knowing that there's no way to save her especially form the large amount of blood seeping out of her small body. "Did you burn the food up?" she whispered making a sob choke in my throat making it feel even more hoarse than it already is feeling, I blink back tears and atempt to giver her the most genuine smile as I can "every last bit of it," I say. She smiles at me faintly before saying "you have to win." I nod as my tears start streaming down my cheeks again, "I'm going to. I'm going to win for the both of us now," I find myself promising, our eyes staying locked, both filled with tears and I know neither one of us could stop it even if we wanted to. I hear a cannon and I instantly know it belonged to Marvel and that seems to add on to the guilt and pain I feel fill out my chest. "Don't go. Don't leave me Madge." Rue says, tightening her grip on my hand making a pang of pain strike throughout my heart. "I'm not going anywhere. I'm not leaving you" I promise trying to hold my tears back trying to be strong for her. I move closer to her, settling her head more comfortably in my lap as I sit on the ground. My fingers tremble as I brush her hair back away form her face "sing," she says in a small airy voice, her eyes looking up into mind pleadingly. My heart constricts painfully and I can't help but find myself nodding, sing? Sing what? I only know a handful of songs with lyrics while the rest are only melodies and such.

I can't seem to think about any other song than the one my mother use to sing to me every night until she stopped putting me to bed all together. My throat is hoarse from tears and fatigue not to mention thick with emotion. I cough then clear my throat then sing as I some time found myself doing for my mother when she was in one of her medical induced naps.

Deep in the meadow, under the willow A bed of grass, a soft green pillow. Lay down your sleepy head, and close your sleepy eyes And when again they open, The sun will rise. Here it's safe, here it's warm Here the daisies guard you from every harm Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true Here is the place where I love you.

Rue's eyes flutter closed and I have to swallow down a sob. Her chest is starting to take shallower and shallower breaths, only slightly even moving until its not moving at all. As I stare at her I can't even try to contain my cries because the damn breaks and tears flood down my cheeks and makes my voice heavy with emotion as I continue the song, the song I have to finish for her.

Deep in the meadow, hidden far away A cloak of leaves, a moonbeam ray Forget your woes and let your troubles lay And when again it's morning, they'll wash away. Here it's safe, here it's warm Here the daisies guard you from every harm.

As I come to the ending of the song my voice is barely audible but that doesn't stop the sobs from wracking throughout my body.

Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true Here is the place where I love you.

Everything is too still and quiet. Then almost eerily the mockingjays around us take up my song and start singing it back to me making my pain seem to intensify. I can't help but watch as my tears trickle down from my face then down Rue's. Then I lean forward and press a kiss to her forehead holding back a sob before pressing my three fingers of my right hand to my lips then rise them to the sky and whimper out "I'm so sorry Rue … Rive. I'm so sorry." I release my hold on little bird knowing they will want me to clear out to collect her body but as I stand up and take a look at her small bloody small body I can't leave her, not now. Not like this. I let out a small whimper as my blurry tear rimmed eyes look around myself until I see a few different kinds of flowers that I hastily start snatching from the ground and start placing around Rue's small still form as well as the hole in her small chest after I remove the large spear form it. With another so I stand staring at my ally then glance over at Marvel not being able to stop myself from saying "I'm so sorry Marvel" then I'm over came with sobs again, that make me lower myself to the ground. Pulling myself into a tight ball until my tears are all but used up then I slowly make my way back up to my feet before collecting my stuff then I'm slowly making myself into the woods trying my best to ignore the cannon booming announcing Rue's death to everyone else.

I don't know how long I let myself walk aimlessly through the woods before letting out a pained shriek then I'm looking around and making my way towards where I think Gale might be.

I let loose a loud frightened shriek as someone grabs my shoulders and pulls me to a stop only to swallow the shriek when I see its only Gale. He looks at me with s mixture of relief and confusion with a worried looking Thresh who looks around no doubt for little bird and I can't help but let loose a sob as I let my body fall to the ground but before I hit the ground Gale's strong arms encircle my waist, pulling me close to his sturdy chest an my sobs over whelm my body with vicious wracks as my heart seems to re-break with every and any thought about my small bird like ally. I sob loudly not caring in the least if Cato or Clove finds us, only wanting the pain in my chest I feel with the death of my little bird to go away but knowing it will never fully go away, I will always have a part of me constantly morning both River and Rue. Through my sobs I hear Thresh say "where's Rue?" and this only makes my sobs become harder until I can manage to sob out "he … he … he killed her … her killed her and … and I killed him" before im overwhelmed with more body wracking sobs as I hug myself tightly to Gale wanting nothing more than him to hold me and tell me everything will get better. That everything is okay but the sane part of me tells me that's irrational and that no matter how much he comforts me I don't think I'll be just able to get over it as if it were just a switch needing to be switched.

I vaguely hear Gale say something to Thresh even though I'm not sure what it is and I'm almost positive that Thresh replies in a voice unheard to me form my gut-wrenching sobs. After a while my sobs die down and my tears dry up and still my chest is raw and pain filled telling me I'll never really be able to get rid of the pain of seeing two people I love and care about die in font of my own eyes.

When I can muster up the strength to pull away from Gale I do, and I see a pain stricken Thresh who I stare at numbly "I'm really sorry" I start before stopping having to suck in a breath of clean air to clear my head of thoughts before continuing on, "I tried to save her, I really did. I was just too late. I was too late to save her but I killed him … I killed him for her." Thresh looks at me brokenly then nods before pulling me into a bone crunching hug that makes Gale stiffen then take a step towards us but he stops when I give him a stern look that makes him avoid my gaze, a sheepish expression taking refuge on his face. I hug Thresh back and we stay like that for a moment or two before we pull back from each other then he looks at Gale "good luck … Madge, Gale. I hope for the best for you two and I hope we don't run into each other again" Thresh puts forth, before turning around and running into the woods but before he actually reaches the tree line I shove myself away from Gale and shout "Thresh wait" which makes him stop then hesitantly turn back to look at me sadly and before either him or Gale can get anything out I rush towards him and quickly yank my backpack off my back and shove it at him "its food … keep safe okay Thresh" I choke out forcing myself to stop the sob that threatens to climb up my throat and fill the air around me. Thresh looks at me for a second as if not knowing how to react to my kindness, of me giving him all the food I have even though it could help Gale and me. He shakes his head then pulls me in for another tight bear hug then he presses a kiss to the top of my hair before whispering "I really wish I would have met you two outside of these game then with a forced pained smile he turns and runs off into the woods and disapears from my sight.

After a little while Gale walks up to me then pulls me with him gently in the opposite direction that Thresh went and I can only think "I hope Gale and I win" because now I have to win with Gale since I promised Rue I would win for her and I've never broke my promise and I'm not about to start now.


	20. Chapter 20 Unseen Attack

**_*Author note- Sorry for the long over due wait but life got really hectic and grasped my attention for the few long past weeks and once again I apologize sincerely. I hope you all continue to read my little fanfiction and that you enjoy it. Thanks for your time. Please enjoy, review, and please forgive any and all error's I might have missed. - 007twihunger xoxo_**

**_*P.S.- Sorry that its not too long, will try and do more next chapter here in a few days. I hope you guys didn't give up on my story just yet._**

**_Chapter Twenty: Unseen attack_**

Gale easily leads me back to our camp and immediately we're both gathering up all of our things we will need before my hand is intertwined in Gale's much larger hand and we're on our way once again, looking for a safe place to stay for the night even though we both know Thresh wouldn't come back and try to hurt or kill either of us. We walk in a strained uncomfortable silence neither one of us being able to speak to break the tension that seems to swirl around us like the hot muggy air. I know he doesn't know what to say to me to try and comfort me from the death of Rue and I'm grateful for it. I don't need a reminder about the little girl who I easily came to think of as my little sister and now she's gone all because of me. I should have started that fire then have taken not just Marvel down with me but myself included, if I wasn't around pulling misfortune towards not just myself but my allies as well like some type of horrific magnet then maybe just maybe little bird would still be alive. "Yeah but for how long?" my subconscious pulls making my stomach turn in disgust yet still it doesn't seem to be able to lift the veil of numbness and depression that seems to latch onto my as if it was a bubble, a bubble of constant reminders of what I'm becoming in here and of what I've done to countless people, my allies included. I look up at the sky just as a drop of water splatters against my cheek making me think at first I'm crying again but then another and another droplets of rain fall from the sky proving my first thought wrong. I try and fix my eyes on anything at all not wanting to be dragged back into my thoughts about Rue or anyone else I love that is dead or any of the innocent people I've killed but that's proving harder said than done.

Before I know if we're coming to a stop then Gale is helping me into a tree and telling me to take a look around, so I do. With deft movements and positioning of both my hands and feet I quickly make my way further up in the tree until I have a good enough view. My eyes sweep over our close surrounding area silently reveling in the lack of danger around us. I can't help but let a small smile grace my face as I begin my descend of the tree as fast as I can since I really want to tell Gale about my findings but yet I'm too frighten if I holler down to him then there's a small chance that someone or something will hear me and I'm not willing to gamble on that right now let alone with Gale's life being dangled in front of me. I refuse to be any amount of accessory to his demise if it comes and with the amount of faith in Gale I know he won't die here, not while either of us have something to do about it.

I make it back down to the ground with ease then stumble backwards and almost fall but luckily Gale's able to grab me by my shoulder to stop me, "it looks clear" I force out as I see Gale's furrow and his steel gray eyes narrow at me, waiting for me to tell him my findings. Gale lets out a whose of air then nods his head, then before I know it he's walking away from me and starts pacing "we need to find a much better hiding place for the night since its just the five of us" Gale states, not even giving me a glance as he continues to pace. My head jerks up to Gale's face at the word 'five' not being to really grasp that I made it to the final five and so has Gale, not to mention that we're both going to go home. "Gale it's the final five" I practically shout then immediately wince and clap a hand over my mouth out of embarrassment and anger of maybe giving us away to something near us that I missed seeing from up in the tree. Gale gives me a stern glare before he registers what I just said then he gives me a bewildered smile, "we made it almost to the end Madge!" he states rushing towards me and picking me up then spinning me around holding me up into the air, causing me to laugh and for him to join in shortly. Only when Gale gets dizzy does he stop spinning then puts me down but even that can't stop the large grins we have or the way he seems to be looking at me like it's the first time he's seen me, which causes confusion to bubble up inside me but before I can delve into this look Gale speaks again, "this means there going to be interviewing my family … I mean our families." His slip up reminds me that the only people I have left that I consider family are my father, Haymitch, and Peeta since my mothers now dead, with that reminder I remember the note Finnick Odair himself sent me even though he could very well be punished. "He chose to warn me of what happened which must mean that … that my mothers death wasn't an accident and that President Snow ordered it … but if Snow did that to me what will he do to one of his precious victors like Finnick who gave me the news when no ones really allowed to talk between districts most importantly not in the hunger games especially between a victor and tribute from another district." I think, finding if very hard to swallow past the large lump that now resides in my throat as a cold chill runs through my body.

My eyes glance over at Gale and I can see his mouth mothing and he looks happy so I already know he's talking about his family or Katniss since he looks so happy but then again I really don't know since I can't seem to make my mind register what he's saying. All my mind is capable of doing right now is thinking about ways  
President Snow can hurt Finnick since he's already killed Finnick's father when he tried to turn down the new things expected of him. Now his mother and two brother's hate him thinking that he's changed into some capital hungry womanizer but that doesn't stop them from taking the money he sends them each month. "So only his family and … and Annie Crest stand in the running of important people that they could use to hurt him" I think, my stomach turning thinking about the sweet redheaded girl with the freckles dusted across her nose, the one who is already barely hanging in there from what the capital and President Snow has put her through. "Please let it be one of his family members" I think not being able to think about anyone hurting poor weak Annie anymore than she already is. I feel bad about hoping its one of Finnick's family but I would rather it be someone I've barely seen on TV years ago then the girl who is so fragile and that I know personally. I'm brought back to the present and out of my thoughts when Gale sets a heavy hand on my shoulder then looking at me calculatedly, "you okay Madge?" he questions, actually sounding genuinely concern and with just that one gesture from him it seems to wipe away any doubt I had about Gale's intentions and feelings towards me. "No one would be that cruel to someone." I think, managing to give him a weak smile. "Yeah I'm fine, just thinking about who they'll interview for me sorry" I put forth somehow even managing to get a blush to tint my cheeks. Gale gives me a smile then settles down onto the ground before handing me some beef jerky, which he pulls out of his pocket. "Thanks" I reply before settling on the ground next to him then I slowly start eating on the strip of beef jerky.

"So did you figure out who they'll interview" Gale teases, knocking his shoulder against mine gently as he gives me a playful wink making me wish we could have at least gotten to know each other outside of these games but that's nothing either of us can change now. I nod once then finish chewing my bite and swallow, "my dad, probably Peeta, Delly … Kat… I mean Darrius, and probably Peeta's brother's. I don't have much friends back home being the mayors daughter and all" I put forth with a shrug of my shoulders as if it didn't bother me or even hurt that no one wanted to get me all because of what they thought about my father and that I'm practically a capital citizen from my fathers rank in work. I try my best to ignore the jolt of pain through my stomach at the almost slip up on the girl who up until a few weeks ago I had thought was my friend. Hell Katniss use to come over and do homework at my house sometimes and then poof I'm not even a blimp on her raider anymore. My eyes cast downward as my stomach turns in disgust and I know I can't stomach anymore food so I quickly stuff the rest of my beef jerky into the pocket of my jacket before plastering on a fake smile and looking back up at Gale, "What about you? Who do all think they'll interview? From what I remember you were pretty friendly with all the girls" my words makes Gale chuckle then shake his head "are you jealous Madge?" I give him a stern glare as I shake my head fervently, making some of my loose blond curls swish around my face and shoulders and making Gale's smile widen as he starts to laugh some more. I can feel how hot my face is and I can only guess it's the shade of a tomato. Gale moves closer to me but I scoot away from him trying to hide my blush, he swiftly gets up and sits on the other side of me and smile triumphantly at my red face making me even more mad at him "jerk" I mumble as he continues to laugh at my expense. When Gale's laughter finally comes to an end he gives me a shy smile as he tries to avert my eyes but with no avail since he keeps glancing up at me, "I'm not like what the rumors insinuate. Sure I've taken girls to the slag heap or behind the school and kissed them but … but I've never done that…" Gale puts forth before trailing off. I look up at him with narrowed eyes "I've over hear a lot of girls talking about how great you are Gale … it doesn't matter if it makes me mad its stuff you did before we … before we got to wherever we are now. You don't need to lie" I get out, just barely containing the anger and hurt I feel from him lying right to my face.

In a flash Gale gets to his feet then stalks off angrily from me but not before he gives me a heated glare that leaves me rooted to my spot from the hate and anger filled in it that he use to give me back in district twelve. "Just because you hear things it doesn't mean there real, I though you of all people would understand that Undersee! I may not be the nicest person back in twelve but my mother and father sure as hell taught me better than sleeping around. I'm not stupid, I know that if you can't keep them then don't loose yourself in a heated minute of passion. I know better then adding another mouth to my family as well as another name…" he trails off then clenches his fists and stalks a little further away form me, and I let him knowing he needs to cool down. "Great going Madge" I think letting out an annoyed sight before dropping my head into my hands, a crunch from in front of me has me jerking my head up and they widen as large as saucers at seeing a large pink bird, the same kind of pink bird that killed both my aunt May and my ally Avery and yet I can't move as we stare at each other. I want to call out to Gale but then there's the chance of him getting hurt along with me, might as well contain the casualties of this attack.

In an instant another crunch is hear. In an instant I'm flying off the ground and getting to my feet. In an instant Gale walks back through the trees with his head dipped and shoulders slumped in defeat then he's looking up at me with a sincere look of remorse plastered on his face. In an instance both the mutt and my eyes are locked on Gale. In an instant the air is pierced with a loud heart dropping screech. In an instance the mutt is speeding towards Gale and I can't move. In an instance Gale is on the ground trashing and grunting trying to fight off the mutt as I stand by idly watching in horror as the mutt occasionally pierces Gale's skin making blood appear. A lot of things can happen in an instance.

It's like the haze that is over me immediately dissipates when I hear a Gale scream out "Madge!" that one scream and I'm rushing forward towards Gale, somehow without really paying attention to anything besides watching Gale I manage to get a knife in each of my hands. I reach Gale just as the pink bird skews its large beak through Gale's calf making him curse out loud. My eyes are blurred by tears but it doesn't stop me from launching myself at the mutt, making us hit the ground hard then we're both trying to get the upper hand but thankfully I'm the one that comes out on top. I slash the knives frantically at the mutt not caring as I occasionally get nicked here and there. It seems like the fight between the mutt and myself lasts forever yet ends so quickly. My face, hands, and upper torso feel caked with blood yet I can't bring myself to care because all I can think about is Gale. When I'm sure that the mutt is dead I stumble to my feet, falling twice before I'm able to make my way over to my ally. Gale is frantically trying to tie his jacket around the large slice on his leg but his hands are shaking so much and are so bloody that he's not managing much at all. With deft fingers I snatch the two ends of his jacket from him then swiftly tie it together tightly only mumbling out a weak hoarse "sorry" when Gale hisses out in pain from the tightness of the jacket against his wound. When I'm sure his leg is bound tightly I swiftly help him up to his feet only having to take two tries since the first try I fall to the ground with him, not expecting his heavy weight.

I manage to get Gale over to a large tree which he leans against as I collect our things then I strap both backpacks to myself, one to my front while the other rests on my back with the bow and quiver sitting on top of it, then I'm helping Gale lean on me. My eyes sweep around making sure I don't over look any water near us. The further we walk the harder it gets to carry Gale's extra weight but I grit my teeth and make sure my grip on him is tight. After a while we pass a stream and what was once a decent size pond, that has now dried up. "Bastards" I think as I force myself to keep moving forward, "we're almost there" I tell Gale, even though I'm not sure why I'm saying it. I guess a side of me wants to keep both of us hopeful that we'll come across some water and a decent hiding spot before we're attacked once again.

Sooner than I expect yet longer than I hoped we find a well hidden cave, that I could easily hide us even further by placing rocks into the opening to the cave. Gale helps me place him down near the entrance of the cave while I swiftly clamber into it and search around for any hidden tributes or mutt but thankfully come up empty on my search. When I walk out of the cave and back to Gale I almost want to let a cry of relief let loose from my lips as I see the near by stream that will keep us well hydrated while we're here, my eyes quickly dart away from the water and down towards where I hurriedly start taking off our backpacks, the bow, and quiver before I dig though our bags and retrieve the two water bottles we have then I'm running towards the streams with the water bottles securely trapped between my arms and my chest. It doesn't take me too long at all to fill our water bottles but waiting for it to be clean sure seems to be taking forever, so I quickly busy myself by going over to Gale, who looks remarkably pale and slightly green. His head is lulled on his right shoulder and then I take in the fact that he moved from in front of the cave all the way to the edge of the stream where his leg is dipped in, "Gale!" I screech, dropping everything I'm holding before I hightail it over to my ally and begin to start pulling his heavy frame away from the water as much as I can which isn't much since he's trying to shrug me off, "Stop! Fuck Undersee, it burns I'm just trying to sooth the pain" Gale grits out, then I swear I hear him mumble under his breath "Katniss would do the same." My heart feel a sharp prick as I glare at Gale. I let go of him and instead of trying to pull him away from the water, I give him a shove towards the water. "Fine get yourself infected and die Gale!" I shout at him. I don't even give him a second look before I turn angrily on my heels and storm back over to where I dropped the water bottles, which I retrieve then make my way back over to our supplies that sits on the ground in front of the cave entrance.

My hands shake slightly as I starts searching our backpacks to retrieve the few bits of wire we have then I'm stuffing it into the pocket of my jacket, not caring the one of the knifes hiding in it cuts my finger a little, instead I quickly gather our things then place them inside the cave. My heart hurts from Gale's words. Was he always going to compare me to Katniss? Why was he even doing it in the first if he chose me? "Stop being melodramatic, she's his best friend. You as well as everybody back in twelve knows that he loved Katniss so just shut up and stop with all this schoolgirl jealousy shit and get your mind back on the prize!" my subconscious snaps at me, making me unintentionally wince from the harshness of my own thought, but I know its right … I'm right and I need to stay focused on the game instead of trying to analyze everything Gale says and does. I let out a groan of frustration then clench and unclench my hands. I wait until I've calmed down some then I gently set the water bottles near the tree that Gale was first leaning against when we got here, I turn around and walk at a moderate pace over to Gale who has a sullen expression on his face but I take note of the fact that his leg is away from the water and is instead laying straight out on the grass, dripping water from his soaked pants. We don't say anything to each other as I reach him, I hold my hands out which he hesitantly takes in his own and helps me get him to his feet all the while he tries to suppress the pain but I see the tension in his jaw from how hard he's clenching his teeth. The whole walk back over to where I laid out the water bottles is in an uncomfortable silence that feels like it could be cut with a butter knife and I know its my fault. Gale's always been a hot head but that's not an excuse I can use, especially with how I was raised and I feel ashamed with how these games have change me, "but no more" I think determinedly as I help Gale to the ground slowly then gently I take the seat next to him. "Listen I'm sorry, I shouldn't have yelled at you" I put forth before stopping to release a low whoosh of air as I divert my eyes from Gale's piercing gray ones so I'm now looking at my hands as I wring my fingers in my lap. "I'm just … its hard in here. I feel like I can't remember who I was before … anyway" I say clearing my throat awkwardly then I rub at my sticky sweat ridden neck before I glance back up at Gale, "I'll try to stop myself from snapping at you, but you have to trust me Gale … we're all we got in here and I am really just wanting to help you … I've always just been trying to help you in here" I say, my voice losing volume towards the end until its barely audible. Gale looks at me calculative then nods and forces a weak apologetic smile, "I'm sorry too Madge, we both got a little out of hand back there. I'll try my hardest to stop being a stubborn jackass but I can't promise much after all it is my trade mark" he puts forth, giving me a playful wink and his famous smirk that makes me roll my eyes and suppress a laugh but I can't do anything about the smile on my face.

"We should take a look at the damage done before … we set up some traps and such" I say, almost slipping up and saying 'I' instead of we, and if I would have let it slip then we would be in no doubt another fight probably about how he doesn't want to be dead weight in this alliance. Gale nods hesitantly as he stairs deeply into my eyes, and for a moment I catch myself getting lost in them that I accidently press down too hard on his injured calf, making him hiss out in pain behind clenched teeth as he tried to pull his injured leg away from me, "sorry" I mumble embarrassed, my cheeks feel like they're on fire from my embarrassment. I divert my eyes from Gale's then begin to pull his leg out so its straight and pointed towards me again, but before I start untying his jacket to look at the damage intently I remember we might possibly have medicine that could help, from one of the many times I've been hurt while in the games. "One second" I rush out then even faster I get to my feet and run into the cave to check our backpacks for some kind of medicine to apply to Gale's wound. Once I'm in the cave and close enough to the backpack I drop to my knees roughly on the ground, then I'm fiercely digging through the backpacks until I'm almost to the bottom of the second one and just as I'm about to find a camera and start yelling at Haymitch to get Gale some medicine when my fingers hit a hard tin container that makes my stomach do a happy flip. As quickly as I can I jerk the container free from the backpack then I'm running as fast as I can back towards Gale.

I swiftly yet gently unwrap Gale's jacket from around his leg and the first thing I see is all the blood, which makes my stomach turn disgustedly. I fumble opening the medicine container but when I finally do manage to open it I see that there's only a little bit of medicine in it and its for burns, my heart plummets in my chest. I let myself be consumed by sadness and even anger, that all the medicine was wasted on me. Slowly I set the container with the burn medicine in it, onto my lap before I jerk the lid off one of the bottle of waters then I'm hastily dumping the clean water onto his wound. The blood slowly trickles away until his leg is visible through the now clear water, and by no means is the cut on his leg little or shallow. No this cut is long and deep, so deep I can see a part of Gale's leg from the large gash across his calf. My hands shake as I quickly turn away from the sight and begin to gather up a glob of the burn medicine. I let out a shallow breath then swallowed past the sick churning of my stomach and turned back to work on Gale's leg. I sloppily apply the medicine to the gash on his leg with my trembling fingers, trying to ignore the feeling of his bone against the tip of my fingers making me want to puke. My ears perk and stay in tune with our surroundings, making sure nothing and no one gets the jump on us while we're distracted with Gale's injury predicament.

After applying all the burn medicine I can to Gale's gash I quickly bind it with some gauze then I walk the short distance over towards the stream where I stare shakily washing my hands, while my eyes dart around in search for any nearby cameras. My heart swells with hope as I see a camera perched near me, so as casually as I can I get to my feet then absentmindedly dry my wet hands onto my pant cladded thighs before leisurely walking towards the camera. As if I were merely thinking about what to do next. Once I'm close enough near the camera, that I'm sure Haymitch along with everyone else will see my plea. "Haymitch he needs medicine. Please … please I don't know how long he'll last with that cut, its too deep to heal without medicine." I get out in a voice barely audible voice. My mind instantly goes over the very real plausible outcome of Gale's injury. The games could very well be drawled out until the elements start doing they're work on Gale's deep untreated gash. My heart constricts and tears prick my eyes "please just save him" I add on pitifully. I hastily swipe away the few tears that have pricked my eyes then I'm forcing myself back into my role and walking back towards Gale. Each step towards him feels like another nail figuratively into my coffin. Would I be able to go on if Gale died as well? Would I be strong enough to have his death and the countless others I've witnessed while in the hunger games on my conscious?

Gale is leaning back with his eyes screwed shut tightly, his lips are white color from how hard he has them pressed together. As I let my legs drag me back to Gale, I can't stop from letting my eyes roam back down to his injured leg, which is bleeding once again. Once I reach him I waste no time before I'm once again on my knees as my hands work hastily with the small amount of gauze me have until it is securely wrapped around of Gale's calf, and before too long a few beads of blood seep through the gauze but there isn't anything more we can do so we both ignore it. Gale stares off to the entrance of our campsite for the night as I stare at his face intently, taking in his expressions and movements which are basically none existent besides the low huff of air he lets out before he continues to stare off into nothing scowling. I wish he would say something or at least I could think up something to say to take both of our minds off Gale's misfortune but I can't seem to get my mind to work. The only thing managing to run around in my head is how much I miss district twelve; and its not until then that I realize just how much I miss my usual mornings of playing the piano. Of the once solid friendship I use to think I shared with Katniss Everdeen. Of the many nights I spent out in the victor village taking care of my drunken godfather. Of the quiet talks my father and I had while we went for walks around the seam. Of my mothers groggy drugged up ramblings about her dead sister, she was convinced I was. The empty ache in my chest, constantly reminding me for the few people I love and miss. "We should eat then settle in for the night" Gale's gruff voice breaks the silence making me gasp lowly as my attention is brought out off my own head and back to the present. Gale's face is down casted, like he's embarrassed and very angry of the limitations of what he can do now that his leg is practically skewed through from that ghastly pink bird. I feel bad for Gale. I want more than anything to reach out an comfort him but I know, just by the tension in the air that I need to leave him alone so he can silently deal with this on his own, at least for a little while. I might be…well whatever I am to him now but by no means does that make me Katniss; the girl he could and would talk to about anything and everything. I'm just the pretty mayors daughter, who is just barely hanging onto her sanity. I don't know if its because of nerves or that I'm too far away in thought to actually care about Gale's wait when I help him move over to the cave, but its incredibly more easy than what I had to endure when I first attempted to help him.

Once inside our hiding place I situate Gale, so he'll be as comfortable as he can be while out here in the woods. Since Gale can't do much of anything I have him start splitting a small meal of some blackberries and a slice of bread while I quickly set up a few snares and trap of my own before heading back to Gale. The day slowly turns into night and yet not another attack is made on us or even the rest of the tributes.

I somehow manage to keep myself smiling, talking, and occasionally laughing with Gale, and even though we're in the awful hunger games and Gale is hurt I find that Gale and I are seeming to get closer; meaning no scowling or glares dealt towards me from the ever so sulking Gale Hawthorne.

"I'll take tonight's watch" I put forth giving Gale a cautious glance as I add my leaf and grass makeshift pillow to Gale's makeshift bed as well as my sleeping bag, not wanting him to get a cold along with his gash. Gale rolls his eyes at me and I try to ignore it but his steely gray eyes catch my own before I have the chance to drop them. "Madge…" he starts but I press my finger to his lips then force him to stay sitting by placing my hands forcefully on his shoulders, and even though I'm absolutely positive he can still overpower me in his weakened state he doesn't. He lets me press him back into his sitting position before crouching drown somewhat in front of him, "I'm too wide awake from what happened today to sleep Gale. So really you're giving me something to do instead of staring at the ceiling of this cave and thinking about all the terrible things that have happened…that still might happen…" I say then trail off. Gale stares at me and I can see that by some small miracle he understands what I mean and he seems to agree by the none committable grunt he gives me. The air feels slightly heavy with unspoken words yet neither of us can work up the courage to say anything so instead we each give each other a reassuring nod.

I stand still for a little while longer, just watching as Gale settles down in his sleeping bag before chucking mine at me with a pointed look that told me he'd tie me in it if I didn't accept it. "Thanks" I mumble picking up the sleeping bag. My feet feel sore and hurt almost with every step I take, not to mention that the once comforting scent of strawberries seems to have left both my skin and hair but I guess its expected with all that comes with, with being in the hunger games and all. I set up my post at the corner of the cave, my sleeping bag wrapped tightly around me making sure I stay as warm as possible but still I'm able to move swiftly and throw one of my knifes if needed. The air is crisp and seems to feel even colder than any of the past nights I've spent here and that's probably from the close looming of a victory in the short future, "yeah just how short though?" I think. My teeth anxiously start gnawing at my bottom lip while my eyes and ears stay peeled for any threat that might approach. The darkness covers us like a blanket making it entirely too tempting to sleep but with the night vision glasses on it's just another element around me.

The wind howls, rustles the bushes and tree branches outside as my eyes wander over to Gale' who I find is already fast asleep and this alone has me slightly worried, especially since he looks pale and there is a thin sheet of sweat on his forehead. With a hesitant glace towards the cave entrance and another glance back at Gale I swiftly stumble to my feet then as quiet as I can I make my way over to Gale. With each noisy step I manage to take the more my heart seems to clench. "he's just really tired" I think hastily, trying to ease my frantic mind as my shaky hand reaches out, brushing his bangs back so my slender fingers are met with the cold clammy sweaty flesh of his forehead before I quickly withdraw my hand and hurry back over to my spot with an even more heavier chest then I had just seconds ago. I ease myself back onto the cold hard ground and wrap the sleeping bag around my lower body so my hands are bale to move around hurriedly if needed. A rumble over head has a small gasp leaving my mouth and I guess it wouldn't have mattered if I had screamed because just a nanosecond later the air is filled with the loud sound of thunder that effortlessly raises goosebumps to my arms and the back of my neck. "Great" I think sarcastically, my hand immediately go up[ to cover my ears, not liking storms since I was three but I remember I'm being watched by all of Panem so with a slight hesitation I start pulling at the end of my hair of a few pieces of my hair.

The later the night gets the louder the rain and thunder outside seem to be. With every dragging second passing, I find myself sitting through the more the stress and pressure of not knowing what will happen to Gale. Will Haymitch even send anything for him? "He hasn't yet" I think bitterly letting out a whoosh of air as I do. Gale is getting sicker and sicker the longer Haymitch waits and I'm getting more infuriated. "if this is some ploy to get me out you better hope I don't make it out alive…at least not without Gale Haymitch" I breath into the air, knowing without a doubt that no one can hear me or maybe they can, hell they do have excellent sound quality on the camera's" I think, my eyes darting around the darkness outside our cave. Watching as some faint droplets of rain can be seen while the others are blind to me since the darkness around me impairs my sight.

"Just got to last a few more days…get the other few tributes out and make sure Gale hangs on till then" I think groggily. My hand shoots up and quickly rubs one then the other eye as I switch positions and thankfully I'm now sitting awkwardly on a rock, this alone tells me I will stay awake from my discomfort and if that doesn't work then I guess I'll have to wiggle around whenever I get drowsy so the rock will stab into me.


	21. Chapter 21: Waiting It Out

**_*Author note- I know I'm the worst for taking this long to post another chapter and I'm gravely sorry, but life got a hold of me. I can't promise that it won't happen again since I'm not able to see into the future but I can promise that I will finish this story no matter how long it takes. I hope that I still have some readers for this little fanfic. And since it took me so long to actually post another chapter I've decided to make this one a lot longer. Please forgive any errors, feel free to give me feedback whether its through a comment or a direct message, and as always enjoy my lovelies :) Without further adieu please read on. _**

******_-007twihunger xoxo_**

**_Chapter Twenty One: Waiting It Out_**

"Gale. Where is Gale?" I think, spinning in a circle looking all around the woods that surround me, but nothing. The trees all around me are swaying in the light breeze, the wind is cold against my nose and cheeks. A shadowed figure steps out from between two trees causing me to immediately stop and trip over a tree root, which effectively makes me slam into the ground leaving me gasping for air. I stare up into the sky gasping, trying to regain my ability to breath when a shadow looms over me. I turn, still slightly gasping and I see a very familiar blond standing over me. Looking at me as if I were a prize in its self and this alone has me wanting more than anything to just die before he can act out any of the twisted things floating around in his head.

Cato smirks looking down at me, "just the two of us left Madge" he puts forth, his dark blue eyes seem to gradually turn more black then blue. My heart about stops, my head feels like its swirling so dangerously that I might puke. "No that's not right" I think, my eyes staying locked on Cato's, taking in the emptiness that gives him an almost dead stare. I swallow thickly, pulling in a large breath once I can, then I'm slowly raising myself up on my arms, so slowly that it would almost seem I wasn't moving at all. I freeze when Cato looks away from me and smirks, and of course curiosity gets the best of me and I glance to where he's looking. A sharp pain surges through my very core. A type of pain I had no idea I was capable of feeling. All around me is carnage, blood everywhere. My stomach turns as the edges of my vision starts to blur and for a few seconds I don't know why until I feel the very familiar felling of tears start gliding down my cheeks, no doubt making clean marks in there wake. My tears drip off my chin then absorb into my shirt.

My throat is hoarse and dry not permitting any sound besides the occasional sniffle. All around me are the dead bodies of my allies and of the other tributes, some I've personally killed. "I'm going to have some fun with you before I kill you twelve." Cato practically purrs at me, making vomit quickly rise up into my throat. My head jerks some so I'm once again staring at the large tribute from two. My heart pounding rapidly in my ears as my eyes widen, seeing the shiny glint of the dull blade Cato holds in his clenched right hand.

Quickly as I can I start scrambling backwards before stumbling to my feet, I give Cato one last glance before I make a run for it but he's expecting this. With one swift movement of his arm, Cato grabs a handful of my hair easily stopping me and jerking me back down to the ground. I hit the ground with a loud gasp as my stomach and face hit the ground causing a small billow of dirt to cloud in front of me. My eyes slowly start to take in the still form that lays motionless not even a foot away from me. With one glance at the figure a sob chokes in my throat and tears prick my eyes. Rue lays wide eyed a few feet away from me just staring at me lifelessly, but I know she's not really looking at me from the dull lifeless look to her big brown eyes. A sharp pain erupts through my left side causing me to grunt as the air leaves my body, from the connection of Cato's foot to my side. I can't stifle the cry that leaves my throat the second time his boot collides with my side once again, this time causing me to roll over from the force he puts into his kick. My ears are met with his cruel sick laughter as my eyes land on the pale face of River. More tears fill my eyes as I begin to make a lame attempt at crawling away from Cato but am stopped when he grabs a hold of my ankle and pulls me back, causing my heart to instantly drop and the last sliver of hope to sizzle into nonexistence.

Just as soon as Cato grabs my ankle he drops it with force. My eyes meet his for a half second before he glances down, a sick twisted smile now plastered on his face, then the next thing I know is that I'm being dragged by a handful of my hair towards a very bloodied body. I don't care that no one besides us can hear as I let a hoarse scream erupt from me, my fingernails digging at Cato's much larger hands even though I know its useless since I was going to die in the very near future by this crazed career. With a harsh shove Cato drops me to the ground, my head smacks into something as equally as hard as it making me instantly dizzy. I try to rise up so I'm sitting since my head is filled with fuzzy dizziness but every attempt is met with a shove or a kick to my side from Cato until I finally just give up, allowing the sticky yet warm blood absorb into my clothes and cake my body and hair as I lay still on the hard earth.

The sky is an eerie gray, one that tells of my coming doom. The kind that you can feel in your very bones by just taking a look around, all too suddenly rain starts to fall down on us.

A guttered choke causes me to flinch then turn swiftly around so I'm now facing the blood covered body of someone. My eyebrows knit together as I continued to stare at the body that seemed motionless only seconds ago but if it wasn't for the slight rise and fall of the chest I would think the person was dead. The person is so badly caked in blood that I'm not too sure at all who it is, but the look of the body it seemed to be a boy. Not being able to help myself I glance over my shoulder to find a smirking Cato, who looks all too pleased with himself. "I didn't kill him" he puts forth, a scary gleam to his eyes as he spoke, practically looking through me until he turns his gaze to the poor guy who is obviously barely hanging onto life by a thread. That's when I really take a look at the guy laying beside me and start to really recognize his distinct features that gave me the heart wrenching realization that the bloodied guy next to me is none other than Gale. I choke on a inaudible sob, my eyes not being able to look away from Gale's blood caked face. Because I'm so distracted with Gale I don't notice Cato take a few more steps towards me until I'm wrenched backwards some, by my hair. Making me let out a pained grunt that effectively makes Gale's eyes flutter open until my light blue eyes meet his dull intense grey eyes. "Madge" Gale grunts out barely above a whisper, his eyes filled with all the fear and dread that I feel inside.

Cato continues to drag me back until I'm a good distance away from Gale, who is still staring at me with wide glassy eyes. "I'm fine" I get out before the words even register to my brain. Not even a few seconds later Cato drops me with a small grunt before my face is met swiftly with a heavy boot to the side of my head causing my head to loll to the side as I fall backwards to the ground easily. My vision is plagued with black spots and a strange fuzziness tinted to it, while my ears ring. Something grabs my shoulder tightly then yanks me until I'm laying motionless on back, staring up at the sky trying to get my vision to focus but before I can something heavy is set on my stomach as a dull knife is pressed to my throat, "let's give lover boy a show, huh." Cato mumbles against the shell of my ear.

With a gasp I sit bolt up. My eyes travel all around, taking in everything around me. My heart is heavy and my eyes burn from tears when I realize I'm being held back by something, that is until I realize its just my sleeping bag. A small sigh of relief passes through my lips realizing it was all just once big nightmare. My hands shake uncontrollably in my lap as I inaudibly pant from the fear still coursing through me form my all too real seeming dream. The entrance of the cave is dark, which tells me that its still nighttime and that I didn't sleep for too long.

A low groan has my head snapping to the side, so fast that my neck hurts. Gale is curled up tightly in his makeshift bed, a thin sheen of sweat lining his eyebrows as his skin looks an awful pale grayish color that effectively turns my stomach with just the one look. His teeth chatter uncontrollably and once again my chest is heavy knowing that he's getting sick. Even though I've had the experience of taking care of my sick mother since I was a child I can't do much for Gale here. "He's just going to have to continue to be stubborn until I can get him out" I think, my own teeth gnawing onto my bottom lip as I silently try to think up some type of plan, at least something to move towards.

To say I'm tired would be understatement but knowing how weak Gale is already getting, I can't bring myself to wake him up for his turn for watch. Instead I hold back my yawn and burry myself deeper into the warmth of my sleeping bag as my light blue eyes turn to look up at the sky wishing more than anything that a few pictures would pop into the sky so I could get Gate home sooner but I know that won't be happening anytime soon. I feel instant regret and guilt about my thought as soon as it passed through my head. The fact that I would even wish for someone's death makes me physically ill. It makes me feel like I'm nothing different form the people in the capital, President Snow, and the careers.

The slight whimper that leaves Gale's lips makes my head snap back towards him and leaves me with a soar aching neck but that doesn't matter at the moment since I can see that Gale looks somehow worse in the few seconds I was looking elsewhere. I swallow thickly then faster then I knew I could move I shove off my sleeping bag and crawl over to Gale, eliminating the gap between us. I ignore the rocks that scrape and tear at my knees and palms as I situate myself close next to Gale. His eyebrows are furrowed as he sleeps, his teeth chattering much more audibly now, and this alone causes my heart to drop into my stomach. With some hesitation I reach my hand out towards his forehead and feel it. He feels cold and clammy, which tells me that he's not getting any better but instead the quite opposite.

Gently I brush my fingertips through his dirty, unruly hair. Moving as slow as possible, not wanting to wake Gale and be reprimanded like a child just for trying to help him as much as I possibly could.

Even though my hands are warm they're in no way as warm as Gale's forehead feels. Easily my stomach churns and I feel sick, but I'm not too sure if its from the fatigue finally starting to set in or that I might barf just thinking about Gale not making it out of this god forsaken game, all because he got in the way of what was obviously meant for me. A fleeting thought passes through my head before I'm plagued with it. All the while I don't stop myself from gently running my fingers thorough Gale's hair.

I could walk out into the woods and wait for the whatever mutt the capital sends to off me, most likely one of those horrendous pink birds. My heart sinks as a low whimper slips pass Gale's lips. My eyes snap back to his face and I take in his now furrowed eyebrows and slightly scrunched up face that easily tells me he's having a bad dream and just that look alone I'm once again back into the roll I knew so well. My fingers keep brushing through his hair as I started to hum just like I did for my mother back home….or rather use to do. My heart clenches and I can't help the strangled sob as I think about my mother and the fact that I didn't even get to see her one last time as me. That I won't be home in time for her funeral, I won't be able to grieve for her even if or when I make it out of this hellhole. If I make it out of here alive with Gale like I hope to then I'll be a victor, just like Finnick and all the rest of them. I will no longer be a person but an object to be sold and prodded until the people grow tired of me and from the fact that they haven't grown tired of cocky Finnick then what hope does the little mayors daughter from the district twelve have, the girl who follows the role to a tee.

I don't know how long I sit and run my fingers through Gale's hair while humming but I know it must be for the better part of the night since the sun is now slowly emerging into the sky. I glance down at Gale and idly stop running my fingers through his hair as a thought pops into my head, not really a thought but more of a memory. Of all the mornings of watching from my bedroom window as two seam kids raced towards the fence then swiftly duck under it before taking off for the tree line. My heart lurches knowing that Gale and Katniss use to be up at the crack of dawn every morning to check there traps before school. There is no doubt in my mind that Gale is very sick, but I can't be quite sure of just how sick he is. "I'm sorry I can't do more for you" I find myself whispering into the air, my eyes trained on Gale. Not expecting to get a response and not getting one in the least. Instead my ears are met with the very familiar sound of a soft beeping, a beeping that could only be placed with a sponsors gift. Immediately my eyes snap towards the entrance of the cave as I slowly start extracting myself from Gale so I won't wake him up, knowing he needs as much sleep as he can get.

Once I'm fully standing and I'm absolutely positive Gale is still in his deep slumber I race towards the entrance of the cave as fast as I can, all the while I try to control the amount of sound I make, channeling my inner huntress. Instantly I regret not stopping to grab a weapon when I'm completely out of the cave but that thought fly's from my mind when I take in the small container that quickly douses the hope I had only seconds ago blooming in my chest. With quick foot work I make my way over to the sponsor gift then easily snatch it up into my hands before opening it. Just as I had presumed the container only contains some broth and some fever pills. I guess they both can help Gale to an extent but not with the small gaping hole in his leg, the thought alone leaves me hunched over at the waist as my head seems to swim and nausea fights its way up my throat. But before I can embarrass myself with puking I hear a small cry. Not one out of sadness of anger, no one from pain and that's enough to make both the dizziness and sickness disperse, hopefully indefinitely.

I race back into the cave, no longer caring to be quiet. The sponsor gift long forgotten and discarded on the ground outside the cave where I found it, the only thought seeming to reach me is that Gale is in trouble and needs me. I won't loose him as well.

Gale is slowly working himself into a sitting position when I reach him and immediately I feel dumb for thinking the worst, what was I thinking? Nothing could have even gotten in to hurt him without me seeing it first. I don't spend too much longer lost in thought since Gale is looking at me with bleary eyes that he quickly rubs at. "Hey" I mumble lamely, wishing more than anything I hadn't seeing Gale flinch away from the volume of my hoarse voice, "sorry" I croak clearing my throat but Gale just waves it off, not really even paying that much attention to me. Instead he turns his attention down towards his legs which are hidden away inside the sleeping bag. As I see him start to fiddle clumsily with the zipper another pang of fear and pain grip my heart knowing how clumsily Gale was only days ago, knowing it's all my fault he's hurt. "Don't move" I plead, causing him to glance up at me with furrowed eyebrows before he raises one in challenge. I swallow feeling my cheeks start to heat from embarrassment, "that-that wasn't what I meant. I-we got a sponsor gift while you were out-nothing much but it could help." I find myself rushing out under the unrelenting stare Gale gives me.

His eyebrows colloid once again as his eyes drop down to my hands before he's once again looking at me with a raised brow. "What sponsor gift?" it feel like my eyes pop comically large as embarrassment once again colors my cheeks as I remember tossing the sponsor girt to the ground at the sound of Gale's pained cry. "I-I'll just got get it." I force out, not really knowing if he heard me as I stare at the ground then hurriedly make my way back out of the gave to retrieve the sponsor gift for a second time, and hopefully the last time. Gale would no doubt think I was daft if I came back empty handed again.

In no time at all I'm racing back into the cave with the small metal container clutched tightly to my chest, no willing to somehow loose it this time.

"Swallow these" I order Gale handing him two fever capsules as I lower myself to the ground beside him, not looking up as I quickly divert my attention to one of the canteens I fumble with a few times before I can get the lid off. When I turn back to look at Gale, canteen already held out towards him, to find him staring at me in confusion. "What's this?" his gravelly voice asks. I didn't realize how much the question would hurt me until its uttered, but when it is I can't ignore it. It seems to pierce through my entire being. I look at him for a second longer, blinking a few times, as if that would make his words and those capsules disappear but with no luck. "There for fever, you can check for yourself" I state in a monotone, my eyes not leaving his gray ones. I thrust the canteen towards him gently, as to not jostle him or his injured leg in the least before I quickly start to turn away to grab the pill bottle to show him, however a gentle grasp to my hand stops me. I glance back up at Gale and find a dreamy smile on his lips, "I believe you Madge" he states then tosses back the capsules before taking a small sip of water and making a face. "Taste funny" he notes slowly working himself down to a more comfortable position so he was some what laying down.

I frown then rise the canteen to my nose to smell it. My frown intensifies before I quickly clear my face of any emotion and take a small sip of the water as well. I want to cry when I taste the familiar thirst quenching taste of water. I had almost prayed it had something off to it, at least a little bit so that I would know Gale was fine but obviously that isn't the problem. He's getting worst faster than I anticipated and I've never been more worried.

Now that I'm aware of Gale more detreating state I really look at him once again. Taking in his sweat ridden hair and the thin sheen of sweat lining his eyebrows and how he almost looks as white as one of president snows flowers. I swallow away my fears as I'm so use to doing back home for my mother-or rather was-and give Gale a sweet smile. "You must be hungry" I state turning back towards the small container I placed on the cave floor next to me. "I'll just start a fire and heat this up for you okay?" I add on, not expecting much more than a grunt of acknowledgment from Gale but instead my ears are met with "I'm not hungry" and my whole body feels like its lost all its oxygen.

I jerk my head towards Gale, the container clasped tightly in my hands as I stare at him. I open my mouth a few times then close it, not trusting what might come out since it doesn't feel anything close to words. With a good cough then a clear of my throat I brace myself for a trying fight with Gale knowing he needs to continue to eat, especially with how fast he seems to be getting sicker and sicker by each and every passing moment. "What?" I ask almost in a whisper, lost in the now light howling breeze blowing in from outside. I can't help but swallow thickly and pray to that all that is holy that I only misheard him but his words that follow nail the coffin into my dread. "I said I'm not hungry Madge-just-just give me a little bit then-yeah then I'll eat" he says with a small nod of his head as if he wasn't talking to me anymore but himself. I feel the burn of stomach acid climb up my throat as puke threatens to spew from my lips, please no him too. Please don't take him from me.

I'm not too sure how long we sit in silence but I know its long enough that Gale's eyes start to flicker close and another round of pain seizes my heart. "Well too damn bad your eating Hawthorne" I grit out, startling Gale back awake. I don't get to see the expression he gives me before I practically stomp out of the cave to get started on heating his soup even though the container feels nice and warm in my hands. But the canteen in my other hand needs to be refilled I tell myself, so I keep walking because I need to stay busy o I I'll loose it again.

It doesn't take me too long at all to find the small stream by the cave and refill the canteen then adding the treatment dropt. And because I don't want to hurry back and deal with a Gale who's almost to the point of actually lying down and giving up. My eyes stay locked on the sky above as I hug my knees to my chest waiting for the water to be done but most importantly until I'm sure I'm not about to break and freak out. I had almost lost it on Gale before I left and the realization of how I can't be alone really sets in. If Gale dies I know there won't be that much pushing me towards winning besides the promise I made to little bird. A low groan has me quickly stumbling to my feet then rising the metal container above my head ready to throw it as a weapon once I found my intruder, the sight of an even paler Gale holding onto a tree with so much force that I'm sure its taking all of his strength to keep him standing makes all the fight leave me. I lower the canister but don't drop it instead I quickly pick up the canteen then jog the small distance between Gale and myself before helping him lean against me and start the small walk back to the cave that I know will take longer with the added extra weight of Gale.

"I thought you left" Gale states after a while causing me to glance at him out of the corner of my eye but not deter our progress, knowing if I stopped know my tired legs wouldn't be able to continue to hold most of Gale's weight. I shake my head slightly then turn my head towards him only to be met with a face full of dark brown hair as Gale rests his head against my shoulder, letting out a low groan of pain as his hand tighten its grasp on my arm, giving me a tight pinch I'm sure he's unaware of. I turn back to look where we're watching before stating "I would never just leave you Gale, not for anything" he seems to give what I'm presuming is a slight nod even though it only feels like a slight rock to his head from our bumping walk and our slightly different height. "I got scared" he puts forth before going quiet just as we reach the cave once again, so I let the conversation die while silently praying to myself that the second Gale's better I'll ask him what scared him, hoping it won't be something I don't want to hear but knowing it very well could be.

With a lot of effort I manage to get Gale back into his sleeping bag in a comfortable position. With less grace then I'm use to using I plop down onto the ground then stifle a small smile at the berating I would get from my father from something so un-lady like, well that is until I remember just what follows those talk and instantly I'm sick with the thought of Snow's watchful snake eyes as I got lashed. Just the thought alone makes me tighten my grip on my jacket not wanting the pale raised scars on my sink to be seen but knowing there safe, hidden away from sight. With clumsy fingers of my own I open the container then scoop a decent size bite of broth onto the small spoon that came with it then hold it out for Gale, only he looks at it with a wrinkled nose, disgust prominent in his features. "I'm really not hungry Madge. Just tired-really tired." He mumbles out from behind his hands that scrub at his face. My eyes prick with tears as a thick blanket of dread layers my stomach threatening to disarm me with the last bit of my sanity. And just as I'm starting to fumble with thoughts of holding down Gale and pouring the broth down his throat, but then again he is still bigger and stronger than me and I'm almost positive he could fight me off, my mind is bombarded with the faces of River, Rue, of Avery, and of Marvel. And to my everlasting surprise all of the other tributes who I hadn't met but had died in this sick game, for the capitols sick amusement-all because of President Snow.

I steel a glance at the container of broth before looking back at Gale, who I find is staring at me, waiting for my response and immediately the fire I had burning to keep Gale alive reignites and I swear I could almost hear Peeta whispering "that's the Madge I know and love" and that only makes me more determined to keep Gale alive and fighting, regardless if I have to fight with Gale to do it.

"Gale, we need to get some food inside you, you need to eat" I insist. "It'll only come back up" he puts forth weakly, his eyes seem to have found the ground of the cave more interesting than our conversation and I know he knows I'm right. But thankfully he permits me to give him a few bites of soup, even if its only three. At least its something. "Thanks. I feel a lot better now—can I sleep now, Madge?" he practically pleads, a tired gleam to his eyes. "Soon" I find myself saying, trying in vain to think up anything to keep him up and alert but most importantly awake. If he goes to sleep then maybe he won't wake up again. I remember when my mother first got really sick I would fear the same thing, even going as far as to camp on the floor beside her bed and shaking her awake every few minutes to make sure she was okay. That was until my father found out, he had forbidden me to go into her room for a solid two weeks, stating that my mother needed her rest and not to be pestered. After that day I would only be aloud to visit my mother while accompanied with my father of one of the maids who took care of her, until I was older and understood just how sick she was.

With a not too subtle shake of my head I remove the painful memories from my mind and focus on Gale who has taken my moment of distraction to close his eyes. "Gale" I snap, causing him to jerk awake and glare at me and this alone lets me know he's till somewhat fighting and that alone makes my job a little bit more easy. "What?" Gale replies, a sour expression taking over his face as he reaches up to scratch at his chin which is void of any hair but already knowing how the games work I pay it no mind and instead state "I need to look at your leg first." Trying as hard as I can to be as gentle as I can, I help Gale pull his injured leg free from the sleeping bag then even more gentler I slowly start to roll his pant leg up, only to reveal the angry hole the mutt left, but in no way does it prepare me for the awful sight of pus and the starting of a faint red line. I steal a glance at Gale only to find him staring at the ceiling with a pained expression, "could you please hurry up" he grits. I nod, knowing he can't see me but not being able to stop either. With deft fingers I unscrew the cap on the canteen and pour it over his leg, watching sickly as some of the pus drained down his leg with the water.

I want to puke, to cry, to scream for my father and beg him to make Gale alright but I know even my father can't help me now that we're in Snow's watchful grasp, so instead I gently use the sleeve of my coat to help rinse out Gale wound only to be met with a pained grunt from Gale, only to mutter back a whispered apology I'm not too sure he heard. I takes half of the water in the canteen to clear away the remaining pus before I quickly reapply the last bit of ointment and what bandages we have left onto his leg, thanking god that Gale kept his gaze away from his injured leg and on the cave ceiling.

After that there's not too much more talking between the two of us, just the steady whistling of the wind outside and the occasionally groans of pain from Gale while he slept, all the while I watched him unrelentingly. Around what I can only presume is noon with how high the sun is in the sky do I wake Gale for another couple bites of soup but only seem to get one before an almost silent sick groan makes its way past his pale chapped lips. My heart all about shatters knowing I need to take another look at his leg but not wanting to see the damage, for fear of the exact thoughts I've been trying to fight off since Gale got injured.

More than anything I wish I had some way to help Gale, to heal him. But I've never been much of a nurse not like Mrs. Everdeen and little Primrose, or even probably Katniss. If she was here with Gale she'd know what to do. She'd be brave and strong, not a coward and weak like me. She'd probably be back home with Gale by now if she was in my place and the thought alone brakes my heart, even in here I'm still a let down. Always wanting to help but only causing destruction in my wake. Almost immediately my throat feels tight while my stomach feels sick and I can't help but wish I was in Gale's position instead, at least someone worth while would go home. At least Gale had the means to help do something back home, life not only feed his family but probably Katniss' as well. I steal a watery glance at Gale before bracing myself and wiping my eyes hurriedly then with gently fingers I proceed to uncover Gale's leg with his help before he completely gives over to me while dealing with his pant leg.

Since I somewhat now know how gentle and light to touch Gale as well as how slow to unravel the gauze wrapped around his injured leg I seem to go somewhat faster then either of the other times while dealing with his leg, but unlike the other times this time I don't have too much hope in my corner, especially with the now darker red line that looks like its making its way from the small gaping hole in his leg up towards his shin. My breathing hitches and I feel my eyes prick with fresh tears as my mouth dry's void of any saliva. My hands shake as I quickly unscrew the lid once more from the canteen but unlike last time I accidently splash some water onto Gale causing him to glance at me in confusion only for his expression to morph into a concern one once he seen my face.

"Madge" Gale breaths out then trails off, probably not knowing what to say, and honestly neither do I so I ignore him mumbling out a strained "we just need to give it a little air-then" however before I can finish my sentence Gale cuts in, "then you'll patch me up?" he questions. His voice isn't malicious in the least but instead its pretty much void of any real emotion, like he's oblivious to the whole thing and I guess maybe he is, or maybe be its just me hoping he is. My eyes trail up his now swollen leg up to what is seeable of his knee only to suck in a sharp breath seeing that his knee looks to be swollen as well. I look up at Gale and try to give him a stern look, "that's right, then we just wait out the other and go home rich victors" I can't help but say. Gale looks at me like he feels sorry for me and the look alone makes me drop my head and continue on my work. First lightly pouring more water over his cut then stifling a sob as fervently scrapped at the empty metal container of what use to be burn ointment until a heavy hand settles onto my shoulder causing me to completely freeze, breathing and all, in fear of breaking down no doubt probably like all Panem think I will, not this time though. Not while Gale is so closely watching me.

With a heavy sigh and a defeated slump of my shoulders I glance up at Gale, my bangs falling into my eyes obscuring my sight slightly. "Madge" Gale says gently, but I just shake my head "your going to be fine" I lie easily plastering on one of my smiles and thrusting the small remaining's of the berries Rue picked towards him "you just eat this and relax . . . I'll worry about everything else okay" I know he can tell I'm close to tear and maybe that's what stops him from arguing. He just nods and takes the small container from me and forces one then another berry into his mouth, "thank you" I can't help but mouth to him not really knowing for sure if my voice would waver or not, he just nods then turns back to his berries giving me what little privacy he can and I can't help but silently thank him.

Once I'm sure I'm not going to bawl like a baby I turn my attention back towards Gale's injury and trying to remember anything I've seen, heard, or even read about but nothing seems to be coming to mind that is until I glance up at Gale again and take notice of him forcing down the last of the berries Rue picked and the berries immediately make me think about the leaves that draw out tracker jacker venom and then I can't stop smiling like a fool. I swiftly get to my feet then mumble a quick "I'll be right back" before racing out of the cave and out into the woods in search for some of the leaves and while searching I come across of the some nightlock that causes me to pause. I stare at the bush of deadly berries that look very similar to blueberries but are a darker black blue color that slightly hints at its deadly effect.

For a fleeting moment I think about just taking a handful of berries and swallowing them, that'd sure make all the mental pain I feel go away. Just as the thought comes to mind it disappears and surprisingly sweet Peeta's face replaces it. He has a harsh glare on his face, the very same glare he would send to anyone he heard saying anything mean towards me. I swallow once and drop my head to my hands which at some point plucked a decent handful of the deadly berries subconsciously. I frown, slowly rising the handful of berries to my face, not really sure in the least what my next move might be since my mind is getting more and more confused with old painful memories. If I just eat a couple of these then it will all be over for me. I wouldn't have to worry about playing President Snow's game any longer, I wouldn't have to deal with the hushed hateful comments targeted at me or the nasty looks that follow. None of the Capitol guests would try and steal my virtue, as if it was a placed up for bid and sold off to the heist bidder. All at once my legs give out from underneath me as I remember that I'm now motherless and no doubt will be fatherless if I return back home to twelve. He wouldn't be able to look at me since I look so similar to my own mother. A small sob chokes in my throat and my hand holding the Nightlock starts to shake uncontrollably making it slightly hard to not drop any of the deadly berries.

If I return home I will be plagued with memories of these games for the rest of my life. Of what I've done and what I've witnessed here. Of all the gory deaths will be like a constant movie reel playing continuously, and I'll be even more of a broken girl I use to be. Not to mention the lack of anyone I could count on to help me stay sane. Now that my mother is gone and that my father will most certainly check out, I'll be alone besides for Haymitch, Peeta, and Gale. I can't count on anyone I use to talk to, to want to be associated with me since now I'm no doubt labeled as a blood thirst monster like the careers. My hand rises closer to my mouth and I find myself letting my mouth drop open slightly as I continue to rise my hand then it pauses at the thought of Gale. He'll surely die without someone looking out for him. With a guttered growl I toss the handful of berries at the ground harshly, tears now flowing openly down my cheeks.

"That's my Madgie, always a fighter" I can almost can hear Peeta say and this alone forces me to get back to my feet then roughly wipe my eyes dry against my dry coat sleeve. I shake my head in disbelief at the bush of Nightlock. What the hell was I thinking? I have to stay strong for Gale, I have to get him home . . . back to his family. I lick my chapped lips, running my tongue over the scabbed over cut in it a few times before quickly lurching forward and quickly picking another handful of berries then gently stuffing them into my pocket. With a nod of finality I turn and start my trek for those pesky leaves which I find a good few meters down from the Nightlock bush with only thoughts about maybe tricking what few tributes are left into eating them or if worst comes to play then maybe giving Gale and myself a peaceful way out, but I can't help but hope for the foremost instead of the latter.

After grabbing as much of the tracker dracker draining leaves as I can I quickly make my way back to Gale, looking over my shoulder every once in a while making sure nothing and no one are following me or are preparing for an attack.


	22. Chapter 22 Deceptive decisions

***Authors Note- I know, I know! It's been along time. Sorry guys, but you know how life can get. Growing hectic and grabbing a hold of you, and such. I hope you like this chapert. I tried to lengthen it as a peace treaty of sorts. Please forgive any errors I've missed. I hope you enjoy, feel free to comment and message your thoughts and opinions, I'd love to hear from you all. **

** -xoxo 007twihunger**

When I get back to the cave it's to an alert Gale, who lays proped up against the wall of the cave. A look of relief clouds his features as his gray eyes land on me as I walk into the cave towards him. My hands are fisted around the ends of my sleeves. My throat and chest heavy with emothions I haven't even deciphered yet.

"You were gone awhile." Gale notes, his eyes falling from mine and fixing on my boots I stole from Glimmer. I subconsciously lick my chapped lips, eyebrows furrow in slightly as I fight back the image of her disfigured face in my mind. My stomach turns causing me to shift awkwardly on my feet before closing the distance between us and lower myself down onto the ground next to Gale, the whole while not meeting his gaze, that I now feel burning into the side of my face. "Sorry. I guess I walk a little slower than I realized when I'm trying to be sneaky," I say with a small forced smile gracing my lips.

Gale shifts next to me, causing me to glance over at him out of curiosity. Taking in the fact that Gale has closed the small distance I left between us. His shoulder brushes against mine as I watch on in slight awe, as his head slowly turns against the wall of the cave until his gaze is locked with mine. A small hint of a smile touching at his lips making my breath hitch in my throat at the beauty of the sight. Even in these games, and a few days worth of grime on him and he still looks as handsome as always.

"I imagine not too much of that was in silence there, huh?" Gale pulls. A smirk swiftly replacing his small smile causing me to let out a snort of laughter. My lips stretching into a wider grin, that easily tears my lip apart from each other. Letting a miniscule droplet of blood, to trickle down my bottom lip before quicklily licking it away.

"Of course. How else would I practice my giant impression," I state stoicly. My ears are met with a chortle from Gale as his eyes crinkle at the edges. I watch as he shakes his head slowly with humor. "Yeah. I don't know how appealing a giant Madge would be." Gale states, his smile slowly sliding from his face. Leaving him with a slightly content expression. I roll my eyes, which is met with a shoulder bump from a once again smiling Gale. "I'm only kidding Madge. I would like you regardless of anything." His words leave me blushing furiously. I duck my head, then cock it so I'm looking at the entrance of the cave. A large smile causes my cheeks to ache with happiness. I know my attempt at concealing my delight is a useless though I don't seem to be able to stop myself from being embarrassed since the only other guys to show me any interest was a boy I knew my whole life.

I swallow thickly turning my head at a slow pace back to look at Gale, to gage his reaction. My bottom lip becomes ensnared between my teeth once again in anxiety. "Really?" I can't help but lamely whispering. My eyes dropping to my lap only to swiftly dart back up to Gale's eyes when his hand interlaces with mine. Giving my hand a squeeze Gale gives his head a slight jerks nodding, before clearing his throat, as his eyebrowsfurrow together. "Yeah." His reply hangs in the air like a rainbow after a rainstorm. My lips pull apart in a wide smile as I drop my gaze to our conjoined hands, feeling a sense of unease hanging over top of us. From what awaits us. Of what could happen and go wrong. So much things could make the largest change to Gale and myself. And, yet I can't find it in me to believe in any other option than getting Gale home, still regardless if I'm with him. If a sacrifice is needed, than so be it. As long as Gale is alive and safe, it will all be worth it then.

"You should try and get some sleep." I find myself saying in a confident tone. Though I feel anything but that. However, rest is always good on a healing body and hopefully, maybe some sleep might make a large change on Gale's deteriorating state. I find myself having to pull in a deep breath in order to keep the bile from rising up in my throat at the thought that anything but that will happen. And knowing it might not do anything in the least.

Gale doesn't day anything for a while. Just stares where our hands are conjoined as well, before his eyes jump to my face causing heat to rise to my cheeks at being caught staring at him. He gives me a small smile and nods once in affirmation, retracting his hand from my own to scatch at the back of his head then slowly lowering himself back down on the ground a pale complection taking over more of his skin, no doubt from the exertion he is putting his already fragile body through.

I watch him until he swiftly slips to sleep. The slight snore he emits draws my lips up into a smile, and I can't help from reaching over and pulling the sleeping bag higher on his shoulders before pausing and staring at his pale yet beautiful face. For so long I dreamed of Gale returning my affection that now that I know he does I have no idea what to do. I was never good with boys or feelings and relationship so I can't help but feel in uncharted waters with Gale. In a place I have never been and had honestly never thought I would experience. Some how along the way of always following the rules and staying in line I have found myself deeply in love with him and by some miraculous reason he feels the same. It's kind of like some messed up dream. That it only took the hunger games to open up the possible option of being with Gale.

I find myself almost wanting to laugh at the misfortune, and wonder if that will be how this whole relationship will be? Riddled with dispaire and destruction everywhere it surrounds. I swallow thickly once again, licking my lips my eyes trace over Gale's features imprinting them to my mind, so as to not forget. His face is lacking any brooding expression and this surprisingly makes him look that much more handsome and more his age. His faces is littered with an assortment of different scars, probably from his many years in the seam and the woods.

The thought of the long years he had to struggle living in the seam while I got things I didn't need thrown at me ragulerly. With a small inhale of breath I quickly dip down and place a swift, chaste kiss on his forehead before pulling back with a hot blush burning my face. I quickly get to my feet keeping my head casted downwards in order to keep my bright red face hidden from the sight of all Panem. If something happens to Gale, I don't know what I will do.

Quietly I make my way over to my abandoned sleeping bag near the entrance of the cave. I gently plop down onto it, all the while gnawing on my bottom lip subconsciously. My eyes sweep over to Gale's sleeping body before flickering back toward the entrance of the cave. I stare unseeingly at the shadow the light throws onto the wall of the cave. My mind slowly starting to be overcome with panic at the idea of having to wait any longer. Not knowing how long Gale will be able to force himself to endure, before his body just shuts down and dies.

My mind feels numb while my heart feels painstricken with sorrow.

How am I supposed to keep Gale alive when I have no way of eliminating the other opponents. All of a sudden my throat feels too tight to draw in any air. I swallow a few times trying to clear it. My eyes wide with tears as my gut clenched painfully at the very real scenario that we might soon find ourselves in. In seconds I'm swiftly pulling my knees to my chest, clutching them tightly to myself. Turning my fingers white from how hard they grip my legs. I feel my body start to shake as I try to pull in a steady breath. However, I only find myself rapidly sucking in air as I'm overcome with tears. The gravity of the situation finally hitting me full force.

I feel like I'm a little child all over again. Completely defenseless and incapable of anything besides being overrun by my emotions. I let out an angered, irritated groan. My hands immediately go to my hair, tangling my fingers in my hair only to yank at it as I try to muffle a pained sob, by pressing my mouth against my right knee. Closing my eyes tightly, I feel my tears gliding effortlessly down my cheeks and absorbing on impact into the collar of my filthy shirt. "I can't live without him Haymitch." I find myself saying in a gravelly voice. My words easily get lost in the howling of the wind outside of the cave. I feel hollow and numb entirely. And I find myself with no way of telling what to possibly do, to make any of this better.

Before I can stop myself I let out a loud sob, that seems to echo for a breif moment in the cave. I squeeze my eyes even tighter shut. Trying to will my tears to stop. Only to be met will even more tears.

"Madge?" Gale's unsuspecting voice calls out to me, unsure and gentle. In a swift second, my breath is halted in my throat as I try to unconsciously wipe at my teary eyes with the side of my right sleeve. Before hesitantly looking over at Gale, only to fine him staring at me with an expression, somewhere mixed between confusion and pain. His eyes cut into mine, and yet we both stay silent. And maybe for the moment it's for the best.

We stare at each other in a calm silence. Every so often a chilling breeze sweeps through the opening of the cave, tickling my neck and face with the fridge man-made winds. I lick my lips. Stealing my self with a large breath before letting my eyes drift over to where Gale's boots lie next to our backpacks. "Do you feel refreshed?" I ask. I frown hearing my gruff voice, then quickly swallow down some plehm and clear my throat.

"As much as I expected I'd get. Are... Are you alright Madge?"

His question takes me by surprise, causing me to hesitantly release a breath I had no idea I was holdong. I shrug my shoulders, letting my eye pinch together as I drop my eyes to stare at my boots. My eyes roaming over a small singe in the rubber on the bottom of the shoe. "Yeah-just... I'm fine. Just a little home sick I guess." I put forth with another shrug of my shoulders. Forcing myself to not sneak a peek at Gale's expression, as I try weakly to busy myself with a loose piece of thread on the bottom heam of my shirt. Sluggishly I twirl the loose thread around my index finger before pinching it down with my thumb and giving a sharp yank then depositing the stran of thread onto the floor of the cave. My eyes shift momentarily to watch the thread gliding gently until it stills on the ground when it drops.

I hear him chuckle, which is followed closely by some movement and some muffled groans of pain. "Yeah, so do I." He replies. "Though I don't know how long I'd survive with your dad having seen us kissing," His words hang in the air for a breif few seconds before I'm overcome with a loud laugh, shaking my head slightly as my eyes trail over to Gale's gray ones.

"You know, he's not as bad your making him out to be. Sure he might try and scare you a little but he only wants me to be happy..." I trail off. A small smile tugs at the corner of my lips, bringing them up a fraction as my eyes dart down once again. Slowly, yet thoroughly I start picking the dirt from underneath my fingernails. "What do you think they're doing back home?" For a second I don't think he heard me but then he replies, "I want to say that everything is drastically different while we're away. But that's even far fetched for me." Gale states causing me to look up at him.

"True. Though I'm sure they miss us just the same-well our families and friends not the whole district-that'd be rather strange. My fathers probaby at his office working. My mo-I mean Peeta, is probably making some delicious treats. Gah, I miss those small strawberry cheese cakes-Peeta makes the best cheese cake, well besides his father... What do you miss most about home?"

"Well my family for sure and... and, well my large fan base." Gale jokes. Though a small smile touches my lips I can't help but feel dread pool in my stomach at Gale's paler complection. I force my mouth open and say "ah yes your doting fan girls. Do tell Mr. Hawthorne, what must your fan girls think about me?" My words hang in the air and instantly regret making the decision to open my mouth. Great going Madge, way too sound vapid.

"Madge," Gale's sweet gravelly voice calls out, startling me out of my internal battle. I pull in a shaky breath then fix my gaze with Gale's. His eyes are ablaze with something I can't quite figure out. He holds my gaze for a few moments in silence.

"I don't care about any other girl besides you." The intensity in his words and voice grip a hold of me tightly making me sick in a halted breath. Before swiftly throwing myself free from the confined heat of my sleeping bag and over to Gale. Where I waste no time and throw my arms around Gale's neck, pulling him close. Only to become overcome with tears. My fingers fist into his coat as a whimpered sob excapes from my lips. For a moment Gale stays ridged then in the next he's slowly moving his arms around me to return my hug.

"What's wrong Madge?"

"I just... What if we don't make it home Gale? I don't know how much long-I just want to go home and forget all this." My words are whispered lowly into his neck like I'm afraid for even myself to hear them. However, the tightening of Gale's arms around me lets me know that at least he heard me. "It's going to be fine Madge-we're going to be fine... I promose." Gale says lowly, every once in a while I feel his lips move against the top of my head.

"How cam you possibly promise that?" I question, pulling back from Gale to swipe at my tear stained face. My eyes move from one of his to the other waiting for a response. However, only getting a muffled groan of pain from his cracked parted lips. Once he's resting more comfortably he fixes me with a stern look of seriousness.

"When I make a promise I alway keep it. You can even ask Posey, she'd vouch for me."

"Isn't she a little bias, since you're her brother?"

"Nahh. I think that's besides the point." Gale says giving me smile that easily tears his lips some making hI'm wince with the discomfort. Before we're both desolated inot a small fit of laughter that leaves the air between us calm and comfortable. Which in turn has me smiling then scooting back against the wall next to Gale, letting my head hesitantly fall and rest on his shoulder, letting the silence stretch on and envelop us more.

I don't know how long we sit like that but the sudden heaviness of my eyelids has me bolting up causing Gale to look at me with bleary startled eyes. I blush letting my eyes drop to my fingers that are noted together in embarrassment of not realizing he was sleeping.

"Sorry... hey, why don't I get you a drink of water and maybe a little something to munch on?" I say, trying to immediately defuse the slight awkwardness from my embarrassment. In seconds I'm pushing myself up off the ground and hurdle towards our backpacks to retrieve one of the canteens. I make it all the way over to the canteens and am half way back to Gale when I hear and unmistakable sound of trumpets.

My eyes meet Gale's, almost on instinct. Then in the next nanotechnology second I'm bolting out of the cave to hear whatever news they're willingly giving us, canteen clutched tightly in my right hand as I run.

"Attention, attention! I have an announcement. I would like to bestow a feast for the last remaining tributes." Claudius Templesmith's voice rings out through the air, and immediately I shrug it off. Turning on my heels dejectedly. If all he can offer us is food then it's not important. Between the two of us, Gale and I are decent at hunting so we haven't really been having a problem.

I make it just to the opening of the cave when Claudius' voice rings out around me once again, "now hold on . Some of you may already be declining my offer. But wait, this is no ordinary feast. However, each of you need something desperately. And each of you will find that something in a backpack with your district number on it, at the Cornucopia at dawn. Think long and hard about refusing to show up. For some of you this could very well be your last chance."

His words linger in the air eerily, turning my stomach with the knowledge that there is definitely some Capital medicinema for Gale in our bag. As well as knowing that this is very much a tactic from Snow to no doubt kill me. I swallow, pulling in a low breath. My eyes dance aimlessly over the ground at my feet not seeing anything in the least. God knows how long Gale will hold out without that medicine and I don't think any of the other tributes are going to just up and decide to become suicidal so I'm really left with no option. I release a shaky breath then jump when Gale gently touches my shoulder drawing my attention to him finally. From the grave look on his face he must have heard the news as well. I open my mouth to try and discuss some type of plan to get the medicine for Gale from the Cornucopia. However, Gale speaks before I can.

"You're not going! You're not going to risk your life for me Madge."

"What? Who said I was even thinking about that-let alone you thinking you can stop me even if I were going to. You're hurt incase you some how forgotten."

"So you're going then?" He questions. His eyes darkening as he fixes me with a stern glare that don't seen too intimidating with his sheet white complexion, that does the complete opposite for him and hammers the last nail into the coffin of my decision to at least attempt in helping save Gale. Regardless of the consequences that might follow, I made the decision to come into these games to save him. And by god I will do it for as long as it takes, even if it has to cost me my life, than so be it.

Oh, don't be stupid Undersee! You're going to get yourself killed. It's the end of this conversation. You're not going and that's it!" Gale says finally. Trying to force me into submission with a heated angered glare that only seems to spark a fire inside me.

You're not the boss of me Gale! I can very well doing as I please, especially in here! Don't you for one moment foolishly let yourself believe I'm going to let you die infront of my eyes when I can save you. I know your not that stupid!"

He doesn't say anything and neither do I. We stand glaring at each other in silence, neither of us backing down.

"You're right," Gale replies. A faint smirk pulling at his lips as his eyes burn into me. I'm taken back by his words that for a moment I'm puzzled.

"And I can do whatever I want as well. Like follow you if you go-"

"Don't be an idiot, you wouldn't even make it. Your hurt Gale!"

"If your going, I'm going. At least partway. I may not make it all the way to the Cornucopia, but if I'm yelling your name, I bet someone can find me. And then I'll be dead for sure, he says. His eyes dancing with victory. I want to scream at him and maybe even punch him in his beautiful smug face. How dare he be so juvenile about this whole thing.

"If the tables were reversed, I know you would go there for me. Why can't I do this for you Gale? Why can't I help you, I'm not about to just let you die as I watch... Because if you're asking me to just sit her politely as I watch you die then you might as well just kill me where I stand." My words come tumbling out of my mouth as I feel panic and fear swell up inside of me, at just the thought of Gale's threat. Tears well up in my eyes and I angrily swipe at them. "Traitor" I can't help but think. My breathing now coming in faster.

"I won't die. I promise, I won't. If you just stay here with me, I promise I won't die."

A humorless laugh bubbles out of me as my tears finally fall down my cheeks. "How can you do that with out the medicine Gale?"

We're at standoff. Neither willing to back down. Gale looks from one of my eyes to the other then back again, before his tounge darts out and wets his cracked lips. His stare holding mine intently.

"If you don't go, I'll do whatever you say. I'll eat and drink when you too. I won't even complain, I promise. You just have to stay... Okay?"

I look at him and I know it's the best I can get out of him, and dejectedly deflate. Dropping his gaze momentarily then we're once again starting at each other.

"Fine. Then you need to go lay down." I put forth crossingmy arms over my chest challenging him to say otherwise. Instead of some snarky remark or even a glare, Gale nods giving me a small smile. Then he slowly walks back over to the sleeping bag, and makes a show of laying down, giving me a innocent wide eyed look of challenge of his own. I smile in satisfaction, though my chest feels tight with fear of all the things that could go wrong and get Gale killed, sans the leg wound.

I walk back into the cave, picking up my forgotten sleeping bag before swiftly making my way over to Gale and draping g it over him. The air around us had gone a thousand times colder. And as I glance at the entrance of the cave I take in the faint pinkining of the sun, telling of the fast approaching sunset. I bite my bottom lip subconsciously, my eyes finding Gale's gray eyes again.

"Thanks, Madge."

You're welcome. I'm going to go refill the canteen and scrape together something light for you to eat. So-um, just relax while I do that, okay?" I say. I stand there for a few seconds waiting to see what he'll say, so I can counter it if needed. However, to my surprise he stays silent and gives me a quick jerks of his head, though I do note that his jaw looks tense. With a final look at Gale I nod to myself. I clutch the nearly empty canteen in my left hand as my right swiftly pulls the the water treatment drops free from my backpack, as well as slinging the bow and the quiver full of arrows overy my sholder before secretly stiffin a knifew onto the waistbanc of my pants, just incase. Then I'm back on my feet and walking out of the cave.

I walk in a numb silence towards a small stream near our cave. All I can seem to think about is that he's going to die unless I can get that medicine from the feast. But Gale's stubborn ass won't let me do that without following me and threatening himself with other means of death anyhow.

When I know I'm a good distance away that Gale won't hear me, I let out a annoyed sigh. Trying to shake the thoughts from my head as I reach the stream, I crouch down and fill the canteen. Then I add the drops and the lid. Before I'm letting myself drop onto my butt, my eyes going to the darkening sky. On the verge of tears yet again. I want to laugh at the dramaticness of it, but then I remind myself how dire the situation is and I can't stop the tears that come unwantedly to my eyes and trickle down my cheeks. The cold air bows around me, and the wetness on my cheeks does nothing to help this.

All I want to do is curl up in a ball and cry. I want my father to swoop in and protect me like I always use to think he would, back when I was foolish and naive. Back before I knew the true horrors of the world around me. I sucking in a sob. My hands fly to my mouth, muffin the sound as much as possible as I let my head drop a fraction. But it's a fraction enough, to cause my hair to falk around my face like a curtain of slight privacy while I try to pull myself together and find a solution to keep Gale alive till the end of this treacherous game.

I'm so lost and absorbed I'm my grief I nearly miss the faint beeping sound coming from overhead. With tear blurred vision I look up and see a parachute dangling from a branch, just beeping and waiting for the taking. Like I'm on a mission I swiftly yank the bow and quiver from over my shoulder. Dropping them next to the canteen before depositing my knife next to them. Then in the next second in turning on my heels and hurriedly climbing up into the tree, with a tunneled vision for our sponsor gift.

Once I'm close enough to the parachute I spring at it. My fingers grasp around it just as my body tilts dangerously to the left. Taking my whole body off the branch of the tree. By the time I realize I should try to grab onto something, it's already too late. And I fall like a bag of rocks onto the hard ground of the earth. I state wide eyed as the branches over head, watching as the wind blew through the leaves, rustling them effortlessly as I try to stay calm as I wait for myself to catch my breath.

My eyes glass over with tears as I think about how defenseless I am right now. Stupid Madge. So stupid! Great going, using that brain of yours, I mentally scold myself. Wishing more than anything I had thought a little more before acting on pure panicked need. Of wanting to save Gale. To protect him, in any way posible.

When I manage to sick in a breath of air, I force myself to roll over. And on instinct I grab my knife, getting to my feet I hold it out in front of me. My eyes dart around me, trying to find any threats so I can eliminate them. When I come up empty I let out a relieved sigh ad my shoulders sag. With a last look around myself, making sure that I didn't miss any thing I quickly pace the knife back on the ground aND drop to my knees. My deft fingers fumble opening the parachute, only to freeze seeing the tiny vile. My stomach turns and I think I'm going to be sick, knowing that no way in hell would the amount in the vile be able to cure Gale.

"But, then what?" I think a loud. My eyebrows furrow in confusion as I gently unscrew the lid, bringing the vile up to my nose and take a sniff. The sickly sweet scent that meets my nose makes me want to cry and throw the vile and scream some obscenities at my godfather. But acting on logic, I quickly dip the tip of my finger into the vile and hesitantly put it into my mouth, only to frown at the familiar taste of sleep syrup. It's a common medicine here in distinct twelve, what with it being so cheap. But very addictive. Almost everyone has had a dose at one time or another. We have some in a bottle at home. My father uses it on nights he can't sleep.

As I stare at the vile a new sense of hope blooms in my chest as I realize that this vile is just enough to knock out someone as big as Gale and probably for around a full day or two. And that would help give Gale some healing time. "Thank you Haymitch!" I breath into the air, a smile stretching across my lips like a lazy cat stretching out on a hot day. With careful movements I recap the vile and gather my things only pausing once I realize that I need to outsmart Gale in order for him to take the syrup. I doubt he would do so freely, knowing what I have in mind while he's knocked out. With deft fingers I rip the fabric of the parachute off then glancing over at a nearby bush I am met with the sight of berries. The same berries that Rue, River, and I use to eat together. My heart constricks painfully in my chest as I think about my fallen allies. Of my lost friends and quickly I square my shoulders, kbowing that i cant let that happen to Gale as well. Pulling in a breath of conviction and exhaling my feelings of guilt, for going to be knowingly deceiving Gale. However, it's for his best interest that I get that medicine for him, or he will surely die.

Licking my lips I rush over to the bush of berries and swiftly strip the closes berries from it and drop them into the tin of the parachute. Once I'm happy with the amount of berries I have gathered I add in some mint leaves, trying to blend the mix enough that the sweet taste of the sleep syrup wI'll go unnoticed. I take in a steady breath before quickly uncapping the syrup and mix it all together. Silently praying that this works, and knowing if it doesn't than neither of us are leaving this game alive.

Once I'm satisfied with how well I mixed it all together I pull in a breath of strength and quietly whisper out, "please forgive me." Before walking back to the cave.

A fake smile forms on my lips the second I see Gale, he returns my smile with a small real one. That pulls at my heart strings, making the guilt in me rear it's ugly little head. I have to stay strong, not only for myself but for Gale.

"Good you listened," I tease as I gently place the bow and quiver full of arrows down, as well as my hidden knife. Before I close the distance between us, plopping down on the ground next to him, I give his shoulder a slight nudge. Making him roll his eyes, a weak chuckle passes through his lips, slicing any ounce of guilt from me.

"I found a small patch of berries off by the stream anf figured it would probably be easiest on your stomach if you ate berries, since you know they're basically juice." I say, looking down into the tin, noticing the lack of spoon. With a shake of my head I hurriedly get back to my feet and retrieve a spoon before returning to my seat beside Gale, who's eyes seem to stay locked on me.

I try to hide my nerves by making percice movements. I get a decent size bite ready for Gale on the spoon, bringing it to his closed chapped lips. It's like an eternity jammed into a breif second. He stares into my eyes, "thanks Madge." He grins. Opening his mouth obediently. I quickly ready the next bite. All the while watching as Gale swallows, a frown working it's way onto his face. "They're very sweet."

"Yeah. Only, because you're dehydration. When you regain more of your body's water weight back then things will start to taste right again." I find myself lying easily, like I'm back home in my role once more. I smile, poking the next spoon full into his mouth.

"I don't know," He says, almost puzzled. I gently force another bite into his mouth. Watching as he swallows, then frown becoming even more prominent on his face, before he licks his lips. Meeting my gaze with his questioning gray eyes.

"What kind of berries did you say these were?" He asks, another mouth full goes down. Just two more to go. I find myself licking my own lips, trying to battle down the little voice telling me that Gale knows. Another bite goes down easily, my eyes drop to the tin as I scrape the last bite onto the spoon. Forcing it into Gale's mouth.

"I didn't say... They're um-sweet berries. My maid always makes jam with them."

I watch in relief as Gale swallows down the last bite. Silently mulling over what I said. His eyebrows pinch even more together in confusion.

"They taste so sweet... sweet like-like syrup."

I'm riddled with guilt as I watch Gale's head snap up to min as the realization dawns on him. His gray eyes bore into me. And his mouth drops down into an 'o'. He jerks up, but I'm already throwing myself on top of him and quickly clamping a hand over his mouth as the other pressed across his broad chest. My elbow digging into his side as my long legs tangle with his trying to keep the uper hand as he tries to struggle from out underneath me.

We struggle for a little bit before is able to push me off of him. He tries to make himself vomit, but it's already too late. He's already losing consciousness. Even as he fades away, I can clearly see in his eyes, that what I've just done to him is unforgivable.

I sit back on my heels, staring at Gale's slack face. A mixture of sorrow and satisfaction bubble up in me. "I won't let you die Gale!" I say, even though he can't hear me. I guess it doesn't really matter either, the rest of Panem can.


	23. Chapter 23: Cornucopia Blood Bath

**_Chapter 23: Cornucopia Blood Bath_**

_*Author Note- I know, I know and I am incredibly sorry. I've just been in a weird place recently, not feeling like I matter or mean anything of significance to, really anything. I know how incredibly morbid, but hey I'm only human. A person I thought was my best friend has completely stabbed me in the back as well as some other unfortunate things have been plaguing me recently, and I've decided to not let it bother me any longer. So here I am once again :) I'm going to try my DAMN well hardest to update as much as I can and as soon as I can, I understand what it's like waiting for a story you like to continue onwards :) With out any further delay, I hope you enjoy. Please forgive any errors I've missed, and as always I would be more than happy to hear back form you all; whether it be a comment or a message :) xoxo -007twihunger_

I don't know how long I stay seated on my heels, just watching Gale's sleeping face intently. Trying subconsciously to ingrain his face in my mind. Fear billows up inside me, like a hungry fire, eating everything in its way. I'm afraid that we'll both die because of a mistake on my part. Like always the odds are not in my favor. the three other tributes are by far stronger than I am, as well as larger. Not to mention, that they are way more capable of killing than I am. But the next time I glance towards the entrance of the cave, I notice that the rain sounds as if it has picked up excessively, and doesn't show any sign of stopping any time soon. Probably President Snow, trying to flood Thresh out of the wheat field. The thought alone makes me smile as his smiling face pops up in my head, only to be quickly replaced by a frown with the reminder of why that would be. As well as the thought of Thresh getting any type of attack, whether it be from mutt of career; makes my stomach bottom out.

I lick my lips. My eyes swiping over Gale's slack face one last time, before I quickly dipping in and press a swift chaste kiss to Gale's cheek. When I pull back once more, I hastily get to my feet. With quick, quiet step I rush out of the cave. Only to pause a few feet away from the entrance. I squeeze my eyes shut tightly, heaving in the fresh air. Trying my damn hardest to not let my mind be overfilled with images of any ill filled thought. But, my will is too weak against my own thoughts as one after another I'm reminded of any type of friend I've made in here, of how they've all come to a bitter ending. Only because their association with me.

I stand, bent at the waist. My hands gripping tightly into the fabrics that cover my thighs as I try to fight down the bile that wants to spew out of my mouth. I gasp frantically (probably looking completely pathetic to all who are watching.) for air that is already there. My exhausted eyes burn as tears well up in them. My thoughts swirl in a dark storming fashion inside my head, getting darker and darker. Of thoughts about the no doubt close looming, gruesome death, of yet another friends. How would he go? Would if be slow and horrific or slow and painless? The only thought keeping me going forward, is that with it, whenever it may be. Gale and I will be that much closer to District 12 and whatever is awaiting me... If I even make it out of this hellhole.

With an angered growl, deep in my throat. I quickly snap up right, making myself instantly dizzy. But that doesn't stop me from stalking closer to the side of the cave and sending my fist forward into the hard rock of the caves wall. I stare in fascination at my shaking hand. My knuckles are tore slightly, and bleeding. However, all I feel is numbness. A small awed smile touches my lips as I flex my hand then try to shake out the warm flush that seems to flow through my right hand. I know I must look mad to all the people watching, and that seems to brighten my small smile until its bloomed into a full fledged grin. As I think maybe, just maybe Snow believes I am as well and that somehow he'll just leave Gale and myself alone; If we somehow end up winning with the odds even more stacked against us.

When I'm sure I won't puke and the throbbing in my hand disappears, I end up making myself busy with setting up a barrier of rocks in the entrance of the cave. Knowing I can't be here and protect a sleeping Gale as well as be at the Cornucopia, to retrieve Gale's medicine at the same time.

It's a tedious process, but after a lot of sweating and shifting things around, I'm pretty pleased with my work. And even more so, certain that no one will find Gale, while I'm away. That is, if anyone is searching for him.

The cave now appears to be apart of a large pile of rocks, like so many in the vicinity of the cave. However, if you knows where to look then you can find a crawling place, that leads into the cave. So Gale wont be entirely defenseless, like a sitting duck, if I end up not coming back. I stare unseeingly at the shadow, the light throws onto the wall of the cave as the sun continues to drop in the man-made sky.

My mind slowly starts to become overcome with panic, at the idea of having to wait any longer. Not knowing endure before his body just shuts down and dies. My eyes sweep over Gale's slumbering face, one more time. Before, flickering back towards the entrance of the cave.

If Cato or Clove, get a hold of me, than that's that. It will all have been for nothing and Gale will still die. I clear my tight throat roughly, trying to fight back my emotions, that want to take me under, like an undertow.

"I won't let that happen!" I think sternly.

Squaring my shoulders, I hastily gather all of the canteens we have as well as the water treatment droplets, and the bow and arrow to protect myself; in addition to keep me busy. Not wanting to let my poisonous thoughts start to eat away at the last bit of my sanity I have left.

Cautiously, I make my way to the steam near our cave. However, when I reach, it I frown seeing that it is now dried up. I swallow thickly, looking over my shoulder back at the cave. At where I know Gale is. I take a deep breath then quickly turn on my heels, stalking further into the woods, and unknown dangers to try and find us some water.

Gale won't survive if I don't make it back and especially if he awake even weaker, only to discover that any option of safe drinking water are all dried up. Then he will die for sure. The thought alone leaves a bad taste in my mouth. There is no other option for me other than to succeed. So that's just what I'll have to do. Knowing without a doubt, that I'm the last remaining factor at the moment fro District 12 having any chance at winning this years Hunger Games.

With quite, precise steps I cautiously I search around. Thankfully, after a short while of searching I find a still flowing stream. Swiftly I fill all four canteens and add three treatment droplets to them each. I sit with my knees pulled up to my chest, my arms wrapped tightly around them as if this small position can hold me together. I let my eyes stare into the sky. Watching the tree branches sway with the breeze as the rain pours down around me, though I can't help but not care in the least. Getting sick is the least of my worries while I am in here. The splatters of rain on my face feel good, just like the rain at home. If I just close my eyes I can pretend that, that is where I am. Sitting on my back steps of my house in District 12, wishing I was anyone else but me.

A rustling in a near by bush has me sitting stiffly. my eyes immediately snap to the bush, as my breath catches in my throat. My eyes are wide and searching of any threat. My left had is grasped around the bow that lays on the ground next to me, while my right hand slowly inches towards an arrow to notch on the bow. Trying as hard as I can to remain soundless. However, before I ca notch an arrow in the bow, a small grey rabbit bounds out of the bush. Its small pink nose scenting the air, in search for any threats that might be around. I hold my breath watching as it slowly scampers about, deciding nothing is amiss. I watch silently as it starts to nibble on some low hanging leaves from another bush. My hand with the bow slowly raises until its finally notched. Swallowing nervously, I take aim at the unsuspecting animal and then let the arrow loose. Letting it embed its self into the rabbits neck. Causing the rabbit to twitch slightly, and for me to fling myself in the opposite direction as vomit rushes up my throat and out my mouth, like a dam breach. I do this for a few minutes until I'm reduced to dry heaving and an ungodly raw throat. Swiping my sleeve covered arm across my mouth to erase any puke on my lips. I let my eyes dart back over to the rabbit as I push myself up from the earth.

With deft fingers I retrieve the rabbit and remove the arrow from it, wiping the blood away on the leg of my pants before putting it back into the quiver. Gather my things, I quickly situate them before retrieving the canteens, only to pause as I see a decent size fish swimming along the stream. Without a thought, I walk along the stream my eyes not moving away from the pink and grey fish. I lick my lips and notch another arrow and pray I stay true to my form and let go, once I'm sure of my aim. What feels like forever happens in a matter of seconds. Firstly, I hold my breath watching the arrow wiz through the air and impale the fish through, pausing its swimming permanently. I can't help but smile with triumph at my hit. Pride swelling up inside me. "Take that Katniss!" I think, my smile slowly slips from my face leaving me void of any expression as numb confusion consumes me at the mere thought of my supposed friend. Shaking my head to clear it of thoughts, I hop over the stream to get closer to the fish to retrieve it. Getting my sleeve wet in the process. Bounding back over the stream, I turn tail and head back to the cave, gathering some leaves, small branches, and twigs as I go.

When I return back to the cave, the rain is still pouring all around me. Making me have to make a small covered area to effectively start a fire, to cook our haul. I let the small fire warm my frigid body as I descale and debone the fish, before skewing it over the fire to roast, while I skin the rabbit. I'm happy for the thorough attention I need to pay attention to the tasks at hand, because that means I don't have to get dragged down with my poisonous thoughts that seem to always be swarming in my brain.

By the time I'm finished cooking, both the fish and rabbit. I am uncontrollably shaking from the cold that seems to have embedded its self into my very bones, causing my teeth to chatter nosily; and even on occasion of accidentally biting into my tongue. Hastily, I make my way into the cave. Swiftly I unpack myself and even faster eat the small portion of fish and rabbit leg I gave myself, in favor of saving most of the haul for Gale. Not knowing if I'll even make it back to him once I leave for the Cornucopia just at day break.

After I'm done eating, I feel slightly ill from the larger meal I've had, that I'm no where near use too now. With numb shaky hands I quickly disrobe out of my soaked coat and pants, leaving them to hang over our two backpacks as I quickly scoot into the warmth of the sleeping bags with Gale. Pressing my back right up against his front trying to leech some of his heat into myself. In order to stop the chattering of my teeth as well as the violent shakes that seem to rattle my bones.

Staring towards the entrance of the cave, where the light from the moon shines in slightly. My mind wanders to think about what my father and Peeta must now think of me. Do they think I'm just as ruthless as the careers? Or maybe just a scared girl trying to get home, as well as save her fellow tribute? Both thoughts leave me feeling slightly ill. Then the handsome face of Finnick, pops in my mind. Drawling my attention immediately. I can't help but worry my lip thinking about what troubles Snow has already unleased on my already fragile friend from District 4. He doesn't have much to loose, and I'm absolutely positive President Snow must know this as well. I gulp thinking about the sweet red haired, frazzled girl, praying that she will remain unharmed; and knowing it has to be her or what he has left of his family, that will end up suffering for Finnick's disregard to the rule, so he could relay the message of my mothers passing. I swallow down a sob that wants to bubble to the surface. Knowing I'll never get to see or speak to her again, as her daughter. I can't even say if she even remembered me in her remaining minutes of life, or if she was still blinded with my similarities towards her dead sister she insists I was.

I want to scream and cry, but most importantly I want to run off and hide. I know how pathetic and cowardice it sounds, but its the truth and I already know even that wouldn't help. President Snow has a funny way of doing that. Of finding anyone he wants at any time, no matter what. And I've grown accustom to not doubting him, especially knowing all I do about the behind the workings; thanks to my fathers position even though he was none the wiser of me reading over some of his reports, every once in a while... Well whenever I can stomach it.

I force my mind to think about the positive the games will have on Gale and I both. The divide between town and the seam, won't matter to us anymore once were victors. A small smile pulls the corners of my lips up. I forcefully ignore the pooling sense of dread that seems to linger in my gut. However, I ignore it in favor of thinking about how I won't be all alone anymore. Not that I was really ever completely alone with Peeta or from the monthly letters Finnick sends, along with small presents from Annie.

I can't help but hope and pray that everything will work out for the better, as well as that maybe for once I won't be a pariah anymore. That the whispers and heated hateful glares won't get targeted at me, but something inside me tells me to hope for the best and to expect the worst. Though, I can't help but put all my figurative eggs in one basket. I've never had this much hope for the future ever, and now its intertwined with Gale.

Looking back over my shoulder at Gale, my smile slips from my lip as I stare at his even paler complexion. My eyes trailing over his sweat ridden brow as my bottom lip becomes ensnared between my teeth. The heat radiating off him almost feels like it burns my skin that touches him but I don't move away from him. I can't, I'm paralyzed with fear. Just seconds ago the future seemed so bright and now, I'm not too entirely sure if he'll make it through the night; let alone however long these games have left.

"I won't let you die, I promise!" I whisper into the air, my words getting drowned out by the heavy pitter patter of the falling rain outside.

With a swift kiss placed to his burning cheek, I turn back over and try to rest as much as I can, without sleeping. In fear that I'll miss the feast. And if that happens than Gale is for sure a goner.

The air around me is so frigid, that I make no move to scoot away form Gale's scorching body, instead I scoot closer. Feeling his heavy chin rest on the top of my head. The air is so cold around us, no doubt from the Gamemakers sending a man-made cold front throughout the arena. There are a few things I'm sure of, the first, is that this is the farthest that our District has come to winning in a very long time... Hell since Haymitch's game in the quarter quill. Second, that two of the three tributes left want to kill me in a very personal and probably viciously slow manner. And lastly, I am the only person from District 12 that is the deciding factor if we both die or by somehow win. I'm praying for the latter with all my might.

Through the crack in the rock formation I've made, I can keep watch of the time passing, albeit at a sluggish pace. Causing me to start to drift off on more than one occasion. After a while of this, I decide that the sun shall be rise in a few hours, give or take a few. Cautiously I untangle myself from Gale, as well as the sleeping bags. With a lump in my throat I quietly and thoroughly start gather a few things for me to take with me on my small journey to the Cornucopia and stuff them into Rue's small pack. Ignoring the sting of tears in my eyes as my fingers graze over some dried blood from her last moments. I take a canteen for myself, leaving the other three for Gale, just in case things come to the worst. I also leave him the bow and arrows, knowing he's by far a better shot than I am. Instead I decide to take the two knives for myself; one gets stuffed into the small pack as the other gets stuffed into the waist band of my pants. I leave what medical supplies and food we have left with Gale as well, deciding I can just munch on some berries if it come to that. They're easy to find and I rather like them, since they remind me fondly of home.

I'm about to leave when I pause at the entrance of the cave. I suck in a breath, not sure if I'm trying to force myself to be more like Katniss, hard and calculating, or rather if I'm just trying to comfort myself into believing this is going to come together as I hope it will. With a slow glance around the cave, my eyes come to rest on Gale. A knot forms in my throat making my throat feel clogged with emotions. Fear wells up in me at the idea of never seeing his hard handsome face again, that if I slip up and mess up at that feast than that's is it for him. Squaring my shoulders I shake the traitorous thoughts from my head. Before I'm aware of my own actions, I diminish the space between us and press a swift, chaste kiss to Gale's clammy forehead. A few tears slip loose and glide down my cheeks as I stare at him, "I'll be back... I'll get the medicine and then I'll come back and fix you right up... You... You, just have to hold on a little while longer Gale. Please don't die." I whisper into the still morning air, before quickly spinning around and hurriedly making my way through the small crawl space and on my way to the unknown.

The air is colder outside the cave, making my breath visible in small white puffs of clouds. I make my way toward the Cornucopia as quiet and as swift as I can. Making sure I keep my feet light and noiseless as possible. I keep to my trail wanting to be sure I don't get lost, since I definitely don't have time to get lost. The night vision goggles, I've used with River and Rue, had been all but forgotten in my pack; now sit now perched on my nose. Giving me perfect sight in the darkness around me. Even though I can see, there seems to be a sense of impending doom hovering around me. I'm not sure if its form worry or some higher being trying to tell me of my impending doom. However, this doesn't deter me in the least.

I know I have to win, if not for Gale and his family or mine; than for my fallen allies. Their deaths will not be in vain, if I have anything to do with it.

Along the way, I don't see any sign of any other tributes. Not a snapping of twigs under foot, of puffs of breath. Nothing at all, and this fills me even more with apprehension. The closer I get to the Cornucopia the more I start to fear I heard wrong, that maybe the feast was being held somewhere else. However, I swear I can remember Claudius Templesmith specifically saying the Cornucopia. So I ignore my fears a walk cautiously onward.

When I finally reach the Cornucopia the sun is just beginning to make its way further in the sky, glinting off the gold dome of the Cornucopia. As well as illuminating a large split in the ground, where a long silver table rises to ground level. My eyes roam over the table, taking in the three bags that lay spread out on. District 2's bag looks to contain something very large; where as District 11's bag i a nice medium size. Leaving the last small bag to belong to District 12. The pack looks small enough that I'll be able to stuff it into Rue's pack or even I can tie it to my wrist without much to fuss over. I swallow thickly. My eyes glance around the open area, trying and failing to see any of the other tributes as well as of any possible threat the Gamemakers might try and sick on me.

"You got this Madge! You can do this! You have to di this for Gale!" I think. My heart now beating frantically in my ears as I sweep my eyes over the clearing once more. With a sigh of resignation, I swiftly get to my feet from behind the bush, where I was crouched behind. Knowing if Cato or even Clove get to that table before me than there is no doubt in my mind they will also scoop up my pack as well.

With out hesitation, I sprint for the table. Pushing myself to run as fast as I can. I can almost hear Haymitch saying, "That's it Pearl, you've got this!"

Just as I near the table a sickening sharp pain slices into my right calf, causing me to scream out in pain and fall forward into the hard earth. I hit the ground hard, bouncing from the force of my speed a few time before I come to a stop. As I regain myself, I quickly tug up my pant leg to reveal a dagger imbedded in it, which causes me to release an uncontrollable whimper from me. As my blood slows from the rushing and pounding in my head, I hear the distinct sound of pounding feet on the soil. Someone is running, and right for me. I look up too late and am hit by a blur of raven hair and a boney, yet strong body of Clove.

We struggle with each other, both of us trying to get the upper hand. My hand slips on holding her arm away from me as she tries to slam it down at me, sinking another knife into where ever she can manage. And just like that she slices into my collar bone easily like its warm butter. This causes me to release another piercing scream as tears swim in my eyes. My hands fly up towards her face and I begin to claw at her, which makes her move back away from my assault and this is enough of an opening I have to slam my right fist into her jaw knocking her just enough off of me that I'm able to wiggle my legs from underneath her. As well as try to half scramble, half crawl away from her. However, I don't make it too far before my hair is being yanked hard backwards and my face is sent down crushing into the hard earth. I wheeze as I feel her try and straddle me once again. But, I don't cease my frantic attempt, at getting free trying anything to get as far away from her a I can.

I can taste a mixture of grainy dirt and coppery blood in my mouth. Clove slams into me again. However, this time its with her shoulder, and effectively smashes my face back into the ground. I feel a jagged rock slice against the right side of my face, sending more pain through my already riddled body. Before I can try to push myself back up some, Clove swiftly sends a hard punch to my side that renders me breathless.

She releases a psychotic laugh as she yanks me over roughly, straddling my waist in no time then shifting so her knees pin my shoulders down, then she's poising another knife into the junction of my neck and jaw. I stare up at her as I try unsuccessfully to catch my breath. Not knowing what she may do to me, now that I am literally a sitting duck.

"This is it." I can't help but think. My eyes well up with the pain of lack of oxygen. I can only pray that my father and Peeta aren't watching, knowing my death will be harder on the two of them than anyone else I use to call friend. I can tell by the glint in Clove's eyes that she mean to savor every second of this and I think that scares me more than my death. I dart my eyes around quickly and can't help but be glad I don't see Cato anywhere, I know I would rather deal with her than him. Maybe, he is out scouting for Thresh and Gale while Clove went and got their bag.

"Where's lover boy? Off sulking in some ditch?" Clove asks, a smirk plasters on her thin lips. Her eyes holding mine in a steady gaze.

Like a rush, fresh air fills my lungs. And with this new change of events I do the only thing I can think of, which is to keep her talking for as long as I can. If we keep talking than I live for a little bit longer.

"Nope, he's out there hunting for Cato!" I snarl at her, then to add to it I quickly scream out, "Gale!"

Once again I am rendered gasping for air, as Clove throws a boney punch into my windpipe, effectively releasing any air I had in me as well as cutting my voice off. But, she does swiftly look around her. A look of uncertainty and fear gracing her features. And even though it's for a short second, I know that she believed I was telling the truth.

"Liar," she says with a sinister grin.

"He's probably off somewhere dying. He couldn't possible trust someone like you to do a job like this. You're too weak princess."

Gale's snide nickname for me sounds deathly wrong coming from her mouth. A shiver runs down my spine as her eyes take me in as if I'm some type of prize and I guess from all the trouble I've caused her, I guess I am.

"Now, I wonder what's in you bag. Medicine maybe for Lover boy?" Clove taunts.

"here, hold this for me would you?" she purrs. A scary glint shining in her eyes as her smile grows wider. Then the next thing I know Clove stabs the knife she is holding into upper thigh. My eyes widen in pain and an inaudible screams leaves my mouth as tears brim my eyes. Pain is the only thing I can think about as Clove shifts above me, opening her jacket to show a wide arrangement of different sizes of knives. My vision seems to swim with dizziness, that I'm not able to move at all. I lay limply on the ground wishing more than anything I at least had my breath back.

I watch as she runs her fingers over the handles, like she's not sure which one to use first. After a moment she carefully selects a smaller knife, one with a cruel looking jagged, curved blade. "I promised Cato that I'd let him have you." She says. Then she gives a show of looking around us. "But, since its just us... I think he'd understand that I just couldn't help myself. But that doesn't mean we can't give the audience a show now, does it? I can always let him have lover boy, that is if the elements and his wound won't do him in beforehand." She muses.

Slowly my breathing seeps back into me, and air fills my lungs; making it slightly better for me in these unfortunate position I'm in. I'm not sure if I should try and unseat her again or try and wait for an opening to get out from underneath her, neither option sounds too good to me. But, I don't have much I can do about it that might change it.

"I'm going to kill you, then we're going to kill lover boy and the boy from eleven; just like we did with your little friends. What were their names?" she says.

"Ah, yes. River and Rue, was it?"

I know her words are meant to get under my skin and unsettle me, and I can't help but to play into her hand as a vail of anger obscure my entire being. Without a second thought I start to buck against her. My hands gripping at her trying to tip her off of me so I can go in for the kill. But, she's too heavy for me to move, and instead I only seem to amuse her which infuriates me to no end.

"Now where shall we start?"

I lay trapped underneath the vicious girl from District 2, watching helplessly as she surveys my face, tilting it to side to side as if its a block of wood and she's trying to decide what to carve into it. In a lame attempt I try to bite at her hand, but miss. She grabs a fist full of my blond hair roughly, jerking my head back to give her better access to my neck, which strikes fear inside of me. "I think..." she trails off a smile once again pulling at her lips making my stomach drop in both fear and disgust. "I think we'll start with that pretty little mouth of yours that can't help but to keep spitting lies." My eyes widen a fraction more as I clamp my mouth close, trying to keep my lips from her as she trails the tip of the blade against my face. Dragging it ungodly slow down from my cheek towards my lips, where she traces the outline of my lips.

I won't close my eyes and bow down to her, no matter the circumstances. The comment about River and Rue, has filled me with a burning fury. Enough fury to at least die with some dignity. As my last act of defiance, I work up a mouth full of saliva, mixed with the blood and dirt that still cake my mouth, and spit it at her face as I continue to stare her down. I watch as she flushes with her own anger, her jaw clenching as she swipes the mess with her sleeve. "Alright then, lets get started. Shall we?" I brace myself for the pain and agony, I'm sure will follow with her blades slicing into my flesh. But as I feel the tip open the first cut at my lips, I swiftly yank the knife from my thigh loose ignoring the pain and stabbing it into her hip. And as she moves to lung at me and retaliate, her weight is lifted off of me. For a moment, I'm too stunned to realize what's happening. But then I hear her screaming, and I swiftly scramble up to my feet. Has Gale somehow come to rescue me? Pulling the blade from my calf, I stare at where Clove dangles in front of Thresh, who has a good grip on her throat. I can't help but let out a small gasp seeing Clove like this dangling helpless under a towering Thresh, looking like a flimsy ragdoll.

I watch in a paralyzed state as Thresh yanks Clove around. Before throwing her to the ground. When he speaks I jump slightly, never having heard him raise his voice. "What did you do to that little girl? You killed her?"

Clove is scrambling backwards on all fours, too shocked to even call out for Cato. "No! No, it wasn't me! I swear!"

"You said her name! I heard you. You killed that little girl and little boy!" Another thought, brings a fresh wave of rage to his already dark features, making him look nothing like the boy, I've come close to in these games. "Did you cut her up like you were going to cut up this girl?"

"No! No! No, I-I... I-no..." Cloves eyes drop to Thresh's hand, where a stone the size of a loaf of bread is grasped tightly in his fist and looses it. "Cato!" She screeches. "Cato!"

"Clove!" I hear Cato's answering scream of reply. However, he sounds too far away to do any good for Clove. He must have been searching around for any tributes he could find while Clove made a run for their supplies in that large bag. Thresh brings the rock down hard, crashing it against Clove's temple, its not bleeding but its hard to miss the large dent in the side of her skull. The sound of her crunching skull will forever be ingrained in my brain, if I don't die here today. There is still some life in Clove. I watch as she chest slowly rises and falls as small pained moans make there way through her slightly parted lips. Before Thresh puts her out of her misery with a final smash of the rock to her skull again.

Then the next thing I know, Thresh is whirling around to stare at me. Out of reflex I take a cautious step backwards, my eyes no doubt the size of saucers. "I won't kill you for her, and that's the only reason!" Thresh growls angrily at me. However, his eyes convey the opposite. I nod my head, not knowing for sure if its true or just words for the audience, to keep us both safe from any backlash. "Don't let me see you again. You got that Madge?" he demands, his watery eyes searching mine to make sure I understand him. I lick my lips and swallow thickly and nod my head jerkily. Conflicting emotions swarm inside me as I stare at my once alley. Wishing more than anything that he could go home as well but knowing he can't if Gale and I want to make it back to District 12.

"Clove!" Cato cries out in anguish. I can tell by the sound of his voice that he's close and that he surely see's her dead body on the ground between Thresh and myself, still slightly twitch from time to time.

"You better run, Girl on fire." Thresh says, in a softer voice. Still not like he use to talk to me but in no way is it near the anger laced voice he used, just moments ago. I give him a small smile before swiftly turning on my heels and darting for the table, where I waste no time before I grasp the small bag labeled with a black 12 on it. I wrap the holding strap of the bag around my wrist a couple times, not wanting it to come loose as I make a mad dash back towards the cave and Gale.

"Good luck," I say. My feet pounding hard against the ground as I propel my self forward even faster. When I reach the tree line, I chance a quick glance back, to see Thresh running off towards the wheat field with not one, but two bags in his hands. I smile knowing that if Cato wants that bag then he will have to venture out into Thresh's territory. I watch in slight surprise as Cato crouches don next to Clove, spear in his hand as he pleads her to stay with him. I know in a moment or two he will realize its futile and she can't be saved.

Without anymore wasted time, I continue sprinting into the woods, getting myself further and further away from the angered boy from District 2. Not even wanting to think about what he'll do to me if he got his hands on me. I can hear the distant booming of a cannon, signaling Clove's death. I press myself to run faster knowing Cato must be after one of us now. The only thing keeping me sane is the fact that Thresh has Cato's bag as well as that I have medicine that will surely save Gale's life. My pace is pretty great considering I'm in excruciating pain from my battle wounds from Clove. I can feel wetness leaking thoroughly through my clothes, where I've been stabbed. I just grit my teeth and pretend its one of my old training track sessions, ignoring the pain and pressing myself further on.

As I reach the familiar stream I caught a fish in yesterday, I finally let a sliver of hope bubble up inside me. Choosing to ignore the fact that I'm stumbling more now and that I feel slightly lightheaded as well as the fact that I'm pretty positive I've lost a little too much blood. But, I know I'm close to Gale. I'm closer than I've ever been in saving his life. I try to force myself to think about how happy Hazel, Rory, Vic, and little Posy must be that I'm going to save Gale. Though, the latter probably doesn't quite understand what's going on. "That's my Pearl, not just a pretty face. But, a fighter." I can hear Haymitch's words as if he were next to me beaming drunkenly at me. My thoughts all come to a halt as I bound over a large rock, and manage to clip it with the toe of Glimmer's shoes that are entirely too big for my feet. I fly forward, roughly smacking back into the hard earth as I'm now use to doing. My vision swims as my head slaps hard into the side of a rock, causing my vison to swim even more. I gasp weakly, forcing my eyes to open and only manage to get them to flutter a few times before staying open.

There in front of me, just a few meters or so is the cave, there is not doubt in my mind about it. With a grimace on my face, I shove myself up from the ground. The side of my head feels damp and I'm almost sure I'm bleeding even more. But, with that cave so close to me I can't seem to make myself care in the least.

By somehow I make it back to the cave, and after squeezing through the small crawl space. I don't waste anytime before untying the bag I've nearly died to retrieve. The bag contains one slim box, that holds one hypodermic needle. Without hesitation, I scamper over to Gale and jam the needle into his arm, slowly pressing the plunger until all of the medicine is gone from the needle. Sitting back on my heels I let the needle fall to the ground with a small clatter. I shakily raise my hand and press my fingers to a nasty feeling gash on the side of my head, my fingers feel slick and wet. And when I pull then back down to see, I see that they're covers in ruby red blood. The harsh color contrasts against my pale skin. Then heavily my hand drops into my lap. The last thing I remember is an extremely beautiful blueish black butterfly, landing on the curve of my wrist.


	24. Chapter 24: Preparations and the final 3

_**Author Note- Hey guys, I know it's been awhile. I've but honestly I have been trying to upload this chapter for a while, but my dumb laptop it being a menace! Literally it has already deleted this chapter three times and had decided to not to hook up to the internet for gosh I don't even know how long lol. But for gosh sakes I've finally uploaded it :) Thankfully! I'm sorry it took sooooo darn long, but if it was up to me it would have been uploaded a long while ago. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter. I am as we speak writing the next chapter :) I tried to lengthen this one a bit to make up for the long wait. Once again I apologies for the wait, I know how it feels waiting for a story you completely enjoy ready lol. Well I guess I've gabbed on long enough. I hope you guys enjoy and continue to read my little story, in addition I was extremely curious if you all would be interested in a second book of this series like catching fire but obviously different lol, let me know in a comment or a message, whatever floats your boat. Once again I hope you all enjoy this chapter; feel free to comment and message me with any feedback. I love you guys and thank you immensely for reading my book, it means more than you'll know. Thank you and enjoy. Also excuse any mistakes I might have missed :) xoxo -007twihunger**_

**Chapter 24:****Preparations and the Final Three.**

The unmistakable sound of birds chirping, mixed with the low drumming of rain fall has me scrunching my face up. I try to force myself back to sleep for as long as I can before Gertrude decides its time for me to wake up. My fuzzy, sleep ridden mind slowly sifts through ideas, as to why she even bothered to let me sleep this long. Possibly I'm sick once again, it happens each fall; so this one shouldn't come as a surprise. Though, I can't seem to place being outside for any lengthy time, or rather being around a sick Mellark brother. Releasing a defeated sigh, and just realizing that there is no way I'm going to be able to fall back to sleep with my mind already awake and running.

Blinking open my eyes, I suck in a startled gasp. Flinging myself up into a sitting position I let my eyes trail around the dank looking cave. My head aches with pain from sitting up so abruptly causing me to squeeze my eyes shut for a fraction of a second. With furrowed eyebrows I look once again look around at the dank cave, the events of the past few days come crashing back to me like a wave.

"Hey, be careful! Take it easy Madge." Gale's gruff voice, commands from my left as his gentle, yet heavy hand hesitantly rests on my shoulder. His touch is so gentle that its like he's afraid to touch me, as if I were made of glass and might break from even a slight breeze blowing against me in the opposite direction. I open my mouth to ask him about what I've no doubt missed while I was passed out. However, the tightness of my dry throat only allows me to release a pathetic squeak that makes the tips of my ears and my cheeks burn with a blush. Gale gives me a puzzled expression, before his face tints with a flush of embarrassment as his face dawns with realization. Then he is swiftly gets to his feet to retrieve a canteen, which he thrusts out towards me. Without hesitation, I quickly take the canteen and unscrew the lid then downing all the water in a matter of seconds.

I gasp once I'm done, as my eyes find Gale's, and I smile at him with gratitude. "Thanks." I put forth in a low voice, but I know he can hear me.

"Yeah-no problem, it's the least I can do." Gale reassures. He turns his head, trying to hide the new blush on his face. I like this new found comradery between the two of us. For once in my life I don't feel so much like an unnecessary add on.

"So... Um-I... What exactly happened after I passed out?" I awkwardly say.

I watch as Gale keeps his face turned away from me as he begins to rub at the back of his neck. For a few seconds I think he's not going to answer my question. However, in the next moment, he turns to look me square in the eyes. His dark eyebrows clash together in confusion, as he seems to have an internal battel with himself then in the next moment he's stoned face once more.

"That was a real stupid thing to do Madge. Real stupid! But, I'm glad you did it. I wouldn't... I wouldn't have... Just thanks for being so stupidly brave. It means a lot to me, to my family..." He hastily says. His deep gray eyes look from one, to the other of my eyes then back again. Before he drops his gaze altogether, as well as releasing a small sigh.

"Madge... You-When I woke up I found you passed out on the ground, in front of me. You were lying in a rather horrifyingly large pool of blood. I thought... I thought, that you were dead. That you died because you risked your life for me. That was a day and a half ago... I patched your wounds up as much as I could, but I'm no healer. Mrs. E, could have done a better job, if she was here." He says with a small shake of his head as if he was bewildered by my actions.

I look down at my lap, knotting my fingers together. Letting the hair that has come loose from my hair tie, fall and block my face like a vail. "I had to do something, Gale. I couldn't just sit here and watch you slowly waste away. I saw my chance and took it, and I'm not sorry I did it. If I had waited any longer, who knows what could have happened to you. I could honestly careless if I was hurt, as long as your okay, then it was all worth it."

He doesn't respond and this causes my stomach to flip and flop about. I can feel his eyes burning into me, making my skin flush in embarrassment of being stared at so intently by him. With a inaudible sigh, I look up at him and am immediately pinned to my spot. Not being able to move if I wanted to. His gaze is far too intent and demanding, and I'm far too weak to fight it. One second he's just sitting there staring at me in wonder, then in the next he's lunging at me. Grabbing a hold of the back of my neck, Gale presses his lips to mine harshly. Immediately I fist my hands into the back of his shirt pulling him closer, even though I'm pretty sure its not possible from how hard we're already pressed against each other.

Gale, gently pushes me back so I'm once again laying on the makeshift bed, as he hovers closely over me as our lips staying fused together, throughout the exchange. His lips are hard and hungry against mine. Screaming in silence, of the need only my lips seem to be able to cure. I cannot help but smile into the kiss as I think about all the girls back home, and how jealous they all must be of me right now. I wish I could see their faces now that Gale is with me.

"What's so funning Undersee?" Gale asks huskily, breaking away from my lips. I watch as his eyes dance from wanting to look into my eyes and wanting to stare at my bruised lips, creation of one Gale Hawthorne.

I slowly sit up and Gale follows, not looking away from me. "I was just thinking about the girls back home," I find myself whispering to Gale, who lets loose a booming laugh that makes my chest warm. He swipes at his forehead before dragging his fingers through his unruly hair. "Well, it looks like I'm doing a shit job kissing you then, huh?" He jokes, knocking his shoulder playfully into mine. He gives me a small smirk that gradually turns into a wince that he quickly tries to mask. However, I've seen it and it leaves a funny feeling throughout me. Gale pulls me close to him, wrapping his arm around my shoulder and forcing my head to rest against his shoulder as he rests his head against the top of my head.

"Believe me, Madge when I say this. You really don't need to worry about those girls from back home... You honestly, don't have to worry about anyone..." He trails off. The fingers of his left hand absentmindedly draw small shapes and designs on my side. As we let the comfortable silence engulf us.

His words leave me reeling in a strange type of high I've never experienced before; one that easily heats me from my head all the way down to my toes. I've never had anyone care about me, how Gale now care about me. And I don't want them too. Never in my life did I think I would be this lucky, to be the girl that Gale Hawthorne wanted more than anything. In the back of my mind I picture Katniss. My once friend and, Gale's hunting partner slash best friend. I had always thought that one day they would awkwardly come together, and I don't think I was the only one in District 12 who thought that. Even to an outsider you could tell that Gale liked Katniss, more than just a friend. While Katniss on the other hand could think of nothing more than taking care of little Primrose. And I guess that's understandable with how distant their mother was after the death of their father. However, it was still factual knowledge, or so I had thought for years.

Thinking about Katniss, I can't help but feel sorrow burn up inside me. What will things be like between the two of us once, Gale and I return home from these games? Will she ignore me just like she did the day I was reaped, or will she come and give her apologizes about not wanting to root for anyone other than her best friend? Will she hate me for coming in between her and Gale's future, or maybe Peeta finally made a move to express the love he's always felt for the scowling raven haired girl I once called friend?

So many thought plague me that I don't notice when Gale pulls away from me. However, when our eyes meet its hard to think of anything other than this strong man in front of me. He looks at me like one would look at a injured animal, and whose to say I don't look just that.

"What all happened at the Cornucopia Madge?" He pulls, his face not revealing anything he might be thinking or even feeling. I lick my lips and swallow. My eyes glance away from him then back again.

"Well-uh... I. I waited for a little while, just watching but I didn't see anyone, so I ran for the table containing the three bags. Clove... She-well, she came out of nowhere. She threw a knife at the back of my leg... It stabbed into me and I fell from the pain-I wasn't expecting it. We fought, her and I. Though, that didn't last long. You remember how she was in the training center... She knocked the wind out of me and I just laid there, ready to die-I guess... She stabbed another knife into me-my thigh this time. And then she was saying how she was going to give the audience a show, of carving me up. She almost killed me, if not for Thresh. He came up and saved me, he grabbed her up and then... Then he was hitting her with a rock-he smashed her head in. She was saying these awful things about River and Rue... and... He heard-he saved me. He had to do it-he saved me because I was protecting Rue, and I killed Marvel because he... Thresh told me to go and that he was only sparing me for Rue. He took off with Cato's bag into the wheat field-and, well I grabbed our bag and took off to save you..."

I don't realize I'm crying until Gale pulls me into a tight embrace. I cling to him as I burry my face into his neck, letting my tears fall. Letting myself express the fear I had felt of almost dying in those moments I was trapped with Clove. Gale doesn't say a thing, just hold me tighter as new sobs wrack my body.

"I just want to go home, Gale. I don't want to be here anymore. I just want to go home." I sob out.

"I know Madge, I want to go home too. We're going to be there before you know it, okay? I promise I'll get you home."

A soft thud against the entrance off the cave has the both of us jumping in surprise. In a matte of seconds, Gale's stalky, yet muscular body is in front of me in a protective stance. A knife banished in his outstretched right hand. I can't see his face with his back towards me. However, I know it must be a mixture of calculation and determination plastered on it. Without a moments more of hesitation, Gale gets to his feet and quickly rushes over to the crawling space at the entrance of the cave. I watch paralyzed with fear as he crouches down then swiftly sticks his head out then he's pulling it back in to give me a look of amazement. Before, he moves his whole body through the crawling space.

My breath is caught in my throat, as I stare wide eyed at the crawling space waiting for Gale's reappearance. And he doesn't leave me to stew in apprehension for long. In a matter of seconds I see Gale crawling back through the cave, a metal domed looking basket being dragged centimeters behind him. My mouth drops open and I can't help but scramble to my feet and fling myself at Gale. He releases a low grunt as I slam into him, my arms going around his neck as I finally realize I'm shaking. I hadn't realized how scared I was that Gale could have been hurt, by some trick up Cato's sleeve. My eyes are misty and my heart is pounding rapidly in my chest.

"I thought..." I trail of. There is no doubt in my mind that if anything happened to Gale, I wouldn't be able to leave this game ever. Even if I did somehow make it out, I'd always be trapped in this game going over his death as well as the others; of all that I could have done to save him, and all my friends.

"Hey, its okay Madge, I'm fine-everything's okay, I promise."

I know I must seem like a complete fool. And, I guess these games have made me that way, afraid of everything and anything. I'm cracking just like Annie did, and I don't seem to be able to stop it in the least. Hesitantly, I move back from him. Our eyes meet at once, concern is etched in his gray eyes. I know he must think I'm crazy, just like how everyone thinks Annie is. I open my mouth then close it, my eyes falling to my feet. Not knowing what to do or say to defuse this situation. When all of a sudden I feel Gale's rough hands cup my face gingerly, forcing me gently to look back at him. "We're okay." He says slowly, trying to convey his words and, no doubt to calm my nerves. I nod weakly, grabbing a hold of the life raft he's tossing out to me. Letting him ground me once again. I give him a small smile and nod with more conviction. "Okay." I whisper, not looking away from his eyes. Gale gives me a reassuring smile and gently rubs his thumb against my cheek, before dropping his hand all together, only to hoist up the metal basket with a proud smirk on his lips. I want to show his excitement about the sponsor gift we've just received. However, I know what each and every gift means, it means debt. It means that the men and women sponsoring us, will want repayment for their help. Swallowing thickly, I plaster on a smile. And from the new smile Gale wears tells me he believes it, so I know that the audience will as well.

Numbly, I watch with fake fascination as Gale opens up the package, as we both lean in. The sponsor gift includes fresh rolls, goat cheese, apples, strawberries, a container of some wine, and a tureen of lamb stew on wild rice.

I watch numbly and in an unseeing trance as Gale dishes out two plates for us, on the complimentary saucers that came in the package as well as some silverware and some napkins. I can't help but want to laugh. Of course the Capitol want us to be neat and tidy, even in these stupid games. My stomach turns in disgust making me less hungry for any type of combustibles, but I know I need to keep my strength about; If not for myself then for Gale, my father, Finnick, Annie, Peeta and his brothers. I swallow thickly, and prey that I'll be able to stomach something as Gale hands me the saucer and a metal Spork. I can't help but gnaw at my bottom lip, hoping more than anything that we will be out of these games sooner than later. Our plates contain the same amount of food: a few bits of strawberries, a split roll between the two of us, and two scooping's of the lamb stew over the wild rice with a small metal collapsible cup with a generous amount of wine for our sanity.

The sound of the cave is filled with the faint sound of the rain falling outside as well as the steady sporadic sound of our silverware against the fine china. Each bite I take is tasteless and pulls at my stomach threatening me to spew chunks if I ingest any more.

"I think Haymitch, either felt tired of watching us starve or felt bad for us. Neither, good in my opinion," Gale mumbles. Stuffing another bite into his mouth his gray intense gaze is fixed on my too big and dirty shoes.

"Probably," I concede. Brushing, some hair out of my face, I set my half finished food to the side, my stomach turning even further.

My mind is bombarded of all that I know Finnick and Johanna have been through. Of the price their lives have costed since their triumph in the Hunger games. The fact that I know Finnick I forced to hop from bed to bed, with each and every new client he acquires; and I know the same can be said about Miss. Mason.

All the stories Fin has drunken confided in me, all come rushing back. Making it hard to breath and even think with its horrendousness. I try to force away the tears that spring to my eyes as I imagine all the Capitol people, wanting to have a piece of the innocent yet fierce mayors daughter. Of all the money President Snow, will not turn down; I feel like I will be sick, in a matter of seconds.

Swallowing down the bile, I force a smile and try to focus on watching Gale intently. To etch the way he lets his gray eyes slightly shine with glee as he eats food; its almost like how they shine back home, whenever I would catch him indulging in foods he doesn't normally get back home. And again my stomach is turning, sending my blood rushing with haste as I feel my thoughts start to wan with reality and the way my mind seems to have adapted to working while in these games.

"We should take this slow," I state. I push the food around on my plate before forcing a bite into my mouth then swallowing it. "Remember how we stuffed ourselves the first time and we were both sick."

Gale nods. His hazel eyes fixed on me for a split second before they fall back to his plate as he readies another bite, this one smaller than the others. I clench my jaw, my eyes as well finding my plate as I think about how he must think I'm daft. He and I both know I've never been starving a day in my life before these games and it makes me sick feeling that familiar wall starts to come back up once more. Or maybe its my mind playing trick on me again, turning me even more mad than I will ever be capable to understand.

My Spork clatters on the plate slightly as I set it down in favor of draining the small cup of wine, "its better to sip not drain," my father had always said. "It lets the flavor heighten it." I roll my eyes hearing my dads voice as if it was yesterday he was telling it to me on my thirteenth birthday, the first time I ever tasted alcohol. Though, Haymitch always said, "what does it matter? It is all going to the same place and it will get you drunk quicker." And right now, sitting in this dark cave, in this frigid element I agree with the latter of them.

Looking at my plate, I cant help but think about Effie, and her comment about the savage tributes from last years Hunger Games. With a smile breaking out onto my face, I can't help but dive back into my food, my Spork all but forgotten as I use my fingers to feed myself. Gale looks at me with a slight smirk and an eyebrow quirked in question, gaining a small chuckle from me.

"I bet Effie's loving this." I state with conviction, making Gale smile wolfishly.

"Definitely," he replies with a full pledged smile breaking across his face. I watch with amusement as Gale also abandons his Spork in favor of using his finger to pile a nice size bite into his mouth. "We miss you Effie," he says after swallowing his bite, some lamb stew and rice clinging to his chin, adding to the theatrics of the whole situation. I can't help but laugh and Gale follows along, his dreamy chortle mixing with mine and ringing throughout the small cave.

"I wonder what it will be like back home, when we get out of here." I say, holding the 'if we make it out of here' to myself. I stare at my plate absentmindedly as my mind wanders to the unforeseen future and what it might bring for us both. "I bet Haymitch will be just the best neighbor anyone can hope for."

Gale's laughter gains my attention making me blush. I can't help but thank the darkness of the cave, for concealing my probably very bright blush from all of Panem to see. "Yeah, that will be nice." Gale replies, his words laced with humor, I'm sure only I can decipher. "I guess it will be quite besides the occasional drunken rants from our mentor."

An unsuspecting laugh bubbles at me but quickly subsides with the thought of my god father, guilt welling up inside me. Regardless of what the whole of Panem thinks of him, he is an outstanding god father and always has been there for me when I've needed him most. The lonely nights weren't so bad with his drunken presence, even if he occasionally forgot who I was at times still helped me feel not so alone in my solitude life that was forced upon me.

Thinking about my drunken mentor makes me think about what he might think of my performance in these games. Will he be proud of me or maybe even angry? Will he think I am being too soft hearted with how easily I have thrown my trust and care around while in these treacherous games? However, I can picture him standing drunkenly with a glass of cheap alcohol in his hand as he nods approvingly before continue on his attempt to drink himself into an early grave. The thought alone pulls at my heart in such a way that makes me lost of breath. I swallow thickly trying to contain my traitorous emotions that would no doubt get me killed even sooner by President Snow, if he has anything to do about it.

"I bet your father is just going to throw a big party once we get home."

"What do you mean?"

"Well I'm from the seam, so I can only imagine what he thinks of his precious daughter soling herself with the likes of me." Gale states, a hint of bitterness evident in his voice.

I pause another bite to my mouth midair, not stopping my hard stare of shock that is targeted towards Gale, himself. "It won't matter anyhow, you won't be a boy from the seam when we get home. You'll be a boy from the victor village!" I can't help but state. Making damn sure I add a small amount of anger in my words that I'm sure only Gale will be able to catch. I had honestly thought we were past this, but apparently not. I guess somethings take some time to get use to, so I can't really find it in myself to blame Gale, knowing he's never really met daddy. If he had he would know how nice and caring my father is usually, even if he isn't around much he always made sure I knew how much my mother and I meant to him in addition to make sure we had everything we might need. If he was born into my life he would understand an hell of a lot more, as well would I if I was born into the seam.

"What do you think the victor village is like?" Gale questions; no doubt, trying to hastily change the conversation into something more Capitol viewer appropriate.

I feel a morsel of anger boil up in me at my naive slip up but square it away before it can show on my face. "Its actually quite nice." I state, a small smile coming to my lips as I think about the quite secluded victor village, I have visited on many occasions. No one to talk and laugh behind my back in the quiet confined space of the empty victor village, as if I had no feelings in the least and couldn't hear there poor attempts at whispering. Even if Haymitch lived in a practical mess out there, it still beat having to fake a smile as if I couldn't hear the spiteful words spit at me, for things I can't help.

"Its nice and quiet. Sure, Haymitch isn't the ideal neighbor the houses make up for it, as well as the seclusion away from the town. It especially looks lovely in the snow, no dirty snow just pure white powder since Haymitch it pretty much a homebody." I make known, a fawn smile prying onto my lips with the thought of my bumbling drunk god father.

In an instant my smile slips away just as fast as it appears, the thought of maybe having to kill Thresh, our new acquired friend.

"Who do you think will make it down to the final three?" I question. My mind muddled with pointless emotions, even though I know all these other kids will have to die in order for us to be able to go home freely.

With Gale's silence, I can't help but look up at him and see the noticeable uncertain look play throughout his gorgeous features. "While you were passed out…" Gale trails off rubbing the back of his neck, swallowing thickly twice, I know it can't possibly be anything good. "Thresh died-I'm not certain how, though I guess if we make it out of here then the recap will explain that much to us."

I stare blankly at him, trying to decipher the chaotic feelings raging inside me, fighting for dominance. I don't know what I was expecting, or hell even thinking would happen with Thresh. I already knew he had to die for us to win. However, it is in no way making up for it at this point in time. Maybe I subconsciously wanted to have seen Thresh's picture pop up in the sky. To, give him my own silent farewell and thanks. Leaning back against the rocky cave wall, I subconsciously place my half eaten plate down on the ground and pull my knees towards my chest, trying to work past the heavy bubble of sorrow that has taken residence in my chest cavity. I know that I should be happy about us not having to deal with him in that manor, knowing his weight would have taken me down and the gods only know what would transpire with Gale and him. But all I can think about is the boy who was swiftly becoming a good friend to us both, that he saved me and spared my life in a matter of seconds, and that another one of my friends are gone adding to my own world of chaos.

"Are you alright, Madge?" Gale asks.

I can find it in me to get a word, or even a sound out so I end up giving him a noncommittal shrug, wrapping my arms securely around my slender legs, hugging them close to my body. I take in a shaky breath knowing I can't let my real emotions show, at least not while in here. I can't keep coming off as this weak sniveling baby. Rive and Rue were one thing, with us sharing a lengthy alliance, but Thresh and us were only allies of a short period of time and the Capitol people, with there weird thinking's wouldn't understand in the least that all these deaths are murder. Acting this way won't gain us any point to win in the arena, where decency and kindness are no more than an empty word held onto by the weak, like myself.

"Its just that… If we didn't win, I wanted him to instead of Cato. I wanted him to win for Rue-for their District."

"Yeah, I know what you mean." He says, now staring unseeingly at his food as if he has lost his appetite as well. "But this means that were that much closer to going home to District Twelve." Setting his plate down like my own, Gale strides over to me, eliminating the small space between us. He lowers himself down next to me then nudging me with his elbow.

"It also means that Cato might have supplies once again, which means he might have a fighting chance still." I can't help but whispering out as I turn my head to gaze at Gale. His stormy eyes meet mine and its like an unspoken understanding passes between us, of him understanding of what I'm terrified of Cato doing to me, of him hurting Gale.

"He'll be hunting us more likely."

"He will be wounded though." I exclaim aloud, thinking to myself. "Thresh would have put up a fight-they were in his element, out in that field."

Gale gives me a contemplated look before nodding in agreement, "yeah, Thresh wouldn't have went down without a fight."

"That will help us out in the end. The more wounded he is the easier it will be for us to take him down." I state matter-of-factly.

I don't miss the swift look of dread that pass through Gale's features before he masks his expression to one of nothingness. I know he won't go into any type of explanation about the look, knowing that when he decides to keep things to himself than there is no prying him about it.

Looking at the cave entrance, my mind wanders to thinking about how the Gamemakers will be wanting blood soon. I swallow thickly, letting my eyes stare at the moonlight beaming in through the small crawl space telling me its late and that tomorrow we'll most likely have to face off against Cato, and I don't think either of us are looking forward to dealing with the blood thirsty brute from District Two.

"You should get some sleep, I'll take watch and wake you if I start getting tired." Gale states.

Looking at him, I can tell he must be thinking about exactly what I am, and this alone makes me feel just a miniscule better and not so much alone.

"I slept for a while when I was passed out… How about I take first watch? I promise to wake you if I start nodding off."

Gale appraises me with a stern, impenetrable look that makes me want to turn away, but I force myself to keep eye contact with his piercing gaze. I can tell that he wants to argue over my suggestion, but instead he just nods. Looking away from me Gale scrubs at his face with his hands before turning back to me and giving me a swift peck to my lips then continuing on hi way over to our makeshift bed. I can't fight the smile that breaks out onto my face, though I do stop myself from looing anywhere anyone can see it.

"Just wake me up when you start getting tired. And Undersee's don't try and take the whole night watch, thinking you're doing me any type of favor!" Gale states, giving me a penetrating gray eyed warning look that makes me nod vigorously.

"I won't. Don't worry, I'll wake you up at a decent time. That way, we'll both have an even amount of watch time." I point out, walking over towards the cave wall closer to Gale. Sliding down the wall, I sit down, my back at its usual full height straightness. Gale mutely tosses over his jacket to me making me smile again, this time from the butterflies I feel flapping around in my stomach, making it a jumble of nervousness.

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it, Madge."

Though Gale is laying down covered up tightly with the sleeping bags, he doesn't make a move to close his eyes and catch some sleep. Instead, he stares at me. Both of us hold the gaze even though neither of us attempt at speaking.

"I use to listen to you play- That park in town, sometimes I would take my siblings there… I never likes having to wait there for them for what felt hours. But then one day I started to pay attention to the fact that, I could hear you playing that piano-you always could hear it. I would never say it back home, but I would find myself not minding staying any longer… It gave me a reason to have to listen to you-I liked listening to you play…. I like listening to you play. You play so beautifully, Madge. It made me want to talk to you at some points, then at others hate you… Pose… She-we couldn't even imagine having that type of money-to buy a piano, let alone to have the money to hire someone to teach us to use it." Gale starts, then stops. His eyes fall to look at my shoes, in favor of not meeting my no doubt lost, fixed stare. "The worst thing was that I knew you weren't one of those girls, Madge-not because I'm that bright when it comes to girls. But because Katniss would always talk about you doing these great things for everyone you could, helping out at the elementary school… How you always tried to make an effort to be nice to me when I gave you no reason to-I regret that. Gods, do I regret being such an ass to you. It was never you and always me. It seemed easier to force myself to hate you when I stood no chance of ever winning you over, showing you I could be worth your time… I'm just sorry it took me so long, I hope with time, if-when we get home that you'll forgive me. I'm going to earn it, I swear. I promise I'll make everything, I've ever done wrong to you up!"

Once again I find myself lost in Gale's intense gaze as my muddled brain tries to take in his confession I open my mouth ready to try and force some response out. However, Gale beats me to it by silencing me with a swift unexpected searing kiss, that I feel all the way down to my toes. The type of kiss you read about in old fairytales, the kind you wish for all your childhood. The kind of kiss I never expected to get, let alone get it from Gale Hawthorne. Instead of wasting anymore time trying to decipher whatever has brewed between us, I decide to let myself fall into the love I feel for Gale. All, the fear that held me back all but forgotten. Knowing he really does love me just as much as I have always loved him. All the girls that have been, or have been pinning for him seem so trivial to me now, because when it came down to it, Gale has chosen me of his own freewill.

The kiss hastily heats us in a matter of seconds. Gale's lips are hard and hungry against mine, prying my mouth open in a way I've not even experienced with either of Rye or Finnick. I tangle my fingers into his wild mane, pulling him closer to me and causing him to squish me even further into the hard pointed wall of the cave. Not caring in the least, only wanting more of him. As much as he is willing to give, and that seem to be all his heart and soul?

Smiling into the kiss, I pull back to stare into his wild, yet hard eyes. I can't help but beam at him, even in these horrifying circumstances he seems to be able to take me elsewhere. As I open my mouth, Gale states. "I'm going to turn in. But remember to wake me as soon as you're starting to feel exhaustion seep in." I just nod, not knowing what else to do. Though, his words aren't even enough to wipe the stupid happy smile I'm sporting.

Somehow, Gale is able to fall asleep in no time at all. Probably a trait he picked up from his need to get as much sleep as he could back home; with always having to run out into the woods to provide for his family and having to still deal with school, and what had seem like a sure addition to soon working at the mines. However, that has changed now. A lot has changed now.

Somewhere during my shift, the rain stops all at once. Not like any natural rain, and it quickly yanks me back to earth and out of my clouded bliss, realizing that the Gamemakers are definitely up to something. Probably, setting up for the final blood battle between us three. Most likely wanting to make the most attention grabbing fight they can possibly have unfold. I swallow thickly, trying to loosen a knot in my throat that seems to want to clog my airway. Looking down, I stare at my now flame voided nails, that have dirt and some blood caked underneath them. Mutely, and rather subconsciously I start picking it out, trying to busy myself so I won't start spiraling into a depression thinking up any possible situation we might be thrust into that might compromise us winning this game.

For the first time, I let myself think about the possibility of us winning, well rather of me making it out with Gale and going home. Of getting to see my father and Peeta again, as well as getting to thank Finnick and Haymitch for all they've been doing for me while I've been in this hellhole. The big house in the victor village, that I'll live in. Preferably next to Haymitch if I'm lucky enough. No more worrying about getting married off to some old man President Snow makes me settle down with. And all the freedom I never imagined I'd get, especially with being the mayors trophy daughter. But then what? What will my life be like after that? After all the hype from this years Hunger Games has calms down, then what? If Gale and I make it out will Snow still try to sell us off? Will we get married to save ourselves from that? Would Gale want to marry me? He says he loves me but, it is enough to marry me at some point? Will I turn into Haymitch, drinking my life away trying to distance my mind in any means away from the horrors I've been made to endure while in here?

One thing is entirely too sure for me and that is I will never have children, not while this is the world they would come into. I couldn't stomach them getting thrown into some game just because of who I am. No doubt having a victors child would be an attention grabber for any games since its never happened yet. Me having kids would mean they would already be guarantee a spot in a future game, and because of the defiance I unknowingly keep making they will no doubt die for all to see. All as a show of the power President Snow has over all of us.

Not wanting to stay awake any longer, and when I think it has been a fair amount of time for my watch to be up, I finally decide to wake Gale for his turn of keeping watch. I sit up straighter, cracking some of my bones in the process from sitting so stiff for too long then in the next couple of seconds I crawl over to Gale and give him a gentle shake to his shoulder.

"Gale, its time for your turn to watch," I whisper near his face. In a matter of seconds, Gale's eyes open and I'm met with his intense molten gray eyes piercing into me. He looks at me for a second or two, before a gentle smile touches his lips.

"Is it my turn?" His gruff sleep laced voice asks.

I nod mutely, giving him a smile of my own. He dips his head into a hesitant nod then pushes the sleeping bags off himself before he's stretching his lengthy body out making me swallow with nervousness. Gale gives me a lopsided smile as his head cocks to the side slightly, "do you want to have some bread and some goat cheese before you tuck in?" he questions in a whisper. Not being able to say anything, I just nod, a happy feeling bubbles up in my chest working an even brighter onto my lips.

Wordlessly we both busy ourselves, Gale with spreading the goat cheese onto two slices of bread while I pour us each a cup of the wine to wash the bread down. We eat in a comfortable silence as the slow blowing wind rustles the tree branches outside the cave, making it almost like we're back in District Twelve. I practically in hale my portion of the small snack, wanting to hurry up and get some sleep so we can just get this whole ordeal over with. I never thought I could so desperately want to return back to District Twelve, but having been in this terrible game, I can't help but miss the safe haven I once had. The quiet comfortable life my father provided me with. Once I'm done with my food I softly set my cup off to the side then crawl underneath the sleeping bag, thanking the gods for the phantom warmth that still lingers from Gale's body from his earlier rest.

"Goodnight… I'll see you when the first rays of sun start peeking through, right?" I get out in more of a question than a statement before I'm overcome with a yawn.

"Alright," he agrees. Giving me a jerk of his head once, up and down before turning his gaze towards the entrance of the cave, the bow sits grasped tightly in one of his hands while the other rolls a arrow delicately between his pointer finger and thumb. I watch him toy around with the arrow for a few short minutes before I feel the calm and inviting pull of sleep start to tug me under, making my eyes heavier and heavier with every passing second.

Finnick and I sit on the back porch of my house, a glace of chilled ice tea in each of our hands and a plate of cucumber finger sandwiches sits between us. The sun is shinning bright and high in the sky, making my skin feel nice and warm. "You'd like District Four, I bet. Its gorgeous. I could teach you to swim and fish if you came and visited. It would hopefully be around the summer festival, there is a lot of singing, dancing, and the best kinds of drinks and food to choose between. I wish I could introduce you to my ma, pa, and my three snot nosed brothers but... But, I can introduce you to Mag's, she's a great woman. Really awesome, she been helping me stay sane during all of this… To stay me you know?" Finnick says. A fawn smile playing on his lips, a far away look in his brilliant green eyes as she squints into the cloudless blue sky. "I wish I could just take you home with me, I swear you would really like it. I'd keep you safe. Keep you away from old perverted Capitol scum, that come and stay here-it makes me sick just thinking about you not being able to be safe in your own god damn home. I just wish that, I guess things could be nice-not filled with all this fear and killing, like we live in now… Do you know what I mean?"

I can't find any words to say so I just place my hand on the right hand of Finn's, which lays back behind him as he lounges back, keeping himself in a slightly reclined position. I curl my hand around his giving it a grasp, trying to convey to him with this small action, that I know exactly what he means and I wish for the exact same. A place where we could, be safe. Away, from all this bloodbath that the Capitol and President Snow inflicts on us all. That I would go to District Four with him if I had the choice. That even though I've only know him a short while, I care about him dearly and consider him a friend. And maybe if we lived in a different place, during a different period of time then maybe we could be together or something like that. We're alike enough and we get along great, plus it doesn't hurt that he doesn't scowl or say nasty things about me, like the kids from school… Like Gale Hawthorne, and his friends, well except for Katniss and of course Peeta and a small list of others.

Just then Finnick repositions himself into a sitting positon, his hand now grasped gently around mine, as if he were afraid to break me and this along makes me uncomfortable from the amount of embarrassing attention he is showing me. With a quick intake of breath that gets caught in my throat, I yank my hand back into my lap, clasping my hands together tightly. My eyes fly towards to bright sky making me squint subconsciously. I can feel Finnick staring at me in confusion, causing me to swallow out of nervousness. I can't stop my mind from going to the fact that poor Finnick is going to be heading back to his District today, in addition that as soon as he gets back there he will be starting up on his half of things in order to keep his family safe from Snow's grasp.

A gentle yet firm shake, makes me slowly come out of my dream and awakens me. When I open my eyes, I'm staring up into the smiling face of Gale, who sits crouched on the pads of his feet leaning over me slightly, in order to wake me up. My dream still lingers in my mind making it hard to not think about the life I could have had with Finnick. But, then I wouldn't have this new found relationship I now have with Gale. Plus being with me, would only be damaging for poor Finn. I know it would destroy him if he lost anyone else so close to him. And I can't find it in my heart or even my will to make the feelings I hold for Gale disappear, even if I wanted to.

"I figured we could have a filling meal, then make our way back towards the Cornucopia. We'll wait there for Cato, if he's not already there then we'll have an advantage of a surprise attack you know. Cato is probably still hurt from Thresh, or at least I hope so." Gale states, moving back from me. A look of determination set in on his face, telling of the storm brewing inside of him. One I know won't be extinguished unless we win this game or we die trying.

I nod, sitting up I rub the remainder of sleep from my eyes and shove the sleeping bags off my body. I watch in a silence trance as Gale loads up two plates with a nice filling proportion for the both of us. The feeling of uneasiness blankets over me, bringing my nerves to a new high and causing my hands shake slightly with fear. There is no doubt in my mind that Gale will make it out of here alive, he is the fighter of us two. However, I'm not too certain about myself. I know I'm already loosing myself, I'm not sure how I might survive if Cato does somehow get to me, or even a mutt sent to finish me off for President Snow. All I can hope is that I'll live to see tomorrow… That I'll make it back home, to District Twelve, to my family and the little amount of friends I do have, and somehow start rebuilding my crumbing life. Annie did it, so maybe I can as well.

"Here," Gale says. He gently pushes a plate into my hands, which I gratefully take from him. I shove a juicy strawberry into my mouth, buying myself for some much needed time as I try to sort through my emotions that are whirling inside of me, like a tornado. Silently, I try to calm my nerves if even by a little. I need my head to be in the right place. To keep my wits about me so I don't end up killing myself and even worst taking Gale down with me. We've come too far for me to jeopardies this for us, all because I've had a few screws come loose in my head since my time here. But all I can think about is how easily, Cato can snap my neck. Just a tight grasp and a harsh jerk and I'd be done for.

I don't realize, I've abandoned eating until I hear Gale's gruff, yet soothing voice call out to me. "Are you alright?" He questions, a look of concern etched in his steely eyes, one I'm not so use to. However, I feel given time it won't surprise me any longer. I just stare at him in a muted silence, wide eyed and no doubt looking entirely lost. So instead of answering him, I hesitantly set my plate of uneaten food off to my side then I sluggishly crawl the small space between us. Gale's boring into me as he watches me like a hawk. Hesitantly, I slowly lean towards him, letting my eyes flutter closed then I press my lips against his, savoring the feeling and praying to the gods that it won't be our last kiss. As I begin to pull back, Gale wraps his strong arm around my shoulders and brings me closer into him, pressing his lips to mine once again. Though, instead of the shy chaste kiss I gave him, this one is full of something I can't quite figure out. Its like a hello, a thank you, and a goodbye all in one, but I must be reading it wrong. I have to be reading it wrong. When I pull back this time, Gale lets me. I search his face trying to gauge his reaction but all I see is the stoic face, I grew up observing. Concealed and careful of what might show on his handsome face.

"I'm not too hungry," I confess. My eyes moving around the cave as I speak, taking in the place that has kept us safe. A place we won't see again. "I think I'm far too nervous to be able to eat anything."

Gale gives a small grunt in acknowledgement. Though, I don't turn to look at him, I know he is watching me intently like usual. I let the silence consume us, not knowing what to say and really not wanting to say anything. What could there be to say? 'Hey, I hope we can kill Cato quickly, so we can go home!' Somehow, I don't think that is a great conversation starter, even in the Hunger Games.

"I have a feeling todays the day," Gale says. I sit up straighter and finally look back at my ally, giving him my agreement in a jerky nod. "How do you think they'll do it?"

I stay silent, letting his words roll over me, taking them in. I've grew up watching these game, and I have a better understanding of how the Capitol works, of how President Snow works. Licking my lips I take in a calming breath, "They'll want to make a show… They'll drive us together if we take too long to move-most likely it will be at the Cornucopia, since it is extravagant enough like a stage. They'll want it to be an open area for the best capable watching platform for all of Panem to see." I state matter-of-factly. I can't meet Gale's eyes any longer so I divert my attention to a rip in the knee of my pants, tracing it with my eyes a few times. I hear the familiar sound of Gale's grunt of understanding.

Not before too long, my attention is diverted back to the gray eyed boy from home as he gets to his feet and starts gathering up our gear. "There is no sense of wasting any valuable time that could be used in our favor.

Leaving the cave has a sense of finality about it. I don't think there will be another night for either of us in this arena. Dead or alive, one way or the other, I will be going home. Whether its on my own accords, or in a cheap wooden box, I'll once again be back home in District Twelve. Giving the cave one final look of goodbye, I look away from it and follow after Gale as we make our way towards the Cornucopia-to the final battle. I can't help the wetness that wells up in my eyes with each step I take behind Gale, trying to step lightly and ass quietly as I can. While my mind wanders to my allies I've lost… To the friends I had made, the ones who stole away in my heart without even trying. Closing my eyes I give a silent goodbye of my own to them; to River and Rue, to Marvel and Avery, to Clove, Thresh, Glimmer, an all the rest of the kids who have lost their lives just for the Capitol and President Snow's amusement.

When I open my eyes, I'm looking into the eyes of Gale, and all at once I feel foolish. Though, he doesn't say a word I can tell just by the look in his eyes that he understands me, understands that I need to care for people; its just how I am. How I will always be, regardless of anything.

"I said the pond has dried up, but I remember passing a small stream that might have some flowing water still," he says. I nod weakly and once again follow after him as he begins to walk.

When we reach the stream, we both release small sighs of relief and quickly get to work filling out canteens, not knowing how much water we'll need for the remained of the time we're left here. As I add the treatment drops to the canteens, Gale paces lightly. Back and forth, "You're right, they're driving us towards the Cornucopia… Leading us like sheep." He says, whispering the last bit for only us to hear.

"Then lets go now, while we still have our energy and strength. Lets end this and go home. I put forth, jumping to my feet. I toss Gale two canteens and put the remaining two into my pack, swallowing thickly I can't help but feel like I did at the beginning of these games. The first day, like there's twenty-two tributes to weed out to go home-to help Gale home. But now its different. Twenty-one of them are dead and only Cato is left. Sure Cato is large and strong, but he is also hurt, and I have Gale standing at my side to help me. I feel scared and weak, yet strong and confident. If nothing more at least Gale will make it back to the comfy life of a victor, with my help. And that is all I ever wanted coming into these games, Gale to live. For Gale to go back to his family and live a live like the one I had, no fear of starving or dying from the cold.

Gale must be able to read the inner turmoil that is unfolding inside of me, because in three large strides he walks over to me and pulls me into a tight embrace. We stay like that for a while, just the sound of the leaves rustling around our boots, and the warm feeling of the sun beating against us. "Two against one, this should be easy." He says, giving me a final squeeze before we pull back from one another. I give him a small but hopeful smile, "next time we eat, it will be in the Capitol, and then we go home." I can't help but say.

"You bet," Gale replies. Then without another word, from either of us we head for the Cornucopia.

I know since Gale has had some Capitol medicine, Cato shouldn't be too much of a pain for him to take, especially with him being injured.

I try to keep up with Gale's large strides, ignoring the burning to my lungs and the pain in my side that tells me I need to give my body a rest, but looking at Gale's broad back I can't help but not want to be any trouble, to delay this inevitable fight any longer. A whooshed of air leaves me in a shaky exhale before I gasp in another mouth full of air, that almost feels too crisp in my lungs, making my eyes water at the brisk pace Gale has set for us. Looking down I attempt to distract myself by watching my feet, forcing them to keep moving , to keep up the hasty pace we are going at.

When all of a sudden, I slam into Gale's sturdy chest making me stumble backwards almost falling off my feet, if not for Gale's swift arms reaching out to steady me. I look at him, trying to control my labored breathing, feeling my face heat with a blush of embarrassment. "Lets rest for a moment," he puts forth. A gentle look on his face, his eyes looking from one than the other of my eyes before he releases his hold on my arms and plops down onto the ground with a an exaggerated sigh of comfort that makes me let loose a short chuckle of amusement as I follow his lead.

We sit in a comfortable silence, only my ragged breathing and the sound of the rustling tree leaves and the occasional sound of the birds chirping and singing. Glancing around, I follow Gale's view and smile seeing the large lake and not too far from it, the Cornucopia. "At least we made it," I state proudly. Feeling a little bit better for not causing too much of a decline in our progression. Gale looks over at me and gives me a smile then lays down on his back, his eyes close as he rests. I smile fondly at him before letting my eyes drift towards the canopy of the trees above us. I watch in awe at the mockingjays flitting about merrily. Bouncing melodies back and forth between each other, like unseen brightly colored balls of joy. Without being able to stop myself, I open my mouth and sing out Rue's four-note tune. I can feel them pause curiously at the sound of my unexpected voice, listening no doubt for more. So I repeat the tune again in the silence. First one mockingjay trills the tune back, then another until I'm immersed in a beautiful serenade of Rue's tune all around me.

As I continue to watch the mockingjays, listening intently to them singing for us, for Rue. I can't help but let my fingers move to my jacket and run gently over my late aunts pin, almost like I'm scared to break it. I can't help but hope that my mother and my aunt are proud of me, of all that I've done in here. That I haven't let these games take away the Madge who cares for everyone, and everything.

"That's Rue's song… I think they remember it. They remember her…" I say trailing off as I feel my heart squeeze with pain at the thought of my little bird, my friend and ally who died way too early in her young life. I can feel Gale's stare, though he doesn't say anything.

The music swells, reminding me of the piano back home in my house. I recognize the sheer beauty and the brilliance of the tune. As the notes overlap, the compliment one another, forming a lovely unearthly harmony that makes my eyes well up with tears of awe and happiness. It was this song that Rue thought me, the same song she would use that sent the orchard workers of District Eleven home each night. I can't help but to think if someone starts it at quitting time, I wonder, now that he is dead? She had brought so many unknown things into my life that I hadn't realized I wanted; a little sister to help and teach, someone I could confide in and tell my secrets to. But most of all someone I got the chance of meeting someone so kind and caring, without a mean bone in her body, who didn't see the broken girl I was becoming-had become, but instead just saw me… Just saw Madge, and I wish I could have at least of saved her the pain of how she died, she deserved something so much more than a spear to the chest.

Closing my eyes, I whisper her my thanks and send her my love. "I will win these games for you little bird!" I think determinedly.

Then something begins to disturb them, disrupt the music. Runs cut off in jagged uncut lined making me wince and open my eyes. Gale's eyes meets mine, without a word and we stare at each other. As the dissonant notes intersperse with the melody rings all around us. The mockingjays' voices rise up in one of shrieking alarm.

In seconds we're on our feet, Gale wielding the bow, and me poised with a knife, when the unmistakable sound of pounding feet hits us. One, that tells us that whatever is running is coming straight for us.

"Get to the Cornucopia! It's tall enough to keep us safe." Gale states in a confident stern voice that makes my stomach turn in knots from the impending attack heading our way.

"Run Madge!" Gale yells, pulling on my hand as he simultaneously shoulders his backpack as he tugs me into a swift run. Gale lets go of my hand as soon as he's sure I am running behind him. I try to keep up with Gale's long strides. Not being able to help myself, I chance a glance back and my heart almost stops as I see some type of mutt dogs, eleven to be exact, chasing after Gale and I. I feel fear spike in me that makes tears pool in my eyes.

"They're mutts, Gale!" I screech, turning back to look at the back of Gale's head and push myself to run faster. My foot catches on a root of a tree causing me to stumble and fall forward. Smashing the side of my face to the ground as well as scraping up the palms of my hands. For a second I feel an unimaginable amount of fear rise in me. I can't help but feel this might be it, 'Madge Undersee, done in by mutts.' But before I can let myself be fully overcome with fear and to possibly freeze up, I feel a calloused hand grasp mine. With a strong jerk, Gale pulls me back to my feet and yanks be behind him in a swift paced run. I don't ever grasp how I'm supposed to ever repay Gale for all he has done for me while in here. Just as we break free from the tree line, I see Cato break through to the clearing as well. A couple meters away from us, with ten mutts close on his tail as he books it to the Cornucopia like us.

In the glint of the sun I can tell that Cato has some how acquired some armor, no doubt from his bag that Thresh took.

The sweat beads down my neck and brow as I force myself to ignore my labored breathing and run as fast as I can for the Cornucopia, just on the heels of Gale. Once we reach the Cornucopia, Gale stops and looks back at me with molten gray eyes. "Up you go, Undersee'" he states, grabbing me around the waist and hoisting me up. The metal of the Cornucopia feels hot against my flesh as my fingers claw at is, trying to find some place that will help me heave myself up onto the top of the structure. All while trying to be hasty to get Gale out of harms way.

When my fingers finally fine a place to hold onto, I push off of Gale's knee and drag myself up against the metal of the Cornucopia.

Stumbling blindly, I clamber to my feet and swiftly reach down for Gale's hand to try and help bring him to the top of the Cornucopia with me. Grabbing his hand, I give a yank trying with all my might to help him up as I chance a glance at the swiftly approaching mutts that are viciously snarling and barking excessively. My eyes bulge and I feel a sweat begin breakout on the back of my neck as well as on my hands which strikes fear in my heart, praying by all that I have that the slick sheen of sweat on my hands won't let my grasp on Gale's hand and forearm falter.

Pulling in a deep breath, I halt my breathing and use all my might to heave him up, with the help from his feet pressing against the Cornucopia. My blood seems to heat with the excursion as I try harder to get Gale t safety, when out of nowhere one of the mutts' jaw clamps tightly around his ankle, causing him to grit his teeth and start vigorously kicking at the mutt as I continue to try and pull him up towards me. With a final well placed kick to the mutts head it finally lets go of his leg and once again he begins to try and climb up the side of the Cornucopia. When his hand is able to reach the side of the top of the Cornucopia he grips it tightly and helps me heave him up onto the structure.

When Gale is securely pulled to safety, we both collapse roughly to the hard roof of the structure, panting excessively. As we lay atop the Cornucopia I quickly regain myself and scurry to my feet and rush over to Gale, who is panting for breath while grimacing. His jaw is clenched tightly and his fist squeezed into fists, his knuckles an angry looking white, taunt over the tendons in his knuckles. Reaching for his pant leg, I swiftly jerk it up causing Gale to grunt in pain, but I pay it no mind as my eyes sweep over the deep puncture marks from the mutts teeth. Licking my lips I look towards Gale's face finding him looking back at me with a pale face. "You're going to be fine," I assure him, trying to force myself to smile in encouragement.

With deft fingers I quickly tear some of the material of my shirt away, not caring my stomach is now exposed, and instead I hurriedly wrap the fabric tightly around Gale's injury trying to will my fingers to not tremble in vain.

Sitting back on my heels I stare at Gale, but only for a short moment before my head jerks to the side as I hear the unmistakable sound of Cato's frightened and pained cries. Without a thought in my mind I fling myself up to my feet and rush over to the other side of the Cornucopia and gaze down off the side, where I see a pale faced Cato trying futility to clamber up the side of the Cornucopia. However, the armor and the dog on his arm seem to be weighing him down greatly.

Without thinking, and just riding on my moral compass I quickly splay myself on my front extending my arm towards him, "give me your hand!" I state in a hurry. In a brief second Cato's eyes meet mine and in the next he takes my hand, grasping it tightly in his own as his eyes look up at me pleading me to help him. As I start to pull him he sends a quick kick to the side of the mutt causing it to release him and then he swiftly works with me and climbs up to safety. The very second I'm sure Cato is away from the dangerous mutts I quickly turn back to Gale who looks at me with unrestrained anger and disbelief. Glancing over the side of the Cornucopia, I see that the mutts have started circling it, no doubt, looking for a way up, to get to us. As they do I catch a few of their eyes and can't help but feel dumbfounded as I look at one after another pair of familiar yet deceased eyes of our fallen tributes.

In our moment of lack of attention towards Cato, he strikes slamming into Gale and causing me to fall forwards, dangling dangerously close to toppling off the structure all together. My face comes inches from a swift snap of one of the mutts, causing me to screech out in terror and quickly clamber backwards to safety.

Getting to my feet my eyes come to rest on a Gale and Cato fighting relentlessly. Cato has the upper hand, but that doesn't deter Gale from punching him with all his might, looking for an opening to get the upper hand. A sharp ring cuts through the air, though the two fighting don't turn to its attention, I do. Looking towards the woods where the sound seems to have some from, I take note in the retreating mutts.

"Ah," I hear a pained Gale groan out, gaining my attention. I can't help but stare on in paralyzed fear. My eyes widen into saucers seeing a knife, Cato is holding stabbed into the side of Gale's upper chest. Gale's face is twisted in pain. His jaw clenched in both riddled pain and determination, not wanting let Cato to get even closer to him. But a swift unexpected twist of the hilt of the blade still plunged into Gale's body causes him to cry out in pain and loosen his hold on Cato, keeping him away from him, and moves towards the knife to pull it out. No sooner does that happen before Cato viciously socks Gale in the side of the face, rendering him out cold on impact. Then his murderous eyes come to land on me and before I can comprehend what I am doing, my feet are pulling me into a full out run. And in the next second, I'm barreling into Cato, sending him off Gale and for the both of us to off the top of the Cornucopia and to the ground with a harsh and dull smack.

My head rings from hitting the ground in the fall and I have bits of grass and dirt in my mouth. Just as I get to my hands and knees, in a swimmy daze, I'm laid flat on my stomach once more from a sharp placed kick to my gut by Cato. My breath leaves me with a whoosh. I squeeze my eyes shut tightly, trying with all my might to pull in even a sliver of breath to help ease the ache and fear that bubbles up inside of me. Steeling myself with a brave push forward, I spring my eyes open. There in front of me stand Cato, lurking over me. A sickening smile plays on his lip, which manages to cause bile to rise in my throat, out of terror.

In an instant I'm yanked up by my ponytail and aggressively turned over, which has my eyes popping open in shock and fear. A shriek of terror rattles in my throat but gets cut off as Cato sends a swift right hook to the side of my face causing my vision to black. My head lolled limply to the side as my vision swam with blurred dizziness. My mouth drops open some, releasing a weak gasp type whimper.

I feel my body being roughly shoved over as large hands start groping at me? No… Searching, but for what? I force myself to pry my eyes open then turn my head to look around. At the tree line, I see the mutts all waiting patiently, as if waiting for a signal to rush in and slaughter us. Turning my head once again I see Cato hovering over me. His eyes are casted downward, my eyes follow his line of sight only for my heart to about stop as I see him trying to unbutton my pants. His fingers move shakily and franticly making me damn well sure of his intentions.

With a dry, guttered scream I rise my arm up and send my elbow into the side of Cato's face causing him to fall to my side, obviously not expecting the blow. Taking advantage at him momentary distraction of his pain, I flop over onto my stomach and begin to try and scramble to my feet, falling a few times. An apparently, it's a few times to many because when I do manage to get to my feet I am yanked back by my hair, causing me to scream out in pain as my heads jerked back and stopping me from moving. Then I'm roughly shoved to the ground as my feet are taken from underneath me with a swift leg swipe. My face slams into the ground roughly, whiting my vision for a brief couple of minutes.

I taste the familiar copper taste of blood fill my mouth, as well as the grainy taste of dirt in my mouth. My ears ring preventing me from hearing anything else, thought I do feel the unmistakable feel of hands fumbling aggressively around at first underneath, thankfully over my bra. Before swiftly moving down to mess around with my pants; at the feeling of my pants being awkwardly shimmed off my slack body, I come alive with a new kind of anger.

Raising up on my hands, I twist the upper half of my body around then send my elbow to Cato's face, causing him to stagger back enough for me to pull my legs from underneath him then send my foot to his face as well. With a new sense of hope rising inside of me I quickly stumble back to my feet and make a dash for the Cornucopia. Slamming into the side of it, I feel tears swell up in my eyes as I start to jump up, trying in vain to grasp a hold of some place to pull myself up and away from Cato. My fingers graze against the over heated Cornucopia metal, feeling the slick feel of the structure with no pursues of getting to Gale and to safety.

"Gale!" I find myself screeching in desperation, my emotions bleeding into my words as tears start to stream down my cheeks as I continue to jump still trying to find a way up. I cock my head over my shoulder, taking a chance to make sure Cato is still indispose but I see he's getting to his feet as he cradles his nose that gushes blood profusely, staggering my way. I feel as if the entire blood in my body runs cold. Then like out of thin air a calloused large, warm hand grasps mine, pulling me upwards. A feeling of glee and hope rises up in me like a phoenix in its flaming rebirth, giving me a dream of us actually making it home.

I feel my pants slid down some, no doubt revealing my plain black underwear, I was supplied with. But before I'm able to be pulled up to the top, my ankle is grasped tightly, then followed by a swift yank that causes me to yowl in pain and fear. But Gale doesn't let go of my hand.

My fear ridden eyes meet with Gale's, probably revealing of my fear's to him. In his eyes I only see devastation and a mix of determination and fear.

"Gale," I say in a shaky fear ridden voice as more tears fill my eyes.

"I got you Madge, I got you. Don't let go. Don't worry, I got you." He replies in a strained voice that raises the small hairs on the back of my neck. Then the next moment another yank pulls me back down to the ground and away from Gale's grasp. A shrieking scream leaves my throat as I plummet back down to earth of the ground and towards Cato. In a second I feel a large hand around my throat tightening swiftly making my vision blur. However, not before too long the hand leaves my throat. I gasp greedily for air as I lay on the ground, my hands going to gently rub at my sore throat. I blink with vailed blurry eyes. Watching as Gale now wrestles roughly with Cato. I watch for a few strained minutes as they each struggle to get the upper hand then in a split second I'm once again on my shaky legs and rushing to Gale's defense.

I slam my shoulder into Cato, causing him to let go of Gale and stumble to the ground where I waste no time before slamming my fist into his fast followed by another then another. Feeling fear grasp ahold of me, not wanting to loose Gale. Swiping his feet up around my waist Cato once again regains the upper hand then even swifter sends a swift punch to the side of my face causing me to fall backwards and smack my face against something jagged and hard, causing my vision to blur black for a short while.

Blinking absentmindedly into the haunting beautiful sun I try to regain my barring's. I don't feel Cato's heavy body weight on mine any longer, though I do hear a barrage of flesh hitting flesh. No doubt in my mind that it's Gale and Cato going at it once again. Looking over to my right as I lay motionless on the hard earth I see a flurry of movements. A tall sturdy body, sends punch after punch into another body underneath it. Before my eyes flutter close and my mind goes blank.


	25. Chapter 25:Star-CrossedVictorsReturnHome

***Author Note* Sorry for the long wait you've all had to endure. I've been having a lot of trouble with my laptop recently, it deleted this chapter two times before I got fed up and forced myself to stop before I just didn't want to finish this story. It took a bit but I have finally gotten this chapter done. I sincerely hope you all like this chapter. Please forgive any errors I've missed and enjoy. You guys help me more than you know, so thank each and everyone of you. I love you all and I hope that you keep reading my little story :) I've been writing for the second book, and I hope that I will be able to upload later today or the following day. Feel free to message me or leave a comment, you guys are the best. Happy birthday to me :) and I pray that my life will be settling down some and for me to find happiness :) -xoxo007twihunger. **

**Chapter Twenty-Five: Star-crossed Victors Return Home**

When I come to I feel terrible. My head aches with pain and my stomach feels nauseous. Blinking my tired eyes, I force them open and am blinded by the bright harsh florescent lights. In an instant, my heart starts to hammer in my chest. Looking around I take notice of some Capitol doctors gathered all around me messing with some medical devices, which has my eyes widening in fear. Where is Gale?

Hearing a faint muffled pounding and something that almost sounds like screaming, I turn my head to the right and am met with the sight of a wild looking Gale Hawthorne, slamming his hands against the windowed wall. His palms are smeared with blood from his effort, his eyes are wide and filled with fury and unadulterated fear that he does nothing to hide. His mouth opens and closes after each power filled scream that almost looks like my name.

Seeing this sends me into my on panic. "Gale!" I screech out, flopping onto my side then swiftly pushing myself off the medical gurney. No sooner I do this I even quicker get to my feet, wobbling trying to rush towards Gale. But instead of making it to him, I am met with strong arms restraining me from all around. My hair flies carelessly around me and sticks to my sweat ridden face. My wild eyes meet with Gale's only to see that he is even more viciously slamming his hands against the glass the only thing lacing his eyes now is pure fear, and this alone has me feeling hopeless. What is going to happen to us? What is going to happen to me?

His erratic attempts at trying to get to me makes me start to fall in line with him. I starts to try to tear free from the hands that keep me captive. Thrashing violently, I flail about screaming for the mane trying desperately to get to me. To help me from whatever these sick people are going to do to me. I can't stop the tears from streaming down my cheeks.

"Gale! Gale!" My hoarse voice shrieks, terror trembling my body then the next thing I know I feel a sharp prick to the back of my neck and almost instantly my vision starts to blur and my whole body starts to feel like its made of lead.

"Ga-Gale…" I sluggishly get out as I feel my body going limp. The last thing I see is Gale's distressed face behind the glass separating us, looking terrified.

When I wake up for the second time, I'm afraid to move. Afraid of what has happened since I have been asleep, and even for a few seconds I fear that maybe they've killed me. I'm enclosed in a sterile white room, no windows and no doors; just the light glow of yellow light filling the room and a bed that I am strapped down too. Looking around with frantic eyes I see a few IV's stabbed into my pale flesh at the bend of my elbow and into the veins on the top of my hand. I want to tear them free from my body, not knowing what they are pumping into me. Violently, I starts trying to get free, thrashing wildly in the bed I'm being restrained in. Looking for any slack in the straps tied tightly around my wrists and ankles, but with no avail. I'm yanking so hard against the straps I feel them start to cut into my flesh, but this doesn't deter me in the least. I start trying to arch my back, to maybe break the straps that restrain me but I find I can't. Glancing down I see that there is another restraint strap across my abdomen making more panic swell up inside me. I feel tears well up in my eyes as I open my mouth and start screaming wildly with abandon. I rise my head and let my eyes fly around the room trying to find something to understand what is going on. But nothing but starch whiteness encases all around me making me shriek louder, and wilder. Not caring in the lease how crazy I might seem.

I let my head fall back against the bed, or rather the gurney I a strapped to, which causes some pain to fill the back of my head as well as make my screaming die out.

I can't help but wonder if Gale is going through the same thing as me. Is he okay? Is he still alive? Will I be able to ever see him again, or are we going to get punished for my display of rebellion in the games? I feel more tears spill out of my eyes, blurring my vision effortlessly. I know I can't keep sane if they have killed Gale. The mere thought of him dead brings an overwhelming ache of pain to my chest that knots my stomach with both fear and devastation. Without a second thought I once again rise my head up then send it slamming back against the gurney I'm on. I can't live without him to steady me. The pain that surges through my head hurts immensely bad, causing me to squeeze my eyes shut then once again lift my head then again slam it back down. I see a burst of colors flash behind my eyelids as my head fills with more pain as I continue on with myself assault. However, I'm only capable to do this a few more times before I hear the sound of a whoosh, on doubt the hidden door opening for someone to enter my prison of a room. Though, I pay them no mind and instead hurry and try to do as much damage to myself that I can before they can get to me. I know it's a pipe wish but I can't help but to wish to be dead with Gale, if he is gone then so should I. I only manage to get two more slams of my head before my arm is pricked by a sharp needle and I'm injected with something.

My eyes fly open and I'm staring into the cold eyes of a Capitol doctor who looks on at me with annoyance. And that's the last thing I see before I'm pulled under to a forced sleepy fog.

Opening my eyes I feel sickly refreshed. The feel of a soft bead underneath me causes a shaky, yet raspy sigh to leave my lips. With unseeing eyes I stare at the ceiling letting the light burn into my retinas as I feel tears build up in my eyes, I want to pretend that they're from the light, but I know its from the loss of hope. The loss of Gale, and more importantly for the life I will be forced to live like Finnick… Like Johanna and the ret of them. Finally letting my eyes blink, the tears trail out of my eyes and down the side of my face and absorb into my hair and the mattress underneath me. I want to be home, to be back in time before any of this has happened. To get to spend more time with my mother, to get to tell how I always felt about him-about how I will always feel about him. But most importantly I wish I could have died in that arena. If I had then Gale would be alive. There is no doubt in my mind that he is gone, if he wasn't he would be in this room with me, right? I wouldn't be restrained to this bed like some wild prisoner.

The whooshing sound once again filled the silent air around me, causing me to flinch away from the sound and for fear to well up in my chest as my heart starts to race. Looking towards the sound I am met with a curious sight. A tall and slender red headed girl, that I know is an Avox, there is no doubt about it. From her mute and submissive demeanor to the red suit she wears. I can't help but watch her with a slightly parted mouth, not understanding what is happening. But what I do know is that I'm being watched.

She walks over to the side of the bed then sets the tray she is carrying down gently on the side table and situates my pillows so I am raised up slightly. As she does this I can't help but whisper out, "is Gale still alive?" I feel like I'm battling against myself, that he is and that he isn't, but I need to know for sure. I need to have concrete information. As the girl pulls back from me her vibrant green eyes meet mine and he gives a very subtle nod of her head that causes relief to flood inside of me and for new tears to spring to my eyes. However, this time they're from being so happy.

I watch wordlessly as the Avox gently releases, first my wrists then my ankle from the restraints then she delicately places the tray she brought into the room onto my lap before leaving the room. I swallow thickly, then lick my lips as I look down at the tray, taking in its contents with hunger starting to build up. A tall glass of water with a straw in it sits next to clear bowl of what looks chicken broth, and a small serving of apple sauce. I can't help but stare at the food with confusion, is this really all I get?

With a small ounce of guilt starting to build up inside of me I release a low sigh and be grateful for what I'm given and very slowly start to eat. And to my surprise what food I am given I find it a bit hard to finish it all. I guess my stomach has gotten smaller than I had initially thought. When I am finished eating I take the tray off my lap and place it onto the side of the bed next to me. Then with a hammering heart and over wracked nerves I slowly slide to my feet off the bed, my eyes flying all around the room not positive if I'm supposed to stay on the bed but wanting more than anything to get up and find a way out of here. With a shaky breath I extend my legs down and slide the rest of the way off the bed, letting my bare feet come in contact with the chilly tiled floor. Swallowing thickly, feeling a terrifying weight on my shoulders I look around the room, no one is rushing in to stop me yet. I guess this is fine.

Tensely, I stretch out my body some. I look down feeling the slick cold feel of silk on my body, and to my disgust I see I am dressed in a white silk nightgown that barely reaches my knees. But I guess its better than nothing. Looking back around the room I try to search the walls for the door. If I can find the door then I can get out of here and start my search for Gale. I take a step forward on my wobbly legs then pause and quickly retrieve the spoon from the bowl of broth, I know it won't do much to really injure someone but at least its something and it helps me feel slightly better.

Then in less then a minute I'm up against the wall where the Avox girl came through from, my fingers tracing over the wall looking for the door even if I can't see it. I startle when the door in front of me opens with a hissing whoosh.

Swallowing down my fear I shakily and uncertainly step into a hallway, my heart beating a mile a minute. The hallway is long and looks deserted. Looking down the hallway I don't see any doors. I'm not very certain of where to go from here, so with a steadying intake of air, I begin to call out for the man I am looking for, not sure if I'll find him or some Capitol scum instead.

"Gale!" I say, my voice barely coming out louder than a normal speaking voice. Letting out another shaky breath I tighten my hand on the spoon as my other hand curls into a tight fist.

"Gale!" I yell out, my wide eyes looking down one side of the hallway then down the other side then back again. "Gale!" After another cry out for him, I hear my name being called out in return, which causes me to fall quite. It's not his voice that I hear but one that is still familiar to me. It is less shrill sounding than normal but unmistakably it belongs to Effie Trinket. Walking towards her voice down right side of the hallway I come to a corner I hadn't seen then turn it and see them all waiting in a big chamber at the hallway-Effie, Cinna, and Haymitch.

I take off without hesitation into a run and slam into Haymitch's body, grasping at him tightly, in fear he might disappear. I know as a victor I should show more restraint but I can't help it, even if I know we're most likely being taped and monitored. An overflow of tears come to my eyes as he squeezes me back just as tightly.

"Good job sweetheart, I knew you had it in you pearl." Haymitch whisper into my hair causing a watery laugh to bubble out of me, knowing he must have been the only one because I sure didn't believe I could.

Pulling back from him, my wet eyes meet his tired gray eyes, feeling shaky with delight of seeing my godfather, of seeing these few people who believed in me and had my back. Looking over to my side I give Effie a watery smile then awkwardly wipe my eyes dry with the sleeve of my shirt before move and pull her into a hug, that she returns. Giving my hair an affectionate pat as she talks with teary eyes about how she told everyone we were diamond's in the rough, just needed a little shine is all. Before I'm released then I'm pulled into a hug by Cinna who silently hugs me tightly.

Stepping back from them I notice that Portia is absent and get a tinge of bad feeling starting to brew inside me. With a hesitant breath I steal my nerves.

"Where's Portia? Is-is she with Gale? Is he alive? Is he alright?" I blurt out.

"He's fine. They want to do your reunion live on air at the ceremony," Haymitch says.

The awful feeling of dread and fear I had leaves me now that I know for sure Gale is alive, "oh, that's all?" I say in a hushed voice "I guess I would want to see something like that myself."

"Go with Cinna. He has to get you all ready." Haymitch puts forth. Wordlessly, I give Him a nod before following after Cinna out of the room.

Being alone with Cinna is a relief, feeling his protective arm around my shoulders as he guides me away from the cameras. He leads me down a few different hallways that all look the same, then through a couple of passages, and onto an elevator that leads to the lobby of the Training Center. We pass by a handful of guards standing on duty.

Out footsteps echo in the empty hall, then we ride up to the twelfth floor. As we ride up in the elevator, my mind is assaulted with the images of all the tributes who will not be going home, of the friends I lost. The ones I killed. There's a tight pain in my chest as my emotions start to bubble up, pulling me underneath into despair. Cinna's heavy, yet gentle hand on my shoulder causes me to jump. Looking up at him, he gives me a kind smile and gestures for me to exit the elevator. I was so absorbed in my own sorrow I hadn't even realized the elevator even stopped, let alone that the elevator doors opened in front of us.

Following Cinna out of the elevator, I take notice of the three faces in front of me, Venia, Flavius, and Octavia. Who engulf me the second I step out of the elevator; taking about things I can't quite understand from how quickly and ecstatically they speak. Though, their sentiment is clear to me. They are truly thrilled with delight to see me back and alive, and honestly I'm happy to see them as well. Although, its not like how I was to see Cinna. Its more like the way you'd get glad about seeing an affectionate animal after a tiring day.

They lead me into the dining room, and in there I get an actual meal, though my portions are being controlled. My plate has roast beef, corn, a roll, and a small side of chopped up strawberries, paired with a tall glass of water, but this time nix the straw. I have a fleeting thought to ask for seconds but I'm not sure my stomach could take it as well as I might spew it back up on the stage.

The I'm lead into my room where Cinna leaves me for a while with my prep team to get ready. "Oh, they did a full body polish on you, not a flaw in sight." Flavius says enviously. But as I look at my naked body in the full length mirror all I can see is how skinny I have gotten while in the games, for the first time in my life I can clearly see each one of my ribs pressing firmly against my skin, which has my stomach turning in disgust. I'm sure I probably even look worse when I first came out of the games, how many days ago that might have been I'm not quite sure of. They bath and scrub at me until I'm deemed clean enough, then they paint my nails, do my hair, and makeup. I'm very thankful for how talkative they all are, since it leaves me not having to talk, which I really appreciate. They talk about a whole lot of mindless things that I find myself tuning them out as I stare with unseeing eyes, thinking about what my life will be like once we get back home. Will everyone be watching me and waiting for me to crack? Will they all fear me? Will they still say nasty things about me behind my back?

Before I know it, Cinna is walking back into the room. I take a look around and notice we're alone in the room. It's funny how I get absorbed in my own mind that I just basically shut down and stop noticing things happening around me. Looking back at Cinna I let a small smile slip onto my lips as I take notice of the white dress hanging from the hanger in his hand, "what, no more girl on fire?" I ask jokingly as I raise an eyebrow.

With a friendly smile Cinna walks over to me then drapes the dress over my head, letting it fall over my body. As the dress settles over my body, I frown feeling the padding in the breast portion of the dress, giving me some of the curves I lost in the games. I'm surprised that they didn't try to modify me while I was knocked out. With deft subconscious movements, my hands move up to my chest and I can't help but letting my frown deepen.

"I know, but the Gamemakers wanted to alter you surgically. Haymitch had a large fight with them about that. This was the compromise." Cinna explains, helping me step into a pair of plain white flats.

"You can look now," he says with a pleased expression painted onto his face.

With a deep breath I turn around to look at myself in the mirror, which causes the ends of my white dress to flame with a gentle warm pleasant glow, that flickers up the dress. I look something like an illuminated angel of sorts, which has my mouth dropping open slight in surprise. Not expecting to be dressed in the fashion.

"What do you think?" Cinna asks.

"I think it's the best yet," I reply. When I'm able to drag my eyes off the dress, I look at my loose curled hair that is only held back from my face by a simple satin ribbon, making me look almost like a child again in all its naive innocence. I look like I did at fourteen. All pink cheeked and shy. The makeup fills out the sharp angles of my face. And a clear gloss pained on my nails. The dress is sleeveless, and gathered at my ribs instead of at my waist, taking away any shape the padding to my bust would give. The hem of the dress falls just past my knees. And without any heels I stand at my slightly short stature. I look very simple, like a little girl. I look innocent and harmless. Just looking at myself I understand this is a very calculated look. Nothing Cinna designs is arbitrary, but I'm not sure what his motive for this look is.

"I thought I would be more sophisticated looking…" I confide quietly, letting myself trail off.

"I thought Gale and you would like this better," he answers carefully.

No way is this for Gale and myself. There is no doubt in my mind about that. It has to be about the Capitol, the Gamemakers, the audience, and Snow. However, I can't for certain think of why this is. We take the elevator to the place where we trained. Its customary for the victor and his ore her support team to rise from beneath the stage; first the prep team, followed by the escort, the stylist, the mentor, and finally the victor. Only this year, with the result of two victors, I know the whole thing has to be rethought. Cinna leads me over to a faintly lit area, where I stand on a metal plate the with deft fingers he pins my aunts pin to the collar of my dress. But my mind is blank not knowing what is coming next for me-for us.

I stare at my shoes feeling my stomach knot as my nerves rise up in me. All around me the air is filled with the loud rumbling of the crown from above. I'm wrapped up in my own nerves I don't notice Haymitch until he lays a hand onto my shoulder. Instantly I spring back away from him. My eyes widen to the size of saucers. My mind still locked away in the arena.

"Easy Pearl, its just me. Lets have a look at you." Haymitch says.

With a roll of my eyes, a smile comes to my lips as the feeling of nostalgia embraced me, then holding my arms out and with an overly exasperated twirl around I shoe him my dress making a smile come to his face. Yup, just like old times.

"I guess good enough," Haymitch says with a hint of humor in his voice, reminding me of home, of how he always tried to make me feel comfortable and not think too much on certain things.

Smiling I let him see me roll my eyes at him, which causes him to smile broadly at me. His eyes shine clear with no alcohol tint to them, just pure happiness. I know he missed me as much as I missed him. Having known Haymitch my whole life I can see the worry etched in his slightly tense demeanor. Swallowing I force the words out, "but what?"

I watch as his eyes look around the musky holding area before his eyes meet mine again. "But nothing sweetheart. How about a hug, huh Pearl?" Haymitch questions, his eyes give me a meaningful swift look before avoiding my eyes all together. I can tell that while he hasn't said anything (if he even will say anything) but I see the determination in his gray eyes that I know very well.

Giving him a sweet smile I nod then place my arms around him and squeeze tightly, making sure we're close enough that no one will hear if we whisper. I feel Haymitch squeeze me tightly to him, is lips buried in my hair, no doubt hidden away from any cameras view. "Listen up Pearl, you're trouble. The Capitol is furious about you showing them up in the arena, showing so much rebellion. One thing they can't stand is to be laughed at and be the joke of Panem." Haymitch says, in a fast and quiet voice making my heart sink. I feel dread full me to the brim but force out a smile and musically sounding laugh, as if he has said something funny. "What then?" I reply, not being able to say anything further since my lips aren't covered.

"Your only defense can be that you were so madly in love you weren't responsible for your hasty actions." Haymitch says as he pulls back from me, giving me a searching look then he adjusts my hair ribbon and gives me a genuine smile that strikes my heart. I want to tell him I'm happy to see him as well but I know I can't with them watching us.

"Got it Pearl?"

"Got it… Did you tell Gale this?" I inquire, feeling my cheeks heat as I talk about the man I love to my god father.

Haymitch smiles at me, his eyes turning slightly hard before his smile fades away. "Yeah, didn't have to. He already knows." He replies giving my shoulders a squeeze before letting go and taking a step back.

"And you think I don't?" I demand, feeling a strange sense bubbling up in my stomach. Anger, sorrow, fear; I'm not entirely sure.

"Since when did you care about what I think Madge?" Haymitch pulls causing me to go silent as my guilt gnawed at my stomach.

"I always listen to what you have to say, even if I don't necessarily follow those words." I state, fixing his crimson bow tie. Wishing more than anything we were siting in his large victor house in victor village instead of being watched thoroughly by the President.

"This is your night Pearl, you have this. Do what you need and enjoy it." He says before kissing my forehead then giving me a meaningful look before pulling back from me, with that he starts to walk off until he disappears into the darkness beyond the light that surrounds my metal plate.

Subconsciously, I tug at the skirt of my dress feeling nerves start to boil over, as well as willing it to be a bit longer. In a second I realize my whole body is shaking like a leaf in the wind, blowing about aimlessly. I try to take in a steadying breath, but the moldy smell under the stage threatens to choke me. I know I will never live a day when I don't flashback to the Hunger Games I was in. Of the people I lost, the ones I grew to love. I will forever be a broken girl searching to be whole again, in vain. Haymitch's words confuse me slightly, leaving a foul taste in my mouth as well as in my stomach, turning it in disgust but not leaving me any explanation of why that it is. I feel wrecked with nerves, not knowing what to say or do while being forced to watch the recap of the games. But knowing if I mess up it will be at Gale and my expense.

In a matter of seconds I hear the anthem bloom loudly around us. I listen intently and hear the voice of Caesar Flickerman, his excitable boyish voice rings out. I listen as he greets the audience then he asks the audience if they're ready for the star-crossed lovers and for the show to start, which is met with loud roaring applause and shouts if agreement. When the audience simmers down, he tells them that they'll have to wait until they've introduced everyone else first, which is met with some boos and laughter. I somehow am able to drown out loud roaring applause and focus my eyes on my dress, letting them roam over the gorgeous gown, finally understanding what this look means. I'll need to look naïve and girlish, to try and take the attention away from me playing by my own rules in the game. I swallow thickly, thinking about what President Snow would do if this look doesn't pull it off for the Capitol.

"I'm almost home," I breath out lowly into the mildew air lingering around me from where I am kept underneath the stage. I just have to make through a couple more hours then I'll be on my way to District Twelve. We'll be going home, Gale and I. And we'll be together.

The metal plate I'm standing on starts to rise up, and I feel my heart all about stop. Wishing I wasn't as hectic feeling, being riddled with so much fear I feel my hands begin to shake. Taking in a deep breath I slowly release it.

"You got this Madge, its just like it was back home. Smile and wave like a good girl." I whisper to myself, trying in vain to relax myself. But at least I'm able to stop the shaking of my hands and plaster on a bright smile just as the blinding lights from above shine down on me.

Immediately, my eyes find Gale's and before I can comprehend what I'm doing, I am running towards him and he is running at me just as fast. We clash into each other roughly, but we remain standing as we grasp at each other. Its like we're both afraid that we'll get separated once again. Pulling back from him a real smile comes to my fast as my eyes tear up. He's okay. Standing in front of me is a healthy looking Gale, who looks just as happy to see me as I feel seeing him. Then in a swift move on pure wild impulse, I quickly rise onto the tips of my toes and plant my lips to his in a passionate kiss. Trying to wordlessly tell him how happy I am to see him, to explain all that he means to me. That I would go through all that again as long as I knew he would be safe and sound. He means more to me than I ever expected I could possibly care about someone. There is no denying it, I am hopelessly, completely, and irrevocably in love with Gale Hawthorne, for the good and the bad he own my heart.

The crowd goes crazy with cheers and excitement, finally breaking through our happy little bubble. I blush red with embarrassment as I pull back from Gale sheepishly. He gives me his famous smirk, but as I look into his eyes I can tell it doesn't reach them. His gray eyes look confused before they look indecipherable, locked away with a stoic gaze I know all too well. 'He must be nervous and embarrassed of the whole of Panem watching us share that steamy of a kiss.' I think, my cheeks heating even more from embarrassment. Truth be told I don't know what came over me but I seem to always be like that around Gale. He makes me forget the act I'm supposed to put on. He makes me want to be Madge, the real one that not that many people know, or even care to get to know. But he wants to.

I see Caesar laugh heartily then his mouth is moving and I'm too distracted to be able to understand, and with a quick glance at Gale shows he is as well. With a swift shove from Haymitch, we make our way over to the loveseat set across from Caesar's pale blue chair. I stumble slightly and am righted swiftly by Gale as he pulls me close, gently slamming me into his sturdy chest.

Gale sit down on the loveseat, pulling me down with him and causing me to knock awkwardly against his side. Our shoulders hitting then we're both letting our soft chuckles and the crowd grows alive with 'awes'. Looking over to Gale, I see his eyes are casted off to the left of the stage where Haymitch sits in between Effie and Cinna. I watch as Haymitch hardens his gaze at Gale then gives a barely noticeable shake of hi head. But before his eyes can turn to meet mine, I drop my gaze to where Gale holds my hand. His thumb lovingly caresses the top of my hand then he is drawing his hand away and jerking me closer to his side causing me to practically rest in his lap. I blush deeply and try to hide my face into Gale's chest, which makes the audience go berserk over this. I feel Gale's nose burry into my hair, and feel him take in a deep calming breath before pressing a swift kiss to my head. Bringing my head out from his chest I take notice that my feet are on the loveseat as well, so quickly I toe off my shoes and pull my feet underneath me. My strict upbringing still permanently engrained in me.

Laying my head on Gale's shoulder, I feel his hand grasp my waist tightly, telling me slightly we're in this together. I give Caesar a shy smile as I wait impatiently for him to start the damn footage. My eyes cut to Gale's white shirt, which is made of the material as my dress and I want to laugh about the fact that we're matching once again. But instead of I just smile mutely. Loving the feeling of his warm body around mine, protecting me just like back in the cave in the arena. We make a good team.

Caesar makes a few jokes then we're on with the show. I'm dreading the three hours viewing, that forces us to watch the games, or rather the highlights of us in the game. As the light dim and the seal appears I realize I'm in no way prepared for this. I honestly don't know how I'm going to deal with seeing Rue and River, and the other people who I knew and even some of them that I grew close with. I don't want to watch the twenty-two other tributes dies too early in life, not getting to experience some prominent milestones in life. I barely made it through it, I don't know if I'll be able to make it through watching it all unfold. Of seeing me do all those foul things.

I feel my heart start to pound rapidly in my chest, and the overwhelming instinct in me to get up and run. How have the past victors been able to get up and do this alone? I know that during the highlights that they periodically show the victors reactions. How am I supposed to handle that? I can't be like Cashmere or Gloss and laugh and pump up my enthusiasm of my triumphant kills. I understand these people were just that, people. They all had lives, hopes, and fears that got teared away from them with a sinister swipe from Snow's sick twisted pleasure, as well as the Capitol. I won't be able to shrug it off strongly like Johanna. I won't be able to be like Finnick and charm my way out of most of the discussions; and I most certainly won't be able to use my jittered mind like Annie and skip past the whole thing.

Gale gives my hip a reassuring squeezes as his mouth moves towards my spin. "It's going to be okay, Madge." He whispers into my ear before giving my neck a lingering kiss then he pulls back, his eyes going to the screen, and I follow his lead. I know he is the only thing keeping me seated on this loveseat. His hand gently and lovingly strokes at my side as I grasp with both hands to his other hand that lays in my lap.

Whoever is in charge of putting together the reel of film has chosen from a large amount of footage. They get to choose hat story they go with. This year it is a love story. However, this year they are looking to destroy me for what I've done. I've undermined them and made them look like a joke to all of Panem. I know that for a long time now that President Snow has wanted to match me up with someone of his choosing. I flinch with disgust just thinking about how he use to call me beautiful and that I would be a prize of a wife. He is a despicable human being, that I wish would just shrivel up and die.

Right from the beginning of the footage it is spent on Gale and in the footage the first half hour focuses on the reaping, the chariot ride through the Capitol, our training scores, and our interviews. There is some ghastly upbeat soundtrack to the footage that makes my skin crawl in disgust. Its cruel that they're playing it when almost everyone on-screen is dead.

When we're in the arena there is detailed coverage of the blood bath. First of when I kill those two kids. They show the surprised expressions of all the tributes. Mine looks like I'm barely containing vomiting, then it linger on a close up of Gale's taken back expression, that makes my stomach turn in guilt and disgust. Wishing more than anything that I didn't have to take anyone's life but knowing its was inevitable for Gale and I to be able to go home. The filmmakers alternate from showing people getting killed to shots of Gale and I.

Watching the footage it feels like watching other people. Its entirely different than having to endure the whole thing. I watch as I lie and join the careers, as Cato and Clove make a deal that if I'm lying they'll kill me together. Of how Marvel tried to look out for me, and how River watched from where he was hidden in the trees a look of uncertainty switching to be replaced to one of determination. Of Gale looking sorrowfully out at the moon then whispering, "Be okay, Madge." Then he ties himself onto a tree branch, before falling asleep. I watch with a numb sense covering me as I drug the careers then I finish off that poor girl from District Nine. Of the lingering looks Cato frequently sent me that I had no idea of. Of the alliance River and I made.

It is something of its own getting to watch what the audience has seen. It's like watching someone else, someone strong and determined. Not the weak little privilege girl everyone knows I am. I watch as I cut down the tracker jacker nest, as Gale solely trekked around the arena with a sorrowful look plastered to his angelic face.

I all but let my jaw drop open as Gale mumbles my name in his sleep, making my heart flutter with love and bliss. I watch with baited breath as I run away from the fireballs and try to outrun the careers; of how I met Rue and eventually met back up with her and River, as well as of Thresh and Gale's run-in. I watch with tear filled eyes as I watch friend after friend die. River and Rue's being the hardest. I feel my chest tighten and my body wants to start shaking from my pilling up tears, but refuse and push myself to be strong for my late friends. I notice they don't show me covering Rue in flowers but they do show me singing to my little bird with teary eyes, which causes my heart to ache with deep sorrow that constricts my throat. She was too young for this kind of death, too young and too innocent. None of these kids deserved this, not even Cato and Clove.

I feel like around River's death I just shut down, though my unseeing eyes stare unblinkingly at the screen. It's like watching complete strangers in this years games, but I know its us. Though I do notice that things do pick up once they announce two tributes from the same District can live; of how I carelessly shot out Gale's name. You can see the deep love I feel for Gale, even if I tried to hide it. I'm almost positive I couldn't even if I wanted to. I see us meeting up then me making a bolt for it, being too overly emotional to comprehend what is going on.

They make a show of Gale and I kissing, followed by me tricking Gale then heading out to the feast, where I almost die against Clove before getting mercifully spared by Thresh. Then Gale and I are running from the mutts, and I make a terrible decision of trying to be a decent person and help Cato, which ends with him attacking us while our attention is elsewhere. I watch with a turning stomach as Cato viciously attacks Gale before getting knocked off by me. Though, we both go falling to the ground. I can feel my hands start to shake as I hold my breath, knowing what is about to follow. Gale tightens his hand on mine and once again starts stroking his thumb on the top of my hand. But instead of Cato trying to force himself on me it skips to us fighting. Of how I miraculously get the upper hand and assault Cato with everything I have then stumbling on my feet trying to get back on top of the Cornucopia, while shrieking Gale's name. They give a close up of my teary eyes. And just as it looks like I'm going to be left with Cato, Gale's hand finally grasps mine.

Sucking in a shaky breath I lean more into Gale and stare up at the corner of the screen, wanting to jut be at home where I can hide underneath my covers and attempt to fix what this game has broken in me. But the sound of me gasping for air loudly causes my eyes to flicker to the screen, where I lay on the ground fighting to regain my breathing then pass out, only after having glanced at where Gale viciously punches Cato. Sending one fist after the other to his face, a wild look over takes his face. His gray eyes are hard and filled with unadulterated rage and its all targeted at Cato. After a while Cato stops moving then, shakily Gale falls sideways off of him at the sound of a cannon booming. However, he doesn't pay much attention to the motionless boy but instead he rushes over to where I lie, bleeding from a decent size head wound.

"Madge," his panic strained voice says hoarsely, as he gathers me in his arms pulling me close to him. "We've won Undersee... Come on-you can't do this to me!" I watch in surprise as tears swim in his beautiful eyes and he starts to shake. His blood covered hands hesitantly moves to my neck and checks for a pulse, and after he finds it he releases a raged breath. His eyes fly around wildly looking for something.

"She needs help! Please help her!" His tormented voice bellows, his arms tightening around me.

Relief floods through me as the sound of the winning trumpets and Claudius Templesmith's voice rings out, congratulating us and naming us the newest victors. Which is followed swiftly by us being rendered motionless as we're lifted up into a hovercraft. The screen cuts to black for a few moments and for a brief few seconds I think that it is over, but then it shows both of us banging at the glass wall separating us as the doctors try and subdue me to treat my injuries. As I pass out from an injection and am taken to a gurney, Gale looses it even more then the footage freezes on Gale's concern etched face before turning black once more, but this time it stays like that.

The anthem plays yet again and I force my tears away, giving Gale's hand a tight squeeze, just needing to know he's here with me. And the second I feel his hand squeeze mine back in response I let out a breath of air I hadn't known I was holding. And as the lights come back on we stand as President Snow make his way towards us, his snake like eyes boring into me intently as a sinister smile graces his puffy lips, which has my skin crawling as well as my stomach feeling ill. I never liked his attention focused on me. It always meant something bad for whoever that unlucky person was, and staring at him now I know that unlucky soul is me.

A little girl trails just a few feet behind Snow, carrying a pillow with a single crown on top of it. The crowd must see the single crown as well because in an instant the crowd is murmuring in confusion amongst themselves. No doubt wanting to know which one of us will receive the crown. However, with a swift twist of it, the crown splits into two separate crowns. He places the first crown on top of Gale's head with a small smile and an uninterested 'congratulations.'

He is still smiling when he gets to me, though it seems to have broaden and grew even more sinister. His snake eyes boar into my eyes unforgivingly. He diligently sets the second crown on top of my head, though he lingers in front of me. His beady eyes going from one to the other of mine, before they fall down to the collar of my dress where I know my aunts pin is pinned to my dress. I feel my throat tighten up.

"What a lovely pin," he says.

"It was my aunts."

"Oh, yes. Maysilee Donner, am I correct?" He says, a glint flashes in my eyes making me stand straighter, but force a tight smile and nod. "A pretty little girl, if I remember correctly. Though, no where as beautiful as you are, my dear Margaret."

Snow runs a hand down the side of my face then tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. I have to force myself not to jerk away from Snow; wanting more than anything to slap his clammy hand away from my face.

"I expect great things to come for you Miss. Undersee's," he says giving me another rise of his lips before deftly taking the white rose out of his jacket pocket then places it in my hair, between the ribbon in my hair. "Ah, now that suits you greatly."

"Thank you, Mr. Snow." I force out, my cheeks hurting from the beaming smile I give him, praying more than anything that he still believes me to be some naïve girl. But looking into his eyes I can see that he places me as the instigator and I know he's right.

After awhile of waving and beaming at the crowd I can't wait to head back to the Training Center, though dreading the rest of the interview tomorrow. With a wide smile, Caesar bids the audience goodnight, reminding everyone to tune in tomorrow night for the rest of the show, which is the interview portion. I want to roll my eyes, 'as if we could decide not to watch.' I think, biting the inside of my cheek to stop myself from scoffing. I guess Gale is rubbing off on me more than I had realized. But I guess that would happen with us spending so much time together. Then Gale and I are whisked away to the President's mansion for the victory banquet, where we barely have any time to eat anything.

I feel like a caged animal as the generous sponsors elbow one another out of the way as they try to get their picture taken with us. Face after creepy face, they beam at us, becoming more and more intoxicated as the evening wears on. Occasionally I catch a glimpse of Haymitch, feeling reassured at the small sights of my godfather. But I also catch a few glimpses of President Snow, which is terrifying, but I make sure to keep laughing and smiling as if nothing is wrong. Thanking everyone for their generous donations to help us get along in the game. Though, the one thing I never do is let go of Gale's hand, which is like a life line for me.

The sun is jut peaking into the sky, over the horizon when we stagger exhaustedly back to the Training Center. Perhaps now I'll actually get to have a conversation with Gale in private. However, Haymitch has other plans when he sends him off with Portia to get fitted for another suit for the interview for tomorrow, then personally escorts me back to my door.

"Why can't I talk to him?" I ask, trying to fight off a yawn.

"There will be plenty of time to talk when we get back home," he says. Not once while he talks to me meeting my eyes. But, I'm too tired to investigate why. "Go to bed, you're on the air tomorrow at two. Remember we're not out of this just yet, Pearl. You know how this whole thing works."

With a defeated sigh, I nod mutely then head into my room. After undressing and scrubbing the makeup off my face, I jump into the shower. Then afterwards I dress into a knee length seafoam green silk nightgown before deciding I need to talk to Gale. But, as I try to turn the doorknob I realize it is in fact locked. Of course they'd lock me away until it was convenient for them. I feel like a prisoner, and I know for the most part I am.

As I lay in the lush comfort of the plush bed as my mind wanders to the intent nervous gaze to Haymitch's eyes. If I didn't know him I probably wouldn't have notice but having been around him all of my life I know that he is hiding something. That he is scared of something happening to me. I let my eyes roam over the white ceiling, my mind slowing to a sluggish thought of how I can't wait to get home and start my new life with Gale before I drift off to sleep.

My dreams are filled with so much blood, and just as much pain. I wake up with a start, tears streaming down my cheeks as a hoarse scream claws up my throat. With wide tear blurred eyes, I frantically look around the room I'm in. I'm on high alert, my hammering with panic and fear in my chest. It takes me a few moments to grasp that I am safe in the Training Center and away from the arena. And, when I do my shoulder sag with relief as new tears fall from my eyes, telling of my broken soul and fragile mind. My sobs shake my body leaving me feeling even more empty and alone than I had been feeling.

For the next few hours, I sit against the headboard of the bed, staring at the door wishing more than anything that morning would hurry up and get here. The sooner the sun comes, so would the interview and the sooner we'd be going home. And then finally, Effie's piercing voice states, "big, big, big day!" I feel a smile breakout on my lips, knowing I will be able to get out of this room now.

In no time at all I rush to my feet then sprint out of the room and into the dining room. I frown slightly seeing I'm the first one in the room. With a sigh of disappointment I sit down in my favorite seat then help myself to a bowl of strawberry porridge and a glass of water. Not before too long everyone starts filing in and begins eating as well. I don't listen as Flavius and Octavia gush about how glamourous we looked last night and how everyone they know is jealous that they know us. When I'm halfway finished with my food, Cinna comes in and practically drags me out of the room and into the bedroom I have been staying in while in the Training Center. He wastes no time before having me strip down then dress into a white gauzy dress, with a pale pink silk ribbon threaded through my hair that is braided into a crown on top of my head, the ribbon matches my pink flats. Then he adds on some light makeup. We make small idle chitchat, though I'm afraid to ask him for any information, in fear of what trouble he might get into. I know I'm being watched intently, to make sure I don't make anymore mistakes. I can't bare to think what they would do to my father, the one person I have left of my family.

Before I know it, we're being whisked away for the interview with Caesar. The interview takes place right down the hall in the sitting room. A space has been cleared and a loveseat has been added, and it is surrounded by white, pink, and red roses. There is only a handful of cameras to record and thankfully no audience.

Caesar gives me a big warm hug when I see him, with a beaming smile on his face. "Congratulations, Madge! How are you fairing?"

"Fine, thank you very much. I'm quite excited about the interview and to be back in the Capitol." I state, a large smile plastered on my face making me feel like I'm back at one of my fathers parties.

"As well as you should. We're going to have a fabulous time." He says, giving my cheek a reassuring pat as we all sit down in our seats. I watch silently as Caesar goes over a few notecards. I feel Gael lean into me, his hot breath fanning against my bare neck, making me shiver unintentionally. I can't help but bite my lip to stop myself from smiling like a fool at him.

"I hardly get to see you Undersee, I feel like Haymitch is trying to keep us apart or something." Gale whispers into my ear.

I want to tell him that Haymitch is actually hell bent on keep us alive, but there are too many people listening for me to be able to convey this to him. So instead I force a charming smile, "I guess he's gotten very responsible lately." I reply with humor tinges in my voice.

I watch as a small smile blooms onto his face, which is almost always so serious and scowling.

"Well that's something I would never had thought would be possible to happen, Haymitch actually doing his job?" Gale laughs lowly for only me to hear. "There's just this then we can go home. Then he can't watch over us all the time."

I can't help but smile at him. I also can't wait to go home and start our new life together, to be able to fix the cracks that the games left me with. Gale smiles at me and for some reason it feels slightly different than any of the others he has given me, but then again maybe its just because we're out of the Hunger Games now. Reaching out to me Gale's long slender fingers brush a strand behind my ear and lets the tips of his fingers linger touching my cheek then with an embarrassed blush he pulls his hand back to his lap and turns to look at Caesar.

No sooner he does this than someone starts counting down from ten, then we're broadcasting to the whole of Panem. Caesar is wonderful as usual, joking and teasing, and even getting choked up at the right moments. He and I already have our established friendliness from our first interview, that easy banter that I'm use to having with the strange Capitol guests that come stay at our home back in District Twelve. I notice but don't draw attention to the fact that Gale just smiles shyly and watches Caesar and I converse back and forth. I know these type of people must make him nervous so I try to make him have to answer as little as possible by redirecting the conversation to Caesar and myself. Its strange for me to see Gale behaving so shyly but I guess everyone has more than one side to themselves, even the debonairly handsome Gale Hawthorne.

Eventually though, Caesar begins to turn the questions more towards the games and away from the fine livelihood I know we're both use to living, well me to a certain extent. Feeling my nerves start to stir and wind up I cautiously scoot closer to Gale, using him as a type of human anchor, and all the while keeping my smile shining brightly.

"So Madge, we know you have been caring a torch for Gale for years, but when exactly did that begin?" Caesar asks excitedly, a smile beaming brightly on his lips.

"Since I was ten… He was twelve-he came to my rescues after some mean boys were hassling me. He's always been brave, sticking up for the smaller guys… Maybe that's what drew me in." I shyly get out, my cheeks burning hot with a blush.

"And his handsome looks just added to the appeal!" Caesar jokes, giving me a friendly wink that makes the audience laugh at my reddening face. I can only nod as I bite at my bottom lip.

"But Gale, what a thrilling ride this was for you. I think the real excitement for the audience came from watching you fall for her. When did you realize you were in love with her?" Caesar asks.

"Oh, well… That's a hard on…" Gale says hesitantly, giving an awkward chuckle as he looks over at me then his eyes for a brief second dart out behind the camera before turning them back to mine then finally letting them come to rest on Caesar's.

"Well, I know when I realized it. It was when you were saying her name in your sleep." Caesar puts forth, a welcoming smile pointed at Gale, trying to pull some information from him.

"Yeah I guess that was when it was… But I've always notice her, I mean how could you not? She's beautiful, kind, and smart. I guess I always just tried to not think about how I felt about her since it never seemed possible. However, things changed in those games." Gale states not looking away from Caesar's gaze.

"Why do you think that was?" Caesar urges.

"I don't know… Maybe, because for the first time… For the first time I thought maybe even for a short amount of time I could have her-that at least I could spend a little bit of time in here with her and sender her home to our families. Then the rule change was made and I knew I couldn't stop now that I had a small bit of time with her. It meant I could keep her." He says, an air of shyness circling him.

After giving his answer I could almost swear I see Gale look off behind the camera, but with a blink of my eyes I see that Gale is still looking at Caesar so maybe it was just a slight mistake of my eyes, or rather the lighting playing tricks. Caesar has to pull out a handkerchief because he's so moved, taking a few moments to pull himself together. I can feel Gale press his lips to my right temple his lips lingering on my skin with a kiss, making my stomach knot with happiness.

"So now that you've got me what are you going to do with me, Madge?" Gale asks all in good fun, but the far away look in his gray eyes tells me he's not all here at the moment. However, I can't blame him since he's in no way use to dealing with these types of people like I am.

"I guess I'll just have to lock you up somewhere to keep you safe." I meekly get out. A fond smile stretches across my lips as I stare into Gale's hypnotic gray eyes, knowing that I will try as hard as I can to keep him safe from whatever I've accidently started while in the games. Feeling tears start to build up in my eyes from my happiness I quickly place my lips against Gale's, as soon as our lips touch the people in the room actually sigh and I have to force myself not to scowl from annoyance. I could almost be mistaken for someone from the seam like Gale or Katniss.

Caesar, takes this as a perfect place to turn our conversation towards all the ways we've gotten hurt while in the arena, from burns, to stings, to dislocated shoulders, and wounds. The whole while I plaster a smile on my face, not being able to stop the far away look I get in my eyes as I stare unseeingly at Caesar. It's not until I hear Caesar start talking about the mutts that I realize what I am starting to do, and after a few seconds I give myself a slight shake of my head ridding myself of the airiness that is starting to set around me. Maybe this is what Annie feels like.

Hearing Caesar talking about Gale getting attacked by Cato causes me to burst out in tears knowing he only got attacked in suck a violent way because me, even though I know he's okay now. I think its because I feel guilty for putting Cato anywhere near him, of letting him be able to do that to him. Not being able to help myself, I burry my face into Gale's chest, letting myself take refuge for even just a short amount of time. Taking advantage of the fact that no one can see me I let myself be rendered into a shaking, crying mess; hating that I caused Gale any type of pain.

It takes a few minutes before they can talk me away from Gale's chest but when they do we continue the interview. Caesar leaves me alone for a while before after a while turning to me with a gentle smile as he begins to question me about charging into Cato and saving Gale.

"Madge, I know you've had quite a bit of shock lately, but I've got to ask. The moment when you surged into Cato, knocking the two of you off the Cornucopia. What was going through your mind?" He says.

I take a long pause, looking from Caesar then to Gale then back again. Taking in a calming sigh, I force a shy smile. "I don't know… I just couldn't let Cato hurt him. I can't bear the thought of anyone hurting him… And as much as I wanted to never be without him, I would rather die than anything happening to him. So I decided that if I needed to be sacrificed for the man I love with all of my heart, than so be it… I guess I wasn't really thinking, just listening to my heart telling me to save Gale, so I did."

"Gale, is there anything you would like to add?" Caesar asks.

"No. I think what she says goes for the both of us, I can't live without you Madge." Gale says, a warm gentle smile gracing his lips.

Caesar signs off, and in seconds we're engulfed in hugs and cheers of excitement congratulations. But, I can't really focus on all of this. Instead I stare transfixed as Gale wanders cautiously over to Haymitch, I watch as they share a few words, which causes both of them to nod and release relief looking sighs that make an unknowing weight hang over my shoulders filling me with uncertainty. When had they become close?

Without being able to question Haymitch, I go back to my room to collect my things. Though, the only thing I have is my pin and my reaping dress that I change back into. Looking at myself in the mirror, I can't help but think of how changed and yet unchanged I look. I look the same in looks, but I do seem slimmer as well as that my eyes have this distant look to them now. However, all together I'm pretty much the same girl I was before I left, well to a certain point. My hair is left down in loose curls with a white silk ribbon keeping my hair out of my face.

After a short while, Gale and I are driven in a car to the awaiting train. We barely have any time to say goodbye to Cinna and Portia, although we'll see them in a few months, when we tour the districts for a round of victory ceremonies. It's the Capitol's way of reminding everyone that the Hunger Games never really go too far away. We'll be given a lot of useless plaques, and everyone will pretend they love us, even though we're murderers.

The train begins to move, and we're plunged into the darkness of night. Coming out of the tunnel does nothing for the lighting, it is still dark as can be. While Gale and I are aboard the train, we aren't the only ones. Effie and Haymitch are both aboard the train as well. We all eat an enormous dinner that is engulfed in complete silence besides the occasional clinks of forks on plates and glasses hitting the surface of the table top. On the far corner of the room, the TV plays a replay of the interview. With the Capitol growing farther away every passing second, I begin to think of home. Of the life Gale and I will forge for ourselves. I excuse myself to change out of my dress and into a comfortable top and matching set of bottoms before making a reappearance in the dining cart, where I walk into Gale and Haymitch talking in hushed tones that die the instance I reenter the car.

Though this ruffles my feathers slightly, I can't help but think about how I won't be the sad and alone Madge Undersee's as I use to be. I will be of use to someone. I will be wanted and loved for just me, not for the money I have or the blood I share with someone. I will just be me, Madge. And I couldn't be more happier than I am this instance. I let my eyes flit over to Gale, taking in his handsome features that are stoic as ever. I stare at him, trying painfully to remember who I am. The girl who was left alone, who was scorn by everyone without them trying to get to know her.

Just as I'm lowering myself into a chair, we're pulling into a station to fuel up. I watch subconsciously as Haymitch get up and takes a large bottle of liquor with him before leaving the car. Gale looks over at me silently, his familiar scowl present and heart warming as ever. At least some things won't change.

Want to go for a short walk while we fuel up?" I find myself asking Gale. He stares at me for a few second before he gives an grunt, that leaves me unsure of its meaning. With a short pause, I get to my feet and give Gale a bright smile before leading us off the train. I feel like my arm is concrete on Gale's arm from the way he scowls, almost alien but I know from being in the games with him that he cherishes me as much as he cherishes me. Walking along the tracks I observe the beautiful wild flower that make my heat feet content.

Letting go of Gale's arm I aimlessly pluck up every wild flower in my reach, gathering them into a small bouquet that I can give to Gale's young sister Posey. I'm sure she will be delighted with. I'm not sure of what to say in the vast silence that envelops us. I can't help but smiling brightly at thinking about the cute display his sister will present us with but my smile soon drops at the sneer etched onto Gale's face. But before I can question of his sudden sower turn of emotions, Haymitch appears. With a swift look between the two of us his gray eyes come to rest on mine.

"We're to be off now." He states, a forced small smile on his lips that leave me feeling uneasy. Without a word, Gale and I follow Haymitch back onto the train.

No sooner does the train start back up does Haymitch pat my back, "Good job, you two. Just keep it up until we get back to the district and away from all these cameras."

I can't help but look after Haymitch as he leaves us alone in the dining car mumbling to himself. Looking over at Gale, I scowl in confusion. "I wonder what's up with him." I say absentmindedly. Staring at the door my god father disappeared through.

I don't expect an answer from Gale, but that doesn't stop him from answering me, "come on. You know what he's talking about. He's been couching us from the start, before we got into those games. Of the scene we were to put on to get out of there. You knew Madge. You had to know, he said it was your idea. You knew right? That everything between us was fabricated for the stupid Capitol people so we could come out of this alive." Gale states in a detached monotone.

I feel my eyes well up with tears as my heart constrict painfully in my chest threatening to break what's left of me. I stare with blurry eyes at Gale as he glares at me and I feel utterly devastated. All of this was some ploy to get back to district twelve for him? I was just some stupid townie all alone to him. Just some ignorant girl who was too gullible for his attention, and Haymitch knew that. I feel my lip start to quiver as my pain starts to engulf me threatening to unravel me completely but I can't let that happen. I can't let him of all people see me like this.

"You knew, right Madge?"

Forcing a pained smile I beam brightly at my fellow tribute and let out an airy laugh, much like the ones I've heard from Annie in the past. "Of course I knew. I was the one who came up with it in the first place. I just got caught up in the act that's all." I force out. Every single word feeling like a barbed wire being tightened around my fragile heart, tearing it more into tiny pieces until there is nothing.

Gale looks at me with furrowed brows as my stomach twists and turns in knots. Wishing more than anything that I could just crawl into a hole in the ground and die, anything would be better than this. I can't even begin to think about what my life will be like now. I will be all alone, no doubt while Gale lives happily ever after with Katniss. I will slowly ebb into insanity while they flourish into some happy family.

A watery laugh bellow out of me, constricting my hear even further. Letting me know I am still nothing in this life to Gale. Just some privilege girl he could careless about. I will always be from town and him from the seam, nothing will ever change when it comes to him and it hurts finally realizing it.

The closer we get to district twelve the more pained I feel, finally realizing how alone I will be once we get home. I know my father won't want anything further to do with me once I get home, not with me looking too similar to my late mother and aunt. I know he will distance himself from me, while Katniss has already done so. The only person I'm sure I still have is poor innocent Peeta.

Before I try to utter another word to make Gale feel better I feel my bottom lip start to quiver with my bearly contained sorrow. Forcing a smile I move past him and head towards the cars door, only stopping in front of it, "you're a really great guy, Katniss is a lucky girl. I hope for the best for you two." I manage to say, a pained smile stretched upon my lips before I disappear through the door and head for my room while aboard the train. My heart feels heavy with pain and ignorance. How was I so blind to all of this? Why would Gale go along with this? And more importantly, why had Haymitch done this to me?"

Once in my room I wait till the door is closed before letting myself fall like a bag of rocks to the ground as pain filled sobs wrack my small frame. I feel like I might die. That I can't trust anyone, and that like always I am alone. But no matter my pain, we will be pulling into the station of district twelve, bringing with us a large portion of food for everyone as well as Gale back to his family… Back, to Katniss.

I feel numb and empty as I stare absently from the ground of the train car out the window watching as the trees come into view like a green blur. With a jolt I cringe away from the door to my room as Haymitch enters. A look of caution as well as concern plaster onto his face, making me want to break down all together.

"I just wanted you to come home, safe and sound." He starts before trailing off as he sees my quivering lip as my body starts to tremble with my building up sobs.

I shake my head slowly, still not being able to take this all in. "I should have know… Why would Gale ever like me? He could never love someone like me. I was just too stupid to understand that. Blinded by what could be instead of thinking thoroughly through this like I normally would. I just… I just thought that for one that I could be something. That I could be worth someone like Gale, but I was wrong. Gods was I wrong." I mumble out in a monotone. The sadness inside of me working its way into a cold numbness that I knew I will carry for the rest of my life, for how ever long that may be.

"Pearl… That boy is nothing compared to you. This was all my doing, don't beat yourself up please. I just…" Haymitch starts before I hold up a hand, giving him a stern blank stare.

"I don't care. I just want to be left alone… So please leave me alone." I say without a second thought, my heart beating distantly in my chest.

With a look of pain etched in his eyes I watch unfazed as Haymitch leave my room, leaving me alone like I'm use to. I stay seated on the ground watching unseeingly as the green scenery passed by, wishing more than anything that this was a dream but knowing full well that that isn't possible.

I don't know how long I sit on the ground staring unseeingly at the window but the next moment, Effie is knocking sharply at my door, "Madge, darling we're just about pulling up to district twelve. You should get ready." She says chirpily before I hear her heels clicking off down the hall, leaving me alone once again.

Without really paying any attention to what I'm doing, I get to my feet then strip and pull on my reaping dress. Making sure to fasten my late aunts pin to the front of it while making sure I keep my tears at bay. I just have to stay strong until I get to my room, once I get to my room I'll be able to cry. To let all my heartbreak out and slowly pick up the pieces of my broken self up until I can somewhat piece myself back together again.

With a stolen breath of comfort I plaster on my famous smile and make my way out of my room and towards where Effie, Haymitch, and Gale all stand near the door of the train. I feel everyone's eyes on me but I can't find it inside myself to care let alone to look at them, so instead I stare unseeingly outside, silently preparing myself for the overjoyed welcome I know we will get once we pull into the station of district twelve.

As the train comes to a slow I notice out of the corner of my eye as Gale comes up to stand next to me, giving me a strange look. Without looking at him I spread my smile wider then extend my hand towards him, ignoring the ache that pains my heart.

"One more time? For the audience?" I say. My voice impassive and detached, not offering anything up. Without a word, Gale takes my hand as the train comes to a stop, the doors opening to show us off to the happy crowd of district twelve. Holding onto his hand tightly I make sure my face shows all that the Capitol and viewers want to see. Dreading the moment I will have to let go, even if he doesn't have any feelings for me.

**The End Book One.**


End file.
